


Dirt and Iron

by Stuff (rosegardenlake)



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Blood Drinking, Blood and Gore, Compulsion, Decapitation, M/M, Romance, Torture, Vampire Hunter Keith, Vampire Hunters, Vampire Shiro (Voltron), Vampires
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-21
Updated: 2018-09-21
Packaged: 2019-07-14 16:18:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 13
Words: 131,376
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16044053
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rosegardenlake/pseuds/Stuff
Summary: Keith’s mentor, Krolia, has always warned him from the very beginning: show mercy to a vampire and you’re dead.  They're snakes, they're liars, they'll kill you if you're stupid enough to ever give them a chance.  As a beloved member of the Blade, Keith’s lived by this.  He’s never had any reason to question Krolia.  She's always told him how his family was killed by them, after all.Keith’s a good fighter.  Krolia’s trained him into the perfect weapon.  But when a newly turned vampire doesn’t fight back, Keith hesitates, and to hesitate is to be killed.  But the vampire doesn’t hurt him.  The vampire saves his life instead.  And from that moment on, Keith is gone.Maybe vampires aren’t as bad as he thought.  Maybe Keith’s not who he thought he was.  Maybe Krolia’s been lying to him all along.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Welcome to the first Big Bang I've ever participated it!! Thank you to [Ana](http://blackxpaladins.tumblr.com/) for being one of my artists!! Their piece is posted in chapter 5, but it's spoiler-y, so I won't mention it yet! ;)
> 
> A big big thank you to Synne for reading this over and offering suggestions to me and dealing with my 2AM panic over this, haha. Also thanks to Hino and Awkward Turtle for beta-ing what they could on such short notice. Thanks, you three! <3

Their town is always bustling during the day.  Busy little worker ants focused on what’s in front of them and only that.  There’s shouting. There’s laughter. There’s life.

It’s funny how different this full town can look when the sun shines over it versus how it is bathed in blue moonlight. The moon peeks over the tops of buildings and looks out over streets of...no one.  No life, no bristling bright energy, just silence.

Keith feels he can understand this town in the moonlight, but not now, in the sun, filled with the sounds of laughing children clinging to their parents’ clothes, bundled warm and tight, feeling _safe_ .  Their parents look down at them, smiling warmly with a face that says what they don’t have to, what’s assumed: _you’re home_.

...Keith’s always longed for that.

He knows he should turn away.  Not think about it. He’s had a busy night, after all.  He’s tired and grumpy and still in his full gear, bundled tight and secure, but also sweating beneath the layers of leather in the bright noontime sun.  The intensity of it is starting to build a migraine at the base of his skull and he rubs at his temples, irritated. He’s just not in his right mind.

But he always feels it; it’s deeply rooted into his chest: he wants to go home.  Someplace he can return to where he feels safe and full and complete. ...He’s not really sure where that is though.  If he returns to his living quarters - the lonely lighthouse on the edge of the sea cliff - he will find no one there to welcome him but his mess of books and the wide open space of his empty attic.

Home.  He’s still searching for it and if he can’t find it, somehow it’s comforting to be around others who have it.  That’s why he’s here, sitting on the roof of a tall building, leaning against a pillar on the edge in the shadows, staring down at the people oblivious to his presence.

Kolivan and Krolia would tell him not to think about it.  That it’s good that he doesn’t have a family, that it just means he can pour his focus into his training.  There are no distractions this way.

When he was younger, Keith used to agree, because he trusted them and they were cool and strong and always right, of _course_.  But now?  Keith’s not sure if he believes them.  Krolia especially.

He looks down at the city, at the people that they save and he feels...

He doesn’t know what he feels.

It’s not like he wants to tug on the back of someone’s shirt and pretend the world is all dandy and carefree.  He doesn’t need anyone to wait for him. But he just thinks it’d be nice to have someone he could call his own. Someone who would look at Keith like he was special to him. Whether it be a mother or a father, an uncle or aunt.  Maybe even someone closer...

Who would want him anyway?  With all this blood on his hands, whether it’s to save and protect or not.  He’s too vicious. He’s too inhuman.

Besides, he has his mentor, Krolia...but he can never dare to dream that anyone, himself included, could fill the holes in her heart.

So he’s just alone.  Sitting up here, overlooking the town that he saves night after night.  Lonely.

 _This is better_ , they say, _you’re stronger because of it_.  He’s spent a lot of time pretending they’re right.  But he’s tired. He doesn’t want to go back and have to pretend it doesn’t hurt.  He goes out and fights for other people all the time, but for what? To be alone?

He wants what they have...  He wants to trade places with them, but who would want to trade with _him_?

Day turns to afternoon, which bleeds into evening, and he knows he’d better go soon before he causes any upset.

With a small sigh, he rolls forward onto the balls of his feet, hops off the roof, and climbs his way down.

This is the part he hates: he slips through the crowd.  Even though it’s evening and the crowd has thinned, even though he’s pulled his hood over his head, somehow they always recognize him.

“It’s him,” he hears - an awed whisper through the people as they part, opening the way for him carefully.  Their eyes are wide and shine as they stop what they’re doing to watch him - a rare sight. “What an honor,” some whisper.  Some fall to their knees.

He’s just Keith.  Just a boy inside still, human.  But they see him differently.

“Keith Kogane,” they say. “Our savior.  Our hero.”

“Thank you,” they say.  “Thank you for saving us.”

It used to put stars in his eyes to hear that and he’d grin toothily back, head held up high.  Sometimes, he’d follow Krolia’s lead and address the crowd in a bold firm voice, hands on his hips, feeling _powerful_ , and they’d go wild, rippling with breathless awe over him.

Now, it’s hard to even muster up a smile.  He’s just Keith. Just another person like them, with the same wants, the same needs, but no one else seems to realize.

The weight of the world is already on his shoulders.  But each time someone calls out to him, it feels like more.

 

Keith’s not in the mood to go to Kolivan’s manor, where the Blade of Marmora gather and live.  He’s hungry, sure, but this throbbing headache tells him he’ll be sick to his stomach if he eats, so he’d rather just nurse his bad mood first instead.  He got hit one too many times last night and it’s put him in a mood - that’s all this moping is. Sure.

He wants to bypass the social interaction for the night and just stew on his bed in the lighthouse, but Lance happens to be cleaning his boots off outside and catches sight of him making his way through the forest’s path.

“Heeeeey!”  Lance calls, face brightening at the sight of him.  “Where’ve you been? Krolia’s been searching for you.”

Ugh.  He knows he can’t escape without a fight.  Grudgingly, he follows.

“We thought we’d lost you there for a minute,” Lance laughs, of course not noticing Keith’s mood.  Or maybe he’s just used to it. “Earlier, we were trying to figure out if Krolia would just leave you if you ever got injured.  Like, maybe she’d just come home and not even tell any of us what happened.” He laughs at the thought. “Pidge told us we were just being assholes though.”

Keith follows Lance into the kitchen.  “ _Yup_ ,” Keith sighs.

“Aw, come on, man, I’m just kidding.  She wouldn’t leave you. Well, I mean, if it were all of us lined up and she had to choose one, she’d definitely choose you, if that helps.”

Keith sniffs bitterly.  “I don’t actually think it does.”

Hunk is there, in front of the fire with a big pot of stew and Pidge seems to be “helping”, pouring over it with a bowl in one hand and spoon in the other.  It looks like it’s almost done, so Keith thanks his lucky stars for that at least. He can watch them for awhile, sip on some water, and then leave.

“Hey, man, how’s it going?” Hunk waves a mitted hand at him when he notices him.  His smile is always so big. “You’re just in time for my super special stew - extra health this time.  Krolia told us how awesome you were last night. For that, you get _two_ bowls today.”

Keith waves a hand in front of his face.  “Not hungry.”

“Nuh-uh,” Krolia says, walking briskly into the room.  She has her arms crossed and she tilts her head toward the table.  “Sit.”

“But -”

“We have another mission tonight.  You’ll need your strength.”

He stops and gives her a careful look.  “Tonight...? But tonight is...”

She cuts him off shortly, walking around him and arching an eyebrow.  “The world doesn’t stop because of a date. Lotor gave us some info that’s too good to pass.  A house over on Greenbriar. Apparently there are almost three dozen.”

“Three dozen...?”  He takes in a deep breath, trying to quell the feeling in his stomach.  Oh, this is a bad idea. A bad, bad idea.

But she holds his gaze firmly.  He can see the dare in her eyes: _fight me_ _and see what happens_.

He’s quiet.  He sighs and presses his lips tightly together.  “Fine,” he says. He takes a seat, watching Hunk do his thing, who smiles encouragingly at him.

Lance leans forward on the table and asks Krolia,  “Hey, can we come this time? The more the merrier, right?  It shouldn’t just be the two of you. And besides, Keith’s been helping me practice.  He said I was good with a bow. Didn’t you, Keith?”

Krolia completely ignores him, walking straight past and looking into the big pot Hunk is adding his finishing touches to.

She’s playing it cool.  She’s pretending she’s in control, but Keith knows her.  He knows she’s not. He can see the way her muscles are tense in her back, how her words are sharper than usual.

“Lance _has_ been practicing,” Keith says to Krolia.  “We could use more of us.”

“Absolutely not,” she hums, taking a spoonful of stew from the pot.  “This is good, Hunk.”

Hunk beams.  “Thank you, Krolia.”

Keith sighs, stepping from his seat and leaning against the counter in front of her.  She raises her eyebrows at him and crosses her arms. Everyone else goes silent as their presence presses through the air.

Keith says as rationally as he can, “Krolia, we just had a mission last night and with Kolivan and the others out...we could _use more of us_ ,” he presses, throwing weight into the implication.  “Pidge and Hunk are great alchemists. Lance is... _decent_ with a bow.  They can just stay out of the way and act as support; they won’t hinder our movement.”

She glares right into him so hard that it burns.  “I told you to come home and rest today. I don’t know where you’re always running off to, but it’s not my fault if you’re tired because you didn’t listen to me.”

He knows she won’t be happy if he says it out loud, so he tilts his head and gives her a look.   _It’s not me I’m worried about_ , he stares.

They hold each other’s sharp glances.

“Fine,” she says eventually.  “You’re right.”

Lance woops.  Pidge and Hunk clap hands, saying _alright_ at the same time.  “But if anything happens to them, I want you to deal with it.”

“Okay,” he holds his hands up in surrender, watching her sigh her way upstairs.

Despite her nagging Keith about it, she didn’t even eat herself.  Keith grudgingly sits back in his seat, rubbing at his face.

God.  He’s ready for this bullshit night to end already.  He definitely can’t say it aloud, but it’s her he’s afraid he’ll have to deal with.

 

It’s dark out.  Quiet. Keith can hear the beating of his own heart, slow and steady as he takes in a breath.  One... Two...

“Did you double check the vials?”  Krolia murmurs beside him.

He sighs.  Clears his throat.  “...Yeah,” he says.

He goes back to counting.  One... Two...  Three...

It’s so quiet...until the leaves rustle in the distance.  Krolia tsks loudly. “...McClain...”

“He’s good with a bow,” he reminds her gently.

“He’s _good_ at making enough noise to have us all killed.”

And that’s true, so Keith doesn’t say anything back.  He leans his head against the tree. Looks up at the moon and waits.  Waits. Waits.

He leans his head forward and stretches out the back of his neck.  “Are you sure Lotor wasn’t lying...?”

He can see Krolia’s eyes flashing as she shifts in the dark.  The moon is high in the sky, having curved up and now on its way back down.  “Keith. I understand how you feel about Lotor, but we all want the same things.  He has no reason to lie.”

“I don’t know.  It just seems like...there are a strange amount of problematic vampires around all the time.  Our last home wasn’t like this.”

“They’re newborns.  They don’t know what they’re doing.  They turn and turn and turn and the ones they turn will turn others...it’s a mess.  You know this Keith, why am I having to explain his to you? It’s good news for us; they’ll be easy targets.”

“But if they’re newborns, shouldn’t they be starving?”  Keith sighs. “So where are they?”

“Yes.  And that’s why you also have to be careful.”

“I know.”

“Then you should also know you need to be silent and _wait_.”

He _knows_.  He stays standing, just as he’s done these past few hours, staring up at the moon.  It’s big today. Quiet. Watching back. He grits his teeth antsily and frowns.

“...I’m sorry,” Krolia says lowly.  “I’m tense today.”

“...Yeah.  Me too. I’ve had a headache all day.”

“Did you remember your medication?”  Krolia murmurs, looking over at him in concern.

“ _Yes_.”

“Are you sure?  ...I know how you like to procrastinate and I think, especially when we have fights back-to-back, you tend to let other things slip.”

Keith lets out a long low sigh.  “I took the medication, okay? I always do.  I’m not a child anymore.”

“I know,” she says.  “I know you’re not. But -”

“- Worry about the others; they’re the ones who mess up.  Not - me.”

She sighs but doesn’t say anything back.

And finally, _finally_ , they hear the door to the back of the house creak open quietly.  Hear the soft hesitant footsteps touch down onto the ground.

“Remember,” Krolia whispers.  “They’re not human anymore. They died the moment they were changed.”

“I _know_.”

“...They wear masks of fear.  Masks of pain. But they’re not like us.  They can’t love like us. They’re fake imitations.  They’re trying to prey on our weaknesses; that’s why we must not have them..”

“Krolia,” Keith sighs.  “I know. You’ve told me a million times.”

“I know you know,” she whispers.  “But I just... Today... I -”

“They’re _coming_ ,” Keith grits between teeth, body tensing.

She pushes back whatever she was going to say and focuses.  He can see her eyes sharpening, her posture tightening, and he lets himself breathe a sigh of relief.

He knows what day it is and he’s been worried.  She’s particularly susceptible. It’s why he’s trying his best to respond patiently to her twenty million worries.  She’s not usually like this. Today is special. Today is the twentieth anniversary of the day her husband and son were killed by vampires.

And it’s why she fights so mercilessly now, stepping out from the shadows and into the moonlight, like the grim reaper hunting for overdue souls.

Keith gets it.  He watches her dart from the cover of the trees and unsheath her knife.  Watches as she swings it up and hard, slicing off the head of the vampire nearest.  She doesn’t hesitate to give them time to plead. She doesn’t hold back in the face of a “child”.  They’re vampires. They’re monsters.

Keith _gets it_.  They took his family from him too.

“They’re all the same,” she’s told him since before he can remember.  “They act like they’re different and then they turn on you. I learned that the hard way...just like your parents...  Don’t find out the hard way, Keith. Be smart, like I know you are. To trust a vampire is to forfeit your life.”

“ _I know_ ,” he says.  He does.

“Don’t die,” she whispers.

“I know...”

She doesn’t need to worry.  Every lunge, every tear, every bite that they try, Keith has a counter for that.  He has been perfectly disposed to Krolia and Kolivan’s teachings from the beginning.  He is their perfect weapon.

He isn’t Krolia’s equal, but he’s one of the best.  He stays at her side, at the front, hacking through them as if they’re nothing.

The fight is easy and mindless.  He’s done this so many times before that it’s automatic by now.  Their blood doesn’t spurt like a human’s, but it gets everywhere.  He’s used to the smell of blood.

Familiar.  Almost calming because of how commonplace in his life it is.  ...Is this what home means?

A newborn tries to take a chunk out of his shoulder and he steps carefully out of the way like it’s nothing and jams his blade through its skull, tossing it aside, moving on as it twitches behind him.

Newborns are disgusting.  Keith always thinks it. Ravenous with hunger, almost manic.  Keith doesn’t even have to pretend they’re monsters; their appearance is obvious enough.  Their humanity is gone.

He steps forward at the next one that approaches but intuition pulls at his gut and he turns.

“Hey!”  Keith cries when he sees an arrow whizz by and he has to fall back at the last second.  It lands with a loud thunk into a vampire through the forehead. Keith twists, frowning at Lance on the side.  “What the _hell_ are you doing?  Why are you so close?  Krolia told you to stay back!”

“I...  I’m sorry, it just looked like you needed help!”  Lance shrugs, like this makes sense in some world.

“ _Go.  Back_.  To position!  Jesus.”

“Well, I just -”

Keith doesn’t have time for this.  There are three on him, so he turns from Lance to deal with them.  They’re sloppy; so sloppy. New and _stupid_.

But Keith is well-trained while others are...not so much.  He hears a garbled yell from behind him and his gut fills with dread.  He turns his sharp eyes around and sees Lance beneath one.

“ _Goddammit_ ,” Keith curses, running forward and cutting his blade across its neck, watching as its head lops right off.

“I...  Sorry,” Lance says, but he’s panting, face white.  Keith stares down and bites back an exasperated groan.  Lance has been bitten. It’s not much - he’s only bleeding a little - but Lance clings to it tightly, eyes as afraid as the irritation in Keith’s gut.

Great...  He didn’t listen.  Keith can already see Krolia’s responding expression in his head.

“Right,” Keith tries to say as patiently as he can, even though _I fucking told you_ is what’s really on his tongue.  Lance isn’t in any real sort of danger, but Keith knows it’s painful.

“Am I - Am I going to turn?  Will you have to kill me?”

“No,” Keith sighs, rubbing at his forehead as he helps Lance up.  “You have to bite and be bitten, remember? If you didn’t drink their blood, you’ll be fine.  You’ll hardly need any of the antidote.”

“I’m sorry,” Lance breathes, the hysteria still there in his eyes.  “I’m sorry.”

The wind is blowing and the vampires are starting to get whiff of Lance’s blood.  Their attention is turning from Krolia and the others and turning toward them.

Not good.    

And the blood all over Lance, warm and abundant enough to attract attention....what a fucking nightmare.  Even though Hunk and Pidge have noticed and are racing to cut them off, they can’t handle all of them at once.

Maybe it would’ve just been better if Keith and Krolia had gone alone.

Keith tsks, repositioning his knife and digging it across the inside of his arm, watching at the blood that gushes out.  Overkill. That should be more than Lance’s wound. He watches as the tide turns toward him.

“Keith!”  Pidge screeches as she stops beside them.  “What’d you do that for?!”

“Why do you think?” he mutters.  “Take care of Lance. I’ll get Krolia.”

But Lance is already crumpling, falling into Pidge’s worried arms, chest heaving.  The whites of his eyes are swallowing his face. He’s scared. Venom feels like acid in the veins.

Keith pushes past a vampire that runs at him and jabs it through without sparing it much of a glance.  “Krolia!” He calls, making his way through the wreckage toward her. He drives his blade up one’s chest and into its heart.  Twists his blade through one’s temple. Impales two together at once. It’s a slow process. “ _Krolia_.”

But she can’t hear him.  She’s too involved. Teeth bared, rage burning in her eyes.   _Focus_ , she always tells him, and then, on this day, she lets it consume her.

“ _Krolia_!”  He yells and groans as she sprints off into the back of the house, no doubt seeking out the cause of all these newborns.

“Keith,” Pidge calls. “Keith, don’t go in there.  Are you crazy?”

He grits his teeth, assessing his choices.

“Go back!”  Keith calls, waving them away.  “I’ve got this. We’ll be fine.”

“But _Keith_ -!”

The crowd is thinned and they all have eyes on him.  Or his arm, rather, but that’s where he wants their attention.  With one last wave to Pidge’s incredulous face, he turns and runs inside, leading them away.

It’s like a normal house.  Vampires like to pretend like that.  Like they’re just one of the people. Too bad they can’t touch sunlight or they’ll literally burn to death, otherwise maybe they’d really be able to stay living among them.  Keith’s glad for that at least.

“Krolia!”  He calls, stepping over the carnage.  There’s blood everywhere. Bodies. She’s working fast today.

The few that follow behind him he takes care of easily.  He then runs up the stairs.

He’s irritated.  That headache that had sprouted earlier in the day is now spiking down his spine and into his eyes.  He cringes through it, mood black. He knew today was a bad idea, but she wouldn’t _listen_ to him.  She still isn’t.

“I’m not affected,” she had said.  “That was years ago. Wounds heal.”

But now look.  She’s nowhere to be seen.

“Lance is _hurt_ ,” Keith cries.  “We need to get him out of here!”

And just as he says that, the closet door bursts open and a figure comes flying out, knocking him hard against the wall.  His head cracks against a picture frame and the glass shatters. He grunts, his knife flying from his hands.

Ugh, their teeth are so sharp.  He can see them glinting, inches away from his face and he struggles against it, holding it tightly by the neck with one hand as it tries to strangle him with its own.  Strangling’s okay. He just can’t get bitten or that’s going to fucking hurt.

This one is _strong_.  He grits his teeth, reaching for the vial on his waist, but his arm is twinging in pain.  He can’t quite reach it -

A knife whizzes through the air and thunks into its temple.  It falls to the floor in a heap.

“Dammit, Keith,” Krolia hisses, hurrying forward to rip her knife from its head.  “I always tell you not to follow in tight places - it’s not _safe_.”  Her eyes fall to the wound on his arm and she stops in her tracks.  Her expression goes funny. “You’re hurt.”

Keith rubs at his neck in irritation, sighing.  “I’m fine. I did it myself. I’ve been calling you since you were outside. Lance got bitten.  I had to lead them away. I told the others to go back; it’s just us now.”

He can see the incredulous look building in her eyes so he tries to make her see reason: “You weren’t _listening_.  Lance couldn’t even stand; you know how quickly the venom can start tearing people apart.  I had to think quickly or he’d be killed. We were almost done. I -”

She says lowly, face going dark.  “You forget yourself. _I’m_ in command.  You’re just a _child_.”

“Then act like a leader,” Keith hisses.  “Lance needed you and where were you?”

“I told you Lance was a bad idea to bring but you _insisted_.”

“Krolia, I don’t want to argue with you.  We’re both not at our best today. ...Let’s just go back.”

She turns from him, bitterness on her lips.  “One got away. It ran out this way. A redhead.  Did you see it?”

“No.  Are you sure it’s not part of the carnage?”  He grunts, tossing a hand out to the bodies in the hallway.  He’ll never understand why the vampires in this town have such a need to make so many more of their kind.  For what purpose? These ones looked scared; like they had no idea what was even happening. “Why do you think there are so many in this town...?”  Keith mutters. “We’ve never seen anything like this before.”

She looks down at all of them with hatred in her eyes.  Disgust. “I don’t know. It’s unusual. If we keep hunting them, we’ll figure it out eventually.

“...There it is,” she murmurs lowly, spotting her vampire.  “Looks like I did get it.”

It's poisoned, laying in a boneless heap over the rest of them, its eyes rolled back into its head and foam leaking from its mouth.  It makes a small choked gurgle in the back of its throat.

Keith watches Krolia’s face mutely as she walks over to it, the shadows arching over her as she stares into its contorted jerking face.  There’s so much hatred in her eyes. And there’s more than that. Keith can see it boiling. Hurting her. She lifts her foot and stomps down, snuffing the sound out as she crushes its head in.  The gurgling stops, but she does it again. And again. Keith can hear the bones give way beneath the force of her hatred. The splintering. The squishing of blood and marred tissue and -

“Krolia...”  Keith says gently, reaching a careful hand forward.  “Krolia, come on, it’s done. Today’s a shitty day... Your head’s not clear...”

Her eyes flash as she whips her face to him.  He thinks she might start yelling. But she holds it, turning her gaze from him and looking down to the floor.  Her jaw clicks to a close as she lets her eyes dim over the now-headless vampire at her feet.

“You’re right,” she whispers.  She’s trembling, but she won’t let him see her face.  “You’re right...” The hallway is filled with spent bodies.  But it won’t be that way for long if they don’t burn them. They have to take care of it.

“Krolia,” he sighs, closing his eyes shut for a moment and rubbing his temples.  “I’ll do it.”

“No, I’m fine.  I can keep going.”

“ _No_ , you’re not fine.”  He stares her down and just says the facts: “you’re not fine.”

She nods, movement slow and bitter.  “Right. Fine. Since _you’re_ in charge now.  Since my head’s not clear enough.”  As she walks through the hall, her eyes catch on something on the floor.  She bends down, grabs his fallen knife and twirls it in her hands, giving him a _look_.  She tosses it to him.  “You dropped something.”

He raises his eyebrows at her but watches her leave.

She’s not usually like this.  Usually, she’s calm and collected.  A good warrior in so many ways. A good person.

He knows today is always hard on her.  It’s been years though; why does she have to torture herself like this?

He knows she’s deemed the place safe if she’s leaving him alone.  He groans as he takes a look at the forms all over the damn place.  This is going to take forever by himself, but he knows it’s work that needs to be done.  Vampires are so resilient. The possibilities of them surviving with a knife through their heads are disturbingly high.

He walks into the room she came from - just a regular bedroom with a regular bed.  Bodies littering the ground, occupying the bed like they were just sleeping. Like they were just like humans.

He used to feel sick at sights like these, no matter his youthful enthusiasm.  Vampires look so much like people, it’s hard not to empathize. They were just sleeping soundly in their beds one moment and then, the next, a knife's cutting across their throat.

Well, this is for the good of the people...  Keith sighs and grabs them, heaving them up onto his back and dragging them across the room to throw them out the window.  He tries to make sure their nasty teeth are out of his face. He’s done this so many times before he finds his thoughts drifting off at the dull monotony of it all.

Nearly an hour later, the bodies are collected.  He grabs a vial from his waist and uncorks it, tossing the liquid over them as evenly as he can, and then he lights a match and tosses it.  Looks on as the fire sparks and ignites. He walks back onto a log and sits there wearily, watching the fire twist into the sky.

The sky is starting to warm with morning’s honey hues.  God, he’s lucky he’s a night owl or he’d really be suffering tonight.  They all waited inside the house for so long. It’s like they were worried.  Hesitant. He worries about where Krolia got her information from. Lotor’s from a different faction, and though they’ve never _technically_ had problems with him, tensions are often high between the two of them.  But Keith would not consider him a loyal ally. Keith suspects the only reason Lotor is still somewhat manageable is probably because of Allura, but she’s never around anymore.

But it’s fine, he guesses.  The vampires’ bodies are gone now, the pile dwindling down as their soulless hard corpses melt away.

They won’t be getting up after this, charred as they are, so, content, he calls it a night.

He pulls himself to his feet, brushing the dust off his pants and rubbing his sore eyes.  He turns back. Really, they could’ve just left the bodies that were outside. The morning’s here, peeking up over the mountains in the distance, slowly climbing its way up the hill and through the trees.  That’d burn them on contact, slowly, painfully. Keith feels no remorse for them.

He starts his walk back.

For how much he feels lonely, for how often he thinks he wants to be part of a family, he finds himself enjoying the night’s solitude.  It suits him, like a perfectly fitted outfit. It just feels right sometimes. So why does he feel so alone other times? He wishes his head would make up its own damn mind.

There’s a sound in the bushes.  Keith blinks himself from his thoughts and looks up.

He takes a step back in the direction of the sound, readying his hand to his blade, but he doesn’t see or sense anything anywhere.

A rabbit, maybe...?  Keith is doubtful. He pushes deeper into the woods again.  The light’s about to come up and there won’t be much time to seek cover, so it’s really a moot point going back, but Keith likes to be thorough.  Letting one go just because he assumes the sun will get it instead just seems like a half-assed job.

And there, he sees it.

It’s standing in the clearing, gazing out toward the horizon, a lone figure in the forest.  It’s pressing its hand to its face, right above its nose, where blood oozes down. Neon purple veins spreading out from it.

There’s something about its stance, about its presence that makes Keith pause.  It’s looking toward the sun. It has to hurt, but it isn’t running. It’s like it’s waiting for something, something it doesn’t expect to come.

The scene is so lonely.  The last vampire of so many, singled out and waiting by itself for a death it doesn’t fear.

And then, it turns just slightly, eyes dim and feverish with pain and poison, when it catches sight of Keith and startles.

It drops its hand, the horizon line starting to catch fire behind it, outlining it with gold.  It winces just slightly as its skin begins to burn and redden.

Despite that, its voice is still gentle, no hint of bitterness or malice in it.  “...Have you come to collect me?”

“What?”  Keith breathes and distantly, he realizes what he’s doing: he’s hesitating.  And Krolia’s always warned him about this. Part of his head is flagging red with alarms, reminding him that vampires do this all the time - they use compulsion as a weapon and he’s falling victim.  The other part of him, the part he’s in right now, just stares at the sight before him, taking him in.

The vampire is beautiful.

It lets out a small shaky sigh.  “Please...” It whispers. “ _Please..._ do it.”

A vampire has never begged him before.  Not for this. Against it, definitely, but...  But _for_?

Keith just stares.  It’s not even running from the sun.

But then, jerked out of his thoughts, Keith senses pull him back to his body.  He feels something behind him. Sees the vampire’s eyes in front of him go wide.

Another vampire is behind him - standing - huge boulder in both hands raised above its head.

Keith ducks quickly, slipping out of the way as the boulder falls, hitting the ground right where he stood with a loud bang.  His knife catches on a tree nearby and falls from his hand and Keith tsks as he realizes he can’t save his grip.

New plan.  Keith grabs the vial from his waist and uncaps it all at the same time, tossing it at the vampire.  It hisses upon contact, screeching as it graps for its skin.

That’s usually the end of it, but apparently, with the sun out and already blistering boils onto its skin, it doesn’t have much else to lose.  Instead of falling back, like Keith expects it to, it lurches forward, tossing itself and all its heavy weight at Keith. It’s manic in its pain, trying to sink its sharp pointed teeth into Keith’s neck as it tosses and pins Keith onto his back.

He struggles in the dirt, especially as the wind is knocked out of him.  This damn vampire. Keith can see the arrow sticking out of its back. _Lance_.  God.  Keith curses himself for ever thinking they could rely on the others for help.

Keith’s been sloppy tonight worrying about the date, the anniversary.  He should’ve just focused on the mission from the beginning, but no. Now, he’s alone, in this position, no one to save him. That’s what he thinks.

But then a familiar purple knife comes out of nowhere, jamming down into the vampires skull.  Its eyes fly wide and it just stays there for a moment, teetering in the air above Keith. As the light fades from its eyes, it falls down in one defeated heap, inches from the sun.

The sun rolls up the ground, flitting through the leaves as they blow around in the breeze.  As light rises across the ground, it grabs at the vampire, absorbs it, and then burns it away

It’s Keith’s knife stuck in its skull.  The one that he’d accidentally dropped.

The one who helped him is still there, standing beside him, hand still formed into a clenched fist.

Shakily, it reaches down and slips the knife from the other vampire’s skull.  It stares at the red on the blade like it’s never seen blood before in its life.

Keith turns to his savior, eyes wide.

 _Maybe it’s human,_ Keith thinks for a moment, but no.  No... No human could be this heartbreakingly beautiful, this close to perfection that it fucks with your head.

It’s a vampire, plain and simple.  A vampire that saved Keith.

 _They’re lying_ .  Keith has always believed it.  It’s the _code_ .  It’s the way things _are_ .   _They’re monsters_.

They killed Krolia’s family.  They killed _his_ family.

The vampire stares at Keith with wide innocent eyes.  “...You dropped it,” it murmurs, dazed, holding it out for Keith.  “Are you okay?”

Keith stares down at his knife in its hands, held out, shaking.  It’s offering the knife back to Keith.

 _First chance they’ll get, they’ll kill you_.

The vampire stares at Keith, has _been_ staring at Keith for who knows how long....  He’d turned his back on it. He was exposed. And it hadn’t done anything...

Instead, it’s holding Keith’s knife back out for him, staring at Keith’s face in some sort of stunned awe.

“...Are you an angel...?”  It asks Keith gently, voice winded.

It holds Keith’s baffled gaze for one more moment before the energy slips right out of it and it falls face-first into the dirt.  The knife slips from its grasp and it’s still.

Keith grabs his knife quickly and leaps up, pressing his foot into the back of its head, shoving its face into the dirt.

He’s scared for some reason and he’s not used to the feeling.  He doesn’t get it. He doesn’t get what this is and that’s something Keith can’t handle.  He _always_ gets vampires.  He knows how to kill them, he knows their game.  So what the fuck is this?

“You can’t run,” Keith tells it, but it doesn’t say anything, just trembles with sickness, too far gone.  “Do you hear me?!”

It grits its teeth and just breathes.

He watches its resigned expression.  It doesn’t look like it’s trying to fight.  Keith turns his eyes around the forest, convinced that there’s something else waiting for him.  A trick. An ambush. Something.

But the forest is as still as ever.  There’s no one but the two of them.

Its time is running out.  A few more moments and the sun will take it instead and that’s one of the worst ways to go.

Keith grits his teeth.  “Don’t fight and I’ll make it quick.”

Keith has the knife in his hand.  He can stab it through. He can do it.  It’ll be over in less than a second.

 _Just put it out of its misery_ , Keith commands himself.   _Do it!_

But his heart is still thumping uncomfortably in his chest as he watches it.  An anomaly.

His hand trembles on the knife.  He can't move.

“What’s your game?”  He breathes out a small laugh as he leans forward to see its face.  It forces open dazed eyes. Roughly, Keith tosses it onto its back, hissing lowly with as much venom as he can muster into his face, “think you can trick me?”

It just stares back at Keith, no fear in its eyes.  There’s...wonder there. Awe, like it's seeing something beautiful, like it can witness the stars plastered across Keith’s face.

 _Masks_ , Krolia always says.

“An angel...?”  It breathes.

Its words, the tender way it says it, all of it feels like a punch to Keith’s gut somehow.  He’s more winded than during battle.

“What are you playing at?”  Keith growls again, but his voice breaks.  It’s just fucking with him, that’s it. It knows how to best Keith and it’s doing it.

 _Kill it!_ part of Keith screams, before he falls prey to its mind games.

Tears build in its eyes, as bright and lonely as moonlight, and Keith jerks back as if burned.

This...this doesn’t feel right.  It confuses Keith. He has a bullshit detector and it’s pretty good.  Growing up without parents will give you that. And this vampire is...it’s completely genuine.

Keith had made a vow with the other Blades to care for the innocent, to protect those who couldn’t protect themselves.  Keith pushes back _hard_ when pushed, but this...?  Hurting the weak? This vampire is _crying_.  Genuine, hurt tears.  Not for its own wounds...there’s something in its eyes.  Like it’s mourning something good.

Keith stares down at it and all its twisted up sorrow and he feels like, somehow, he understands its loneliness.

Keith is supposed to protect the innocent...and this vampire feels like the epitome of all that innocence is.

Keith can’t kill that light.

He can’t do it.  This vampire is still staring up at him as no one else has stared at him in his entire life.  He feels something...something vulnerable and scared and _new_ in his chest and he wonders...he wonders what it means.

Keith pulls himself to his feet.  Is he shaking? He looks down at his hands, almost as upset with himself as much as he is with the situation.  These _emotions_ welling up...why?

The sun is rolling in.  Keith stares up into it.

“...The sunlight will have you,” he whispers to it, ignoring the way his voice shakes with uncertainty.  “I would tell you to pray,” he murmurs, “but you don’t have a soul.”

It looks over at him, delirious with pain.  And as it looks at Keith, it calms. “...An angel...”  It whispers before passing out cold.

Keith stares down at it.

The sun approaches, creeping up toward this creature’s feet.  Closer. Closer.

He doesn’t understand what comes over him.  It’s like a sickness or something, infecting his mind with something foreign, something not him.  He doesn’t even mean to move, but he starts to anyway, reaching out a hesitant hand. He runs his fingers gently over the poison-laced cut on its nose, looks down at the way its body clenches tightly in pain.

Why did this one save his life...?  Why did it look like that as it faced death?

The sun cuts across the bottom of the vampire’s skin, and blisters form there immediately, angry and red.  The skin hisses and the smell of flesh fills the air.

Keith frowns up into the sunlight, then looks back down at this vampire’s gentle soft face.  It’s now or never.

He closes his eyes.  Tries to hear the words in his head to talk himself out of it, but his mind is quiet for once.  There’s just silence. That seems like a decision somehow.

He reaches out for the vampire and grabs it, tossing it over his back.

He can’t just snuff this mystery out now.  He...he needs to figure out what this all means.  That’s all. And when he does, he can kill it, like he knows he’s supposed to.

Because they’re all liars.  All monsters wearing masks. He knows that.  He’s always known that. They’ve taken everything from him, from his friends.  He’ll just be careful until he figures this all out.

He spends the rest of the way home keeping to the shadows, staying out of the early morning’s bright light.

He manages it the entire way there. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi. So 2017's SBB is one of the main things that initially got me into this fandom. I had never heard of a Big Bang before ever, so I was like, WOW, WHAT ARE ALL THESE FICS BEING POSTED EVERYDAY?? It was like the stars were showering down on me, haha. Such GREAT long fics accompanied by ART?!! ...Oh man. Heavensent. I KNEW...right when I finally figured out what it was, that I needed to be part of the next one.
> 
> I wanted to challenge myself with it. I wanted to give myself a lot of time to work with it and change it into something I could be proud of..........and then I got caught up writing WTLDR and, though I've had this outlined since like March, I literally saved myself one (1) O N E month to write this (to put it in perspective, WTLDR took me seven months from beginning to end). I AM SUCH A FOOL. FORGIVE ME, SBB GODS. I really struggled with this, scrambling trying to write it AND edit it in one month...it was just...so much. I burnt myself out in a major way, haha. But I hope you enjoy it anyway, haha.
> 
> You can find my twitter [here!](https://twitter.com/go__begreat)


	2. Chapter 2

They live in the outskirts of town.  And by outskirts, Keith means far far away, which is kind of a pain.  He feels like a hermit but with purpose; the purpose being the townspeople would be way too irritating and distracting if the Blade of Marmora were always easily accessible.  Here, it’s an unspoken statement of their need for privacy, and the townspeople thankfully respect that. It feels like this realm of the forest is haunted for how quiet it always is.  Very rarely does anyone come through here - the exception maybe being the stray kids daring each other to get close to the manor’s gates. They keep a five foot distance and touch the gate with a stick before squealing and running off.  But no one approaches Keith’s light house. There’s something intimidating about it, always hidden away by the foam of the ocean, standing atop a hill, bold and sturdy as you look up to it, part of the sky.

But then again, none of the Blades come here either.  Maybe it’s just gross and old.

Keith repositions the vampire’s weight on his back and pokes his head around the trees, making sure the manor that’s closeby doesn’t have anyone hanging around outside.  The front yard seems to be empty.

Keith runs across the open rocky cliffside and opens the lighthouse’s door.  He climbs the staircase and makes his way to the attic, then shuts the door behind him, letting out a heavy sigh.

His room.  Old, musty, and the floors squeak like nothing else, but it’s _his_.  Pidge, Lance, and Hunk all have homes in the town with their families; this is what Keith’s got - an abandoned lighthouse near the Blade of Marmora’s base.  It’s conveniently placed, but kind of sad. The Blade of Marmora gathers in the manor most days, and some do stay for extended periods of time, but Keith’s the only one who was raised like this.

No one usually visits the attic room unless something is wrong.  They’re safe here. It’s large and spacious and though it’s cluttered, it somehow always manages to feel empty too.  In his years of trying to fill the holes in his heart, he’s collected many things in hopes they’d do the trick - trinkets from the places he’s visited, gifts from the people he’s saved - he keeps it all.  Mostly he’s hoarded books; he’s jammed them into the walls on shelves upon shelves. So many that they just look like wallpaper. History, art, medical, alchemy, fantasy, non-fiction. All of it. Any of it.

There’s a raised platform with a table at the end, beneath a window that lets light pour it.  He keeps his alchemy set there though he’s not very good himself. He doesn’t know what else to do with the space, so it’s fine.

But the important part is where he’ll keep the vampire.  Beneath the platform, down the little groove of stairs, nestles a small pocket that he supposes can be considered a room, like a cupboard beneath a staircase, only wider, taller.  He thinks it’s probably where storage was supposed to go, but he likes it, it’s cozy, so it’s where he keeps his bed.

He pulls the curtain away - which is really just an old sheet pinned to the wood above - and finally, sets the vampire down.

He pulls the curtain back over the door to hide it away from the light.  He finds a match and lights the candelabra by the bed stand. And he stands there.  Stares down his nose at it.

Keith knows vampires sleep during the day, but it just looks so...still.  Its chest doesn’t expand and contract. It doesn’t flinch or change. It’s just...  It looks already dead.

Is it?

Keith kneels down beside it, flinching a little when he feels the pull in his arm.  He reaches his hand out carefully, pressing his fingers to its temple.

Cold.  Like ice.  Sturdy. There are burn marks there, painful looking.

“Hello?”  Keith whispers softly, tilting his head to see it from a different angle.  “Are you...?” The words ‘alive’ hang on his lips and he lets them fade. Even when vampires are awake, they are not alive.

It shifts a little beneath his touch, drawing up toward Keith’s warmth.  Keith retracts his fingers and crosses his arms over his knees.

Not totally dead then.  But it’s day and the need for sleep in vampires is stronger than it is for humans, especially newborns.  This one had definitely looked confused enough to be just that. Keith won’t get anywhere like this.

He heaves himself to his feet, pinches out the flame, and presses through the sheet at the door.  He looks at the bookcase nearby and walks to it, pushing his weight into its side until it slides across the floor and over the door, barring the vampire inside.

He’s not foolish enough to believe that this will keep the vampire inside if it wants to get out.  If it decides to rebel, like he knows them to, then Keith will be in so much shit.

Really, he should just kill the vampire and be done with it.  No one would have to know he had a moment of weakness and brought his _enemy_ into his one and only _living space_.

He could just...stab through its heart in its sleep.  It doesn’t take a stake; Keith’s knife’s been blessed.  It’ll do.

His eyes slip up to the alchemy table, the cupboards stuffed with all the herbs he could ever need.  In this case: garlic and wild roses. They’re dried, but still potent. He could even use the potions Pidge and Allura made him.  There are so many options, and with the vampire asleep, it wouldn’t even have to know or feel pain. It’d go peacefully. Keith wouldn’t have to feel guilt.

His back is to the bookcase barring the vampire in.  He’s only a few feet away. It would be quick. It would be easy.

Keith’s heart is still off beat from when the vampire first turned to him, first addressed him...as an angel.  That look in his eyes as he took in Keith’s face. The wonder... Like Keith was something _more_ than what he actually is.  Like maybe Keith wasn’t a killer.

He steps away, putting distance between him and the vampire in hopes some distance will give him the perspective he needs.

He doesn’t want to do it - he’s dead tired - but he’s got to report in to Krolia or she may just be angry enough that she _will_ come to check on him and he wants to avoid that at all costs.

He changes out of his outfit and puts on something more casual, frowning at the way his arm is caked in dried blood.  He turns back toward his room, watching, waiting, listening. But there’s only silence. Softly, he turns to the door and leaves.

He walks across the sandy cliff, cringing irritably at the thick ocean spray pouring through the air and right at him.  He hasn’t even made it to the manor and he already regrets it; the sound of Lance’s moaning getting louder the closer he gets to the main room.

In the entrance hall, he’s almost tempted to just go the other way and dig through the kitchen instead, when he sees Krolia catch sight of him.

“Keith,” she says, nodding him toward her.

Ugh.  And here’s the lecture.  How does she always know where he is at all times?

Wearily, he turns from his path toward the kitchen and leans against the entryway toward the main room.  It’s always cold in this house, in this forest bordering the moody ocean, so the fireplace is nearly almost on, kindling away happily.  It warms the room with orange, dancing across all their faces.

Lance is laid out on the main couch, groaning dramatically.  His mother is here, kneeling beside him, brushing the hair away from his gross sweaty forehead and cooing softly to him.

“It’s okay, baby,” she tells Lance in a gentle soothing voice, looking down at his face with love in her eyes.  There’s a little bit of pain there, but mostly relief because Lance will be alright.

“H-hey,” Lance says weakly when he sees Keith.  His smile joins the pain in his eyes as he reaches his hand out for Keith and gives him a thumbs up.  “Thanks for saving me out there.”

Lance’s mom turns to him, tears in her eyes and gratitude.  “ _Keith_ ,” she whispers.  “Keith, thank you for saving him.  Thank you for saving my son.”

 _Thank you for saving my son_ , she says.  The words are like light in her mouth, like what she really means is _Thank you for saving my entire world_.

His stomach tugs uncomfortably.  He feels that hole in his chest open a little bit more.

He puts on a smile, nodding a bit.  “Of course,” he says.

Pidge and Hunk are in the corner, hunching over the table they use to concoct potions.  “Keith, are you good?” Hunk asks, turning a quick eye to him to assess him, to see if he needs to make anymore potions than they’ve already got on their plates with Lance.

“I’m not hurt.”

His eyes slip back over to Lance and his mom, who is draped over his chest for how fierce her hug is.  She’s crying again, thanking the heavens beneath her breath. “I love you,” she says. “Be more careful. I can’t lose you.”

What would that be like, Keith wonders.

“You have family, Keith,” Pidge insisted to him once, months ago, maybe years.  She nodded to Krolia and gave him a little smile. “You have each other.”

In a way, maybe.  But he sees the way she fights and kills, sharp and angry, bitter with grief that’s still with her, even after all these years, and it makes him feel lonelier each time.  Perhaps they’ve found a bit of a kindred spirit in each other, but it’s not the same. She fights because she longs for the love that she once had. Keith fights because of the absence of it.

But, he supposes, they’re both fighting for revenge.  What would it be like to fight from the heart? For _someone_.

“Keith, come here,” Krolia says from behind him, cutting through his focus.  “I need to talk to you about tonight.”

Everyone looks back at him, sympathy in their eyes.

He sighs and follows her out, hand on his hips.

She leads him outside, down the steps and across the lawn.  She turns and leans against a tree. He can see the lighthouse from here, through the clearing, and he wants nothing more than to just give Krolia a wave and then walk back up the hill, toss himself onto the rug at the doorway, and finally _sleep_.  It must show on his face.  Her gaze is so intense today.

“Look, I’m sorry,” he sighs as he rubs a hand through his hair.  “I know what you’re going to say and I agree with you. I was out of line.”

She watches his face for a moment, arms crossed.  She tilts her nose up as she inspects him. “No,” she says eventually, sighing softly.  “I wasn't going to say any of that. I was going to ask how everything went after I left.”

It seems like an odd thing to ask.  Specific. Panic strikes through him and his eyes flicker up to the lighthouse, where he knows that vampire must still be.  He quickly tries to wrangle the fear down. She doesn’t know. He’s got to keep his cool. “...It was fine.”

She nods absently.  “Keith, I didn’t bring you out here to lecture you.  I wanted to apologize for my behavior. You did the right thing earlier.  I wasn’t in my best state and despite your warnings, I led you all out there anyway.  I should’ve listened to you. You’re a worthy companion in battle. And when everything went wrong, I wasn't there...and you were.  It could’ve gone a lot worse if you hadn’t stepped in.”

He blinks in surprise.  “Oh. ...Thanks.”

She smiles slightly.  “You’ve really grown, Keith.  And it’s been my honor to be your mentor all this time.  When Kolivan comes back tonight, when he asks for a report, I’m going to tell him I think you’re fit to start leading your own team.”

He blinks again.  “...What?”

“I think you’re ready.  ...Don’t you? You led the team.  ...You led me. Even when I was being unreasonable, you handled it.  You’re one of the only few Kolivan and I trust wholly. We know we can rely on you.  I’m proud of you, Keith.”

He shifts his feet, looking out at the lighthouse again.  He should be happy. Any other day, he'd be elated to hear this from Krolia; he's always looked up to her.  But right now, he just feels guilt in his gut as he thinks of what he brought home. He feels small suddenly. Like a child trying to sneak a pet cat into their home, only a vampire is not a pet.  A vampire can be deadly.

That’s not a leader.  That’s not even a good companion.  That’s a huge problem. That’s a snake.

She tilts her head, watching his expression with concern.  “What’s wrong? I thought this is what you wanted.”

He turns his eyes back to her, hoping the guilt doesn’t show on his face like it does on his heart.  “Well... Well, it was. It _is_.  ...I don’t know.  I don’t know if I feel ready.”

She chuckles lowly.  “Honestly, Keith, I think you’ve been ready for a long time.  ...I just have a hard time wanting to let you go off on your own.”

“I’m not your son.”

She presses her lips together tightly and looks down at their feet.  “...Right. I know. What do you say though? Should I tell Kolivan?”

He feels like a traitor.  “I... If that’s what you think...”

She watches him for a moment longer and then pushes herself from the tree.  “I do. Come on. Let me help you fix up your arm.”

He heaves a soul-weary sigh.  “I’m _not_ a baby, okay?  I’ve just been upgraded.  I can do it myself.”

And he can see it again: that wounded part of her surfacing.  This desperate need she has in her heart to get close, but the fear that if she does, it’ll just end up like before.  Keith has heard tales from Kolivan of how she used to be before she lost her family. How she was daring and blazing like a star.  And how now, she’s careful and quiet.

Whether it’s just because Keith happens to fit into a role of her long lost son, Krolia’s the only one who’s been there for him.  That means something to him. “Fine,” he says. “It’s really not that bad though.”

She smiles at him.

“You know,” she says, leading him back into the main room and nodding him toward the couch away from everyone.  She already has the medical kit out and she sets it on her lap as she pulls a chair up beside him. “There are other ways to gain their attention.  You don’t need to hurt yourself. That’s why we go to Allura.”

“Yeah, well, she lives so far out, I’d rather cut myself than have to trapeze through the forests and _then_ _beg_ for ten hours for some of her potions.”

Krolia hums knowingly as she unboxes the supplies.  “She likes her privacy. But seriously, Keith, stop with this.”  She dips a cloth into water and squeezes it out before gently cleaning Keith’s wound.  “One of these days, you’re going to get yourself into trouble.”

He leans his head back and watches her work.  “I’ve got this, Krolia. I’m an adult. Ready to be a leader, right?  Like you just said.”

“It doesn’t mean I can’t still look after you.”  She looks up to gauge his reaction as she pierces his skin with the needle.  He tries to keep his face even, but he can see by the sympathetic smile growing faintly on the corners of her mouth that he’s failed in hiding all the pain.  “Are you sure you don’t want that potion? I don’t know why you always insist on doing it this way. A potion would heal you better and faster than this.”

“This is fine.  Besides, what if Lance needs the potions?”

She turns a weary exasperated frown up at Lance, “The entire stock?  Though he sure does act like he’s dying enough for it...”

Keith chuckles under his breath as he watches his skin get pulled together.  He only winces a little; he’s used to this. He murmurs lowly so the others don’t hear, “You should’ve seen him when he found out he was bitten.  He asked if I was going to kill him.”

She laughs softly too, humming under her breath.  “It hardly left a mark.”

“I know.  He’s such a drama queen.”

They chuckle softly together.

“Hey,” Pidge says, approaching them, bottle in hand.  She holds it out to him. It doesn’t look like a potion, it looks like alcohol, and that he will take.  “Thanks for earlier. Your arm alright?”

He tosses his head back as he takes a drink.  “It’s fine. Krolia’s being overbearing again.”

Krolia mutters into the bloodied wound, “Let a wound fester for too long and it can cause serious detrimental effects down the road.  Why would you just leave it?”

He heaves a sigh and rolls his eyes to Pidge, who laughs.

“Seriously, though, it was cool.  I always love seeing you out in battle.  You didn’t hesitate at all. I think Lance almost fainted at the sight.”

“Don’t encourage him,” Krolia mutters.

Keith just snorts.  “Lance was supposed to be out of range of attacks.”

“He thought he saw you in trouble.”

Keith and Krolia both laugh.  “He’ll learn,” Krolia says. “But hopefully not at the expense of Keith’s arm the next time.  It’s done,” she hums, running one last look over the damage. The stitches are tight and uniform.  She did a careful job. “Get some rest. You’ve been up for far too long now.”

“Are we good on supplies?  If you need me to, I _can_ go to Allura’s.  I mean, I know I complain about it, but if it needs to be done, I can do it.”

“I already have,” Krolia says.

Keith raises his eyebrows.  “Wow. And here I thought you hated Lance.”

“Go to bed,” Krolia raises and eyebrow at him and gives him a playful pat on the shoulder.  “I’ll report back to Kolivan. Your body needs to heal. Good work out there today, Keith.”

Pidge gives him one last wave and then goes to sit.  Keith stands, stretching out his hand to test out his arm. It feels just fine.  Krolia’s still staring at it, a weird look on her face.

“You okay?”  He asks gently as he reminds himself again that it’s just the date that’s making her strange.

She nods her head, but runs her hands over her face tiredly.  She murmurs. “I’m fine. You don’t have to worry. Just...just thinking of my family.”

Keith shuffles awkwardly.  “Want to talk about it?”

She’s still giving him that weird look.  “It's just...he would be around your age.  I was just wondering how I would’ve felt if he had done what you had...  What would’ve been the right thing to do.”

“Well...” Keith tosses words around in his head in hopes he could be at least somewhat helpful.  Get her to see truths she’d avoid otherwise. “You wouldn’t have needed to worry about that... By my age, he would’ve already been dead, right?”

She turns surprised eyes on him.

He whispers.  “Everyone knows about your bloodline, Krolia...  They would’ve used him, wouldn’t they have? Lotor’s only mentioned it a million times.”

She rolls her jaw, lowering her eyes down to her hands.  “You’re right,” she says softly and Keith can see the loneliness in her eyes.  Her voice becomes rough and dark. Though she’s quiet, it becomes gritty with the power of thunder.  “I wish we could kill each one of them on the face of this planet. Strangle the life from them slowly; make them suffer as much as they’ve made each of us... I’m hoping, one day, we can.” She shakes her head, biting at her lip.  “I was stupid today. ...I’m glad you were there. It could’ve done a lot of harm to all of you. I let my hatred get in the way of what’s important to this group.” She nods to his leg. “...Keith, take care of yourself. They took everything from me.  I’d hate it if they took you too.”

Keith looks at her face, at the quiet way she looks at everything.  She’s careful with her expressions, she always has been. But her eyes get a funny twinge of _something_ that hurts him.

“Yeah...”  Keith says softly.  “I am careful, Krolia...  I was taught by the best, after all.”

She looks up at him, a small smile tugging on her lips.  “I’ve told you already that brown nosing will get you nowhere.”

He laughs and holds up his hands.  “I was telling the _truth_.”

“I’m not so sure if jabbing a knife into your arm can be considered careful.”

“It was that or Lance.  And I heal quickly.”

She rolls her eyes and sighs, but the despair is clearing out of her expression.  It’s weary but just exasperated. For tonight, that’s a victory.

“Goodnight, Krolia,” Keith says.  “Or...good morning. You know what I mean.”

She smiles at him slightly before pulling away.  “Goodnight, Keith.”

He watches her go until she’s made it upstairs.  He wishes he could take away her pain these few days each year, but he can’t.

But she’s right: he’s got to take care of himself some days.  He wanders back to the lighthouse, yawning. It’s been a day. A night.  A morning. He’s ready to just conk out for as long as he wants.

He can’t sleep well with the daylight in his eyes, but he can’t exactly cuddle up with the vampire, so he takes the pillows from the window seat and brings them to his study to set up on the bench there.  He stares back at the bookcase still covering the opening to his bedroom. Hesitates.

Everything looks unmoved, but still, he feels that little tingle of apprehension in his gut as he thinks of what could happen, or even, more simply, of what rests behind the barricade.

It almost feels like a dream, some sort of lie.  He’s not that stupid, is he? But he pushes the bookcase back into its place and peels the curtain back and yeah...there it is.  Sleeping still.

The wound across its face looks worse now than it did earlier; the noxious purple creeps up the skin.  ...His burns from the sun are not any better. Altogether, it’s too much. Keith sighs as he realizes the vampire is at the point that his wounds will consume him if Keith does nothing.

But he’s not a witch, like Allura.  And he’s not even really an alchemist, like Pidge and Hunk.  And he’s so fucking tired, his makeshift bed ready and open for him.  But this is something he must do...and on his own too.

He turns from his bed and drags himself to his bookcases, frowning into the disorganized mess, hunting for the right kind of book.  Who wants to heal a vampire? No one. But he knows it’s here somewhere. He sort of has it organized: his more scholarly books are on the right side of the room and not the left.

After pulling down armfuls of books and cluttering up the floor into a book maze, he finally finds the recipe he’s been looking for and brings it up to his alchemy table.  It’s more like a beginner chem set, little flasks and bunsen burners. There are jars of dried herbs and slabs and mortars and pestles and he doesn’t really know what he’s doing, but that’s what instructions are for.

He heaves the book onto the table and carefully gets to work.

He mashes the ingredients together, boils them and waits for the perfect color...overdoes it, redoes it.  The air begins to smell of herbs and the room starts getting too hot. He has to open a window and let the draft from the sea come in, but sometimes that’s dangerous too.  The ocean air can be too misty at times, too salty others, and it can fuck with the recipe.

But it’s probably fine.  By the end of it, Keith’s face is smeared with the guts of several different creatures and there are sprigs of dried herbs sticking to his clothes and hair.

Time to do this.

Time to betray Krolia.

He shakes his head.  No. He’s not betraying...it has nothing to do with her or the Blades.  He’s just... He just wants to understand himself. Why this vampire seemed different.

He looks down into the black goo in the mortar in his hands.  He’s kind of nervous to administer this. Especially when he realizes he’s been awake for almost two days without rest.  That’s just asking for mistakes.

Well, it’s all he’s got right now.

He walks down the steps and turns the corner.  He stares at the bookcase, takes a deep breath and nudges it aside.

Through the curtain, the form lies motionless.  It is still a vampire. Keith was sort of hoping it wouldn’t be; that he dreamt this whole thing in his exhausted state.

No matter how he tries to convince himself it isn’t, deep in his heart he recognizes this betrayal.  This goes against everything he’s ever done.

And yet, he kneels beside his bed, reaching a hand out and brushing the hair from its face.  It would’ve been beautiful as a human. Its face is gentle ( _Masks_ , Krolia’s voice whispers in his head), its jaw sturdy.  It looks trustworthy; it exudes it naturally, even in sleep.

He takes a deep breath and reaches into the jar in his hand, dipping his fingers into the substance.  He runs the black goo over its wound, pressing the churned bits into the divot there. He scoops more out and begins to lay it over the wounds.

The vampire tenses slightly, brow furrowing like it’s in pain.

Keith bites his lip.  Did he hurt it...? Did he mess up the recipe?

But, just as soon, the vampire settles back into its place.

Keith leans forward, tipping his nose curiously into the vampire’s space.

...It really is beautiful...  Vampires have that special something to them, Keith is well aware of that.  Like a moth to the flame, the way a vampire collects their prey is through their beauty.  But there’s something beyond that here, something tender, genuine. Keith finds himself leaning forward even more.  It smells nice too. It’s not really a smell Keith can describe, it’s heady and calming. Like the fragrance around a newly blossomed flower.  Healing.

Its skin is so soft, creamy, like milk.  Keith wonders what it’d feel like if he were to touch it and let himself feel.  He reaches up to test it. Beautiful. It’s so beautiful. And it’s not a sticky overpowering kind of beautiful. It’s...it’s...

What is Keith doing?  He blinks to himself, jerking back so quickly, he nearly topples backwards.

 _Dammit_ !  This is why he hates vampires...  He can’t even trust _himself_ around them.  His heart’s still beating hard from looking at it.

He turns his eyes away and shifts, trying to get ahold of himself.

He knows their tricks.  He knows them... He feels so _stupid_.  No one’s even around to see this idiocy, but his cheeks are burning in humiliation.  He’s so damn weak.

Keith shifts a bit, leaning his back against the bed and staring out the crack of the curtain, where light is still pouring through the window, glowing softly.

He’s going to get them all killed.  He doesn’t want to betray Krolia’s trust or the trust of their friends...but when he thinks of drawing his knife against this vampire's throat, for some reason, his mind won’t let him get that far.

He’s in the vampire’s grip already.  He’s the fly trapped in the spider’s web.  The moth to the flame. He _knows_ that’s exactly what’s happening...that has to be this feeling in his gut, new and unfamiliar, but why can’t he pull back from it?  Why hasn’t he ever felt this before with the other vampires that tried to compel him?

How many has Keith killed?  How many? Pidge and the others have problems eliminating the children and the doe-eyed stammering ones - their knives tremble in their hands. They hesitate.  But not Keith. ...That’s why he’s been so successful; there’s never been anything holding him back. He can kill any of them. Any of them at all.

He knows what he has to do to end this confusion.  It’d be so simple. But...

But -

He hits his forehead into his knees and groans in defeat.  God, what’s wrong with him?

Maybe he’s just lonely...  Maybe he’s just imagining the look he thought he saw in the vampire’s eyes - a familiar feeling he knows too well - helpless and at the mercy of fate.  Trying to do his best, alone at the end of a knife anyway.

Maybe he thinks he sees a kindred spirit in this.

But he’s probably just being compelled.  He’s so _stupid_.

With a sigh, Keith closes his eyes.  ...Or maybe he doesn’t care anymore. Maybe he hates living here, alone.  Hates how he feels bitterness rise up in his throat as people thank him for saving their families...when he has no one to return to.

No, he doesn’t have it as bad as Krolia, who lost the ones she loved.  And it’s not like he’s completely alone. He just... He sees the way Lance’s mom dotes on him.  The way Pidge’s and Hunk’s parents hold them tightly like they’re irreplaceable. He once thought Krolia could be like his mom, but though the years have brought them close, sometimes she’s still so distant.

She’s never told him she loves him.  She’s never asked what he wants out of life.

 _You’re like their perfectly made weapon_ , Lance once said.  He had meant it as a compliment, but it had struck Keith through.

He is their weapon.

He had no one else so they took advantage of that and honed him.

 _Don’t get hurt_ , Krolia says and it feels genuine and her eyes have that strange look of hurt Keith can’t figure out, but then sometimes she’s so cold and he wonders if what she really means is that she just doesn’t want to lose the weapon she’s crafted for twenty years - him.

He is lonely.  He’s been lonely for a long time.  He knew, earlier this morning, that he’d have to come back to this lighthouse by himself, hear the nothingness pressing around him, tearing him apart slowly.  And then, he saw the loneliness in this vampire's eyes and couldn’t bear to snuff out its life too.

Maybe they can be miserable together, his stupid mind probably thought.  But good job on that one...vampires and humans could never mix. Especially being who he is.

It’s almost laughable.  And he does laugh. He presses his face into his knees as he holds his legs to his chest tightly and he laughs miserably into his pants.  He laughs like it’s funny at first, and then it turns bitter...and then it’s not laughter at all. It’s small torn whimpers and tears. And then he grits his teeth and rubs angrily at his face and his misery turns to hatred.  For himself. For this stupid situation. For thinking a _vampire_ could _help_.

He falls asleep angry.  He dreams of having parents, but they don’t have faces.  He dreams of being happy, but he’s not sure what that’s like.

 

He wakes with a start, intuition screaming in his ear that _something’s not right_.

His eyes dart around.  His hands are black, mortar filled with black goo overturned and oozing over his lap and arms.  He’s in his room. And...

He whirls around, coming face-first with the vampire.  It’s close. Far too close. Staring curiously.

Its voice is soft, smooth as the inside of a shell.  Its melody rolls through Keith like music, hitting all the right tones that make Keith’s heart vibrate in unison.  Pulling him closer, inviting Keith’s weary body into its comfort. “...Hi,” it says quietly into the silence.

Keith jerks back, scrambling up the stairs.  In his panic, he accidentally pushes the curtain open.  Evening light slips through over its face - just a crack - and it _hisses_ in pain, hiding in the corner of the room, shoulders tight.

It grabs at the new burn mark in shock.

Keith puts the jar down and scoots a bit closer, making his movement away from the curtain deliberate enough for the vampire to realize.  Darkness falls over them again. “...I’m not here to hurt you,” Keith says slowly. The vampire watches him closely. “But don’t be foolish enough to take that for granted.  One wrong move and I will kill you in ways worse than the sun.”

The vampire turns its eyes back up, but its expression is different now.  The innocent curiosity is gone. Its full attention is trained on Keith carefully.

Keith says, “Everyone with you in that house is dead.  No one is coming to save you. So don’t even think of trying anything.”

Keith lights the candelabra and the flame draws shadows across the room.

It takes a sharp breath in as it takes the sight of Keith in, fear sparking across its face.  With visible effort, it settles again.

Its voice shakes as it speaks.  “Y-You... I thought you looked familiar.”

“I’m part of the Blade of Marmora.”

“Yes.  I know.  Keith Kogane,” it whispers, closing its eyes heavily.  It nods to itself slowly, resigned. “The vampire hunter.  ...I knew it.”

Keith tsks.  Yes, everyone does.  He hates it. “You’ve heard how I kill vampires.”

“Who doesn’t know you?  You’re the reason the town still exists.”

“One of many.  And you’re in the heart of their hideout.”

It nods slowly.  “...Right.” Its voice grows faint.  “Are you going to torture me?”

Keith watches the dread on its face.  The soft way it doesn’t even think to fight.  ...Why wouldn’t you fight in the face of death like this?  “If I said yes?”

“What do you mean?”

“What will you do?”  Keith asks.

It doesn’t respond.  Its hand just clenches onto the sheets of Keith’s bed tightly.

“Vampires are evil,” Keith says darkly, crossing his arms and leaning against the wall to glare down at it.  “It’s just in your nature. If given the opportunity to kill, you’ll take it. That’s how it is. And why not? Self preservation.  It’s an instinct we all have; I can hardly blame you.”

Keith watches him sharply.

It looks like a human.  It responds like a human.  ...But it’s not. He’s dealt with vampires like this for years now.  He knows how to handle them, monsters that they are.

This should be easy; it hasn’t had any blood in awhile, and newborns can forget themselves in the face of that.  It’ll just take a little push to find its true nature.

Keith walks to his dresser and takes out a small vial.  He tosses his knife onto the bed beside the vampire.

It looks between the knife and Keith uneasily.

“Take it in your hands,” Keith says.

It shakes its head slowly.  “...I’m not a fighter.”

“ _Take it_.”

 _The first chance they get_ , Krolia has always said.   _They_ will _kill you_.

Keith grabs the vile and walks up to the vampire, sitting on the edge of the bed beside it.  It tilts away slightly, drawing itself up even straighter, tense.

Keith shifts the glass between his fingers, watching the liquid slide and separate inside the vial’s walls.  “This is a concoction made by a witch that burns through things. Think of it as an acid, only once it touches any sort of organic material, it cannot be neutralized.  It will erode away though tissue, through bone, slowly and painfully. It’s what we use to torture vampires who have information we want. We’ve never needed anything else.  We start with this and we end with this. I’ve heard rumor it’s more painful than the sun, but I wouldn’t know. I’m always the one using it.”

“...I don’t know anything,” it whispers.

“I didn’t think you did,” Keith murmurs lowly.  “...But I’m curious about you and I want answers I can trust.”

It takes in a sharp breath and holds it, closing its eyes.  “You can just ask and I’ll tell you.”

Keith uncorks the bottle and it makes a little squeak as the cork rubs against the glass.  He looks up beneath his eyelashes at it. The vampire holds the knife in its hand still. Though it fights to keep its voice steady, the knife trembles and shakes.

“Open your eyes,” Keith murmurs.

Slowly, it does so.

“You don’t want to be hurt, do you?”

It shakes its head.

“You don’t want your skin to be eaten away, _do you_?”

“No,” it whispers.

“Then what are you waiting for?  Use the knife if you hate the idea so much.”

It looks like it wants to throw up.  Vampires can’t get green, but it almost seems like it does.  Its eyes dart around the room anywhere but at Keith. “...I can’t fight,” it says weakly.

Keith jerks the vial out over the vampires arm, still pointed up so it doesn’t fall out.  But only just. “ _Do it_.”

“God -” it grits out, shaking its head.  “God, I can’t.”

“Playing innocent, are we?”  Keith spits lowly, climbing onto the bed over its lap.  He grabs its collar, jerking it up and into Keith’s face.  Its eyes are wide in real fear. “Every other vampire has already tried that before.  Fight. _Fight!”_

“I - I’m not - I can’t -!”

“Do you think this is some sort of game?”  Keith hisses into its face. “I will _kill_ you.  I’ll torture you until you can’t remember your name anymore.  And when you’re so spent that all you know is pain, I’ll bring you right back from the edge and start over.  I’m make you regret ever having saved me.”

“Stop,” it breathes tightly.  Its hand shakes so badly that it drops the knife.  The knife slips off the bed and onto the floor.

This...isn’t how things usually happen.  It’s always the first opening, the first opportunity, when they’re scared and reckless, that they strike.  So when will it strike?

It’s just gritting its teeth, looking away from Keith.

Keith doesn’t get it.  He doesn’t understand.

Angrily, Keith jumps off the bed and tosses the knife back at the vampire.

Second chance then.

“ _Use it!_ ” Keith cries.

“ _No!_ ”

“ _Do it!!_ ”

“I won’t!”  The vampire grabs the knife and throws it out the doorway, through the curtain, out of sight.

Keith doesn’t know why, but rage rises up within himself at the sight, bitter and numbing.  It’s like a fire consumes him.

He grabs onto the vampire and tosses it down to the bed.

“Stop!”  It pleads with Keith.  It’s big enough to fight back, it’s strong enough to knock Keith out with one hit, but it just lays there beneath Keith, taking it.

Keith pins it there, shoving it’s head down and dumping the vial over its face, where the burn is.

The potion hisses slightly, binding the wound.  It heals.

The vampire’s teeth are clenched tightly.  It bites back a sob.

Keith is breathing in harsh ragged gasps.  There’s bitterness in his throat that almost tastes like bile.  He tosses the glass vial away and it clatters to the ground.

The vampire shakily presses its hands to its face.  “...It-it’s not burning,” it whispers after a second.  “...It’s a healing potion...?” He looks up to Keith in utter confusion.  It almost seems upset that it _didn’t_ burn.   “...Why...?”

Keith shakes his head.  His throat is tight and he feels miserable.  He doesn’t know what he’s doing. He doesn’t understand what any of this is.  Is it even a vampire laying before him? Keith hates that he can’t identify its type.   _All_ vampires fit into a _type_.

“God...” Keith whispers tightly.  He runs his hand subconsciously over his wound, pressing his hand hard into it to remind himself that there’s a reason he’s doing this.  There’s a reason he has to be rough with their kind. They never show mercy, so Keith can’t either.

So why does he feel like shit looking into this vampire’s face?

“...Your kind have ruined everything,” Keith tells it, reminding himself.  “You’ve killed everything I could’ve ever had... It’s like everything I ever do, every moment I spend fighting is pointless because you disgusting monsters keep _sprouting up_ like _vermin_.  ...I’m sick of your kind.  I’m so. Sick. Of all of you.”

It stares up at Keith carefully, its hands still raised over its face.  “...I’m sorry,” it whispers. It sickens Keith that it looks genuine. But Keith can’t tell.  They’re all liars.

Keith shakes his head one more time, climbing off of it.  “...No,” he says lowly, rubbing a hand over his face. He keeps it there.

It should’ve killed him.  It was panicked. It was primal.  Keith saw it on the vampire’s damn face.  It should’ve made a move - any move - to kill Keith, to at least _fight back_ , but it didn’t.  It didn’t do anything.  If that really had been acid, the vampire would’ve burned.

It says, quietly, “...Earlier...you saved me”.

Keith breathes out lowly into his hands.  “ _You_ did it first,” Keith accuses lowly.  “It doesn’t make any sense. _You_ don’t make any sense.  Why?” Keith demands. “Why would you do that?  I was there to _kill you_.”

It watches Keith’s face for a long time.  Finally, it lets its eyes fall to the floor.  “I don’t know why. I was basically delirious in pain.  Maybe I didn’t realize who you were.”

“You just said you knew me...  You said you recognized me.”

“I don’t know,” it says wearily.

“That was a vampire you killed.  That was your brethren. That was your _kin_ . You killed it to save me.   _Why_?”

“What does it matter to you?”

Keith’s anger spikes and he takes a fiery step forward.  “I just - !” He pauses as he sees how the vampire jerks away, watching Keith like he’s the monster.  Like he’s the killer.

...It hadn’t done that before.  ...Maybe he is.

He lets out a deep slow breath, forcing himself to step back and calm his voice.  “...Every vampire I’ve ever interacted with ever has either begged me for its life or tried to take mine first instead.  ...I want to know what you want. What’s your game?”

It licks its lips.  Lets out a small troubled breath.  “It wasn’t part of any master plan.  ...You just... You looked like you were in trouble...  And something about your face, I...” He’s quiet for a long while.  “There was just something about your face,” he mumbles out lowly. “I don’t know.  I just did it, okay? I see it there still, even now...”

Keith grits his teeth to try to cover the surprise that shocks through him.  “What about those you’ve already tortured? The ones you already killed? Did they get your mercy because of _their_ faces?”

“I would never do that,” it whispers and Keith is inclined to believe it.  “No matter what their _faces_ look like.  I didn’t mean it like that.”

Keith watches him with a deep frown in his brow.  “...I don’t know what to do with you,” he admits. “I...  I was supposed to kill you and didn’t. But it doesn’t mean you’re off the hook.  If you leave here, you’ll die. ...This is your last place of refuge, this room.”

“Why am I here?”  It asks, confused.

Keith doesn’t know.  He stares at it, wishing he had an answer.  He doesn’t come up with one.

He stands up and leaves, ignoring the wonder on its face.

 

At night, Keith sleeps with one eye open.  He’s certain this is it, the chance the vampire’s been waiting for.  He shoves a pillow onto the bench by his window and looks up at the night sky, mad at himself, mad at the vampire.  He’s just plain mad.

He’s so fucking tired though, he can’t stay awake any longer.  He goes to sleep discontent again, tiring himself out more than resting.  Any second now, he thinks.

But he wakes in the morning unscathed.

He peels the curtain back.  Glares down at the figure still there, who sleeps.

He’s angry the rest of the day.  He eats dinner with the other Blades, but they all sense his black mood and leave him alone.  He goes into the training room and beats the training dummies until his body is numb, his knuckles are bloodied, and he can barely keep his eyes open.

By night, he’s a raging ball of tension that only spikes inside of him worse when he sees the vampire is still there, only just waking again, eyes falling on Keith as he rips the curtain away.

“Why are you still here?!”  Keith forces through his gritted teeth.

“...I don’t understand,” it says.  “You told me to stay here or I’d be killed.”

“I don’t get you,” Keith spits.  “I was completely vulnerable all night last night.  I was asleep. You could’ve killed me.”

It shakes its head.  “I’ve already told you, I’m not going to do that.”

“Why _wouldn’t you_?”  Keith all but yells.

“That’s not me.”

Keith groans, shaking his head.  “You are a _vampire_ .  Of _course_ it’s you.”

“No.”

“I know vampires!  I know them. What the hell is wrong with you?”

It just watches Keith.

“...God,” Keith hisses, grabbing at his hair and turning away.  He tries to take a moment to breathe, but it just helps to rise the tension knotting inside of his core.  “What the hell am I doing? What _the hell_ am I doing?!  If my mentor found you in here, she would _destroy you_.  And then she’d destroy me.  This is so -” He groans.

“...They don’t know I’m here?”

“Of course they don’t,” Keith whispers in horror.  “A vampire? Right at our home? Are you insane?”

“I...”  It shifts uncomfortably.  “I don’t understand what this is about...”  It admits awkwardly. “...Are you going to torture me?  Kill me?” It looks down at the sheets that it’s laying in, at the string of dried vines hanging around the ceiling and the soft canopy falling around it.  “...Am I in your room?”

Keith clenches his eyes shut.  He doesn’t have anything to say.  He tosses the curtain away and leaves.

...He has to get ahold of himself.  ...But all he knows how to do is get a rise out of vampires and kill them.  And he can’t seem to be doing either with this vampire, so it’s backfiring and hitting him right in his face.  He was already scared and out of control before, but it’s somehow so much _worse_ now the way the vampire isn’t reacting in any of the ways he thinks it might.

It’s so different than the others.  Keith doesn’t get why that scares him so much.

He’s got to calm down.  Think.

What the hell does he do with it?

He already knows, for whatever reason, he can’t kill it.  He won’t _let himself_.  And he can’t let it go.  So...he’s keeping it?

Keith bites at his lip and paces anxiously through the lighthouse, hands on his hips as he tries to get himself to _think_.

If the vampire stays, he can’t just keep it here, alone, without anything to do.  It’ll get bored, right? Vampires probably get bored. And when things get bored, they wreak havoc.  And vampires get hungry. Keith knows that.

He grabs a handful of books from the shelving and sets them in the room as it sleeps.  That’s got to help...for now. Until he gets his head on right.

And vampires drink blood.  Obviously.

But no human blood.  He can’t let that happen.  Technically, vampires should be able to survive on the blood of animals and it sounds horrible at first until he remembers he eats animals.

Okay.  Alright.  A plan. He can hunt for it.

When Keith goes outside, strikes a rabbit through the head with an arrow and brings it back home, tossing its dead body onto the floor in front of the vampire, he thinks maybe that’s when it’ll show its true colors.  That it will be so hungry it won’t be able to resist. It’ll dig into it like the animal it is, blood smearing across its face and leaking onto the ground. Its monstrous eyes will gleam through the darkness with its ravenous hunger, hunched over with guts hanging from its hands.

But the vampire tenses at the sight, takes a small shuddering breath, and looks away.

“Why did you bring that?”  It grimaces over the book it’s reading.

Keith just stares.  “It’s food. For you to eat.”

It shakes its head.  “You killed a rabbit?  Why? It might have a _family_.”

Keith gawks.

Wrong, wrong, wrong, this is all wrong.  What the hell _is_ this thing?

The next day, Keith tosses himself moodily on the couch behind Pidge as she hunches over the alchemy table.  He watches her for a few moments before groaning out, “Do vampires have a thing against rabbits?”

“What?”  She looks up from her work and frowns at him.  Readjusts her goggles. Frowns at him again. “Why would you say that?”

“I was just thinking.  What do they usually like to eat?”

“Uh, _people_?  They suck them until they’re dry?  You okay?”

“Well, right, right, but what else?  People can’t be their _only_ diet.”

“Why are you asking _me_?”

“You’re the one always saying you want to write a book on them.  You love poking at their dead bodies. Wouldn’t you know?”

She rolls her eyes and snorts.  “I’ve never asked a dead body its food preference before.”

“I was reading the other night -”

“-Therein lies the problem-”

“- _And I heard_ that they can eat other animals.  Or...drink their blood. Whatever. Since they go for humans by default, you’ve got to assume that humans taste the best, right?  So then that means that animals taste _different_ from humans.  But if humans are technically an animal then that means other animals taste different from other _other_ animals.  I mean...right?  So if they hated rabbits, just say...what else do you think they’d like?  Because a rabbit has got to taste so different from a fox to them. ...It’s blood though.  Is it the iron content? The foods they eat? ...What is it that makes one animal’s blood different from the other...?  How do we know which one would work the best? If it’d even work... That’s an interesting thought. What if one is poisonous or something because it doesn’t have enough red blood cells or something.  I mean, that’s a thing, right? Or _white_ blood cells?  What if immunity is what fucks up the taste?  How would we know? It’s only vampires who would know.  Animals have white blood cells too, right? Do they have as many as us?  I mean, is each animal’s system the same? Is it even related? What do you think?  Pidge?”

She lifts her goggles to rest on top of her head and stares at him, blinking a few times before murmuring in a low confused tone, “Uh...you okay?  You sound kinda manic.”

“What?  No, I’m fine.  I was just wondering about it.  ...Why do they go after humans specifically?”

“Keith, I dunno,” she leans back on her chair and crosses her arms, still watching him in confusion.  “Maybe they do go after animals, but the animals can’t complain to us that they’re missing family?”

“...What would be their favorite?”

“Well,” she raises an eyebrow, turning from him slowly.  “I’ve never tested it myself, but it _is_ sort of an interesting idea, isn’t it?  Save a vampire for me next time and we’ll experiment.”

He snorts.  “Krolia would _love_ that.”

“She sure would when we get some seriously valuable information.  I’d love it too. I’ll write that whole damn book out in one go. But honestly?  All I know is that vampires drink the blood of humans.” She pauses and holds up a finger.  “Oh! And also, that if they drink dead blood, it poisons them.”

“Oh...right.  I can’t believe I forgot,”  He murmurs as he pushes himself up, eyes brightening.

“Well, it’s not like you ever have to worry about anything besides killing them...”

Dead blood.

Maybe that’s the problem.

He rolls off the couch and hunts through the forest right after that.  He brings a live fox this time, holding it out by its legs to the vampire.

“Here,” Keith says.  “You need to eat. You look horrible.  You won’t survive like this.”

It stares at Keith like he’s crazy.  “...That’s a fox.”

“Yeah.”

“A...a live fox.”

“Brilliant observation.  Will you eat or not?”

“I couldn’t.  ...I had a fox when I was a kid; we couldn’t afford a dog.  He was my best friend.”

“Best friend...?”  Keith mutters. He puts the struggling fox back in his bag, holds the flap closed as it rages against him, and thinks.  “...Well, what do you want? Maybe some other animal? A deer, maybe? Please just tell me, it’s killing me here.”

“Nothing.  I won’t eat an animal,” it mutters.  “Not like this.”

“You’ll _die_.”

“...I’m sorry for all the trouble.  You don’t have to worry about me.”

Keith sighs, trying not to grit his teeth together in frustration.  He leaves and comes back with water. “At least drink something.”

“...I...  No.” It holds its out hand in a stop motion.  “I don’t even think vampires drink water.”

Keith growls lowly, “ _Why are you being so stubborn_ ?  I’m trying to _help_ you.”

“I know.  I appreciate it, really, I do, but ever since I was turned...  I just...” He takes in a deep steady sigh and then turns to look at the wall.  He looks so lonely there, so hurt and insulted. But then he pulls it back and turns his smile back on Keith.  “Thank you. Really. But I can’t.”

Keith sets the water cup down with an angry clack.  “Fine. Wither away then. See if I care.”

Why is he so mad?  Keith wonders at himself as he stalks out of the room and tosses the curtain back.  He guesses...it’s almost like having a new dog. Like a pet. And he had expected it to be easy, expected it to be fun, but it’s not.  His new dog is stubborn. Maybe that’s it.

He needs advice.  Again.

He leaves the lighthouse for the manor and finds Pidge in her usual place in the corner again, fiddling with a flask.  He sits down to watch her. Her hair is an absolute disaster.

“Got another weird question for me?”  She hums, tilting her head and tsking as the mixture begins to bubble and spew over the top of the rim.

“Where is everyone?”  He asks.

“Ugh, you know how it is.  Everyone’s off doing their own thing.  If Krolia hasn’t called on you, you’re probably fine.  She mentioned the other day how you looked kind of out of it.  I think she’s letting you rest.” Her eyes focus on the flask for a moment longer and then she turns her eyes up to him, curious. “...You look irritated about something.  What’s up?”

“I dunno,” he grunts, letting himself fall back on the couch and stare at the ceiling.

“I think you doooo,” she sings under her breath.

He sighs, thinking of the skies out there, how they’re the same skies that his parents had looked upon twenty years ago.  How that moon is the same moon they cherished.

He wonders if they ever felt like this.  What they would think of him if they knew what he was doing.

He knows what Krolia would think and he sighs, unhappy.  “I turned twenty a few weeks ago.”

Pidge snorts.  “Okay. I _know_.  We made you that cake, remember?  Did you want a medal or something?”

“I’ve just been thinking.  It’s been twenty whole years that I’ve always done what everyone else has told me to do.  I’ve never done anything for myself. And now I’ve gotten to wondering what would happen if I did do that, if I tried to fight for my own choice in something.  But...if I did that and everything just _failed_ ...what if that means I can’t do anything beyond what people want of me?  What if I’m not really a _person_?  Just a tool?”

She stops, putting the flask down.  She shifts her glasses on her nose and narrows her eyes on him.

He bites at his lip, glaring up at the ceiling.  “...Does your life ever feel...I dunno, hollow? Like...like there’s really no point in doing what you’re doing?  Like it wouldn’t make a difference if you just stopped it all?”

She’s quiet for a moment.  “...You feel that way?”

“Not exactly?  I don’t know. I like what we’re doing...I like helping people, knowing that we’re helping to make them safe, but...  I just... What if we’re...not helping people in the way I thought we were...?” He sighs and rubs a hand over his face. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me.  I used to be so into this, but lately, it’s like I can’t focus no matter how much I fight for it. I think seeing Lance’s mom doting on him fucked me up the other day.  Everyone here has a life outside of what we do, everyone except for me. Sometimes I just...I wonder what it’d be like if I had a family. If could spend holidays together, share each other’s secrets, go to festivals together.”  He catches himself, his brightening eyes growing dim again. “...God, that’s embarrassing. Forget I ever said that; I’m being a huge baby. I’m sorry.”

“I don’t think you’re being a huge baby.”

“It was the anniversary of Krolia’s family’s death the other day and she was...weird.  I’ve been thinking about things.”

“Ah,” Pidge hums knowingly, starting a bit as she sees the vial next to her is bubbling angrily out of control by this point.  She shoves it in a bucket. “You know you have a family, Keith. You have us.”

“I know that,” he says softly.  “But it’s different. ...I never got to know my parents.  I never got to even see a picture of them. What were they like?  Did they want me? Would they have approved of me? I-it’s stupid.  I just wish sometimes I had like _one hour_.  That’s it.  Just to ask them whatever I wanted.  That would be pretty nice.”

“Yeah...  Yeah, it would.  Maybe you can keep a diary or something,” Pidge says, reaching over into her bag and tossing him a nicely bound empty book.  “It’s always my parents’ go-to solution whenever I have too much built up in my brain. I just got that one at the pawn shop for a vampire tooth.  Looks cool, right? I love that brand in the front. If you ask me, it has a very ‘Keith’ feel to it.”

Keith hums in surprise as he looks it over.  “Nice trade. I need to start saving vampire teeth too.”

“Yeah, it’s all fun and games until you prick your finger on one.  I dunno if you’re careful enough for that, Keith.”

Keith laughs, pushing himself up.  “Yeah...” He’s quiet for a moment, thinking of the creature waiting upstairs for him.  “Hey, Pidge? Do you think that vampires have feelings?”

She blinks in surprise.  “...You know what Krolia says.”

“Of course I know what _Krolia_ thinks, but I’m asking you.  Krolia has her reasons for hating them.  I get it. But...do you just think sometimes that maybe, just maybe, there might be something more to them?”

Pidge licks her lips, turning her eyes from him and frowning into the fire.  She looks nervous. “...It doesn’t matter what I think.”

Interesting.  Keith pushes him off the seat and chases after Pidge.  “What do you mean? Of course it matters what you think.  Why would you say that?”

“Keith, just stop.”

“What?”  He pushes.  “Why are you getting all upset?  I’m just asking for your opinion, not for top secret information.”

“I don’t want to get in trouble with you or Krolia, okay?  I know what she thinks. I know what she’s taught you and I respect that.   You two are a force, okay? You do a lot of good.”

He pauses, scoping out her expression.  She tries to look back down at her work, tries to hide it, but he’s known her long enough to understand.  “...You do, don’t you? You think they feel things.”

She keeps her lips pressed together.

“How much, Pidge?”

She goes about organizing the flasks by color, something Krolia always harps on them to do, but also something that _never_ gets done.

“Like us?”  Keith murmurs.  “Like regular people?”

Pidge heaves a sigh and tsks.  She leans forward onto the palms of her hands, looking like she’s about to take a leap off a building.

“Pidge, please.  I’ve been thinking a lot lately and it’s been driving me _crazy_.  I just want your honest opinion...  I won’t tell Krolia.”

She takes in a long deep breath and turns weary eyes to Keith.  “I’m not an expert, okay?” Pidge whispers, eyes falling to the entrance hall behind him.  “But honestly? I think not much changes inside. Not emotionally, at least. I mean, does it scar them?  Sure? Scare them? Definitely. They become hungry in different ways; they learn how to prey on others in different ways.  ...But do they become some super emotionally exempt being? ...You see their faces.”

“...But they kill so many of us.”

“Yes, some of them do.  But then, we all need to eat, Keith.  And to eat, we have to take something else’s energy, like we do other animals, other plants, that’s just how it works.  ...I think they’re still like us though.” She hesitates. “...Please don’t tell Krolia I said that. I don’t want her mad at me.”

He’s quiet for awhile.

“You won’t tell her, will you?”  Pidge fidgets.

“No, of course not,” he mutters.  “But Krolia’s not unfair. She won’t prosecute for opinions.”

“No, I just...  I know what she thinks of them.  Some of them do horrible things sometimes.  But I mean, aren’t humans just the same? There’s a reason this town needs a sheriff.  ...I just...sometimes I think...” She lets her words trail away.

“What?”  Keith asks.

“No.  I’ve said too much.  It’s fine, Keith. We have to do what we’re doing.  We can’t just leave them.”

“No,” Keith mutters.  “They kill families.”

“They do.  Just like they killed your parents.”

“That’s right,” Keith murmurs.  “...They did.”

She’s quiet for a moment.  “Keith, are...are you okay?  You’ve been...you’ve seemed strange lately.  We haven’t really had talks like this before.”

He takes a deep breath and nods.  “Yeah. Yeah, I’m fine.”

Pidge inspects him but then goes back to her work.  She doesn’t ask any more.

 

Keith brings in a coyote this time.  It struggles in his arms but he grits his teeth with determination.  “You’ve got to eat something,” he says.

The vampire looks away.

Keith sighs.  “You don’t have to kill it.  Just drink a little. I’ve bled tons before and it’s been fine.  A little won’t hurt it and we’ll let it go merrily on its way back to whatever life it has.  No harm done.”

This the vampire considers.  So that was the problem all along...

Keith watches as it carefully puts its book away and turns to the coyote, eyes trained on it like the coyote is a large vicious monster.  The vampire reaches for it hesitantly, gently taking it from Keith’s grasp. It holds the coyote between its hands for awhile, face focused.  Keith can see the hunger bubble up and ripple. Keith thinks it’ll do it -

But no.

The vampire lets the animal down gently and Keith has to scramble to catch the feisty thing before it runs off.  It tries to dart out of the room and Keith throws himself at it, tackling it to the floor and latching on. He struggles it into submission.

“...You really won’t eat?”  Keith asks on a whisper, pushing his bangs from his face.

“Vampires can live for years without drinking blood.”  It taps the book laying out on the nightstand. “I read it.”

“ _Old_ vampires.  With blood already in its tissues.  You’re new, aren’t you? And you said you haven’t had blood, so that doesn’t apply to you.”

“...It doesn’t matter.  I won’t do it.”

“...You will _die_.”

“I thought that’s what you wanted.”

“No, I...”  Keith clears his throat.  That should be what Keith wants.  ...It’s not.

“You saved me,” Keith says quietly, shifting the coyote in his arms.  “I turned my back to you and you could’ve killed me, but you didn’t. You helped me instead, so now I owe you.”

“Is that what this is?”  The vampire’s eyes flash silver as they turn to Keith.  “I appreciate it then. ...But now what?” When Keith has no response, it continues.  “I _understand_.  You can’t let me go because then you’d have to worry I’d kill others.  You’re kind so you don’t want to kill me either. ...But you can’t keep this up.  If you’re going to do it, then just do it. ...It’s okay.”

Keith groans.  “I’m _not_ going to kill you.  I’ve already decided that.  ...I just...need you to eat.”

It shakes its head slowly, closing weary eyes.  “Have _you_ ever torn the neck of an animal and drank its blood?”  It shakes its head again. “...The thought is horrifying.”

What the fuck...?  Keith came in here with every intention of being patient, but he feels himself getting irritated again anyway.  “You’re a _vampire_ .  That’s what vampires _do_.”

“And you’re a _vampire hunter_ , so do what _you_ do!”

Keith blinks, taken aback.

The vampire presses its mouth together tightly and lets its eyelashes flutter away.  “I-I’m sorry... I don’t want to hurt anything. ...That’s just not me. And I hate just..laying here all the time in this one room, waiting for you to come back with your mind changed, knife in hand to kill me.  I’m going crazy.”

Keith takes in a deep breath.  Holds it. Tries to keep from yelling.  “Look,” he finally says. “What’s your name?”

“My...my name?”  It looks wearily at Keith.

“Yeah.  My name’s Keith.  What’s yours?”

“Do vampires have names...?”  It looks down darkly.

Keith sighs.  “God, can you just -?”  Keith clenches his eyes shut and prays for patience.  “When you were _human_ , what was your name _then_?”

“Shiro...” it says softly, still looking down at its hands.  No. Not ‘it’. This vampire has shown more humanity that even some humans...Keith can’t deny that.

“Shiro.  Okay. Shiro,” Keith addresses him firmly, kneeling beside the bed and staring pointedly at him.  “You don’t want to be a nuisance, right?”

Shiro shakes his head.

“Well, you’re being one right now.  I want to continue my day and do the things I normally do, but you not eating is causing me a lot of grief.   _What_ will you eat?   Please. Help me help you.  It’s driving me nuts, honestly.”

Shiro says.  “No animals. The animals are...  They smell strange anyway, I don’t think that’d even work, even if I could.”

“So you would rather die?”  Keith arches an eyebrow.

“Look, you’ve made your choice and I’ve made mine.  It’s not perfect, but it’s _my_ choice.”

Keith just stares.  And, like earlier, he gets that strange tug in his gut.  Like he _understands_.  He hates it.

The vampire wants to choose its own fate.  The one not written for it.

“It’s okay,” the vampire whispers, looking out the curtain, into the little glimmer of moon it can see.  “Do you think death would really be so bad?”

“You don’t have a soul,” Keith stares at him darkly.  “I think maybe it _would_ be that bad.”

“No soul, huh...?”  Shiro murmurs as his eyes go distant.  “...I guess that’d put a damper on things...”

“What about your family?”  Keith murmurs. “There are no people waiting for you?  You have nothing to fight for?”

“Nothing like that,” he says quietly.  “My family's all dead...”

Keith stares.  He can see the pain in Shiro’s eyes.  The struggle.

And again, that feeling.

“...Mine too,” Keith finally mutters and then he gets to his feet and leaves.


	3. Chapter 3

 “Did you take your medicine today?”  Krolia asks him.

He leans back slightly and tosses her a weary look.

“You seem peaky lately,” she explains.  She looks to Pidge for backup and Pidge nods, grimacing.

“You’ve been pale and grumpy.”  Pidge shrugs when he glares at her.

He heaves a sigh.  “I dunno why,” he says lowly.  He bites at the skin in the corners of his fingernails.

Krolia’s watching him closely.  “...Maybe you should sit out on tonight’s hunt.  It’s not big. Acxa will be here this time.”

“You think I’ll mess up?”  He raises an eyebrow in her direction.

But there’s still that worry.  That cautiousness in her as she watches him.  “I just think -”

“-I can do it.  You _just_ said the other day you trusted me.  And now you don’t?” He didn’t sleep well again last night, worrying.  He can hear his voice sharper than he intended.

They both stare at him.  “...Katie,” Krolia says, “can Keith and I have a moment?”

Pidge looks down and gathers her things.  “Uh...sure.”

He frowns unhappily at Pidge for the betrayal right as she closes the door behind her and mouths a silent, ‘sorry’.

Krolia looks at him tiredly, putting a hand on her hip.  “Okay. What’s been going on with you?” Krolia asks, blunt.

He rubs a hand over his face.  “ _Nothing_.”

“Don’t lie.  I know something’s up, so let’s just get it over with.  What’s wrong? You haven’t been yourself since that night.”  She assesses him seriously. “Is it because of what I said? About wanting you to lead?”

“No,” he groans.  “I mean...maybe it’s a little bit of that.  But it’s not... It’s not that.”

She narrows her eyes at him, tilting her head to get every angle of his expression checked out.  “I’m not going to let this go until you tell me.”

He looks over at her stubborn face.  He knows she’s not kidding about that.  “It’s just... I’ve just been thinking about things.  All the people we save so they can go back home to their families.  And Lance...when he got hurt and his mom came -” He hesitates. He feels so pathetic as he forces out on a soft whisper, “...You knew my parents, didn’t you, Krolia?  Before they were killed?”

She closes her eyes and heaves a heavy sigh.  She stays there for a moment, unmoving, like she’s trying to gather the strength to get through this conversation.  He thinks, with a tiny glint of hope fluttering in the depths of his stomach, that she might actually do it this time.  That she might actually talk about them. She’s not running away immediately and that’s a good sign.

But then her expression darkens and she places a hand to her stomach.  She takes a step back. He can see her already pulling away. “Keith,” she warns, her voice low.

“You _asked_ what’s bothering me and _this_ is what’s bothering me.  You never talk about them and you’re the only one who knows!”  He frowns. “I’ve been thinking about them lately and I... I just have a few questions.  That’s it. Please, Krolia, you’ve told me before that you needed to wait until I was older and _I’m older now_ , but still, I know next to nothing.  There’s no one else I could ask. It’s just you.  Krolia... Just a few questions and I swear I won’t bring it up again.  I’ll go back to being your fighter. It’s just been wearing on me.”

“Keith -”

“ _One_ question.  Just one.” He waits.  “I could write it out -”

“ _Stop_ this,” she says again, firmer this time.  She won’t meet his eyes. “This conversation will only hurt you.”

“-Then let it hurt me!  I need to know. It’s not fair of you to withhold this from me.  They’re _my_ parents.”

“Keith, I understand.  Trust me, I do. But some things are better left not knowing.  I’m just trying to protect you.”

“I don’t need protecting -”

“-We need to focus on the future.  On the now, on what we _can_ do.  I’ve told you before, we can’t dwell on the past -”

Frustration builds.  He snarls. “Well, that’s rich coming from _you_.”

She shoots him a startled look.  The nasty cut of his words sits in the air around him.  Slowly, her look changes to one edged in ice over fury.  “I would be...very careful...how you proceed with this conversation.”

He holds her glare and then tsks angrily, pushing away from the dining room table.  “Whatever,” he whispers harshly. “It doesn’t matter. Who needs parents? Not me.”

“Keith,” she calls after him, voice tightening.  “You don’t understand. You don’t _need them_.  You’re so strong on your own.  Look at what you’ve become without them.”

“Whatever, Krolia,” he says lowly.  “You’re right. A weapon doesn’t need family.”

He makes his way to the lighthouse and shuts his door loudly behind him.  He stands there against it for awhile, staring at all the books around him.

He hoards them in the literal sense.  He knows. Hopes that their stories can make him forget about his own.  Who needs the shelves upon shelves upon shelves of them like this? He’ll never read all of these.  And the weird trinkets and old dried bouquets of flowers that Pidge used to give him...why does he keep this shit?  It doesn’t fill the hole in his heart like he used to think it did.

He lets his eyes shift back up to the little wooden bookcase that blocks the entryway to his room.

With a sigh, he pushes himself from the door and walks over to it, pushing it out of the way and pulling the curtain back.  And there’s Shiro.

A bit of day still remains, so Shiro sleeps.  He’s very still, too much so, and he looks dead.

Keith slowly lowers him against the wall and leans his arms on his knees, watching the stillness, trying to pinpoint any sign of life.  For all he knows, Shiro’s passed away in his sleep.

But as night settles, Shiro stirs.  Keith stays there, watching him awaken.  The unguarded innocent eyes revealed beneath blinking lashes. The elegant turn of his neck as he stretches gently.

A vampire...?  What does that even mean?  He doesn’t even drink blood.  He doesn’t fight or deceive. He doesn’t fit the criteria for vampire that Keith’s used to.

“Keith...”  Shiro blinks at him, tensing slightly as he realizes he’s not alone.  He pulls himself up to a seated position. They hold each other’s gaze for a moment.  “...What are you doing?”

“Nothing,” Keith whispers, unmoving.

Shiro shifts as he watches Keith’s face, scoping out all the details.  Keith’s too tired to steel and hide himself. He watches Shiro back. “...You okay?”  Shiro murmurs.

“Yeah,” Keith says.

Shiro bites at his lip.  The silence stretches out long and awkward between them.  Keith just sits in it, spirit weary, but Shiro flounders. “Um.  You’re, uh...you’re different than I thought,” he says eventually, nervous chatter.  “I knew of you before all of this. Well, _everyone_ knew of you, of course.  My friends and I....we’d, uh... We used to always run out of our classes or our homes - wherever we were - whenever we heard the buzz that you were in town.”  He laughs into his hand - a nice smooth sound as he remembers. “We’d push past people in the marketplace to try to get to you in time. Sometimes we’d be met by this wall of people and when we were too young and short to see over their heads, we’d climb on each other’s shoulders and take turns watching.  We were just as excited as the rest of them to catch sight of _the_ famous Keith Kogane.”  He smiles fondly as he remembers.  “And you were always there, waving to everyone like some tiny child prince.  God, you sure shone like one. It was like a parade, the brightness of it. The excitement in the air.  You were so young, but...I don’t think anyone really registered that. You were a warrior. Our warrior.”

He’s still smiling softly to himself and it makes Keith uncomfortable.  A vampire remembering things like this fondly. It seems so backwards. “...I’m not going to lie,” Shiro says, nodding to the woven vines around the corners of the room, the books on the floor, “I was surprised to see your room decorated so softly in here.  Are we in an attic? I think I expected knives and daggers in a large cold castle.”

Keith snorts without heart.  “...Yeah. Wrong vampire hunter.  That would be Lotor.”

“It’s cool,” Shiro says.  “My friends would’ve loved to see this.  See that you were actually more human than mythical creature stuffed into a child’s body.  That’s kind of what you felt like.”

“I had the body of a child, but I never really was one.  They wanted this for me since day one. I’ve always just been their tool.”

Shiro just watches him for a long moment.  “...Is that so...?” He says eventually. “You’ve done a lot of good.  You can’t imagine how many times you’ve saved the lives of people close to me...  When the Blades all left to travel, you wouldn’t believe how sad everyone became. And then, recently, with the rise of vampire killings in this area, even as adults, when you all came back, it felt like light again after a long dreary winter.  We were all so thankful.”

Keith looks down at his hands.  His small, pale hands. “That’s good,” he says, but the words come out so sad.  He clears his throat. “I’m sorry. I’m glad. Really, I am.”

But Shiro’s not convinced, looking at him closely.  “...You want to talk about it?”

“Not really,” Keith whispers.  “The vines along the ceiling...my friends did it for me.  They thought maybe it’d soften me a little bit. I used to take work way too seriously.  I actually did have knives and daggers there at first. But it was kind of cold. And then my friends thought, maybe if they added a touch of humanity to this place, then everything else would fall into place for me.”

Shiro looks confused, but he asks, “and did it?”

“No.  No, it never did.  I’m starting to think it’s only made everything worse.  I’m just as cold as ever. I wish that -” Keith catches himself.  A vampire. He’s talking to a vampire. He narrows his eyes at him and shifts away slightly.  “...I don’t mean to talk about this. Sorry. Tensions have been high lately. My mentor and I are usually on good terms, but we got in a fight today, so I’m...” He thinks of the right word and laughs sadly as he thinks of it, “moping, I guess.”

“Krolia,” Shiro says.  “I’ve only seen her once before, when you were small.  She was following you closely.”

“She lost her son when I was a baby and I lost my mother.  I was the right age. I think it’s easy to fall into those roles.  But I...” He clears his throat as he catches himself again. ...Vampire.  Shiro’s a _vampire_ and here’s Keith, gushing out his heart.

It’s just so easy to talk to him though, in ways he’s not used to.  He can’t tell if it’s his fault or the vampire’s. “It’s nothing,” Keith says curtly, rubbing at his collar bone. “I’ve just been tired.”

“I’ve been hogging your bed,” Shiro grimaces.

“Not that kind of tired.  I just mean... I think I’ve been tired for years now and have only started realizing it.”  He’s quiet for awhile.

Shiro seems to understand slowly.  “...And that’s why I’m here.”

Keith stares at his hands hard.  “Vampires are evil, that’s something I’ve always understood.  Vampires will kill you any chance they get... And that’s what I’ve always assumed in my blind faith for what’s been taught to me.  But you...you didn’t do what I was taught you would.” Keith’s quiet again, feeling that sick sense of desperate uncertainty rise up in his throat.  “You _saved_ me,” he says, and his words sound minced and angry.  “And it’s thrown me off. I’ve always trusted Krolia and Kolivan no matter what, but...”  He rubs at his face. He doesn’t know Shiro. He shouldn’t be talking about this with him.  But Shiro’s eyes are so wide and filled with genuine caring interest and Keith is just...

It’s so easy...  He feels so comfortable around him and he’s never quite felt that way in anyone else’s presence before, it’s disconcerting.

“I shouldn’t be saying this stuff to you,” Keith says again, hoping that it’ll convince himself.

“It’s okay,” Shiro says gently.  “It sounds hard. ...It sounds lonely.”

“It is,” Keith admits and to admit it feels very much like setting the truth free.  A bit of his weariness lifts, he realizes with surprise. To be understood - he hasn’t felt it like this before, like their hearts are resonating as one.

He looks up to Shiro’s eyes.  Feels that pull, that understanding that Shiro is special.  He can trust Shiro with anything. His hopes, his fears, and Shiro would understand.  He can give Shiro anything...and Keith could trust him with that.

He forgets how to breathe.  He wants to try...

Something in Keith’s head _screams_ violently, jarring his senses back to life.

He jerks back, startled, pressing his hands over his mouth quickly.

Oh, god.

Oh, he’s such an idiot.  He knows what this is suddenly.

He knows a vampire’s game.  They lure you in somehow...just as Shiro’s been doing.  They strip you of your defenses without you even realizing it.  Keith feels that pull. He feels himself wanting to get up from his place against the wall and sit beside this stranger.  Pour out his weary aching heart to him. He wants to wrap his arms around him and give in and tilt his vulnerable soft neck and let Shiro _have him_.

He closes his eyes tightly.  Grimaces hard. “ _Stop_ ,” he whispers harshly.  “Stop it. I’ll kill you.  I swear I will. You have to stop _now_.”

“Stop...stop what?”  Shiro whispers.

“This!”  Keith panics, tossing his hand at his chest and then throwing it back out at Shiro.  “Whatever you’re doing to make me talk! Stop it!”

Shiro blinks, looking taken aback.  His voice shrinks. “I’m... I don’t think -”

“It’s compulsion!”  Keith spits. “Of course you’re doing it!  Why else would I -!”

“Oh...I didn’t even realize.  ...I’m sorry. I don’t know how to stop it.”

Keith rubs at his brow and takes a shaky breath in.  “Don’t look at me. Don’t look. It’s - it’s the _eyes_.  It’s...”  He clenches his fist and bites at his lip, feels the pain, lets it bring him back, focused and centered.  “I’ve never been this close for so long, I...I didn’t realize myself. It’s strong.”

“I’m sorry,” Shiro says again, and the bright curiosity fizzles, replaced with darkness.  “I won’t look at you anymore.”

Ugh, he hates it.  “...There’s an antidote.  I...” He stumbles to his feet and tries to force himself out of the room, but _the pull_.  He finds he doesn’t want to leave Shiro, can’t stand the thought of being away from him and he’s terrified of the intensity of it.  His legs shake and he falls to the floor.

He hears Shiro getting up.  “ _Don’t_!”  Keith cries.  “Don’t touch me!  Don’t touch me...”  His hands shake as he reaches for his knife in his belt, but he can’t hold it and it just clatters to the ground.

He’s defenseless.  Completely utterly defenseless.  He can’t fight like this. If Shiro were to just breathe out a simple whisper, the hint of an ask, Keith would crumble right into his hands.

Keith stays on the floor, desperation clawing up his chest and into his throat, trying to jumpstart his body as his.  But he can’t. He can’t.

“...God.  Don’t.” His chest is heaving.

Shiro could do anything to him.  Anything. The larger part of himself wants it.

“I won’t move,” Shiro says with forced calm.  “I’m going to stay right here, not looking at you, until you’re comfortable again, okay?”

Keith forces himself to breathe.  He forces himself to stare at the veins bulging out of his hands, fingernails digging desperately into the floor.  He focuses on anything but this giddy high feeling rushing through him.

Slowly, he calms.

Keith dares to look up again, sees the way Shiro casts his eyes down, hands clenched tightly around the blankets over him.  It looks genuine. Is that its game...? Are they that good? Was Krolia right? Was she wrong? Is the feeling in Keith’s gut to be trusted or to be squashed out?

He’s so confused.

Shiro didn’t do anything.  Keith was right there, collapsed, easy prey.  Shiro could’ve taken all he wanted from Keith...and didn’t.

That horrifies Keith.  He can’t predict him.

Keith pulls himself up and races for the antidote.  He swipes his arm across all the bottles on the table that are in the way.  They crash into the ground as he hunts for the right one. Green. Green. He hears the ground hissing from the various potions carving through the wood, but he can’t worry himself over that right now.

His fingers finally wrap around the right one and he downs it.  He needs to purge this feeling from his gut.

Allura made it.  It works, he knows it does.  They’ve used it so many times.  But...it’s not working now.

The bottle’s half full and really all you need is one tablespoon, but he downs the rest.  He knows it’s going to make him sick to do so, but he’s scared enough by the feeling inside of himself that all he knows is that he’s got to stamp out this feeling inside of himself.  His chest feels so raw and open.

...As he waits, maybe a little of that pull lessens.  A small bit of it. There’s no longer that strange burning in his neck maybe.  But he’s... He still feels so weak.

He walks slowly back down to his room, peering in cautiously.

Shiro looks up, remembers himself, and then turns his eyes back down.  “I’m sorry,” Shiro says. “I’m so sorry. I swear I didn’t mean it.”

“No, it...it’s not your fault.  You didn’t know. I didn’t know either.”

“Better?”  Shiro whispers hopefully.

“I...yeah.  It’s better.”  But it’s a lie.  In the vicinity of the vampire, Keith still is horrified.  He realizes just how badly he wants to kiss him.

He wants to be mad about it, but he sees hurt in Shiro’s face.  He’s scared of his own body. Keith murmurs. “...It’s hard not being in control of your body.  Your body is a tool someone else honed for you, a tool that maybe you don’t want.”

Shiro takes in a breath of surprise, even though vampires don’t need air.  Keith chuckles at that, but it’s sad. Maybe he’s been wrong for so many years...  Maybe they really are just as scared as they look.

Keith looks down at his hands as he spreads his fingers wide.  His shaking hands... How he despises them.

There’s a loud knock on the door and he hears Lance yelling, “Heeey!  Anybody home?”

He darts up stiffly.  “Don’t say anything,” he breathes out to Shiro in horror who just blinks up at him, and then Keith’s out, closing the curtain tightly.

“Hey,” he breathes in surprise when he sees Pidge, Lance, and Hunk all coming in.

“God, Keith,” Pidge says.  “Ever dust? And what the heck happened to all your potions?”  She groans in dismay. “I organized them by _type_ and then by _name_ .  It took forever.  Did you _break some_?”

He can see the dust like little glowing orbs in the window’s sunlight and he waves them away.  He rubs at his eyebrow. At his nose. He’s agitated. Shiro’s only a few feet away. If any of them want to go into his room, what will he say?  They haven’t been in here in months, and suddenly, now, of all times. “Ah, I...I was trying to clean out the old ones but the dust on the glass made my hand slip.  It’s fine. What are you doing here?”

She turns from the vials and looks back at him.  “I’m sorry about earlier, Keith,” Pidge says. “I heard you two yelling...”

“And I’m sorry about the other day,” Lance wrings his hands out nervously.  “You vouched for me and believed in me and I just messed everything up for you.”

“And I’m not sorry for anything, but I brought you dinner,” Hunk says, holding a plate up.

“Thanks, guys,” he murmurs lowly, taking the plate from Hunk and walking over to a stair to sit on.  He stares down at the meal. “Is this...do these fish still have eyes?”

“Yeah, it’s a delicacy.  I was reading about it in that book you brought me back from your mission last month.  It’s supposedly the most nutritious part.”

He pokes at it.  It’s fully intact, looking up at him.

“Lance wouldn’t eat it,” Hunk says.  “But I swear, it’s delicious.”

“...Huh.  Looks...interesting.  Thanks, Hunk. You didn’t need to do this.”

“Nah, you’re our buddy,” Hunk says, sitting beside him and tossing an arm over his shoulder.  “You okay? You look keyed up still.”

“Could it be the fish eyes?”  Pidge and Lance chuckle lowly.

“Okay, you guys can’t judge,” Hunk frowns as he kicks his feet out.  “You didn’t even try it.” He nods for Keith to continue.

“I’m fine,” he says wearily.  “I must be sick or something lately; I’ve just been...”  He heaves a sigh.

“Nah, Krolia’s just been moody lately.  You know how she gets. It’s nothing personal.”

It is though, but Keith just shoves his face full of more food.  It’s kind of disturbing, but it’s actually not that bad.

“What were you guys arguing about?”  Hunk asks. “Wanna talk about it?”

“No.”

“Really?”  Lance says.  “Because Pidge overheard some of it and she says you were asking about your parents.”

“Lance!”  Pidge elbows him in the ribs.

“What!  I thought you said you were going to tell him that -”

“- _Lance_ ,” she hisses again.

Keith rubs at his forehead wearily as Hunk chuckles as he watches them.  “It’s fine. I don’t care. But I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Keith,” Pidge steps forward hesitantly.  She purses her lips. “I just want to tell you...  If you were hunting for info for your parents...I mean...maybe I could help you look.”

“And me,” Lance points to his chest.

“And also me,” Hunk says.

Keith looks between them all.  He sighs. “...It’s fine, guys. They’re dead.  They’ve been dead. It’s not like knowing about them will bring them back...”

“Might bring you some peace,” Lance shrugs.  “But hey, you can always share my mom with me.  She loves the heck out of you.”

She admires Keith and respects him, that much is true.  Does she love him like a mother loves a son? No. You cannot force that sort of love and Keith thinks it, bitterly.  The offer was meant to help, but it only hurts, twisting up his thoughts even more.

“It’s fine, guys,” he says again.

“We’re worried about you, Keith,” Pidge whispers.  “You’ve seemed upset lately. Disappearing for full days at a time.  Asking weird questions when you do show up, face more drained each time...  And that's fine, it’s totally fine, but we want to help you if we can.”

He sucks at his lip.  “I know. I know who to come to if I want to ask.”

“I just don’t understand why Krolia wouldn’t tell you about your own parents,” Hunk says.  “She, out of everyone you’d think would understand...”

Keith tries to press away the frown that keeps growing on his brow.

“Didn’t she used to be really close with them?  I always assumed that’s sort of why she took you under her wing,” Lance says.

“Yeah,” Keith mutters.  “You know Krolia. ‘It’s the _now_ that matters’ is something she’s always maintained...”

“A little hypocritical,” Pidge tries gently.  “Especially around this time.”

“I can’t blame her,” Keith says softly.

“No,” Pidge agrees quietly.

“Me neither.”

“Or me.”

They all sigh together.

“It’s fine,” Keith says after a while.  “Thanks for the meal.”

They look to him, recognizing their dismissal.

“Don’t forget,” Pidge says.  “If you need anything...”

“Right, I won’t forget.  I’ll see you out there tonight.”

They hesitate at the door, sharing an uncomfortable look.  “Um, Keith?” Hunk starts hesitantly. “She said you weren’t coming this time.  That you needed extra rest. ...Is that...uh, is that not right?”

He blinks.  He’s never been left behind on a full mission before.  The little ones, sure, why would they waste his time? But the big ones?  Never. Since he started going out on hunts when he was twelve - the youngest of any of them - he’s always been front and center.

It stings, he won’t deny.  And he feels that great chasm between him and Krolia widen just a bit more.  He stares down into it, helpless.

He takes a deep breath.  “Oh,” he forces out. “Okay...  Right. Good luck out there, then.”

“Sorry, Keith...”  Pidge whispers.

“Bye, Keith,” they all murmur, frowns on their faces and uneasiness in their posture.  He closes the door and locks it, face discontent.

So now Krolia’s leaving him behind...?  Is it a decision made from pettiness? Or is she right to do it...?  Is this just because he wanted to know about his parents?

He heaves a sigh.  No. She’s right. His head’s been a mess lately; anyone would leave him behind.  He’s a liability at this point.

But...she’s just never done it before...

He doesn’t know what to do with himself.  He no longer _feels_ like himself.  He feels like someone else and everyone else can see the change in him too and are staring at it in disgust.  Like maybe the vampire sitting on the bed inside his room is a big shift in his future maybe. Like things are changing.  Like his mind is changing.

He doesn’t know if he wants it or not.

He walks over to the vampire who’s just sitting there, always uncomfortable, never knowing what to do.  If he’s going to stay, like a pet or something, Keith can’t just neglect him.

Keith was downed, fully under its spell of compulsion.  Completely. The vampire was only a foot away. The things he could’ve done, but didn’t...  Keith hasn’t decided what that means in terms of trust yet, but maybe allowing the vampire a bit more freedom wouldn’t be unbelievably foolish...

“The others don’t usually come here,” Keith says to Shiro, who looks up in confusion.  “So, I mean...if you wanted to leave this room and look around the rest of the attic during the night, you’re welcome to it.  There are more books out here,” Keith mutters, pointing out into the room behind the curtain. “I...collect a lot of them.”

“...Really?”  Shiro says on a breath of apprehension.  “You don’t mind?”

Keith shakes his head slowly, watching the emotions flit through Shiro’s face.  “During the day, it’s not safe to come out here. I can close the curtains but they’re not that great, it will most likely still burn...”

“Day is strange,” Shiro murmurs.  “I can hardly keep my eyes open during the day anyway.  It’s getting better, but...”

“It’ll become easier as time goes on...or so I hear.  At night then, if I’m not around, as long as you stay inside the attic and don’t go out...you’ll be okay.  I’ll keep the door locked from now on. Just...don’t let yourself be seen. It’d be a disaster if that happened.  They will not give you mercy. They’ll kill you on the spot and not think twice. You’re not human to them anymore.”

“I understand.  Thank you, Keith.  And if you ever change your mind...”

Keith raises his eyebrows as he sees Shiro hesitate.  “What? I can just kill you? I think you and I both know I can’t seem to do it...”

“I...”  Shiro turns away, thoughts tangled in his eyes.

“Just don’t get caught,” Keith sighs.  “It’ll be hell for me too.”

“Right.”  Shiro looks down at his legs hesitantly.  Very carefully, he pulls himself out of the bed.

He trembles.  It looks awful, like he might fall apart.

“...The offer still stands,” Keith says as he watches him try.  “I can bring back an animal for you. You’ll feel a lot better.”

Shiro shakes his head as he concentrates.  “I can’t give in to this...” Shiro whispers.

“You can’t go back.”

“If your mentor or friends find out I’m here, you won’t be able to go back either.”  His hand clutches to the wall tightly as he takes a step forward. “I’m fine. Is it safe to go out?”

“It’s night,” Keith says, pushing the curtain back and leading the way as Shiro follows, turning his eyes around the attic curiously.  “There’s not much here besides books or the alchemy set. ...You’re free to try to work out a cure. I swear it doesn’t exist though... We’ve lost so many to vampires.  My friend, Pidge, she’s a genius and even she can’t figure it out. And Allura, she’s an actual witch, it runs through her veins, and she’s never had any luck either. If there was a cure, we would’ve found it.”

“I know,” Shiro says, eyes dimming.  “Trust me. I’ve searched too.”

“But healing potions, maybe some sort of way to feed yourself...  I have a big collection of herbs and miscellaneous ingredients in the cupboards and you’re free to use any of them.  Anything here, really, is open for your use. ...The way you’re walking; you look like you’re still in pain. Might I suggest this recipe,” Keith says, heaving a huge book from beneath the alchemy table and letting it drop with a big poof.  Slowly, Shiro makes his way up the stairs and follows him. He flicks through the pages and stops at one. Dog ears it. “Krolia had to torture a vampire once. This kept it alive for as long as she needed it.”

Shior looks down at the page uncertainty and then back to Keith, who has walked to the other side of the room to grab his boots.

“...And where will you go?”  Shiro asks as he lifts a small tin wolf trinket Keith has shoved in a shelf.  He turns it over and touches his finger to the end of its tail.

“I’m going out.”  He rolls his jaw as he sees the way Shiro reacts internally - a flash of the eyes.  Obviously, he’d been listening to his earlier conversation. Keith says, “I always go out.  I’m not going to let... _whatever this is_ hold me back.  I... I need to do this.”

Shiro smiles faintly, turning his eyes to the books.  “Latin... You know Latin?”

“Only what I’ve taught myself.”

“Interesting,” Shiro whispers, running his hand over the spine.  “If only everyone knew that their unbreakable bloodthirsty warrior Keith Kogane, our angel, our savior, stubbornly refused orders from his mentors and taught himself Latin...had a room that was full of more books than anything else...and weird wolf figurines.  Who would’ve ever guessed?”

Keith would’ve been insulted if Shiro hadn’t said it so softly, the faintest hint of a smile on his face.  Keith watches him for a moment longer. “...Is there anything you want out there that I can get for you?”

“No,” Shiro murmurs, his attention turned to all the books.  He looks happy for once, almost excited.

“Okay.  I’ll be back later then.”  Keith turns, pushing out of the room, locking the door, and going down the staircase.

When he makes his way into the foyer, he sees they’re already gone.  He tsks as he looks around at the tables and counters for any sign of where they’ve headed off to.  He starts when someone comes downstairs.

It’s Acxa.  She stops and stares, brow furrowing.  “...What are you still doing here? Krolia already left.”

“Ah.  Right, um, where to again?”

She tilts her head, suspicion growing.  “...She didn’t tell you...? Why not?”

He points out the door.  “I should go in case they need help, but where to?”

She’s shaking her head slowly.  “She didn’t tell you. What happened?  She always brings you.”

“Acxa, come on,” Keith sighs.  “What if she needs help? Just tell me.”

“Mmm, no.  Not until you tell me what’s going on.”

“ _Acxa_.”

There’s the sound of a door creaking open from up above and Keith tilts his head up to see Kolivan standing on the second story, hands on the railing.

“Why are you two arguing?”

“Kolivan,” Keith greets him.  Keith can see the understanding running through Kolivan immediately at the sight of Keith’s antsy face.

“...It’s that time of the year already?”  Kolivan heaves a sigh.

“Twentieth anniversary,” Keith confirms.  “She’s been worse than usual this time.”

Kolivan heaves another sigh, rubbing a hand over his face.  “Every damn year... She thinks she’s over it...” He’s quiet for awhile.  “Tell her I sent you. I want you to look after her. Here are the coordinates.”  He grabs a piece of paper from his breast pocket and tosses it down to Keith. “Be careful.  Krolia wouldn’t be able to take it if anything happened to you too.”

Krolia won’t even tell him about his parents, the only thing he’s ever asked for.  He thinks maybe she cares a little less than he had always assumed. But he nods and flashes a weary smile, leaving the foyer and going off into the night.  He hesitates right out the door, looking back. “Hey, Kolivan?”

“What is it?”

“I was wondering...vampires were human once...  Lance - he got bitten the other day. If we didn’t have the antidote and he turned...I mean, would it still be him?  Or would he change?”

Kolivan’s expression hardens and Keith presses his lips together tightly.  He can see the look Acxa’s giving him, like he just grew a second head.

“I guess I’m asking: would we have had to kill Lance...if he had turned?”  Keith murmurs, looking away. He stares down at the shadows his silhouette casts on the floor as the moon hangs high behind him.

Keith can’t take the silence that hangs between the three of them.  How neither of them will answer, only stare. He asks again, quieter, “are all vampires bad?”

Finally, Kolivan says, voice hard, “ask your parents.”

Keith closes his eyes and leaves.

 

The coordinates bring him further out than he expected, in the center of the two opposing factions, closer to Lotor’s land.  He doesn’t like it. Lotor is dangerous in the way he pretends to play to their side. Keith knows he does not; it’s a feeling.  He suspects Krolia feels the same way as Keith does, but she feigns trust to cap Keith’s complaints. Because no matter how you spin it, being unable to trust the neighboring faction is dangerous.  If they didn’t share info, the townsfolk’s safety would be at even greater risk. So they must walk this fine line, watchfully, carefully, and just hope it doesn’t explode in their face.

Krolia finds him before he finds her.  Keith’s walking through shadows, thinking he’s being careful and suddenly, there’s a knife to his neck.  He had heard and seen absolutely nothing.

“I thought you said you were careful,” she breathes, pulling back and frowning at him.  She frowns in disapproval, and beneath that is something sharper, more personal. “You let your guard down.”

He rubs at his neck.  “You’re just quieter than the rest.”

She sighs heavily, shaking her head.  “Keith, I told you to stay behind.”

“Kolivan told me to come.  Don’t worry, I won’t get in your way.  Where are the others? I’ll join them.”

“You can’t.  I sent them home.”

He blinks.  “What? You were just going to do this on your own?”

She’s not worried.  “The main group broke from this one and left.  Now, there are only two of them. Honestly, we could probably just leave them.  The traps here would be enough.”

“You’re here _alone_ ?  What about the necessary precautions you’re always drilling into our heads.”  Keith whispers. “You’re worried about me? I’m worried about _you_.

“It’s been twenty years,” he whispers into the night.  “Krolia... You have to let them go... At least enough to function normally around this time.  I don’t want to lose you either.”

She looks over at him, eyes impassive.  She holds his gaze. Quietly, she says, “...You take the right side.  I’ll take the left. The damn place is like a maze. Have you heard of it? They used to take vampires here to kill them. The fact that these vampires are here means they’re desperate or lost.  No sane vampire would come here. It’s littered in traps.”

“Any I need to worry about?”

“Yes,” she says.  “I want them alive.”  She disappears off into the night.

Right.  Great. At least the place is something beautiful to look at as he passes through the old ruins.  It’s falling apart, but for its age, Keith can’t deny that he’s impressed by how sturdy the walls are still holding up, or how the vines and flowers crawl up the structures and cradle the place softly.  It looks and feels sacred here. Like some sort of god is looking over them, like they’re safe here.

Traps though.  Keith spots them out because Krolia’s drilled them into his head since he was a kid.  The ones that apply to him are easy enough to step around or ignore. A rope here. A sunken in tile there.  But then he sees many more for vampires. The mirrors hanging in the trees, waiting to collect sunlight. The strings that had once held garlic, back in the days.  And the crosses. A vampire _would_ have to be very stupid to come here.  Keith starts doubting they’ll even find them here.

Was this another lead from Lotor...?  Keith wouldn’t be surprised. He’s probably off in the near distance, waiting, laughing.

Keith doesn’t like the way Lotor makes him feel.  There’s always that sharp glint in his eyes, like he’s always up to something.  Keith’s intuition is left screaming with alarms.

He wishes Allura would take over again, but he supposes that’s impossible.  Not since the Altean faction was wiped out. Not since she fell into her despair, sticky and overwhelming.  Keith gets it. But her father had been good about bridging the peace. Allura too, as she began to step into her role. And then everything fell apart.  She could do a lot of good if she wanted. But she doesn’t.

He steps into a large long room.  It looks more like a temple than anything else, but a strange one, if that.  A long pillar lines up in the center, stretching up into the ceiling that opens in a strange gaping hole above it, letting light in.  Thick heavy curtains are pulled up around the perimeter of it, old and worn through in parts, but still mostly intact. The room is pasted with mirrors.  Each column around the peripheral has them - long mirrors, short, circular, triangle. They all point into the center, where the ceiling opens up for the sun.

He hears Krolia walking up to him from behind.

“Nothing?”  He asks, turning.

“Nothing...  This place is too full of traps.  It’d be suicide to stay here.”

“And who gave you the info?”  He raises an eyebrow.

“It wasn’t Lotor.  It was Allura.”

“...Oh.”  He turns back to the room.  “What’s this?”

She sighs as she looks toward the center and puts her hands on her hips.  “Always asking questions, aren’t you?”

“You know a lot and I’m naturally curious.”  When she gives him a half-amused side glance, Keith adds, “Educating me about the terrain would be very beneficial.”

“Right,” she rolls her eyes.  She sighs again, heavier than before, and soaks in the sight of the place.  “Do you remember the story about my bloodline? ...About my son?”

“You’ve mentioned it before.  Your bloodline was sacrificed to bring a century of peace to the lands.  One life for the many. Kolivan’s always been very proud of your ancestors.”

“Hm.  He thinks it’s the highest honor to give your life to protect everyone.  It happened here. They called it the Room of Mirrors. There was a story - though it’s so old that I doubt the truth of it - but a long, long time ago, centuries before now, the gods smiled on three families in particular: the head of what is now the Galra, the Alteans, and us - the Blades.  Each faction ruled over this region as a group of people in harmony, as one. The bloodline in charge of the Blades was mine.

“We were lucky and we were respected.  Then, one day, tragedy befell one of my ancestors: they were injured in a terrible accident and, despite the fear that persisted even then, they became a vampire.  It had never happened to one of us before. It was like seeing the strong imperious king of a country infected with rabies. The region went into panic. There was chaos: do they kill him and dare end the bloodline?  But the gods took pity on him. They offered him a deal to set things straight: though vampires do not normally breed with humans, his wife would become with child, and in return, to cleanse the vampirism out of his soul, he would be returned to the gods.  He really had no choice.

“They set up the mirrors so the gods could see him from the heavens through the columns of light from the sky.  And it was here, in this holy temple, he was sacrificed and returned to their gentle embrace. The gods loved him, and as they watched on, witnessing the end to his life cut too short, they wept.  Their tears fell over the land, snuffing out the life of all those who had dared do this to him.”

She smiles down at Keith.  “That’s just the story though...  But since then, my bloodline was thought to be pure and loved by the gods; the death of us in this space would bring holy rain unto the land and cleanse it of vampires.  It was supposed to be the highest honor for my ancestors. My own grandmother died here.”

No emotion sparks in her face, but she’s as still as the air around them.  Keith says softly, “...I’m sorry, Krolia.”

“I was supposed to be the next sacrifice.  But, as you know, I was attacked when I was younger and my blood became tainted.  The doctors all said I’d never bear children and I was foolish enough to believe them.  I thought it was the gods telling me something; trying to put an end to this. And then, suddenly, against all odds, I was pregnant...”

“...Krolia,” Keith whispers.  It’s all he can think to say.

“...Fate is not always kind,” she murmurs.  “It should’ve been me, but my own mistakes cost me my blood...so then it became my son.”  She’s quiet for a long moment. “I guess it doesn’t matter anymore. He’s gone.”

Keith runs his finger over his lip.  “So...in the story, your ancestor was a vampire when he got his wife pregnant?  Does that mean you’re part vampire?”

She smiles wryly.  “It’s just a story.  I’m sure it’s altered along the way, but...it’s an ironic thought, isn’t it?”

Keith looks around the place.  “So this would’ve been where you would’ve had to bring your son.”

“Yes,” she whispers.  “It’s different now than it used to be.  Back then, it sounded more like a ceremony, a gentle goodbye.  But as the vampires began to come back, people would use this place in their fear.  They’d often spill any blood in hopes it’d appease the gods. Any stray vampires that were found in between sacrifices would be brought here.  Sometimes humans that the townspeople suspected. You know back when people used to burn witches at the stake?”

“Yeah.”

“It was much like that.  It brought more fear than comfort.  They’d tie the vampires up in the center and wait for the sun to come in through the top of the ceiling.  It’d light the mirrors up and concentrate the light right here.” She pats the pillar and looks up to it, in all its vines and flowers.  It doesn’t feel heavy, like the story. Keith can hear birds chirping in the distance and feel the quiet warmth against his skin. “...The most painful way to die.  If the vampires were lucky, they’d slit their throats before that and then let the blood drain in the basin there.” She points. There’s just a mass of jasmine there now, but through it, underneath.  “But they often wouldn’t. They thought it wasn’t as potent a sacrifice then and blood letting on a vampire takes longer than a mob has the patience for.”

“Jesus,” Keith wrinkles his nose.  “What if they mistook a human for a vampire?  Obviously a human wouldn’t burst into flames when the light hits them.”

“Maybe they’d get lucky and people would believe them then.  But you know mob mentality. Most probably weren’t that lucky.”

“...Awful.”

“Yeah.  People can be sometimes.”

It’s so quiet here now.  The small blossoms that are opening up along the delicate curve of vines make no sense in that context.  He can’t even imagine.

“For the vampires though: it was what they deserved,” she says quietly.  “Some part of me wishes it was in my power to do it. Look at all the vampires around here, like some sort of infestation.  This isn’t how it should be. We should be free of this fear.”

Fear.  Keith turns his eyes to her and he sees that, yeah...yeah, she’s scared.  Isn’t that what’s driven them all to this point?

“I get it now.  I get why they would do it.  If I could give my life for others to live in harmony, for all of you,” she says softly, turning her eyes to Keith.  “...I would do it in a heartbeat.”

Keith feels something tug in his chest as he sees the softness in her eyes, something she always works so hard to hide from them all.  She always tries so hard to pretend she doesn’t have a heart, even though Keith can see as clearly as the glass around them that she does.

“...Maybe they’re not all bad,” he whispers.

The air changes around them immediately.  Her eyes sharpen and she steps closer to put her hand on Keith’s shoulder.  She leans into his face, horrified. “You mustn’t allow yourself to think that.   _Never_.  That’s exactly what they want you to think; it’ll make you easy prey.  Keith. Promise me. You must never hesitate. Too many good people have died because they thought they saw something in their hearts - but remember, their hearts don’t beat.  They don’t feel. They’re not alive anymore.”

Keith bows his head.  Licks his lips. “...I’m sorry,” he says, and he is because there’s so much pain in her eyes.

“My husband was strong and his heart was kind.  He shouldn’t have had to die like he did. I lost everything that day,” she whispers.  “...They were everything to me. Vampires aren’t good, Keith. None of them. If I could’ve done what my birthright mandated, then I promise you that I would’ve.  My family never would’ve had to die at all.”

“Why?”  Keith whispers.  “Why did they come after you?  I don’t understand.”

She sighs, her attention leaving the room and turning outward.  “One day, Keith -”

He catches her wrist before she can walk away.  “ _No_ ,” he says, eyes wide and imploring.  “Krolia... Stop hiding from me. We’re friends, aren’t we...?”

Her eyes are hurt as she looks into him.  He can see her soften. “Keith... I wish that -”  She stops. “Do you hear that?”

He shakes his head.  “No.”

She hunches down primally, eyes become sharp as her blade.  She nudges him back a little. “Stay here. There’s something on the other side.  An activated trap.”

He’s already following her.  “I can help you.”

“ _No_ , _Keith_.  This is a direct order.  Stay here. I don’t want to have to worry about you.”

“Worry about me...?”  He whispers to himself, concerned, as she runs away.  When has she ever had to worry about him...? He can take care of himself...

...Maybe it’s something in the air.  Something in the water. How have they both been so messed up in the head lately?  Become this soft and worried? This hurt? It’s like...shared pain.

He watches as she disappears into the trees, slinking through the darkness of the shadows and away.  He casts one more careful look around himself and then walks down the path a little to go sit on a wall that’s so crumbled so perfectly that it makes a nice seat.

He sits there.  He thinks about the genuine fear of vampires in Krolia’s eyes and then about Shiro, of his honest smiles and worry...and he’s not sure which is right.  As he tries to sort it out, he sees, from the corner of his vision, something flicker through the forest.

“Krolia?”  He asks hesitantly.

He turns, hand clutching his knife.

It’s not Krolia.  Krolia wouldn't be this loud.  This is someone else. Something else.

He stands quickly, running through the forest and toward the location where he sees, clutching to her leg, a small child.

No.

Not a child.  A vampire. She ran into a trap.  Her leg has been torn off. And the fear in her eyes, that he used to disregard, he sees.  He sees it like he sees it in Krolia’s eyes. They know of death. They know of pain.

She stares up at Keith and hopes for mercy, her fate in Keith’s hands.  Like Shiro’s...before he saved Keith. And Keith doesn’t regret saving Shiro, not like Krolia said he would.

“Please,” she whispers as he stands over her, clinging to his knife.  “Please don’t hurt me.” Her eyes are wide and bright in the moonlight.  She’s trembling, her long golden ringlets bobbing as she scoots back, trying to put distance between them.  “I won’t hurt anyone,” she says. She’s just a child. She can’t be more than nine. “I promise I’ll leave everyone alone.”

What if she _feels_ like Shiro does?  What if Krolia’s just been consumed with fear all this time, never realizing that they could be good too?  That they aren’t always evil.

 _Stay back_ , she tells Keith because she’s afraid of what could happen.  But what if it’s something _good_?

“My name’s Keith,” he hears himself saying slowly.  “...What’s yours?”

“Evelyn,” she breathes.  She holds up a hand to him, as if she can ward him off.  Her fingers are so small, so dainty and fragile. “Please.  Let me go. My mom, she’s hurt too. If you can just let us go, you’ll never see us again.”

“I...”  A mother? A child?  A real family? Does she rock Evelyn in her arms for comfort?  Are they all they have left in this world?

 _Liars_ , Krolia’s voice whispers in his head.  But then he thinks of Pidge saying, _I don’t really think their minds change at all_ and he thinks of Lance, being bitten...if he had changed...could Keith have found it within himself to kill Lance too?  Could he pretend it wasn’t Lance actually begging him?

Animals have families.  Why wouldn't vampires? Keith wants to _help_ people.

“...Go,” Keith hears himself whisper to the girl.  “... _Go_...”

Her eyes widen in confusion like she can’t actually believe it, but then she pulls herself up.  She says, “my mom’s over there,” and she points toward the Room of Mirrors. “I’ll go get her and then we’ll -”

She takes a step forward, closer to him, and then, so quickly he can’t even blink, she grabs him tightly by the wrist, sinking her teeth into the pulse point.

He’s not sure why he’s so surprised by it, but he is.  He doesn’t even have time to call for Krolia before something hits him hard from behind like a tree, knocking him to the ground.

And he thinks, with so much regret in his heart, how Krolia was _right_.

“Hold him,” he hears an older woman saying quickly as a hand comes down over his mouth.  There’s a knee in his back and his legs and arms are pinned. He’s never been in this bad of a position before and it happened so quickly.  He can feel himself vulnerable as they grab his head and push it to the side.

Death has not even really been a thought to Keith.  He's always followed Krolia's rules. He's always trusted himself.  And here he is, right at the end of Death's gaze.

“You drink first until he’s close,” she says.  “And then I’ll make him drink from me.”

His eyes widen.  They’re not going to kill him.

He fights harder, trying to struggle out of their grip, but it’s no use.  They cling their hands into his hair and shove his head down harder. The terror rises up in him.  Death seems like a kindness in comparison to what he's faced with now.

 _Krolia_ , he tries to scream but it’s too muffled, too soft beneath her hand.  He doesn’t even know where his knife is anymore.

He feels, with a nasty shock throughout his entire body, as breath glances across his exposed neck.  They're actually going to do it. He hesitated and this is what happens.

Something sharp pierces through the skin of his neck.

It’s a strange numbness that fills him immediately.  Stuffs itself into his lungs, pulls at the feeling in his brain.  It’s like those seconds before sleep claims you, where you’re so exhausted you can’t even keep your eyelids open anymore.

He feels the fight leave him, his senses wash away.  He’s just laying out susceptible beneath their hands, being sucked dry and he can’t even find a will to fight.

It’s bitter and sharp and he knows he should fight, but he _can’t_.  He doesn’t have to worry about everything anymore...  God knows...he’s so...tired...of worrying about everything...  About everyone... He can’t do it anymore.

His throat _burns_.

And then he’s wrenched back to the sharp bitter cold, pain lancing through the side of his neck and shoulder.  Someone’s slapping his face hard.

“ _Keith_!”  Krolia’s yelling.

He pulls his eyebrows together hard and tries to speak, but he’s putty still, that awful weight sitting heavily in his veins.

“Keith, keep it together.  Hold this. _Hold it_.”  She shoves something in his hands and then shoves his arm up, pressing it hard to his neck.  He chokes against the sudden pain. It falls from his grip. “Dammit,” she hisses. She shifts him and ties it tightly around his neck.  “I’m going to carry you, okay?”

He mumbles something, but he’s not sure what.  He looks up at her face, at the pain there as she scans the distance.

“Sorry...”  He breathes.  He can’t focus well enough to see, but he can make out distantly, the two still figures beside him, bathed in carnage.

Her eyes flick down to his as she gently lifts him.  She says softly, “Stay awake, okay? ...They got you pretty good.  You’ll be okay, but just...just don’t fall asleep, alright? ...Keith?”

“...Okay,” he murmurs, leaning his head into her shoulder.  She’s so warm... So warm and soft and he feels _safe_.  He thinks...if he ever were to have had time with his mother, this is probably what it would’ve felt like.  Cared for. Loved. He’s so happy. He just -

“ _Keith_!”  Krolia’s shaking him awake again, hard, and he grits against it.

He bites back a sob because it _hurts so much_ and he wants to tell her to stop shaking him.  It’s making it worse, but no words come out.

“Stay _awake_ or you will _die_.  This isn’t like Lance’s wound.  This is serious. Do you understand me?  Can you hear me?”

He rolls his head back and tries to focus on the stars above.  At the way the moon hangs there, a steady constant. It hurts to be awake.

But Krolia is warm, pressed against the side of him as she holds onto him in her tight sturdy grip.

Keith forces himself to stay awake.  He thinks of Lance. How his mother held him and cradled him gently.  He thinks of Pidge and Matt, how Colleen always opens her arms wide for them and tosses a sympathetic look to Keith and makes room for him too.  He always shakes his head gently, takes a step back. He thinks of how he wouldn’t mind if once...just once, Krolia would admit that she loves him too.  He thinks of how he wishes she could fill the hole in his heart, how he could do the same for her if only she’d let him in. It could be so easy for them...  He thinks of how she’s too scared to. And this is probably why.

 


	4. Chapter 4

He wakes up stiff and sore.  He’s lying in his bed, the curtains pulled back and light streaming into his room.

“Heeey, Keith,” Pidge is whispering above him.  He blinks up at her in confusion, frowning as she smiles softly down at him.  “Looks like you’re mortal after all.”

He groans, reaching up to touch at the itchiness on his neck, but she catches his hand and moves it back away.  “Stop. You’re still pretty weak. You’re taking a long time to heal. ...Can’t believe you let that happen to you, Keith.”

He huffs out a breath.  “Shiro...?” He asks, looking down at the bed he’s on.  “Where is he?”

“Shiro?”  Pidge rocks back, frowning.  “Who is that?”

“The...the...”   _Vampire_ , he almost says, but he catches himself just in time.  He blinks up at Pidge, tries to see how much she’s understanding from this, but she doesn’t seem to take him seriously.  She goes back to the bottles on his nightstand.

“Got a new alchemist or something?  Allura’s going to be hurt.”

He shakes his head as he sees what she’s pointing at.  The bottles Shiro must’ve made. “I dunno,” he mumbles.

“I wasn’t using them at first because I didn’t know who the hell this ‘Shiro’ is and whether or not I could trust him.  But they’re pretty damn good. I’ve got to admit that I’m impressed. Better than mine, I think. Where is this mysterious alchemist anyway?  Where’d you find them?”

He just shakes his head wearily and closes his eyes again.

Pidge is quiet for awhile.  “...Krolia hasn’t been out of her room since it’s happened.  ...You should’ve seen her bring you in. I thought you had turned and she had to kill you...  I think, with the date and everything, and for this to happen to you... I’ve never gotten the chills so badly from watching someone.  She was...”

“Sorry,” Keith says again.  Feels the guilt rise up in his throat and strangle him.  Tears well up in his eyes.

He had been such a fool.  He thought he knew better than Krolia, and then...

“Keith, it’s okay,” Pidge says soothingly, brushing his bangs away from his face.  “It happens to everyone. Even Krolia’s mortal, you know?”

“It’s my fault.  I didn’t listen. I hesitated.  ...I’ve never done that. I thought...  I thought maybe...” He presses his lips together tightly to bar more emotion from welling up.

She keeps brushing his hair back.  “...Maybe she was right to keep you home the other day, hm?”

“Yeah,” he says softly.

“You’re just _so stubborn_.”

“Sorry, Pidge...”

“Don’t apologize to me.  I get to hang out with my buddy, what’s so bad about that?  Now, go back to sleep. You get all weepy when you’re tired. And then you get embarrassed when you wake up.  I mean, _I_ don’t mind, but I know you do.”

He chuckles wetly.  “...Yeah. I don’t feel good...  I haven’t...in awhile.”

She turns her face to him seriously, the light fading out of her eyes.  Her hands pause in the air, holding a clean bandage to replace his old ones.  “...What does that mean, Keith?”

“It means I hate this,” Keith grits his teeth, more tears welling up in his eyes.  “I hate this... I don’t want to do this anymore. I don’t want to kill anyone anymore.”

“Oh...”  She whispers, her eyes widening in shock that she tries to mellow out.  “Like...just for now, or...?”

“Never.  I’ve never wanted it.  I hate seeing the pain on their faces; I hate feeling them slouching limply off the end of my blade.  It’s horrible.”

“Oh, Keith... I - I didn’t know... I had no idea.  Is that why...” She gestures to him. “All of this?”

He closes his eyes tightly.  He can’t stand to see her face.  “Don’t tell Krolia. Don’t tell anyone else.  Please. Please, they can’t know.”

She nods slowly.  “...But... Shouldn’t you tell them?  If you hate it, they’d want to know. You can’t just keep forcing yourself.”

“And leave all of you to it?”  Keith whispers. “...Everyone’s relying on me.  Krolia, Kolivan, you guys, the townspeople... I can’t just... _stop_.”

“But if you keep going and hurt yourself -”

He shakes his head roughly.  “No. You’re right. I’m so tired.  I become pathetic when I’m like this.  Just ignore me, Pidge. I’m going to try to get some rest.”

“...But, Keith...”

He closes his eyes and turns away from her.

She takes the hint, going back to redressing his wounds.  She whispers. “I know it’s...not exactly what you want, but...you know we’re always here for you.”

“I know, Pidge,” he whispers back softly.  “I know... Thank you for being here.”

She sighs, her breath flickering across the candle’s light.  “Goodnight, Keith.”

 

The next time he wakes up, it’s Shiro who’s beside him.  The moon is out. He has a book in his lap but he’s not reading it, he’s looking up and away, out into the night sky.  He doesn’t even notice Keith watching him. He bites at his lip, his eyes shining with thoughts. He runs his finger along the scar of his nose like it itches.

Keith doesn’t recognize the book in his hand.  He barely recognizes his room. He’s dizzy and weak.  Shouldn’t the antidote be working already? He feels worse than before.

He tries to pretend it isn’t happening.

“What are you reading...?”  He asks softly.

Shiro jumps, book flinging from his hand and toppling to the floor.  “Oh,” he says. “Keith. You’re awake. How are you feeling?”

He tries to move, but he’s slow and heavy.  He cringes. Keith tries to blink himself awake.

“...Are you in pain?”  Shiro looks to the nightstand where several newly replenished bottles lie.  Keith can see the darkness of them on Shiro’s fingers and it confuses him.

“Have you been taking care of me?”  He whispers out, brow furrowed.

Shiro blinks, looking up.  “...Yes. ...They all left. It looked like you were getting better yesterday and they said you’d be waking up soon.  They left a note,” he says, reaching onto the dresser and holding it out to him.

Keith cringes as he reaches out for it, slowly trying to process what the words say.  It takes so long to even focus his eyes and when he gets to that point, the words start sliding across the page.  He realizes it’s not the words at all, but his focus. He falls back onto the pillows.

Shiro says lowly, “...I think...you’re not getting better.”

“Worse,” Keith whispers.  “I feel so much worse.”

Shiro leans over him, reaching his hands out for Keith’s face.  He presses the back of his hand to Keith’s forehead, feeling for fever.

“...Do you still feel heat...?”  Keith wonders.

Shiro chuckles softly.  “Yeah. I do. ...You’re burning...  Let me make something for your fever -”

Keith grabs his wrist tightly in his hand, stopping Shiro in his tracks.  Shiro casts his eyes down to Keith’s, blinking in surprise. Always so surprised...

Keith stares up into his eyes...they’re so beautiful in the moonlight like this...and he lets himself bathe in that pull.  His beauty is so intense; Keith’s not sure how he can ever stand in the face of it and not be pulled in.

He tries to tug Shiro forward, but his strength isn’t quite there.  Shiro gets it anyway.

“No,” Shiro whispers, turning his eyes away quickly.  “No, I’m sorry. I don’t mean it.”

Keith tightens his grip.  “Don’t run away.” The words burn his throat.  “Please just...stay with me...”

Shiro shakes his head, still not looking at him.  He swallows hard. “This isn’t you, Keith. This is my fault. Try to calm down.  Try to focus.”

He does try.  He does. But he feels it still even if he can’t see Shiro’s face.  He just feels it in his gut. “Please,” he begs, but he’s not even sure what it is he wants.  Any of it. All of it. Whatever Shiro will give to him.

Shiro shakes his head harder, gently trying to pry Keith’s hand from his wrist.  “Keith, trust me. This is the last thing you really want.”

Everyone always tells him what it is he feels.  He’s sick of it. He wants to choose for himself sometimes too.  He tugs Shiro’s arm down harder, using him as an anchor, and he pulls himself up to reach him.

Shiro turns in surprise, not expecting the strength, and Keith uses that to his advantage, taking Shiro’s mouth for his own.

Keith’s mind is hazy.  He’s not really sure what’s happening.  He vaguely remembers his situation, that he probably shouldn’t be doing this, but he’s relying more on feeling tonight, not memory.  He just feels...like he wants this. That Shiro is someone soft and sweet and welcoming and Keith has always longed for that. So this time, for the first time in his life, he’s going to let himself have it.

He doesn’t want to kill anymore.  He just wants peace and he can find it in this.

He tries to move his mouth against Shiro’s.  He tries to kiss him just as he wants it. He wants his body against Shiro’s, he wants Shiro to take him, but Shiro pulls back quickly, as if burned.

“No,” he says firmly, pressing his hand over Keith’s mouth.  “Trust me. You don’t want this.”

“Yes, I do -”

“I’m sorry,” Shiro says, pulling himself to his feet and stumbling away.  “I’m working on it. I don’t know how to control it...” He stands at the doorway, feet away, staring in hesitantly, eyes knotted in conflict.

Shiro murmurs one last time, “...I’ll...make you something for that fever.”

Keith sighs with loss, watching him leave.  The curtain falls over the doorway and he’s gone.  He does feel feverish and a little drunk. His neck aches and he’s weak, susceptible.  That’s what this is. Keith, the vampire hunter, would never kiss a vampire. Not on purpose. Not as anything but a victim.

Keith?  A victim?  Well, that’s why he’s laying out on his bed with a gash in the side of his neck.  But somehow, wanting Shiro feels different. Somehow, he can’t push it away.

 

When he wakes up next, blearily, he is immediately welcomed into consciousness by the sight of Krolia at his bedside.  She’s seated in front of him, staring down with a grave look sitting firmly on her brow. She has her knife in her hand, fingers clenched around it tightly.  Her eyes are heavily guarded.

“What’s wrong...?”  He breathes, voice rasping.  And he realizes, with a jolt, how bad he sounds.

Worse.  Much worse.

He’s panting, body feverish, looking up at her.  He’s not getting better. The antidote isn’t working.  He goes cold inside as he thinks about what that means.

He feels someone behind him, but when he goes to turn on his side to see, Krolia leans forward to stop him.  She places a hand on his neck and he hisses, whole body tensing.

“I’m sorry, Keith,” she says.  “We were negligent. The antidote wasn’t enough.  The poison’s spread.”

He can feel a chill running up his chest.  He blinks quickly. “...What does that mean...?”

“...It means they succeeded in forcing you to drink their blood and I didn’t realize.  We miscalculated the dose.” Her eyes go up to the person behind him, grim, like she's holding back, and Keith shivers, reaching out for her hand.

“Don’t, Keith,” she whispers, turning her eyes away, scooting her hands closer to her core, away from him.

He’s scared.  He’s never been this scared.  He chokes out, “It’s happening then?  I’m going to turn? You’ll kill me?” For some reason, even though he’s always known, he can’t stand the thought.

There’s something awful in her eyes.  Something torn up in knots and bitterness.  She closes them tightly. “It hasn’t happened yet.  We’re going to give you another dose but...we’ve...we’ve never done it twice in a row before.  Your veins are full of it... we don’t know how much more to give you. Too much and you die. But too little and it’ll be too late.”  She grits her teeth so hard Keith can hear it. “If only there was something else we could do... This _isn’t working_ .  Nothing’s working.  Why would _more_ of it do anything? _”_

Keith closes his eyes.  He had even felt it at the time, the burning down his throat.  He’s so stupid. “I want you to do it...” Keith says, staring up at her face.  “Krolia... If I turn...”

“ _Keith_ ,” she spits out like a curse.  Her hand trembles on the knife. She still won’t look at him as she grits out, “Kolivan, are you almost ready?”  He can make out the others behind her, hanging out in the doorway, the moonlight shining through the curtains. He wonders vaguely where Shiro is.  If he’s left.

“Hey, Keith.”  Pidge is the only one brave enough to whisper.  “It’s going to be okay. Be strong, okay? You’ll make it through.”

“Th-the antidote burns but...it goes away soon, so it’ll be fine,” Lance nods.  But Keith notices he’s still been hunched over from the pain lately and how pale he looks watching him.

Keith reaches out and clings to Krolia’s wrist before she can jerk away.  She finally looks to him, eyes wide with hurt. He looks up into them and he can feel her terror there.  “Krolia... Krolia, if I -”

“-Stop,” she says harshly.  She shakes her head and presses her mouth together in one tight line, eyes closed firmly.  “We’re going to give you this antidote and it will hurt for awhile...and then you’ll get better.  Understand?”

He nods slowly.

“You’re not going to die.  That’s an order,” she whispers.

He gives her arm a soft squeeze, smiling weakly.  “...Understood.”

She pats his hand once and then reaches out for whatever Kolivan’s been preparing.  “I’ll be the one to do it,” she says softly. She runs her hand over Keith’s cheek with soft care.  “Be brave, Keith. Like I know you are... When you get better, I’ll tell you all you want to know, okay?”  She says, brushing back his hair, “see you on the other side.”

“Okay,” he whispers.  “See you. Krolia.”

She brings the cold tip of the needle to his neck, which is pulsing with pain.  He feels it pierce his skin. He feels all the muscles in his body tense up. Lance was right - it burns.  It’s awful and bitter and claws at him from all angles.

He tries not to crumble beneath the pain or make a sound, he knows how it’d hurt Krolia.  But he forgets about that anyway.

And then he’s out.

 

It’s awhile before he’s conscious again, and he doesn’t necessarily feel any better, but he feels more like himself.

It’s Pidge at his bedside again, feet kicked up and biting out of a pear as she reads.

Her eyes flick up to his and she grins, cheeks full.  “Hey, sleeping beauty,” she says around her mouthful of food.  “Had enough with the dramatics lately?”

“...Ugh.”

“Mm.  You look like shit...but you’re still you.  That’s all we can ask for.”

“Still me,” he murmurs, running his fingers over his eyes.

“How are you feeling now?”

He shifts a little, trying to test his neck without actually moving it.  “...Hurts,” he decides. “But it’s better. Where’s Krolia?”

She watches his face for a long while, something vulnerable and sad in her eyes.  “She’s out. She’s been...” She clears her throat, pauses, falls out of the conversation.  “I dunno,” she murmurs.

His brow knits together at her expression.  "What is it?"

“...I thought she was really going to do it,” she says softly.  “I thought she would have to kill you in front of us. She waited over your body for so long.  I don’t think I’ve ever been so mad. ...I wouldn’t be able to forgive her if she had done it.”

He stares at the ceiling for a long while.  The candelabra is at the end of its life and it is starting to dim.  Nothing lasts. “What if I tried to kill you first?”

“Would you?”  Pidge whispers.  “...I don’t think you would.”

“If I did?”

“...I don’t know, Keith,” she whispers again, looking down darkly.  “You’re...you’re you. Even if you had changed, I...”

“Pidge, you can’t do that.  There won’t be time to think.  It wouldn’t be me anymore. You’d have to -”

She shakes her head.  “If it were _me_?”

He stops and presses his lips together.

“If I seemed like me?  If I were begging you not to hurt me?”

He’s quiet.  “I could stop you,” he says softly.

“What if you couldn’t?  I wouldn’t be me anymore, right?  I’d be a vampire.” She’s quiet for awhile.  “I... I thought she was going to do it. I thought we’d have to see you put down, right in your bed, by the person who raised you.  I...” She lets out a small shaky breath.

“She would,” Keith says.  “She’s always maintained she would.  And that’s just how it is. I wouldn’t expect anything less.  We would have to do the same for her. It’s what she’d want. It’s how we’d keep people _safe_.”

She’s still shaking her head, face distraught as she grits her teeth.  “But you...you looked so scared. How could she -”

“-So did the ones who did this to me,” Keith says sharply.  He closes his eyes. “...They looked _terrified_ .  And I tried to let her go,” Keith presses a hand to his face.  “I told her to get her mother and _go_ and the second I let my guard down she did exactly what Krolia said she would and she _got the best of me_ .  I knew better,” he says lowly.  “I _knew_ and it didn’t matter because I didn’t listen.”

Pidge is silent.

“Pidge.  I don’t care if I beg.  I don’t care if I sound like myself, if I look like myself.  If I ever turn,” Keith says firmly. “Don’t hesitate. Don’t even let yourself _think_ about it, just _do it_ .  Kill me.  Please. I’m begging you.  ...This... _sucks_.  I don’t want it to happen to any of you...or worse.”

She bites at her lip for a moment and then sighs.  She pats his arm. “...You _do_ look awful.”

“Thanks,” he mutters.

“...Lucky for that Shiro guy.”

He blinks, looking over.

She frowns at his surprise.  “Didn’t...-? ...The alchemist, right?  He found the messenger in town and had him come after us.  We were gone. It would’ve been too late otherwise. He found you here, sick.  The message...he told us you told him where to find us.”

Keith parts his lips.

“Did you not...?”

“No, I...  I think I do remember that...  I must’ve got it confused for a dream.”

Pidge is still giving him a look, but she lets it go, turning to the bottles to uncork them.

Shiro brought them here.  Shiro, the vampire. Saving Keith from a vampire bite...again.  Retrieving the help that Keith needed even if it was a risk to himself.

Keith’s is so fucking confused.  He doesn’t know what to think.

He stares up into the ceiling...and wonders.

 

Keith heaves himself out of bed, cringing against the pain in his entire body.  It’s almost morning, the sun is peeking through the curtains and warming the attic.  But Shiro’s not here. Keith takes it slowly, walking up the steps with careful precision.

“Shiro...?”  He murmurs in the room.

“I’m up here,” Keith hears.  He frowns as he walks around and sees Shiro up more steps, hunched over the alchemy table.

“Wow,” Keith murmurs as he makes his way over.  “You really take this seriously, don’t you?”

He smiles down at Keith warmly.  “This is what I used to do when I was human.  It’s soothing somehow knowing I can still do it...and the quality of the herbs you have is amazing.  I love to see it work. How are you feeling?”

He shrugs his shoulder near the bite wound and nods slowly.  “A lot better.”

Shiro’s face lights up as he turns back to his work.  “That’s what I like to hear.”

Keith snorts softly.  “It’s almost like you’re a doctor, not a vampire.”

“Hm.  Is there a rule saying I can’t be both?”

Keith watches him.  The seriousness of him.  Several things click into place.  “...You used to be a doctor?”

“Mmhm,” Shiro hums and Keith thinks he really does look comfortable here, mixing and working with his hands.  It’s kind of sweet.

But the sun is starting to rise and Shiro’s skin looks like it’s growing irritated.  Keith looks up at his pale skin beginning to redden. “...Doesn’t it hurt? The sun is starting to rise.”

“I feel it.  It burns, but if it’s not direct, it should be fine.”

Keith frowns.  “I’ve seen vampires catch fire being touched by the sun.  You really should go back to my room. It’s not worth the risk.  You can do this later.”

“I’ll go back soon,” he hums, grabbing a pestle and grinding more herbs.  “I just want to finish this last thing. It’ll help your recovery.”

Keith sighs as he crosses his arms and scoots in closer.  It’s one thing when they’re stuck in a room together, but here, in the wide open space of this platform, it feels strange walking into a vampire’s personal space like they’re casual friends.

Keith turns hesitant eyes up to him.  Shiro does have a bit of that sharp beauty vampires have, around the edges of his eyes, the sharpness of his jawline, but he’s the softest vampire Keith’s ever seen.  He has half a mind to believe Shiro isn’t vampire at all.

“Thank you,” Keith says softly.  “Thank you for saving me...again.”

“I didn’t do anything.”

“All these potions...I know you’ve been making them for me.  You’re really good at that; they’ve been helping. Even Lance didn’t recover this quickly and he barely had any of the antidote.  And also, Pidge says you went into town and got a messenger... You didn’t have to do that.”

“That’s hardly anything.  But you’re welcome.” Shiro smiles down at him.

“And...thanks for pushing me back when I...”  He clears his throat, feeling a little embarrassed.  “...It’s strong sometimes, being around you. Stronger than the other vampires for some reason.  You must be quite gifted in compulsion. But I was susceptible. ...And you were kind. So thank you.”

Shiro keeps grinding the herbs.  He says evenly, “You don’t feel it now?”

“‘Feel it now’?”  Keith chokes.

Shiro’s eyes go wide with embarrassment.  “N-not like _that_.  I meant...  Like. I don’t know...what it feels like...”  He mumbles lowly, unable to look at Keith.

Keith rubs at his head, turning his face a bit so Shiro can’t see the red on his cheeks.  “I don’t... I don’t think so? It’s so subtle. It doesn’t feel like some sort of outside force, it just feels like...me.  ...I mean...I’ve kept you here from the start,” Keith says softly. “I dunno if that’s me or your abilities speaking...but I kind of think it’s me.  At least part of me.”

Shiro looks down in surprise.

“You had so many reasons to kill me and so many more chances to do it, but you...you helped me instead.  How many times have you saved me now?” Keith laughs lowly. “...I guess it makes sense that you’re a doctor.”

“You don’t have to be a doctor to want to help people.”

“No.  I guess not.”  Keith watches Shiro’s hands work with the plants.  The careful way he touches things, without Keith’s sharpness or tense care.  “You could’ve left,” Keith whispers. “Why didn’t you? I wouldn’t have come after you.”

“I know,” Shiro says.  “You don’t seem like the type who would do that out of spite.”

“How do you know?  I’ve been nothing but angry with you.”

“No, you haven’t.  You’ve been scared and that’s not the same thing.”

Keith stares at him hard.  He doesn’t like being seen through, but...somehow it doesn’t hurt when Shiro’s the one who says it.  “...I don’t get close to a lot of people,” Keith hums, running his fingers through powdered dust on the table.  “I don’t know how to relate. You’d better run while you can. Any contact and I’m immediately desperate over it, I...cling to anyone who comes near...even when they don’t want me.”  He keeps running his fingers over the table, drawing out long meaningless designs. “It’s pathetic.”

Keith sniffs bitterly at himself because that’s probably what this is.  He can’t stand the thought of falling for anyone just because of his own desperate need to fill the hole in his chest.  So he turns, walking carefully back down the stairs. “I’m going to go check in with the others. Be careful out here... The curtains only do so much and your skin’s already red.  ...Maybe I can get better ones if you choose to stay.”

“K-Keith, wait...”

Keith pauses at the end of the stairs.

“I...  I was in here the entire time, hiding in the closet.  I heard everything they said, even when you were out. Of course, I’ve only been here for so long, but they all care about you, if that’s what you mean.  No one thinks you’re clinging to them. They all love you.”

But he saw the knife in Krolia’s hand as she knelt over him.  The fear in his friends’ eyes that he wouldn’t pull through, that Krolia would actually...

Keith takes in a deep breath.  “Don’t let the sun touch you. You can take the bed.”

He opens the door and turns to lock it.  He goes down the steps and out of the lighthouse, looking up at the morning sky.  It’s brilliant. For all the darkness below, in the town, the ocean always manages to bring him peace.  The soft calls of the seagulls in the distance. The way the wind, thick with salt and mist, runs through him.  The sky is so bright and clear on this good day. Refreshing.

It feels like it clears his head and all he can hear is: he doesn’t want to kill anymore.  Shiro, a vampire, can heal others. If he can, then what’s stopping Keith?

But, on the flip side, does that mean he doesn’t want to save innocent lives anymore?  He’ll just...abandon them?

He walks through the old brick pathway and pushes into Kolivan’s old manor.  He expects to smell the warmth of Hunk’s cooking or hear their loud voices piercing through the foyer, but it’s silent.  He goes into the kitchen and no one is there.

He travels upstairs, looks down at Kolivan’s door.  He knocks on Krolia’s instead.

“Krolia,” he calls.  ...She can’t have left him.  Not again. Not without saying anything.  He knocks again. “Krolia, it’s me. Are you there?”

Only silence answers.  With a sigh, he twists the handle and peers inside.  It’s dark. The air is still and stale. ...How long has she been gone for?

He closes the door, staring down into the carpet, feeling dejected.  He was sick. That’s why she couldn’t bring him. He pretends that’s the only reason why.

Keith turns and walks down the hallway, knocking on Kolivan’s door.

“Come in,” Kolivan’s deep voice comes through the door.  He sounds distant, preoccupied.

Keith pushes it open and sees Kolivan sitting at his messy desk, papers everywhere.  There’s a map on the wall that he’s staring up at harshly, glaring into.

He turns for a moment to assess Keith’s state.  “Feeling better? You shouldn’t be out of bed yet.”

“Yeah, I’m fine.  What are you looking at?”  Keith asks.

“Vampires aren’t as obvious as they used to be,” he murmurs, turning back to the map.  “There aren’t as many in other regions, but we get so many reports around here. I was looking at the terrain. Trying to figure it out.”

Keith stares at it for a moment and then looks down at the papers on his desk.  “Where’s Krolia?”

“She went out.”

Keith shifts his weight onto his other foot.  “Where did she go?”

“ _Out_.”

“Right...I got that.  I was wondering where exactly ‘out’ is.”

Kolivan turns from the map and looks to Keith.  “The last two missions you went on were disasters.  You two need a bit of distance.”

“ _Disasters_?  Everyone’s fine, aren’t they?  Lance lived. I lived. I wouldn’t call them ‘disasters’.”

Kolivan sighs heavily.  “Keith, Krolia just wants what’s best for you.  She’s wondering if maybe she made a mistake telling you to lead.  She thinks it’s confused you. We both agreed it’d be best if you take time off to recover not only your physical ailments, but your mental ones as well.”

“...Mental ailments...?”  Keith mutters lowly, crossing his arms tightly over his chest.  He thinks of the others, of how sloppy Lance can still be sometimes.  How Hunk and Pidge don’t even really want to fight. Surely, even in Keith’s weakened state, he could be of _some_ use to them.  “I’m perfectly fine.  I could’ve helped them in some way.”

Kolivan turns his attention back to the map.  “Hm. Don’t be a fool. You can’t go out there like you are, look at your posture.  You should be in bed, resting.”

“I just...  I don’t understand.  She could’ve said _something_.  A simple ‘goodbye’ would’ve done.  It’s not like I would’ve argued.”

“Keith,” Kolivan says wearily.  “What are you saying? You argue everything.  Take a look at yourself right now. Let me help you understand: you both need a break from each other.  It’ll be beneficial for the both of you.”

“I just think -”

“She doesn’t want you on her team right now.”

Keith blinks.  It hits him like a brick to the face.  His position in the Blades, beside Krolia, has been the only thing he’s good for.  It’s all he’s got.

He’s quiet for awhile.  Still. “She said that? She doesn’t...want me on her team...?  But what about when I’m fully healed?”

“It was her decision.  I didn’t try to convince her of anything.”

“But...”  He tries to say, but his world is spinning.  “That - _Why_ ?  The team?   _My team_ ?  She doesn’t even _like_ them!

“It was just _one_ mistake.  Just _one_ !  Out of how many years?  Lance has made like _five hundred_ mistakes.  Just the other day, she was saying how well of a partner I made for her!  She trained me! She can’t just abandon me!”

“Keith,” Kolivan says and he tries to soften his voice, but Keith can hear the tone deep in it.  Like he’s being a child. “You didn’t listen to her. Not just once, not just twice, but so many times and it’s led to critical errors.  You know how off she’s been lately; she needs someone to help her in these times, not make her worry more. And with what happened? To you, of all people.  You’re surprised?”

“Who else could help her better than me?  She _trained_ me to be by her side.  I know her best! Where is she?  I want to talk with her.”

“When you get emotional, you make mistakes.  You think you’re in any state to talk to her right now?  She doesn’t need this added stress. You won’t discuss this when she comes back.  You’re going to wait until you understand _why_ and you are _calm_ about it.”

Keith glares down at him.  “You think I don’t understand?  So that’s it then?” Keith asks, looking up into Kolivan’s shadow.  “One mistake and I’m out? After everything I’ve done for the Blade of Marmora.  I get no say?”

Kolivan’s look cuts through Keith.  “You were unconscious when she brought you in, her protégé, the boy she trained since he was a child - your own blood soaked through her clothes.  You didn’t have to see her reaction. You weren’t there when she had to wash your blood off her skin.  You were in blissfully ignorant unconsciousness as she waited over your lifeless pale body wondering whether or not you’d change.  And this was the happy ending. If Krolia hadn’t gotten to you right when she did, you would’ve had a fate worse than death, Keith.  What do you think would’ve happened to her then?”

“But...that’s how this goes.  That’s what she always said. If one of us turns, we give them a hero’s death.  Even her. That’s what she’s _said_.”

Kolivan is calm.  “You would make her kill you?  You’d make her remember that after she’s already lost so much?”

“...So you’ll just discard me...?”

“You hesitated.”

“I...”

“You were going to let them go.”

Keith breathes out slowly.  “...It’s not... I just...”

“You were sympathizing with the enemy.  Where do you think those two vampires would’ve gone after you’d let them go free?  To the village, where they’d kill innocents. That’s our biggest rule and you know it: give mercy to a vampire and you’re dead.  I hope you learned your lesson, but in case you haven’t, we want to make sure you won’t get yourself killed until you do.”

Keith tries to think of something to say, but he can’t.

Kolivan looks so disappointed.  “We’re not discarding you. But you _need_ time away from this.  Go back home. Get some rest.  Think everything over. We’ll talk again when you’re better.”

Keith rubs a frustrated hand over his face.  “You’ve never thought it? That maybe they’re just as afraid as us?”

He raises an eyebrow at Keith.  “This. Right here. This is just what Krolia and I are worried about with you.  You almost just died because of two of them. That doesn’t show you how ruthless and terrible they can be?”

“And they _did_ die because of _one_ of us.  What if they were just as scared?”

“They’ve killed _hundreds_ of us,” Kolivan hisses.

“And we’ve killed _way more_ of them.”

If Keith expected to convince Kolivan, he was wrong...  Kolivan stares down at him coldly. “Get some rest,” he repeats again, his tone hardening.  “And next time we talk, I’d better not hear any of this. Sympathizing with the _enemy_ .  They killed your _parents_ .  They killed Krolia’s family, Acxa’s family, Allura’s _people_.  People we all loved.  And for what? Until you lose someone you love, you could never understand.  I’m only now seeing just how young you are... I thought you were better than this.”

Keith closes his eyes.  He’s so tired. “If everyone’s already dead, then why are we fighting?”

The look Kolivan holds him with is unfathomable.  It’s like thunder shakes the land. “... _Go_.”

There’s nowhere to go but the lighthouse.  Like usual.

Keith’s chest feels torn open and raw.  If he thought the wounds that the vampires had given him were bad, this feels worse somehow.

Krolia and the others are as close to a family as Keith has and they _left_.  Even Pidge didn’t say goodbye.

He’s so lonely.

He hopes with all his heart that Shiro will be awake when he gets to that musty old attic - there’s something about Shiro that’s so calming and peaceful and Keith doesn’t care if it’s compulsion or not, he’ll take it - but the alchemy table is cleaned and sorted.  The curtain over his room is closed.

Keith kicks his boots off and draws a bath.  He carefully peels the bandages from his skin and looks down at the red sores across his neck.  At the way it bubbled and reacted to the antidote in odd ways. Even Lance’s didn’t look this gruesome.

He lets himself stew in the warm bath water, running a finger over his lip.  He’s not even sure why he’s so mad that Krolia left him. He gets that he’s hurt and wouldn’t be much use in a fight, but it’s more than that: he feels them pulling away.  Leaving him.

Whether it’s meant to be temporary or not, somehow it feels final.

Maybe it’s for the best.  Even if he were fully healed, if he had to go, if he had to fight another vampire, look in their eyes and go to snuff the light from them...could he?

He thinks of Shiro, of his curiosity, of the way his eyes light up as he mixes potions.  ...Is he just the exception? Or is that how they all are? Would Keith be killing others just like Shiro?

Keith climbs out of the bath and dries himself off.  He pulls his clothes onto himself and then goes to his room, carefully pulling back the curtain so no sunlight gets in.

And there Shiro lays, still, trusting Keith won’t do anything to him, like Keith did for him.

So they’re trusting each other now, is that it?  Keith feels a weird flutter in his chest at the thought.  It feels like they’ve taken a step forward somehow.

Keith sits on the side of the bed, placing a hand on Shiro’s shoulder.  “Hey,” he whispers, shaking him gently. “...Shiro.”

Shiro doesn’t even stir.

Keith sighs, bringing his feet up onto the bed.  He stares down at Shiro’s still face. Vulnerable.  Giving himself to Keith completely. Trusting the one who was supposed to kill him.

“I don’t understand any of this,” Keith murmurs to Shiro’s sleeping form softly.  “I don’t understand what I’m doing. And you’re just...caught up in the middle of all of this.  ...I’m sorry,” Keith sighs. “Being with the Blades, it’s...it’s all I have and if I lose it... But still, I just...can’t turn you away...”

He looks down at Shiro’s peaceful face.  His eyelids closed gently, the softness of his lips.  He looks tired, he does, and he probably would feel better if only he’d drink blood.

Keith has blood.  And what else is he good for?

He knows he shouldn’t be doing this, but he feels that pull anyway.  Is it just because Shiro’s a vampire or is it because...?

Shiro’s beautiful, vampire or not.  Keith knows that. There’s something so soft and sweet about his face.  About the way he tries. The way he carefully works to help Keith even though they’re supposed to be enemies.

Can vampires draw their prey in even when they’re asleep?  Keith doesn’t know what the feeling is in his gut, but he allows himself to follow it.  He runs his fingers along the edge of Shiro’s jawline, down his neck, over the pulse point that no longer beats.  His skin is like the smooth ocean stones on the shore. His lips look so soft, so inviting, Keith doesn’t think he can take it, just watching them.

Keith presses his fingers to Shiro’s lips.  Feels the way they give.

“Shiro...?”  Keith asks softly, leaning forward only slightly so sound can travel.  “Shiro... Wake up.”

He doesn’t though.  It’s day and he’s completely out.

And even though Keith doesn’t think vampires can use compulsion in their sleep, Keith still feels drawn in like a bear to honey.

“Shiro,” he breathes again and his voice trembles.  This isn’t right. He wants Shiro to stop him.

He leans in, closing the space between then slowly.  “...Shiro,” he tries one last time.

He can’t take it anymore.  He tilts his head, breathes out one last shaky breath of protest.  They’re almost touching, they’re so close.

Keith pulls away quickly, slapping a hand over his mouth, digging his fingers tightly into his skin so it hurts.  The pain brings Keith back a bit.

Shiro wouldn’t have done this.  He wouldn’t have forced this on Keith.

Keith is horrified.  He’s worse than a vampire.  He lets that sink in. ...He’s _worse_ than a _vampire_.

...Whatever the hell that means.

Keith doesn’t even know anymore.  He doesn’t know anything anymore. He can’t even trust himself; it’s despicable.

He walks onto the other side of the bed, grabs a pillow to jam between them, and crawls up onto it.  He sits on the edge of it for a moment, leaning forward, glaring at his feet.

...Who is he anymore?  They’re enemies. ...They’re enemies.

Shiro sighs in his sleep, turning gently onto his side.

Shiro’s trusting him.  Keith swallows that strange part of himself down and tries to think of tomorrow and what he wants out of life.  What he wants to tell Krolia. Does he want to fight to stay...? Or give in?

 

Keith wakes to a burning in his neck.

He blinks up sharply to worried eyes.

“I’m sorry,” Shiro mutters lowly as he hovers over him.  “I thought maybe if you were asleep it wouldn’t hurt as much.”

Keith groans, pulling himself up.  He sees the black goop on Shiro’s fingers and then touches a hand to his neck.  His fingers coming back the same as Shiro’s.

“I’m sorry,” Shiro says again.  “I should’ve asked.”

Keith waves him away tiredly.  He sees the curtains are open and moonlight pours in.  “God...” He mutters. “I’m starting to sleep on your schedule.”

Shiro chuckles softly.  “If it helps, I’ve been awake for a few hours.”

“Mm.”  Keith blinks around blearily.  “I don’t suppose...anyone came by?”

“Not when I was awake, no.  I made a health drink for you though,” he says, voice brightening.  “I’ve never tried it before. I’m excited to see how it works.”

Keith snorts as he watches the excitement in Shiro’s face.  He looks down at the bottle Shiro’s holding out for him. Well, if he had wanted to poison him he could’ve done it...any other time.  Keith takes it from him and downs it. Chokes and sputters. “ _Ugh_.  It’s awful.”

“Huh.  It smelled okay.  I put roses in it.”

Keith coughs.  “Is that garlic?  That didn’t hurt you?!”

“I was careful with it.”

“Oh, my god,” Keith coughs again, pulling himself up in search for water, but Shiro’s already there, holding a glass out that Keith gratefully takes.  “You’re just about the worst vampire ever.”

Shiro chuckles weakly.  “That might be.”

“Don’t touch garlic or roses,” Keith groans as he takes another huge gulp of water.  “It’s not worth it.” He claps his hand to his chest as it burns down. So much garlic.  He inspects Shiro’s hands, makes sure there aren’t any blisters or boils, but they’re clear of harm.  They’re as beautiful as ever. “Thank you, though,” Keith says as softly as he can around clearing his throat roughly.

“Do you feel any better?”  Shiro asks. “Or did I just make you suffer for nothing?”

Keith shifts a bit, stretching out his sore aching body.  He nods slowly. “...Actually, I sort of do.”

The softest smile warms his face.  “I’m glad. I’m sorry for hogging your bed all day.  You could’ve just pushed me off.”

Again, Keith finds himself smiling.  “I wouldn’t want to do that. I’ve lived so long alone in here...  Sometimes it’s nice to have someone else around.”

“I’ve been wondering about that.”  Shiro asks, “Why do you live alone?  I thought you all lived together in one big headquarters thing.”

“They do.  I just... I dunno.  When I was younger, everyone else had their own place to return to and I wanted that as well.  This was just _here_ , unused except for storage and I liked using it as a base when I was younger.  They always told me how independent I was, so I thought living here alone suited me.  ...And it did. It does. But sometimes, it’s just...” He sighs, getting to his feet and walking out, toward the window.  He pushes the glass away and leans outside, trying to get a glimpse of Kolivan’s place. He can see candle light from Kolivan’s room, but the rest is dark.  He sighs and then turns back to Shiro. “How are you feeling? It’s been so long without food, you have to be suffering. Does it hurt?”

Shiro shakes his head.  “I’m good.”

Keith is quiet.  He knows a lie when he sees one.  He doesn’t know what he can do though.  He can’t force Shiro to drink blood. As he thinks, he rubs at the itchiness of his healing neck and, slowly, an idea comes to mind.  “...I have blood.”

Shiro looks up, freezes, and then quickly looks away.  He swallows hard, already standing to escape.

“Shiro, wait.  I’ve been thinking -”

“-Keith, no.”

“Just a little bit.  You can just take what you need.”

“Keith...   _No_...”  He completely angles himself away.  He turns to go clean up the mess in Keith’s room.

“I _replenish_ my own blood.  It’s not like you’ll hurt me.”

“It will hurt though, I’ll be tearing into your skin.  I’ll be _drinking_ your _life force_.”

“It doesn’t bother me.  I’ve killed so many,” Keith breathes.  “Let me just save one of you. Please.”

Shiro’s already shaking his head.  “...I appreciate it, Keith. Really, I do, but I can’t.  If I drink blood that...it means I’m not human anymore.”

Keith purses his lips as he watches Shiro tense.

Shiro shrugs - a small, dejected movement.  “I don’t want to be this way. It wasn’t my choice.  I...I’d rather die out as who I was, than live as someone I’m not.”

It’s funny almost.  It’s like the opposite of Keith.

Keith sighs and leans out the window, holding his hand out to feel the breeze.  It blows through his hair and fills his lungs. “...Fine. No blood. I’ve got to go out.  I’m going stir crazy. The air feels nice,” Keith mutters. He looks over to Shiro. “Want to go out with me?”

Shiro looks back in surprise.  “You think it’s safe? What if they catch you with a vampire?”

Keith shrugs and turns away.  “Kolivan is preoccupied. He’s holed up in his room trying to figure out why there are so many vampires here, but he won’t.  Besides, I thought you _weren’t_ a vampire if you didn’t drink blood.”

“I don’t think Krolia and your fellow hunters would agree with me.”

“They all left.”

Shiro just stares.  “Oh. ...They left you,” he says softly, like suddenly he understands everything.

Keith nods slowly.  “...Krolia wants me off the team.  I make one mistake - _one_ \- and they’re all so quick to just...”  He clears his throat. “...If it had been anyone else - anyone - it wouldn’t have mattered.  But it wasn’t. It was me. So here I am...”

Shiro nods slowly.  “Let’s go out then,” he murmurs.  He tries to pick his voice up into something like happiness.  “I used to love the ocean, but I was always too afraid to come through the forests to get to this side.  Everyone swore there were ghosts out here.”

Keith laughs.  “Yeah, they said that, didn’t they?  Ugh, the beach on the side of the city is so full of trash all the time.  People suck so much.”

Shiro laughs and nods.  “They’d dump their trash into the ocean like it wouldn’t magically appear on shore the next morning.  It was always super crowded too.”

“Yeah, no kidding.  I couldn’t even take a step onto that beach without being flooded.  God, it was exhausting.”

Shiro laughs again, eyes interested.  Keith unlocks the door and they head out, down the winding steps of the lighthouse to the bottom.

Shiro is bright and inquisitive.  When he can forget about himself and his situation, his eyes will sometimes light up like stars as he takes in all the things that interest him.  And, as it turns out, a lot does.

He seems to love the places inside the lighthouse that he hasn’t seen, head turning this way and that at...well, nothing really.  The lighthouse is the most boring thing ever, Keith thinks. But then Shiro turns his eyes to Keith and his eyes light up even brighter.

“You always handled crowds well when you made appearances,” Shiro says.  “Everyone wanted to be your friend. I’m actually a little surprised to find you so introverted.”

“I wasn’t always.  I used to enjoy it.  And besides, handling crowds is just a skill that can be taught.  It doesn’t mean I have to like it.”

“That’s kind of sad,” Shiro hums.  “...I never knew. We’d always talk about you in class.  My friend did a report on you once - his number one hero.  Everyone wanted to be you.”

“Funny, isn’t it?”  Keith hums as they make their way down a little dirt path that slowly becomes sandy.  As they walk onto the beach, the sand squishes softly beneath their feet. “Even I don’t want to be me.”

“You saved a lot of people...”

“I killed a lot, too.  Vampires, not humans, but...how different are we really?  I’m starting to wonder. You don’t seem different,” he says softly, turning his eyes to Shiro.

Shiro presses his lips together tightly.  “I don’t know the answer.”

“How were you turned?”  Keith asks.

Shiro bites at his lip and shifts uncomfortably.  “Ah... I...I had just come home late from work. I guess I should’ve known because it was dark inside which was...unusual.  ...He had the last of my family. He was just trying to take her and leave. I...I couldn’t just run and leave her. I didn’t know how to fight though.  He knocked us out and when we woke up, we were changed. I never even saw him again.” He’s quiet for a moment. “I can’t help but think if I hadn’t come home late that night, if I hadn’t left her alone, then maybe no one would’ve come to get her.”

“I doubt it, Shiro,” Keith says lowly.  “It could take on the both of you just as easily as it could take one on.  You said you were a doctor?”

“Yeah,” Shiro says.  “I just wanted to help people.”

“God.”  The water splashes up over the shore and only their feet.  “...Fate is cruel sometimes. I’m sorry,” Keith murmurs. “I’m sorry I wasn’t there.”

“How old are you, Keith?”

“Me?  Twenty.”

“Hm.  Young to have the weight of the world on your shoulders.”

Keith laughs softly, turning his eyes up to the ocean’s silver line over the horizon, where it catches the light from the moon.  “Not so much anymore. Try me ten years ago... _that_ was young.  I really did think I could save the world.  I had more energy and zest then though...those were the days.”

“And in ten more years, you’ll look back and think how young twenty is.”

“Pfft,” Keith laughs.  “And how old are _you_?  You’re talking like you’re ancient.”

“I’m twenty- _five_.  It’s not that old, but...trust me on this.  It’s not your fault when someone else dies or is attacked.  It’s not your burden to bear.”

“I’m the only one who can, so it _is_.”

“You saved my sister so many times,” Shiro breathes softly.  “She had the biggest crush on you. She would’ve freaked out if she ever knew I’d be here, sitting next to you, talking casually.  She would’ve wanted your autograph.”

“Oh, god,” Keith snorts.  “Imagine the look that would’ve been on her face when she realized I can’t write.”

“What?”  Shiro blinks.  “Really?”

“No,” Keith laughs at his gullibility.  “All those books in the lighthouse, remember?”

“Oh, yeah,” Shiro chuckles fondly, his eyes warming as he watches Keith’s face in the moonlight, the soft sound of the ocean’s waves gently falling around them.  “...You are so much more human than I thought. She would’ve been thrilled in your presence. ...You gave her many more years of life.”

Keith hears the implication in his tone.  He closes his eyes. “God. I’m sorry -”

“-Keith.  That’s just what I’m saying.  You _saved_ her.  Many times.  We’re all so grateful to you.”

“I wish I could save everyone,” Keith mutters lowly.  “Everyone who wants to be saved, I... I wish I could help them as many times as it takes.  But it’s like the more I fight, the more I hurt and I’m...I’m so tired. I don’t know how much longer I can keep this up, even if Krolia would let me back into the fight.”

Shiro watches Keith.  “I know you’ve done a lot of good.  A lot more in your twenty years than our whole town combined.  You should be proud, not regretful...”

Keith nods slowly, but his throat is tight and sore.  “I... There is one thing I want to do.”

“And what’s that?”

“I want to help you.”

Shiro stops walking and turns to look back at Keith.  His face is so white, he almost looks like the moon himself.  He shakes his head slowly. “All of my family’s dead. I’m okay with this, how it is.  Really. All I wanted in life, since I was young and saw the state of the world, was to help people.  But who would trust me now?” Shiro says softly. “I’ve spent so long afraid of vampires. Now that I’m one of them, I can’t just... _forget_.  I don’t want to be a monster,” Shiro whispers, turning sad eyes to Keith.  “I don’t want to be one of those who tore my family apart. I appreciate your offer and I know it comes from a very good place of your heart, but I cannot accept.  Your blood is your blood. Let’s keep it that way.”

Keith looks down, lump in his throat painful.  He feels the sting of rejection like it’s personal, like his offer wasn’t just to help Shiro, but to help himself too.

“I’m sorry,” Shiro says quietly.  “...I think I understand why you brought me here...  I’m sorry I can’t be that for you.”

“What do you mean?  ...’Be that’ for me?”  Keith’s eyebrows dent in as he slows to a stop.

Shiro keeps walking, head down toward the sand.  “Forget it, Keith.”

Keith’s eyes cut sharply as he chases after Shiro and grabs at his arm.  “ _What_?  What’s that supposed to mean?”

Shiro shakes his head slowly and looks back toward the sea.  “Nothing.”

“You think I’m _lonely_.  You think I brought you here to keep me company or something.”

“I never said that.”

“You kind of just did.”

Shiro turns to Keith patiently, “Well, aren’t you?  Lonely, I mean.”

“ _No_.  I’m fine.  I’m perfectly fine.  I’ve lived like this all my life.  Why would I want it to change?”

The wind picks up, cold and running through their clothes easily.  The ocean’s waves are growing, churning unsteadily. Keith shivers.  Shiro does not.

“I would be lonely,” Shiro says.  “Nothing against your mentor, but I don’t understand why she’s led you through life like this.  She seems to care for you. So why has she isolated you like this?”

“Krolia is the _best_ mentor anyone could ask for,” Keith snarls.

“Yes, she trained you perfectly,” Shiro says.  “But she neglected your heart.”

Keith stares at him for a long quiet moment.  He doesn’t get why Shiro’s saying such things.  To anger him? To upset him on purpose? “How dare you?  You have no right.”

“I know,” Shiro sighs, toeing a little shell on the shore.  “I know... I just feel like no one has told you these things before and someone has to.  Want to know what I would do if I were you?”

“No.”

“I would get out of here.  You don’t owe these people anything, both the Blade of Marmora _and_ the villagers.  They celebrate you, but honestly?  They take you for granted. You’re a boy, not a god.  And if you don’t like it, then what are you doing it for?  You don’t need to wait on them. You’re so worried about the hurt that could fall on them, but you’re here, absorbing the blows instead.  Keith, it’s not right. There’s a small village out east. I hear it’s peaceful. Maybe someplace like that would suit you. You could work on a farm.  You could find a family there.”

“How dare you?”  Keith spits. “You don’t understand.  You don’t understand at all.”

“You’re not happy,” Shiro says.  His face is calm and impassive in Keith’s anger.  He holds his gaze steadily. “It’s tearing you apart here.  How much longer can you last like this, buried beneath this weight tossed on your shoulders?”

“I’m _fine_.”

“And that’s why you’re here, while Krolia and your team are out?  You don’t even know where they are.”

Keith just stares.  He trembles beneath the truth Shiro’s cutting him through with.  It’s all true. Keith hates it.

“Keith, I’m not trying to attack you,” Shiro says gently.  “Obviously, it’s your choice in the end, but from a stranger’s standpoint, I just can’t help but think that you deserve better than this.  You deserve people who will stand by you no matter what you are.”

Keith’s eyes widen.  “Stop,” Keith says again.  “Whatever you’re doing.”

Shiro shakes his head tiredly.  “I’m not doing anything.”

“You’re...you’re _using your words_.  You’re trying to compel me!  You’re trying to convince me of - of -”

“Of what, Keith?  That you deserve to be happy?”

“I -”  His chest is heaving.  He runs his hands through his hair as he takes a step back.  “I’m _not allowed_ to want things.”

“Keith,” Shiro whispers, eyes pained.  “...Of course you are. You’re human.”

“If I wasn’t?  If I was a _vampire_?”

“Even then, Keith...  I still have a heart...you would too.”

“It doesn’t _beat_ ,” Keith mutters, rubbing harshly at his face.  “It’s not the same.”

“I still feel.”

Keith groans.  “You’re the one who said you were a monster.  A monster who didn’t want to _live_ anymore.  You’re starving yourself out until you die just because you can’t stand who you are.  But then you’re telling _me_ to go out and live my dreams?  Are we so different? I don’t want to be this person anymore either.”

Shiro watches him for a long while.  “...Then who do you want to be?”

“I don’t know,” Keith grits through his teeth.  “ _I don’t know_ .  It’s never been my _choice_.”  He takes another step back into the water and turns to the moon hanging above the ocean, frustrated.

The ocean keeps churning steadily - an even flow.  But inside, Keith is choking on muck that’s being uprooted from the confines of his belly.  He didn’t even know it was there. Shiro takes a few steps beside him and looks up to the sky too.  He speaks these truths and brings them to light, truths that Keith always knew existed inside of himself, but never dared to look.

Keith mutters lowly, “I was always meant to be just the perfect little soldier.  And now I’m not even worth that anymore so what’s left?”

Shiro parts his lips as he watches Keith.  “That’s for you to find out now.”

“Right.  Just like you.  One thing changes in your life and you’re ready for the gallows.  I think we’re all just hypocrites here. All just wearing masks.”

Shiro chuckles lowly.  “I think that ‘one little change’ is kind of downplaying the situation, don’t you think?”

Keith fixes him with a scowl.  “Tell you what, I’ll follow my dreams when _you_ follow yours.”

“My dreams?”  Shiro asks wearily.

“You want to help people, right?  Well, me too. Who will go first?”

“I can’t, Keith,” Shiro draws the words out slowly.  “Who would trust me?”

“I would,” Keith says simply, turning his eyes to Shiro with perfectly clear conviction.  “And I’m a scary good judge of character.”

“Oh, yeah?  Says the bite wound on your neck?”

“That’s part of what helped me learn.”

Shiro laughs and looks up into Keith’s eyes, small crooked smile on his lips.  His expression is so warm and fond.

Keith still feels fiery, but Shiro just looks so gentle.  He feels his frown cracking in the face of that and he snorts, crossing his arms testily.  “If you can convince _me_ then I think you’re already doing a good job.  And if you can do it, Shiro, maybe I can do it too...”

“...I think so,” Shiro says.

Keith shifts in the sand, taking in a deep breath, trying to let out tension.  He runs his hand up his neck, rolling out the tight muscles there. The breeze is thick with the sea.  He pushes the mist down his shoulder. “...I want to be someone who helps people too,” Keith decides lowly, watching as the tide sweeps up over the shore and reaches out to them.  “ _All_ people.  That’s who I want to be.”

Shiro smiles at that.  “...Yeah? I could see that.”

“You could...?”  Keith whispers, turning his eyes to Shiro in hope.  “You don’t think I’m just a killer?”

Shiro shakes his head.  “No. I really don’t.”

He looks up to Keith with a soft look in his eyes.  And, suddenly, in a movement Keith doesn’t understand at first, he opens his arms.

“What are you doing?”  Keith asks, blinking down blankly.

“Come here,” Shiro says.

Keith frowns harder.  “ _Why?_ ”

Shiro laughs softly and nods Keith forward.  “When you’re worried about something, you get angry.  A hug might help. Come here.”

Keith gives him an incredulous look.  “That’s for _kids_.”

Shiro takes a quick step forward and Keith, still in shock at being even offered something as juvenile and lame as a hug, is unprepared.  Shiro catches Keith in his arm and pulls him close.

Keith squeaks, shoulders tensing at the touch.  He goes stiff up his spine.

“ _What_ are you _doing_?”

Shiro laughs.  “A hug isn’t just for kids, Keith.  It’s for all ages, trust me. And consider this my first step to helping others, hm?”  He presses his hands to Keith’s back and waits. “Ah, though, I guess it’s probably not so great hugging a vampire.  No heartbeat. No warmth...”

Keith turns his eyes up at Shiro’s, wary and sharp.  “...I don’t get this. I don’t get the point.”

Shiro finds this incredibly amusing.  He smiles at that. “It’s comforting. You know...just knowing someone’s there for you if you need it.  No one’s ever hugged you before?”

“N-not like this,” Keith murmurs.  He doesn’t ease under it. He carefully removes Shiro’s arms and takes a few steps away.  “And definitely not now.”

Shiro tilts his head to the side.  “...Krolia’s never...?”

Keith sighs and rolls his eyes.  “...What’s with you? I’ve told you already.  Krolia is not my mom. She’s always been focused on killing, killing, killing.  Ever since I was a child, she’s drilled it into my head. ...She’s not soft, she’s not motherly.  I mean...sometimes she is, but she... It’s like whenever she catches herself feeling anything for me, she takes ten steps back.  And that’s how it is.”

Shiro’s eyes start turning to that of pity and Keith hates it.  Has to look away from it. “It’s fine. I guess it’s kind of cool to know how to fight and stuff and I wouldn't have ever gotten here without her, so I owe her a lot.  I don’t regret it. Most of the times anyway.”

Shiro hums, looking up to the moon.  

“But...I guess you were right about everything...”  Keith murmurs, looking up toward the sky with him. “You just spewed out all those hard truths at me at once.  ...Who does that?”

Shiro chuckles.  “Sorry, I’ve been locked in someone’s room for the past few weeks.  My socialization skills are a bit rusty.”

“Ah, yeah.  That’d do it.  Me too though. I can’t socialize for shit either.  It’s just me here. Me in this old abandoned lighthouse.”

Shiro looks back toward it, at the top of its old grey structure.  “Does it work?”

Keith turns, following his gaze.  “The light? I think so. I haven’t maintained it since...well, ever.”

Shiro smiles up at it.  “Let’s try it.”

They head back in companionable silence.  Keith has to find the key on the old keyring in order to get to the top floor, sifting through them to try to remember which one it was.

“Not a huge fan of looking out at the ocean?”  Shiro murmurs.

“No.  I never come up here.  Because when I do, I start thinking, and when I start thinking I just...”

“Start wishing for things?”

Keith turns back to him with a hint of mirth in his eye, a crooked smile twisting his face.  “...Your honesty is a little jarring,” Keith says.

“You’re right.  I’m sorry. Tactless.  It’s just not everyday you open up.  I’ve got to take advantage of it.”

Keith snorts.  He finally finds the key and he shoves it into the lock, battling with it until he pulls it roughly open.  The door is crammed between two bookshelves, small and claustrophobic. Keith has to duck to get through. Shiro has to work a miracle to cram through.

It’s dark, so Keith grabs a candle and holds it up above them, shushing spiderwebs out of the way.

“It uses oil,” Keith murmurs as Shiro walks up behind him to investigate.  “These are the reflectors here, see? They look so massive up close... But ugh, watch for the spiders.  There’s one right above your head. No - no, on the other side. Oh -” Keith tsks, reaching up to fling it away.  Shiro ducks down a bit for Keith. “ _There_.”  Keith heaves himself up on the side of the mechanism, peering inside.  “I think the candle goes in right here... God, I don’t remember what half this shit is.  I also don’t have any oil on me.”

Shiro laughs, holding Keith by the arm as he teeters on the edge.  “Me neither, not today anyway.”

Keith smiles over at him.  “Maybe I can get some in town.  It’d be nice to see it lit up again...”  He hums, turning from the lamp and looking out toward the ocean.  The stars are hanging above the waves and the breeze still catches them up here.  Sometimes the ocean storms and throws a fit; they wouldn’t even be able to safely come out here on a night like that.  But today it’s just shifting moodily. And Keith can see it all from here; all of its different moods each day. “I haven’t been up here in years.”

“That’s too bad,” Shiro says, leaning over the bars beside Keith.  “It’s beautiful.”

They stand there together, looking out, quiet.  Keith likes it. He likes the feeling of someone standing beside him.  Of not having to be alone, even if they don’t talk.

Shiro and him resonate together well.  Even in the silence, it doesn’t feel awkward.  They fit.

“...Thanks for taking care of me all this time,” Keith says quietly.  “You didn’t have to. I don’t want you to feel like a prisoner.”

“Not at all.  I’m happy to help,” Shiro says.  “And besides, I owe you one.”

Keith takes in a deep breath.  As long as they’re facing truths tonight...  “You wanted to die that day, didn’t you? The day I was going to kill you.  You were looking out at the sun in such a strange way. I didn’t understand it then, but I think I do now.”

Shiro’s quiet.

“I took your chance away.”

Shiro chuckles softly.  He reaches his hand up and messes up Keith’s hair.   “What’d I tell you about worrying about others?”

Keith pushes his hand off, looking up at him through his mess of bangs.  “I can’t help it. It’s ingrained in me.”

Shiro nudges his arm happily.  “That’s what my family always used to say about me too.  It’s why I wanted to become a doctor. I just find it amusing, that’s all.  They never could understand. ‘It’s dangerous, sticking your neck out for others in this kind of world’, that’s what they always said.”

“Well, look at us.  Look where we are. Maybe they were right.”

“Maybe they are.  But we can’t just stop, can we?”

“No...”  Keith murmurs, feeling so sad and lonely deep in his chest.  “I get it. I get what you wanted that day in the forest...I’ve wanted it too sometimes...but it just seems so sad.”

“And you too.  The way you live.  I wish you would do something for yourself.  Just once.”

Keith heaves a sigh.  “Maybe all the things I want just suck.”

“That can’t be true.  If it’s something your heart wants then it’s a valid thing to acknowledge.  Your wish to help people? That’s a great one, Keith.”

Keith hangs his head over his shoulders and then he turns his neck to the side, to look up at Shiro’s face.  “...What if all the other ones just involve you?”

Shiro is quiet.  The silence is a little shocking.

“...Just kidding,” Keith whispers already turning away.

Shiro shifts to catch him before he goes.  “Keith, I... I’m not sure I can be what you want me to be.  Look at what I am.”

“No, I don’t want you to be anything,” Keith says.  “I just...” Ugh, he made it awkward. He doesn’t even know what to say.  He clasps his hands around his arms and shrugs. The sea doesn’t even interest him.

“I just want to thank you somehow, but I don’t know how,” Keith says, voice softening.  He looks back up to Shiro hesitantly. Feels that familiar pull that warms his core, makes him feel magical and strong.  “You’ve been so kind to me when my first welcoming to you was a knife at your neck.”

“You didn’t know.”

“And you didn’t have to be so kind.”  Keith walks over to Shiro and gently places one hand over his.  “I don’t want you to be anything different than what you are,” Keith murmurs.  “Just yourself.” He stands on the tips of his toes and reaches up, pressing a soft kiss to Shiro’s cheek.  “...Thanks for being you,” he whispers before turning back around and heading downstairs.

He presses a hand to his face, burning in embarrassment.  He doesn’t even shush the spider webs out of his face as he makes his way down the stairs.  He can’t believe he just did that. It has to be the weird vampire vibes. Real Keith has never done that.

Keith changes out of his casual wear and pulls on his day clothes.  The sun hasn’t risen, but the sky is starting to warm. But he stops when Shiro comes in the room.

Shiro has a strange look on his face, halfway between indecision and fear.

He walks up to Keith.  He’s very soft, very hesitant.  He looks like he might say something, but then he reels it back in.  He takes a deep breath, tries again, and then lets out a small nervous laugh.  He forgets it all, grabs Keith by both of his hands and kisses him back on the cheek, only a whisper of a touch.

“I-”  Keith goes to say as Shiro pulls away, but he doesn’t know what.

“Thank you too,” Shiro says lowly, keeping his eyes down and away from Keith’s.  “Even though you were scared, you tossed me on your back and carried me here. You let me into your home and you trusted me. You’ve saved many of my friends and done so much more good than you could ever possibly know.  You are good, Keith. I don’t think you realize that. You should be so proud of yourself.”

Keith closes his eyes.  No one’s told him that before.  Not like this. Not meaning it and feeling it like this.

He believes Shiro.  He feels so much emotion welling up inside of him.  Maybe it’s not real. Maybe it’s just a vampire being a vampire, but he can’t bring himself to care.  He’s never felt his heart unlock and release like this. He feels so free.

He reaches his arms up and wraps them around Shiro.

It’s awkward, at first, but then they both melt into it.  Shiro places his hands gently onto Keith’s sides.

“Thank you, Shiro,” Keith whispers, resting his head on Shiro’s shoulder contentedly.  “Thank you.”

 


	5. Chapter 5

“Keith!”  Someone’s yelling his name.

He inhales sharply, decides it’s too early for this shit, and rolls back onto his other side, cuddling up into his pillow.  It’s so soft and he’s so warm. He could stay here forever.

“ _Keith_.”

He grumbles, irritated.  And then, slowly, something insistent begins to poke at his mind.  He needs to be _awake_ , it tells him, but he tries to convince it that it’s wrong.

The curtain pull back sharply.  Keith darts up in bed.

It’s Lance, outlined in morning light.

“ _Why_ weren’t you answering me?  Where’s the -”

He stops.  Stares at the figure next to Keith.

“ _Lance_ ,” Keith stammers, horrified.  The light will get on Shiro. It’ll burn him.

Keith jumps to his feet and darts across the room, pushing Lance out and quickly yanking the curtain closed.

His hands cling to the curtain as he clenches his eyes shut tightly.

Dammit.   _Dammit_ .  Lance just saw Shiro.  Lance just _saw Shiro_.  It’s all over.

If he tells Kolivan, if he mentions it to Krolia...  Do they leave? Does Keith knock out Lance and take Shiro over his shoulders and run?

Dread in his heart, Keith turns and glances up at Lance’s face.

Lance’s eyes are as wide as saucers.  Keith expects Lance to start gasping in horror.  He expects him to try to run. What he doesn’t expect is for his lips to press together in a wobbling grin and for him to start cracking up.

“Oh my _god_ ,” he laughs loudly, pressing a face to his hand.  Laughter bursts out of him. “Who _is he_ ?”  He says with lavish interest as he arches his eyebrow.  “He was _cute_.”

“Lance, I swear to god -”

“Kolivan and Krolia would _kill_ you if they knew you were smuggling a super spicy _beefcake_ into your room during the day.  I didn’t know that was your type.  And sleeping in until now? Who _are_ you?”

“It’s not like anyone needs me to help out!  I stayed up all last night.”

Lance laughs harder.  “I _bet_ you did.”

“ _Lance_!  No!  Not like that.  It’s not like that.”

But then he realizes what Lance is seeing: both of them in bed together.  Keith had taken his day shirt off somewhere along the lines of falling asleep, and he’s shirtless, just in his underwear.

Shiro said he didn’t mind and they’re both adults.  Why should it matter? He’s more comfortable this way.  He’s always slept without his shirt on.

But maybe it’s for the best Lance believe it.  From the high amused eyebrows and shit-eating grin, it looks like Keith won’t be able to convince him otherwise anyway.

“Who _is he_?”  Lance whispers, excited.  “I’ve never seen you with someone before.  I thought you were like...you know, dead down there or something.  Sacrificed it for super fighting powers.”

Keith shakes his head quickly.  “Uh, he’s...he’s an alchemist. He’s pretty good.”

“Like Allura good or...?”

“Of course he’s not as good as Allura - who is? - but he’s better than Pidge and Hunk.  But he’s not _for sale_ , okay?  He’s just doing it for me as a personal favor.”

Lance holds back more laughter, pressing a hand to his mouth and tittering.  “‘Personal favor’. Oh, my little Keith becomes a man.”

“Lance, shut the fuck up.”

“I still remember you all like, ‘I don’t _need_ anyone.  I’m _above that_.’”

“I never said that.”

He starts laughing again.  “You just do it in secret.”

“Yeah.  Yeah, I do, so please fuck off.  How’d you even get in here anyway?  I locked the door.”

“This place is like a hundred years old.  You can just jiggle the handle and it pops open.”

Keith sighs, looking at the door.  Yeah, it’s that old. More, even.

“I was looking for that one book you always forget to return.  The one with the good knife cleaning recipe.”

“Oh, is that all?”  Keith tsks, walking over to the shelving and skimming through it in search of the book.  “Is Krolia back too? Did she say anything about me?”

“Nothing, man,” Lance says, shrugging.  “But don’t worry about it. You know how focused she gets.  She’ll only be able to handle the rest of us for so long.”

“Yeah, but what’d she say about me?  Is she mad? Upset?”

Lance shrugs easily, poking at some dried herbs Keith has hanging over a bookshelf.  “Can I take this?”

“No.  You can’t.  It’s mine. What did she say?”

Lance takes his hands back to himself.  “She’s acting like you don’t exist. If Hunk or I mention you, she totally ignores us.  Pidge is being careful not to say anything about it though, so they’re kind of on better terms.”

Keith feels his mood dipping further even though he told himself to be strong.

“Sorry, man,” Lance says again, pulling a face.  “She’ll come around.”

“No.  It’s not your fault.  Here’s the book. Just keep it.  I don’t need it anymore.”

“You’re not _out_ ,” Lance assures.  “You’ll be back when your neck gets better.”  He frowns when he sees the scarring that’s old looking already.  “How did you heal that quickly?”

“I use all my potions.”

“Ah...  Maybe I should get on that.”

“Yeah.  Maybe you should.”  It does irritate him that Krolia’s keeping Lance around now over him.  Lance, whom she’s hated since...since _forever_.  Keith basically had to beg her to ever take him on missions before and now she’s preferring him.  It stings.

Lance watches his face, eyebrows high.  “See ya, Keith. Tell your boyfriend I said ‘hi’.”

“Not a chance.  Don’t tell anyone.”

“I won't, I won’t.”

Keith knows Lance will.  Lance has the biggest blabbermouth.  He’ll have to worry about that later though.  For now, he jams a chair beneath the door’s handle and returns to Shiro’s side.

He’s still asleep, dead to the world even through Lance’s chatter.  So completely totally vulnerable.

They kissed.  It wasn’t anything fancy, just a press of the lips against skin, but...  What does it mean for when Shiro wakes up?

Was it just pity?  Does Shiro feel what Keith feels?  Is what Keith feels even legit? Keith realizes there’s something new in his heart...he wants to protect Shiro.

Is that a vampire thing?  Is he being compelled still?

There’s so much he disregarded about vampires back when he just prioritized the kill.  There’s so much more to know about them, about Shiro. He searches through his shelving and grabs a book while Shiro sleeps.  He settles onto the window seat and leans against his pillows, reading through it carefully; discarding it when he’s done with the important bits and grabbing another.  He finds several different professionals all saying the same thing: you are safe from a vampires’ evil persuasion as they sleep.

Keith goes to Shiro, sees the softness of his black hair, the elegance of his face and he...  He still feels it. That warmth in Keith’s gut, the comfort Shiro’s presence brings, even by just _being_ there.  He’s just sleeping, completely still, but it just makes Keith feel better somehow.  He still wants to kiss him. To be with him.

He grabs some of the compulsion antidote and downs a bit.  It does nothing.

His eyes slip back over to Shiro.  Maybe this is the new him.

Keith makes sure the curtain is pulled over the door perfectly so not a peep of sun gets through.  Shiro is tired and dying from starvation, and somehow, he still remains beautiful. Keith goes to sleep watching him.

 

Shiro falls at the alchemy table the next night.  Keith has to slip from his own seat and help him up.

“Sorry,” Shiro breathes.  “...Feeling a little weak.”

“Just drink a little,” Keith murmurs, noting the black circles beneath his eyes.

“No.”

“Maybe it won’t be as bad as you’re thinking.  Maybe it’s no big thing and you’ll feel okay with it.  It’s worth a shot.”

“Maybe for you, but not for me.”

Keith sighs, lifting Shiro up in his arms and helping him back to his place on the window seat.

Shiro shifts uncomfortably but manages a smile up at Keith.  He nods to the door. “What’s with the chair?”

Keith huffs a sigh.  “Lance came in. He _saw you_ .  You didn’t even wake up and he was making such a fuss.  ...It worries me. What if I’m not here? What if I go off and someone comes in?  Not that anyone ever used to, but things are different now. Everyone’s _concerned_ .  I need to fix things,” Keith sighs as he crosses his arms and tosses his head against the wall.  He starts thunking it against the hard wood, grunting with each hit and cringing. He’s just so _ugh_ about all of this.  Lost.

“Don’t do that,” Shiro says.

“Why _not_?”  Keith grudges.  “You can starve yourself to death, but I can’t hit my head a little?”  He does it again, harder, daring Shiro with a look.

“That’s not fair,” Shiro starts.

“You’re telling me,” Keith mutters.  The little shelf above his head creaks in protest.

“You are going to hurt yourself,” Shiro grits out between his teeth and Keith can see his brow furrowing in displeasure.

Keith laughs softly.  “And so?”

“Keith, you are so -”

The shelving interrupts Shiro, slipping from its spot on the wall and toppling onto Keith’s head.  It clunks onto his skull hard and then falls in his lap, cutting at his arm that’s still sore from the vampire bite.

“ _Ow_ ,” Keith grumbles and Shiro tsks.

“I _told you_ ,” Shiro says, scooting forward to grab at Keith’s hands.  He brings them forward, closer to himself. “What hurts? ...Your arm looks like it’ll be alright without stitches.  I’ll go get the bandages in a second. Let me see your head -”

He grabs Keith’s head in both of his hands, tilting it back a bit, his own face close.  And then he stops suddenly, whole body going rigid.

Keith looks up from their hands curiously, eyebrow going up.  “...Shiro...?” He asks.

There’s a trickle of warmth sliding down Keith’s forehead.  He must be bleeding. It doesn’t really hurt; forehead wounds tend to just _bleed_ like drama queens, but the look in Shiro’s eyes says it’s caught his attention.

Shiro leans forward slightly, just slightly.  Keith can see the fervent light flickering in his eyes, boiling away at the usual softness there.  It changes the angles of his face, blots out the softness that makes him Shiro.

He looks like a vampire.

Keith swallows hard, placing a hand on Shiro’s chest and pushing back gently.  “Shiro, stop,” he mutters. “Come on, this isn’t you -”

Shiro brings a hand up to a strip of Keith’s hair that’s covered in blood and he gently runs his hands through a lock of it.  The way his eyes are staring at Keith...black and in a daze. Keith can feel himself wanting to give in to it.

But that’d hurt Shiro.  If this went on. It’d terrify him.

“Shiro,” Keith breathes again, a little desperate.  He feels his eyelids growing heavy, his body going lax.  His hand on Shiro’s chest slips lower, along Shiro’s shirt and down his abdomen.  At Shiro’s touch, Keith tilts his head softly for him. Shiro’s hand traces down his delicate skin.  He lets out a soft breath as Shiro leans in and presses his lips to the soft sensitive curve of his neck and shoulder.

Keith shudders at the feeling.

To be held.  To be wanted.  Keith’s been so deprived of this.  He feels himself opening to the sensation, to Shiro.  His heart flutters in mounting anticipation.

Shiro jerks away suddenly, his hands letting go of Keith.  Keith, having totally given in to him, is imbalanced. He slips and falls off the seat, hitting his head on the ground.

“ _Ow_ ,” he groans again, his limbs sluggish and pliant with the remnants of Shiro’s touch.

“Oh -   _God_.  Keith!”

“I’m okay,” Keith breathes, rubbing at his head again, trying to ignore the ghost of feeling Shiro’s hands against his neck.  “I’m...” The blood has slipped from his face and has changed its course, getting in his eyes. It burns uncomfortably and he rubs at it.

He looks up and watches Shiro, the way he’s staring at Keith in fear, pressing himself back into the corner of the window seat, body tense.  “I’m so sorry,” he breathes out, winded. “I’ve been trying to ignore it, but... I just... I smelled you and I...”

Keith closes his eyes wearily and heaves his tired body up.  “I’ll take care of it. It’s fine.”

“I could’ve killed you,” Shiro whispers in horror.

Keith sighs.  “You didn’t. I’ve had worse,” Keith says, pointing to the gnarled wound on his neck.  “It doesn’t bother me. Try not to think about it. I’m going to go wash the blood away and you won’t have to worry anymore, okay?”

“Keith...”  Shiro says softly.

Keith goes into the bathroom and closes the door.  ...God. He’s burning all over, wanting to be touched.  He was right there, beneath Shiro. The feeling of Shiro over him like this, weight pressed against his body...Keith closes his eyes and presses a hand to the places Shiro had touched.  He runs his fingers over his neck gently, over the soft skin of his lips. He wants to try it. No matter what Shiro thinks might happen. He wants to be Shiro’s prey if that’s what it takes.

Ugh.  He’s got to get ahold of himself.  He’s so fucking horny, it’s embarrassing.  Others give into their primal selves. ...Not Keith.  Not Keith. He bites down on his lip. Can’t deal with it mentally.  He slips a hand into his pants tentatively and leans his head against the door.

He imagines how Shiro might touch him.  Maybe a little hesitant, at first, but he’d grow more confident as he’d watch Keith’s face - see the pleasure and willingness there.  The trust between them. Keith would let Shiro touch him how he pleases. Whether he wants to go slow or fast, but Keith’s burning right now and he can’t wait.  He wants to feel Shiro. He wants it so badly.

He comes with a strangled cry pressed into his arm.  He pants and looks down at himself, at the mess in his pants and on his hand.  At the evidence of his lack of control.

Idiot.  What a stupid idiot.

He steps out of his pants and cleans himself off with them.  He grabs another pair.

He doesn’t even remember why he actually came in here.  He rubs at his face in weary frustration when he feels the dried blood caked there.  So he lights a candle, wrings a towel out in the basin of water and dabs at his forehead with it.  It’s really not that bad, but Shiro’s been starving himself for weeks now and, as a new vampire, that’s when the urge is strongest.  Keith’s honestly surprised it’s taken _this_ much to get a reaction from him.  He’s more surprised Shiro managed to jerk back at the last second.

...He’s disappointed too.  It felt like another step forward they could’ve taken together.  Another part of himself that he never knew was in him, but suddenly makes so much sense as it surfaces.

But Shiro obviously doesn’t want it, so...  Keith sighs to himself again.

“Mmkay,” Keith tries to muster up false cheer as he leaves the bathroom, but it’s like putting tape over a broken faucet.  He sees Shiro still frozen at his spot on the window and sighs. Shiro’s eyes are distant and he’s clearly going through some huge internal crisis.  Keith wishes there were magic words to make him feel better, but nothing he’s said has worked so far. And, he’s pretty sure, nothing will. Shiro’s a _vampire_.  But he’s so afraid of it...of being himself.  And when he tells Keith to be himself without fear...this whole things sits uncomfortably in Keith’s chest.

“Really,” Keith says, approaching him. He doesn’t hesitate, doesn’t slow as he climbs right up onto Shiro’s lap and sits there.

Shiro reers back, horrified.  “ _Keith_.”

“I’m _okay_ ,” Keith says firmly.  “If you had done it, I would’ve been happy.  I’ve _been_ wanting you to do it.”

“Keith, you being this close -”

“Do it,” Keith says, pushing his hair back from his neck and exposing it to Shiro.

“ _Keith_.”

“You're so weak right now.  You’ve got to be in pain. It’ll help you. You can’t just give up and die...  You’re still here.”

“Keith, I should go -  I can’t stay here - I’ll hurt you.”

Keith grits his teeth.  Everyone thinks Keith’s hurt, like some _doll_ .  “Yeah?  You think you can?  You’re so weak you can’t even _stand_ anymore.  Go ahead. Try to leave.”

Shiro stares at him hard.  His hands dig into his clothes as he wrings them in discomfort.

Keith sighs and backs off, sitting at the other end of the window seat again.  He grabs the fallen bookshelf, tosses it away, and then starts tossing the books strewn about away onto the floor.  What’s he doing...? It’s not fair to force Shiro into this. If it were the other way around, how would he feel?

“...I’m sorry,” Keith says lowly.  “I’m... _frustrated_.  I shouldn’t take it out on you.”

Quietly, Shiro asks, “why are you frustrated...?”

Keith doesn’t respond.  Everyone leaves, he shouldn’t be surprised that he can’t manage to keep it from happening now.

“It’s nothing,” Keith says, words light in his mouth. “If you want to go someplace else, you don’t have to stay here.  You’re not a prisoner here...I know you won’t hurt anyone. I’ll help you leave wherever you want to go. I have the time.”

Shiro’s quiet for awhile.  “It’s just that I don’t want to hurt you,” he says gently.

Keith takes in a deep breath and pushes the curtains back, looking out in the starry sky.  The sky is so wide and open, a doorway into the stars above. The ocean allows it to go, sending it off with the softness of clouds.  And Keith is just stuck in place, here, in the dirt.

Keith says, “Watching you suffer like this hurts me.  Watching you give up on yourself, despite who you still are...that hurts me.”  Keith turns back to him. “I know you’re scared...but you’re the sweetest person I think I’ve ever met, human or vampire.  You leaving this world...that’ll hurt. You’re still here now. So am I... Maybe we should both just do the best we can with who we are.”

Shiro considers him, shifting his limbs to get in a more comfortable position.  “...That’s...reasonable.”

“Yeah?”

“Any ideas?”

Keith thinks about.  Their ideal place in this world.  What could they do? He nudges Shiro with his foot as he remembers something.  “Hey. I had a dream this evening. Maybe you and I can start our own team. Teach me how to make potions like you do.  We can go and heal people, help those who need help. ...I’ll defend you if you need it.”

Shiro bites his lip as he thinks.  “Keith, smiter of vampires...a healer.  Any damage we’ve done, we can undo...” His face warms.

“Yeah,” Keith whispers.  “And then I can somehow convince Krolia and the others that maybe not all vampires are evil.  Maybe we don’t have to kill so mindlessly...just following the instructions of others... It’s not right.  It’s never felt right.”

“Who gives you orders?”  Shiro frowns.

“You know Lotor?”

“The prince?  The one who lives in that mansion on the mountains?”

“Yeah.  We used to be a much larger group of vampire hunters consisting of us - the Blade of Marmora, Allura’s people - the Alteans, and Lotor’s people - the Galra.  But it was about twenty years ago, when Allura’s people died, that everyone split into three. Her father died then, he came from the most powerful bloodline; he was in charge.  Allura was supposed to be after him and she tried, for awhile. She held us together like glue, but...we left for awhile, and when we were gone, things worsened here. When we got back, she was gone, ran into the woods.  Made a home there. It’s just her and her uncle. They’ve abandoned this fight and live alone in the woods. I can’t blame her. ...She’s the only one who can make the antidote though...which we must be low on by now,” he hums, thinking of all they must’ve used on him, not to mention what they had just used on Lance.  They’ve been sloppy lately. “Anyway, Krolia’s of royal blood too, and Lotor. Really, it should be Krolia who’s in charge right now. But she was hurt when she was younger and couldn’t fulfill her destiny, and then she did some shady shit running from the Blades to try to save her son. He died, so she’s back. People still respect her, but...unfortunately, her running away has sort of left Lotor at the head of the food chain here.  Kolivan is strict to the _code_ and Krolia has no reason to argue.  So they all trust Lotor by default.”

“You don’t?”

“Well...he hasn’t exactly _lied_ to us before, but...sometimes he’ll severely ‘miscalculate’.  When we went to the place where I found you, for example, he said there’d only be a handful.  And it turned out to be so much more. And it’s strange to me...strange that there are so many vampires in this one area.  It was never like this when we lived North for awhile. It was never like this _before_.

“I just wish Allura would come back...  She’s the only one everyone would listen to without starting some sort of war.  The Blades and the Galra _do not_ naturally get along.  What a nightmare it’d be if they ever went against each other.  While the Blades are more skillful, the Galra have more numbers.  ...Honestly, I don’t think we’d win against them. And maybe that’s what he’s trying to do now, by sending us out on missions we’re not prepared for - kill us all off quietly.  I don’t know. Krolia seems to think we’re impervious. Though...maybe not so much anymore. Maybe that’s why what happened to me shook her so much.” He sighs.

“I didn’t realize vampire congregated in groups like that...”

“What do you mean?”  Keith frowns. “ _You_ were part of that group.”

“Well, I...  It wasn’t by choice.  They just locked us in a room,” Shiro mutters.  “They explained nothing. They dragged all of us, confused and terrified into a room that didn’t fit all of us.  Just bodies on top of bodies... It was...” He lets out a shuddering breath. “It was the worst thing I’ve ever experienced.  And I didn’t even realize then, until they let us out like cattle, what we actually were. And suddenly, everything just clicked.

“But really, I was grateful for you guys, even then.  Even though I knew you were coming to kill us. I was...terrified...” Shiro says quietly as he remembers.  “But...grateful.” He presses the tips of his fingers to the cut above his nose. “It was Krolia who got me across the face.  It was shallow, but I could feel the poison coursing through my veins. I watched as the sun began to rise...and then I saw you.”

Keith lets Shiro scoot him to the side, sitting right beside him.  He holds Keith’s hands tightly as he leans into his space. “Keith, you’re not a monster.  I saw you and everything bad just melted away. You’re so beautiful,” he says, closing his eyes and leaning his head back as he remembers.  “The sun lit you up in gold as you stood above me. I was...so much more than okay with letting that be my last moment.”

Keith snorts without feeling.  “...You were delirious on Krolia’s poison.”

“Am I still poisoned, you think?”  Shiro says.

Keith whips his head over, eyes wide.  As the shock slowly fades from him, he starts laughing.  “...Are you for real?”

Shiro shrugs, laughing with Keith.  “You’ve always looked like an angel to me.  Ever since we were small and I’d see you from the tops of my friends’ shoulders as we balanced precariously, seeking you out in the crowd.  ...And as I’ve come to know you better, I just... I think I’ve been right all along.”

“I kill people,” Keith says wearily, wiping a hand over his face.

Shiro grabs Keith’s hands and holds it steady.  “But you _saved_ me.”

Keith turns a frown up to him.  He mutters lowly. “Then why are you dying?”

Shiro sighs.  He whispers, reaching up to place gentle fingers at the crook of Keith’s neck.  He stares hard at the pulse point there. “The thought of taking life from someone else...”

“You think we don’t as humans?  What about the food we put on our plates?  Allura says plants have feelings too. And she’s an honest-to-god witch; she would know.  Everything around us has life... We have to take it in order to live. And maybe that’s a sacrifice we must take.”

They watch each other quietly.  “...Besides,” Keith whispers. “It’s not like you’ll kill me.  Just take a bit at a time and it’ll be fine.”

“Easier said than done,” Shiro whispers.  “When I smelled it just a second ago, I lost control.  What if I bite into your neck and can’t stop? The thought is horrifying.”

“Maybe if I put it in a cup?  I can cut and then -”

“No, don’t,” Shiro mutters as Keith gets his knife out.  “Just... Just give me a bit.” He settles back down, his eyes still following Keith fondly.  “...And you think you could be called a monster...?” He chuckles softly.

“You keep forgetting,” Keith says, holding the knife up.

“No,” Shiro whispers.  “I’m remembering a little boy who’s given up so much of his life in order to keep others happy and safe...  The weight of the world on your shoulders willingly...a monster?” Shiro shakes his head slowly, warmth in his eyes as he watches Keith face.  “You’re anything but.”

Keith feels a smile grow on his face and he can’t help but relax beneath Shiro’s touch.  “Thanks, Shiro,” he murmurs and then starts as Shiro leans in, pressing his lips carefully to Keith’s.  Their lips mesh together perfectly, pliant and softness pressed together in harmony.

“I’ll think about it,” Shiro says gently, looking up into Keith’s eyes.  He brushes a strand of Keith’s hair back and leaves his fingers resting there against the side of Keith’s face.  “Maybe you’ve changed my mind.”

 

Keith barely sleeps that morning as Shiro settles and conks out.  He’s trying his hardest not to get his hopes up, but he thinks he can still feel a trace of the sensation of Shiro’s lips pressing to his and he doesn’t want to let that be faded by a night of sleep.  So he lays there on his back, looking up at the ceiling, at the way the dried vines twist in what looks like a dance. They’re happy almost. Cute in a way.

He really likes Shiro.  Lance was right. Life was busy.  There was really no time to slow down, to give any sort of thought to the people in town waving their hands at him, trying to get his attention.  They didn’t see him for who he was. He despised them, in a way. Maybe now, he’s sort of starting to understand why.

Shiro sees him.  More than Keith wants to see himself.  It feels so healing.

He has a hard time shoving down the hope he feels when Shiro tells him that he’s reconsidering.  If Keith can just get him to feed, get him to heal...everything would change...

Maybe they really could be a team together.  Maybe they can change Krolia’s mind. Maybe -

There’s a knock on the door and a grumble as someone tries the door and finds it stuck on the chair.  He takes one last look at Shiro, touches a gentle hand to Shiro’s wrist in soft parting, and then runs to the door.

“Hey,” he breathes when he swings it open and sees Pidge there.  “I’ve been wondering when you’ll come by.”

“Heeey...  Are you mad?”  She cringes as she looks up at him guiltily.

He shakes his head.  “It’s not your fault.  Did Krolia say anything?”

“Uh, well, we’re sort of leaving again tonight...”

He nods slowly.  He swallows hard and pushes his emotions away.

“And we’re running really low on antidote, so Kolivan wanted to have you go to Allura’s...”

“Oh,” he says shortly, his stomach dropping.  He should’ve guessed. They just needed something from him.  That’s why she’s visiting. Their tool to the end.

Maybe Shiro was right.  Maybe Keith should go on his own journey.  Find his own happiness. He sighs. “Of course,” he says.  “Allura’s.”

“But are you alright to?  You’re not too weak, are you?  I could try to do it really quickly now, before we leave.  I told them I would, but I think Kolivan wanted someone to check to see if you were alive up here.”

“...He can’t do it himself?”  Keith grunts bitterly, kicking at the panel of wood that’s warped on the edge of the doorway.  “Lance was just here this morning.”

“Ah, Lance went back to his house after last night and he’s late right now.  ...Also, Kolivan and Krolia know you’re mad. They’re giving you time, I think.”

“Right.  I’ll go right now.  Anything else?”

“One last thing - Lotor came by.  I thought I’d tell you in case he decides to come harass you too.  Just ignore the door maybe.”

“Yeah, if he doesn’t have his goons bust it open.  What’s he doing all the way over here?”

“He heard you got hurt.  He’s saying we need to take ‘more desperate measures’ to protect everyone.  You know. Same old Lotor.”

“‘More desperate measures’,” Keith grumbles moodily.  “Like a knife to the heart isn’t final enough. What’s Krolia supposed to do about it?”

Pidge shrugs, unworried.  She rolls her eyes and says in a mock dramatic voice, “The _blood moon_ approaches.  Like that’ll somehow clean Krolia’s blood of taint or something.”

“Oh, god.  He’s going on about that again?”

“Yeah, probably why he left angry.  Hey, when you go to Allura’s can you ask her for these too?”  She holds out a long list of potions.

He sighs as he takes it from her and shoves it in his pocket.  “...Okay. Like Allura will actually do all these...”

“She’s always more lenient for you.”

He shakes his head.  “Where are you going?”

She pulls a face.  “I wish I could tell you, I do.  But Krolia says -”

“-I’d sneak around and follow behind because I can’t listen to orders...”

She shifts awkwardly.  “Uh... We’ll be back in a few days.  Kolivan and his crew are still working locally.  They’ll be there if you need them.”

“And Lotor too, of course.  I can’t believe she’s still leaving me behind.  I’m basically healed.”

“Yeah?  You’re a magic healing boy?” she says, reaching up and pulling his collar down so she can see.  “Wow. It actually does look a lot better. Doesn’t hurt?”

“No, not at all anymore.  I wish she’d just talk to me.”

“I’ll pass along the message.  I’ll talk to her; I’ve just been waiting for the right time.  I -” She stops, pulling him down closer with one sharp tug.

He stumbles forward.

She runs her hand along his neck.  “...What is...this...?”

“What is what?”

“...A bruise...?”

His stomach drops.  “Uh...my bookshelf fell on me last night.”

“No...”  She murmurs, standing on her tip toes, looking closer.  “...This looks almost like...” Her eyes flick up to his.

He doesn’t know what she sees there.  He stares back as calmly as he can.

“Your bookshelf?”  She whispers.

He nods slowly.  “...Old walls.”

She stares hard into his eyes for a moment more.  Slowly, she says, “...We need to fix that,” but her voice is distant.

She lets him go and he pulls himself back up, fixing his shirt.  She’s frowning straight at him.

He licks his lips.  “...When are you leaving?”

“...Um...”  She runs a hand through her hair and shifts her glasses on her face.  “We’re leaving right now... Everything’s packed and ready to go.”

“Great.  Well, we’re in different directions, so...see you soon, Pidge.”

“...Keith, wait.  I... I really am sorry for how things have been lately.  If you want to talk to me when I get back, you know I’m here for you.  Krolia’s not trying to ostracize you. She’s just scared. Seeing you hurt like that...I don’t think she expected to ever have to see that.  I know she cares about you. It’s like she’s running away.”

He nods slowly.  “I know.”

“Oh, um.  One last thing.  Krolia told me to tell you that she didn’t tell me to tell you to take your medication.”

Keith huffs out a half-laugh.  “She didn’t, did she?”

“Nope.  So do it, got it?  We’ll be back soon,” she says, turning and walking down the steps.  She turns again when she reaches the base of the steps. She waves. “Don’t be a stranger.  You know Mom and Dad would be ecstatic to see you around for dinner even if I’m gone. You haven’t visited all year.  They miss you. Matt keeps asking if you’ve gotten too famous for us.”

Keith snorts.  “Yeah. Yeah, I know.  I should. I’ve just been...distracted.  I will, Pidge. Thanks.”

“‘Kay...”  She stands there for a moment, staring out into the ocean’s edge, troubled.  She sighs eventually. “See you, Keith.”

He gives her one last weary wave, watching her disappear down the hill.

He turns back to the attic and sighs.

Allura.

Allura likes her privacy.  She likes to set up her lonely cabin deep in the woods, far away from everyone else, alone.  She’s been torn up about it, done with everyone, forsaking them all. Them included.

She and Keith used to get along really well before the Blades left - she’s fond of him for some reason, like he’s her little brother, but she’s gotten quieter since.  The more she isolates herself, the harder it is for the Blades to reach her, both physically and through conversation.

Usually, they send Keith though.  He’s their best bet when it comes to Allura.

“Shiro,” Keith whispers softly above him.  He sits on the side of the bed and shakes Shiro by the shoulder gently.  Shiro wobbles back and forth, but he doesn’t wake in the slightest.

“I’m going out for a bit,” Keith sighs.  “...Will you be okay by yourself...?”

Shiro is so still.  Keith bites his lip.  He says loudly so that his voice booms, “ _Shiro_!”

Nothing.

Keith slowly gets ready.  He’s dragging his feet about it.  For one, he doesn’t exactly feel like he’s completely recovered; he’s tired.  But two, he’s afraid to leave this place. He thinks it as he jams his supplies into his bag.

...His stomach hurts at the thought of just leaving Shiro here _completely_ defenseless.  He can see it in his mind’s eye because _he’s_ killed vampires in their sleep before.  They don’t even wake up. Shiro wouldn’t even know.

Maybe it’d be the most merciful end for a vampire, but Keith can’t take that thought.  What if they found out Keith’s betrayal and locked him away, never telling him what happened with Shiro?  What if he never knew of Shiro’s fate?

He looks back toward the door, where Krolia is a few feet away...for now.  He wishes -

It doesn’t matter.

You know what?  None of it matters.  What else could they take away from him if he decides to not even go?  He’ll just go later with Shiro. It’ll be good for him to get out, experience the fresh ocean air.  It’ll be fine.

He’s tired anyway.  He lays back out next to Shiro and watches his quiet still face.  Keith wishes he could reach up to kiss him again.

He sighs again and rolls onto his back, pressing his fingers to his lips, feeling the softness there.

It was just a kiss.  He’s an adult, it shouldn’t be like this.

During the day, he falls asleep and he dreams of Shiro.  He dreams of kissing him. He’s never had a dream like that before.

 

Keith holds a branch back for Shiro who steps carefully over a log.  He almost trips, but he re-adjusts himself so he manages to stay balances.

“...The offer still stands,” Keith says.

Shiro clears his throat and laughs on a breath.  “Yeah? What would Krolia do if she saw me using you for food?”

“Kill you,” Keith says simply, looking up toward the moon to gauge its distance.  If they take too long, it’ll be dangerous for Shiro. Morning cannot rise when they’re out.  ...But he’s slower than Keith thought he’d be.

“If she knew you were the one who suggested it?”

“Kill you still.  She’d assume I was under your spell.”

“Right...  So say...say you told her beforehand that you’d let me.  I’m just curious.”

Keith lets out a small amused chuckle.  “...If you knew her like I knew her, you’d know that, no matter what, she always kills the vampire.  Even if it were Lance, she told me to do it. Even if it were Pidge, or Kolivan, or herself. ...Even if it were me.  When she thought I’d turn, she had that knife in her hands like she’d use it... Duty first.”

Shiro’s quiet for awhile.  “But she loves you.”

“No.  Actually it’s like this: her long lost family first, duty second, her knife third, and then me...?  Somewhere way way down below.”

“I don’t believe that.”

“You don’t have to.  You don’t know her like I do.  Nothing matters more to her than her family.  Kolivan told me that she quit this life. Her - Krolia - quitting _this_ , something she’s _so good_ at, so that she could live a peaceful life with her family.  And when they died, she... Well, that was it.”

“That’s horrible...”

“Yeah, well, we could’ve been a family too,” Keith whispers quietly.

Shiro looks over, eyes sad and sympathetic.

“But I mean...isn’t this everyone’s story?  Allura too, she’s...she’s sensitive about things.  When we go there, I’d keep my distance. She hates vampires maybe as much as Krolia.  If she realizes what you are...”

“She won’t be able to tell what I am from looking?”  He can’t see himself in reflections, which is a shame, Keith thinks.

“For a vampire, you’re...softer somehow.  I went back and forth myself at first. Lance couldn’t tell.  And then, I think people will automatically assume you to _not_ be a vampire if you’re by my side.  But just stay back. It’ll be fine.”

There’s a river running through the forest and a small wooden bridge giving access across.  It’s taken a few hours, but they’re close. Keith can hear the frogs ribbiting happily beneath the bridge and see the fireflies floating lazily out in the distance, flickering like stars.

Shiro slows as he takes in the sight, his hand stilling on the gate’s railing.

“...Everyone used to think there were ghosts out here,” Shiro murmurs, his eyes reflecting the fireflies’ light.  “So we’d avoid this place. What fools we were...this place is like a fairytale.”

“Funny what people make up without actually knowing.  No, out here it’s just Allura and her crazy uncle, with frogs and fireflies to keep them company.  And they wouldn’t hurt anyone. It is beautiful,” Keith agrees softly, holding his hand out to try to catch one.  “Untouched by people. ...Sometimes, I think we’re the bad ones.”

Shiro watches him through his gentle eyes.  The water flowing gently beneath the bridge catches Keith’s reflection, but Shiro’s missing.  Keith smiles crookedly at Shiro and pushes off the railing, heading back down the path.

Her cottage is in the middle of the woods, at the end of a small wispy path.  Most of her home is covered in plant-life, like her home is part of this place. There are bird nests weaved through the plants, so Allura is always hounding on them to open and close the doors _gently_ , something Lance can never seem to manage.  He’s not often invited back.

“Cute,” Shiro says.  There are farm animals out in the back, but they’re all asleep now, put away.  The gardens and their flowers are closed up, but candlelight inside can be seen from where they stand.

Keith knocks gently on the door.

It’s Coran who answers, blinking groggily, his mustache a mess and a cap on his head.  “Why, if isn’t Keith!” He says. “What are you doing out here at this hour?”

“I’m sorry to come so late,” Keith says, looking over Coran’s shoulder into the cottage.  “I meant to come earlier, but I haven’t been feeling well and this is the first chance I’ve gotten.  Is Allura here?”

“Mm,” Coran says hesitantly, peering back into the house.  “Need some potions, I assume?”

“It’d really help us out.”

Coran hums uncertainly.  He’s about to open his mouth, Keith can see the rejection already there.

Keith throws his hand out at the door, pressing it back.  “Let me speak with her.”

“O-oh, but the princess shouldn’t be disturbed at night.”

“She’ll be fine if it’s me,” Keith says, stepping in.  “This is my friend, Shiro. He’s an alchemist too.”

Coran sighs and holds his hand out to shake Shiro’s hand.  Shiro blinks down at it cautiously. Everything about him is cautious here, like he’s not sure if this is all a trap about to spring on himt.

“Allura,” Keith calls through the house.  “Allura, are you busy?”

Her head pops around the hallway.  “ _Keith_ ,” she says happily, walking out of her room, her hands coated with green stains.  Her hair’s a bird’s nest, long and frizzy and there are leaves sticking out of it, but she seems happy - a little spark in her eye, and Keith lets out a small sigh of relief.   She brushes her hair back, trying to smooth it. “ _Oh_ , it’s been too long.  I thought you’d never come back to visit me.”

“You live so damn far out,” Keith grumbles, fixing his light armor covering his stomach as she carefully tosses her arms around his shoulders for a hug.  She has so many layers of clothes on, Keith has to tilt his chin up to breathe. “I wish I could see you more. If only you’d live closer...”

She smiles patiently at him as she takes a step back and looks to the bag on his shoulder.  “Potions?”

“Antidote.”

He brow pulls in tightly.  “...Antidote? Who needed it?”

“Uh.  Well, Lance for one.”

She grabs the empty bottle from him and blinks into it.  “...There was enough to last _years_ of Lance’s antics.”

“Yeah?  Well, I sort of...also...got bitten...”

She turns from her work bench and looks at Keith.  “...Did you really?” She whispers, face grave. “...How badly?  How much did you need?”

“A lot apparently.  Several different times.  I’m okay now. They had to give me quite a bit before it worked.”

“The antidote will kill you before the venom at this amount,” she mutters as she sets the glass vial down.  For the first time that night, her eyes fall on the wound on his neck. There’s something dark in her eyes. “...Did it hurt?”

“It doesn’t anymore.”

She reaches out to tilt his neck.  Her hands are always freezing out in the middle of the forest, probably never actually leaving her house.  Keith sniffs and lets her. Her frown just keeps deepening. “...How long ago did you get hurt?”

“Two weeks about.”

“...How did it heal this quickly?”

“Shiro did it.  Shiro’s an alchemist too.  In fact, I haven’t introduced him.  Allura, this is Shiro. Shiro, Allura.”

She looks up at him, eyes wary.  She gives him a once over, her hands going still on her work.  “...An alchemist,” she says lowly.

Shiro bites his lip but offers his hand.  “Nice to meet you.”

She glares down at it, turning her eyes back to Keith’s.  “...He’s new? Can I speak with you in private?”

“He’s saved my life more than once,” Keith says.  “I trust him.”

She turns suspicious eyes back to Shiro.  “...You do...?”

“Yes.”

“You’re not one to trust,” she murmurs again, still looking.  Grudgingly, she tears her sight from Shiro and back to the antidote.  “Keith, you have to be careful.”

“Trust me when I say that Krolia has it all under control.  She won’t let me go with them right now. She won’t talk to me either.  They’re saying she wants me off her team.”

“Oh, that’s just silly,” she says flippantly, in that way she always does, like she knows all.  “I was wondering why you had that mopey face on, coming to visit me here, in these far away woods in the dead of night.  You always get mopey the second she doesn’t approve of anything you do.”

He tsks.

“Here,” she says, gesturing them to follow her down the hallway and out the backdoor.  Some of the flowers are closed in the moonlight, but there are rows and rows of plants growing under her care.  Flowers, herbs, apparent weeds - everything. She grabs a basket from the side of her house and hands it over to Keith, then leads him around the garden using the light of a firefly in a jar.  She clips several herbs along the way, gesturing Keith forward so she can place them in the basket. Shiro follows behind with his hands in his pockets.

Keith watches Shiro.  Though he’s out of place, he handles it well.  It’s good for him going out like this. The soft expression he wears on his face as he looks down on the garden is peaceful and content.  He’s not thinking of vampire or human. He’s living in the moment. Keith didn't know a vampire could just... _live_.  Shiro is so beautiful like this.

Allura speaks and Keith turns his attention back to her.  “Remember that time when you were around...hm, when was it?  Seven? Eight? And you decided upon yourself that you wanted one of Krolia’s knives, so you snuck into her armory, chose one for yourself, and just started using it?”  Allura chuckles fondly. “You _might’ve_ gotten away with it, but then you went and took her favorite one.”

Keith flares red with embarrassment.  He wishes Shiro didn’t have to hear this.  “I was six and I ended up cutting myself pretty badly.  Krolia was livid.”

“Yes, you did.”  She smiles up at him, brushing her hair behind her ear.  “She took the knife back for awhile...but, correct me if I’m wrong, is that not the same knife you wear on your belt now?”

Keith presses a smile down, looking at the basket full of flowers.  “...She gave it to me on my sixteenth birthday.”

“Hm.  Her favorite knife.  And you think she doesn’t care for you?”

“I’m better with it.”

Allura laughs and stands, dusting her apron off.  “...My point is: Krolia’s afraid of being a parent, but it doesn’t mean she doesn’t care for you.  She hides from you...but she’ll come around.”

“Don’t say ‘parent’,” Keith grunts, turning around to follow Allura back in the house.  “You didn’t see her. When I almost turned, she was going to kill me.”

“No, she wasn’t,” Allura says simply, taking the herbs from the basket and mashing them together.

“She _was_.”

“No.”

“I could’ve been a _vampire,_ ” Keith says.  He doesn’t think she’s getting it.  “You _know_ how she hates them.”

“I know how she loves you,” she hums.

“God,” Keith grunts, wearily tossing himself into a seat nearby.  “How would you know? You’re here now.” He can’t keep the bitterness out of his voice.  She abandoned them. He gets her reasons and he can’t blame her for that, but it still hurts sometimes.

She’s quiet.  “Shiro,” she says eventually, nodding him forward.  “Can you get me frog leg from the other room? It looks like this,” she turns the book to show him.  “It should be in the cupboard to the right. Behind the dried slugs.”

Keith can see Shiro’s face cringe in disgust he tries to disguise for the sake of being polite, but he nods and wanders out.

Keith turns his attention back to Allura, who turns and leans against the table.  “I’m glad you came to visit me this time,” she says. “Because things feel different for you.”

“Are you talking about the stars lining up in a certain way again?  You know I don’t believe in that.”

“It’s a feeling, Keith.  They’re never wrong.”

He blows out a breathful of air.  “Right.”

“Well,” she says.  “You may think it’s silly, but it brings me great joy, so let me go on for a bit.  I feel like you’ve just met a crossroads in your life. You made a decision, and you just chose something that’ll change your life.”

“Vague and unhelpful.  And plus, you see Shiro right here.  You know I’ve met someone new.”

She gives him a wry look.  “...I see the way you look at him.”

“ _Don’t_.”

“I told you that you’d meet someone new when I did that tarot reading for you the other month, _didn’t I_?”

“I don’t believe in your cards.”

“The funny thing about them is you don’t have to believe in the cards for them to be right.”

He tosses her an amused look and she smiles back.  “...I’m happy for you, Keith. I feel like you’re growing up, branching out, discovering life.”

Keith’s quiet.  “I... It’s not true,” he says lowly.  “I’ve been...under the weather or something.  I haven’t been able to concentrate on our missions.  There’s been so many more vampires lately, and _I know_ I need to focus, but even still...  I get others hurt because of it. I hurt myself.  My head’s been...a _mess_.  I’m all over the place.  I don’t know what I’m doing.  I used to know. I don’t anymore.”

She’s smiling warmly at him.  “Sounds like you’re growing.”

He shakes his head tiredly.  “God, no. More like withering.”

“You’ll weather this storm, Keith,” she says, turning back to her work.  “You always do.”

“God, I miss you,” Keith whispers.  He’s quiet for a long while, watching the dance of mixing and calculating she does as she makes her potion.  “Allura...I... I’ve felt weird lately, unrelated to my own shit. It’s like... It’s like Lotor’s closing in on us or something and no one else can feel it but me.  More and more vampires keep popping up around here and he keeps sending us to them. ...I’m afraid for Krolia and the others. What if Lotor tries something? Allura, come back.  Please. We need you. Allura, Lotor listens to you. Kolivan listens to you. Things were better back then. There wasn’t this tension. I...I’m worried for Krolia. I’m worried for all of us.  ...We miss you.”

She doesn’t respond, but Keith can see in the candlelight as she swallows hard.  “Keith, I can’t. You know I can’t.”

“Something’s not right about Lotor.  How can we follow someone like him? He’s a snake.”

“You _know_ why I can’t go back.  You all need a better leader than I can be and Lotor _is_ the better choice.  I miss all of you too, but...I can’t be what my father wanted.  I’m sorry. My place is here, in the quiet, in this cottage. I like it here.  It’s better for everyone.”

“You _would be_ the better leader.  That’s what I’m trying to say.  Lotor has no mercy for vampires -”

Allura blinks, turning to him sharply.  “Mercy? For vampires?”

“...I...  I just mean...”  He clears his throat.  “I don’t know. It’s almost like he likes it.  Killing. And that doesn’t feel right.”

Allura sighs.  “...Lotor’s come by recently too,” she says.  “...He was asking about Krolia.”

“What about her?”

“If her blood could still be used for the sacrifice.”

“ _What_ did you _say_?”  Keith leans forward, hands clenched to the end of the table.

“The truth: it can’t.  Not as it is. He wasn’t happy to hear it; you know how focused he is on wiping out all the vampires, he’ll use anyone.  But you’re right. It’s almost as if he enjoys it. He didn’t always used to be like this, you know,” she says lowly, her voice going quiet.  “He used to be sweet... He used to be kind...”

“...Allura,” Keith says softly.  He knew what they used to mean to each other.  Lotor and her had a _thing_ years before and she’s a soft spot on his otherwise cold heart.  Keith suspects if Allura had died along with the rest of her faction, then Lotor wouldn’t be friendly at all.  “Maybe to you...”

She’s quiet for awhile.  When she speaks again, her voice is soft.  “He asked for me to come back home.”

“And what’d you say?”

She sighs wearily, closing her eyes as it all overwhelms her.  “Keith, you know what I said. _This_ is my home now.  No matter how many times any of you ask.  I love you all, miss you all, but I’m not the right fit.  My father always said to ‘know your limits’. I’ve met mine.  I’m not strong enough to help you. I can’t command any of you.  That’s not me.”

“Didn’t he used to say, ‘know your limits so you can _surpass_ what you once thought they were’?”

She blinks up in surprise.

“Krolia told me.  She was fond of him.”

She lets out a small low laugh.  “...Aren’t you plucky today? Is it because of your new boyfriend?”

“He is _not_ my boyfriend.  What kind of mission did you send him on, by the way?  He’s been gone forever.”

She laughs as Shiro rounds the corner, looking confused, hands empty.  “I couldn’t find it,” Shiro says.

“Oh, right,” Allura hums innocently, opening a drawer and peering inside.  She pulls out a small mesh bag. “Here it is. I must’ve forgotten.”

Shiro smiles crookedly at Keith and Keith smiles back.

She dumps everything into the glass vial, shakes it up and then nods Keith over.  “Here,” she hums, handing the antidote over again. “Hopefully you won’t need it. Keith, whatever’s going on with you, I know you’ll figure it out.”

“Is that the good vibes talking?”

“‘Vibes’,” she laughs under her breath, placing a hand on his shoulder and watching him warmly.  “Just trust me. Everything will be alright. Look at you already. You and Shiro. I never expected you, of all people, to make friends.”

Keith chuckles.  “You and I are friends, aren't we?”

She smiles softly at him. “...Yes.  Of course we are. But I don’t count.  How long have we know each other? I held you as a baby.  I wiped the snot from your nose. I changed your diapers.”

Keith laughs, patting Shiro on the chest.  “He’s the nicest person you’ll ever meet. Shiro’s not a problem.”

“...I suspect Krolia doesn’t know about him?”

Keith presses his lips together tightly.

“Hm...  About these crossroads, Keith: just make sure, whatever it is you’re doing, you’ll be careful.  I know you’re cautious of Lotor, everyone knows that, even him. I want you to make sure you’re on your feet if he ever tries to go after you.  Maybe just stay away from him altogether. I don't like the way he looks at you.”

“Like I'm prey?”

She nods slowly.  “You're a threat to him.  I have a feeling he'd love to get rid of you.”

“Maybe he already has...”  Keith murmurs. “Maybe this is all his secret plan to separate me from Krolia.”

“You're still here.  If you need me for something, you know where to find me.”

 _As long as it’s within her tightly lined limits_ , Keith thinks, but doesn’t say.  Instead, he chuckles, “You know, it’s funny you’re warning me.  What with that little thing you guys had going on.”

She narrows her eyes at him.  “Oh, give that a rest, will you?”

Keith snorts.  “As a kid, I found it all very hilarious.  ‘Oh, Allura, you’re _so beautiful_ .  Your eyes shine like emeralds cast across the ocean waves on a moonlit night.  And your _hair_ -’”

“Give it a _rest_ ,” Allura laughs.  “He was always very kind to me.  A perfect gentleman. Something _you_ wouldn’t understand.”

Keith just smiles at her.  “Yeah, yeah. I should get going.  Good night, _your majesty_.”

She gives him a little smack on the arm.  “I gave up that life, remember? Just be on your toes out there.  Keep your head clear. Just be ‘Keith’. Keith is a force to be reckoned with.”

“Okay,” Keith says quietly.  “...Thanks, Allura. For the antidote.”

“Here,” she says, opening a little drawer and taking out a vial of small capsules.  “You should be almost out of them, right?”

“Oh,” he says disheartened.  “Right. Thanks.”

“You’re not slacking on them, are you?  They’re important.”

“No, no.  It’s fine.  Thank you, Allura.”  He crams them in his pocket.

“Did you want me to do the other potions for you?  It won’t take that much longer.”

The night won’t last forever.  Shiro won’t either. Keith isn’t sure the sort of excuse he could make to ask if they could sleep in her house, in the dark, during the day.  It’d be too suspicious.

Allura tilts her head, eyebrows raised.  She pats his shoulder. “Well, I’ll be here if you change your mind.  Come back and visit me soon, will you? It gets boring out here.”

“You can visit me too, you know.  I’ll give up the lighthouse for you.  You could stay forever.”

“Well, I’m honored, but you don’t have any farm animals.  Where’s the fun in that?”

“Bye,” Keith sighs.

“Goodbye.”  She turns her eyes to Shiro and says in a voice that seems more genuine than her ambivalent look feels, “nice to meet you, Shiro.  Goodnight.”

“That actually went pretty well,” Keith hums happily as they cross over the bridge and go on their way.  “I got the antidote, she was in a good mood -” he shakes the bottle of pills she forced him to take and groans.  “I got _these_.”

“What’s the medication for?”  Shiro asks. “Everyone keeps mentioning it.”

“Right, well, when I was a baby, my parents were killed, right?  I don’t really remember it, but apparently I got hurt and when you’re that young and you have vampire venom in you, I guess it grows with you?  Becomes part of your bones. It used to make me sick as a kid, apparently. My body wasn’t sure if it wanted to start turning or not. I don’t really remember, but Krolia does.  And so Allura’s been making me this stuff since forever.” He sniffs, rubbing his nose. “...I’ve stopped taking it though.”

Shiro blinks over at him.  “What? Why?”

“Well...I figured if you ever change your mind and want to try out my blood...”  He shrugs. “It’s a vampire antivenom. I can’t imagine it’d do you any good. And besides, I haven’t noticed a difference.  I’m older now and my bones have stopped growing.”

Shiro’s quiet for awhile.  “...You should take the medication, Keith.”

“If there are any bad symptoms that start popping up, I’ll restart it.  But I’m okay right now.”

Shiro sighs but then he goes sharp, tossing his hand out to Keith to slow him.  “Do you smell that?” He says.

Keith gives him a look.  “Human nose,” he mutters lowly, but he tries to listen for any sounds.  “What is it?”

Shiro nods him over to a hill and Keith crouches low, peering over it.

It’s a small group of travelers.  A family. A husband, a wife, and three kids.

“Vampires,” Keith hisses, hand already around his knife.  He’s ready to attack them, every one of his senses going on high alert, when Shiro gently places his hand over Keith’s.

Keith looks up to Shiro’s eyes.  Keith is wired. Ready to spring.  Shiro is as calm as the ocean’s surface after a storm.  “...They’re not hurting anyone,” Shiro says.

“But...”  Keith mutters lowly, then trails off, turning back to the family.

Shiro’s right.  They’re not doing anything at all.  They’re just walking. One has a rabbit in its hands that it drinks from and the sight is raw and jarring for Keith, but how many rabbits has he had to kill?

Keith’s breathing has picked up.  The muscles in his neck are tense and his core is one tight knot.  This doesn’t feel right to just sit and watch pass by. He’s basically vibrating out of his bones.

“They’re singing,” Shiro murmurs.

All of them.  Their little voices, cheery and bright as they make their way through the forest.  The kids hold onto their parents’ hands as they chirp happily.

Shiro’s watching them closely, like a dog at attention, something sharp and raw in his eyes.

Longing.  Hope.

“Where do you think they’re going?”  Keith murmurs, watching Shiro closely.

“Why don’t we ask?”  Shiro hums, pushing himself up from their hiding spot and walking down the hill.  “Hey there!” He calls.

“ _Shiro_!”  Keith hisses in disbelief, trying to race after him and pull him back before they see.

Of course he’s not in time.  They turn, jumping in fear, their hands going to their hearts.

Keith grabs onto Shiro’s arm tightly, afraid of what they’ll do.  Shiro cannot be hurt. He’s already so weak and without blood. Keith goes for his knife as he imagines everything that could go wrong, but Shiro steps in front of him and grabs Keith’s hand - tightly, stopping Keith from moving.  Keeping Keith’s hand in his, he smiles to the others, friendly and unassuming.

“Travelers?”  Shiro asks them.

The parents just stare stiffly, but one of the children nods her head.  “We’re going someplace safe.”

The parents hiss at her to stay quiet.

“Ah, that sounds nice.  We’re travelers too,” Shiro says softly.  “It’s okay. I’m a vampire too. We won’t hurt you.”

They relax at that as their eyes scour Shiro over, taking his features in.  They let out tense breaths. “...But you have a human with you,” the father says.

“We’re together,” Shiro says.  “He won’t hurt you either.”

Keith’s hand twitches for his knife.  He hates this. He knows how unfriendly his face must look because he can see it reflecting on their faces as they look between him and Shiro with doubt.

“...Humans and vampires...?”  A child asks, frowning. “...Why?  How? Are you...a couple?”

They look to Keith.  He sees the hope in their eyes that they’re desperate for, like it could be the secret to something that’s baffled them for ages.  Keith nods slowly.

Shiro doesn’t deny it.

“Really...?”  They breathe.

“I’ve never heard of such a thing,” the father mutters.  “All we’ve seen is chaos and strife. We’re leaving this place.  We hear it’s safer elsewhere. ...We’d tell you where, but...”

“It’s okay,” Shiro says, holding a hand up.  “Our place is here anyway. But I just wanted to say hello.  It’s not often I get to have a civil conversation with my own kind.  You hear so many terrible things...you start to believe them. I saw you were eating the rabbit.  ...Does that work?”

“Blood works,” the mother says.  “We’re all animals, are we not? You don’t have to do what the stories tell you to.  You know what people say about stories and stereotypes. You shouldn’t believe them.”

Shiro chuckles softly.  “...Sounds like good advice.  I’m sorry to disturb your night.  Good luck finding a new home.”

Keith’s hand still trembles in Shiro’s as the family turns hesitantly and keeps walking.  Shiro grips Keith back tightly, but he has a soft smile on his face.

He looks down at Keith who is about as tense and unhappy as a cat in a bath.  “...You okay?”

“Don’t do that,” Keith chews out.  “Don’t just run out like that without warning.  You scared the shit out of me.”

“And yet, you ran out with me.”

“I thought they’d attack you!”

“I’m a vampire too, Keith,” Shiro murmurs lowly.

“God.  I know.  ...I know, it’s just...ingrained in me.  It’ll take awhile to calm down.”

“Okay,” Shiro whispers, giving his hand another squeeze.  “Should we start walking?”

Keith nods curtly and they turn, headed back toward the lighthouse.  Shiro doesn’t let go of his hand. Slowly, Keith’s shaking calms.

They cut through the forest in search of the shore.  It’s a bit longer than going directly through, but the view is worth it and they have time.

It’s different out at night.  It always is, like they’ve stepped into another world.  A snake lounges lazily on the sand, a black majestic wave.  Keith sees a little crab. He’s finally calmed down enough to let go of Shiro’s hand.  He chases after the crab, laughing to himself at the way it travels, all proper and fiesty.

“It seems so stupid since the ocean is literally right out my window, but I actually haven’t been on the shore in ages.  I forgot how stupid these looked when they scuttled like that.”

“Aww, I think they’re kinda cute.”

“Look at its little pincers,” Keith laughs, kneeling down over it and following it back to the shore.  As the tide slips up the shore, some foam gets in Keith’s face and he spits it out, rubbing at his cheeks.  “Do you think you could drink its blood?”

“Uh...” Shiro laughs as he watches Keith run along the ocean’s edge.  “I don’t know. It smells weird. I don’t think its blood is like ours.”

Keith snatches it up from the ground and holds it squirming out to Shiro.  “How can you say if you’ve never tried?” He frowns as it squirms. “Ow...”

Gently, Shiro lowers Keith’s arm back to the sand.  “I think maybe you should let it go.”

“Hm,” Keith says, watching Shiro for a long moment before lowering it back down.  “Fine. As you wish.” Keith tosses another grin at Shiro and then starts walking again.  “I’m surprised you could resist though. He looked pretty tasty.”

“No, he didn't,” Shiro laughs.  “Come here, let me see your fingers.”

“They’re _fine_.”

“It was pinching you pretty hard,” Shiro says, reaching his hand out to grab onto Keith’s anyway.

Keith heaves a sigh.  “That’s a physician for you, I guess.  Always worried.”

Shiro snorts as he handles Keith’s hands gently.  “You’re right. They’re fine,” he says, but he doesn’t let go of them.  He keeps inspecting them in between his. Slowly, he runs his fingers up Keith’s, weaves them between Keith’s knuckles and then slips them around Keith’s thumbs.  Just feeling them. “...You have beautiful hands,” he says. “Elegant and delicate...but deadly. So like you.”

“You think I’m elegant?”  Keith breathes out a small laugh.  “No one’s ever said that before.”

Shiro turns his eyes up to his, eyes catching the moonlight and glowing like stars.  “...I think you’re beautiful, Keith,” he says.

Keith feels himself burning in embarrassment.  He coughs into his hand and takes a step closer, tugging a strand of hair from his face as the soft wind blows it everywhere.  He can hear the tide rushing in and falling back; he can feel it against his feet. “...I think you’re beautiful too,” Keith says quietly.

“It doesn’t bother you?”  Shiro asks. He still holds one of Keith’s hands in his.  “...That I’m...I’m part of the ones who killed your parents?”

“No, you’re not,” Keith says.  “I mean, I’m not trying to discount that you’re a vampire.  It’s just, though you are a vampire, first and foremost, you’re Shiro.  All you’ve done is help me. ...And I’ve needed that lately,” he says quietly.  “So thank you.”

“Of course,” Shiro says softly.  “All _you’ve_ done is help _me_.”

“I told you I’d kill you like five times,” Keith rolls his eyes.  “I threatened you with poison.”

“But you didn’t kill me,” Shiro says.  “And the poison turned out to be a healing potion.”

“You’re right,” Keith laughs softly, tilting his head back to gurgle.  “Wow. The height of romance.”

“...Hey, Keith?”  Shiro says, voice very low.  The sound of the ocean’s push and pull nearly drown him out.  “Do you think... Is it possible that vampires also...get pulled in?  Compelled? By humans?”

Keith’s brow furrows as he wonders what it means for Shiro to ask.  “I don’t... I don’t think so. I don’t know. ...I’ve never known a vampire before, not like this.”

Shiro leans in closer.  He’s breathing in heavily, his chest expanding and retracting.  “I think... I think it might be true...”

Keith can feel it in his gut again.  That pulling. And with it brings anxiety spiking up into his heart.  ....What’s himself? What’s the lie?

Keith places a shaky hand on Shiro’s chest.  He tries to push away, but he can see in his peripheral the way that his other hand tightens around Shiro’s shirt, moves to pull him in closer.  “I’m sorry,” Keith grits his teeth as he fights himself. “I can... I can go if you don’t want this.”

“I do.”  Their bodies slip together, chest to chest - a perfect fit.  “...I’ve never wanted anything more. You’re the most beautiful, generous, _good_ person I’ve ever had the pleasure of meeting.”

No one has ever said that about Keith.  No one has ever looked at him like he was something precious, like was something worth getting closer to.  And so he doesn’t even try to fight it anymore when Shiro leans forward, grabbing Keith’s face between both hands and kisses him senseless.  Keith feels that tug in his gut burst and obliterate his senses. He revels in the overwhelming twinkling of starlight. This air of being here, with no one else, just Shiro.  Keith kisses him back with as much feeling as he can.

Maybe they’re both bewitched.  Maybe there’s some outward force telling them that this kiss feels like _home_ and they should give in to it.  That it feels warm and comforting and full of patience and care.  Because vampires aren’t warm. And it’s got to be freezing tonight without the sun...

But Keith doesn’t care, whatever this is.  Keith feels like finally... _finally_ , he belongs somewhere.  Shiro burns like the sun beside him.

Keith meant for it to be chaste.  A kiss on the lips, maybe a small breath of air between them as they pull away shyly, pressing forehead to the other and then taking a hesitant step back.  Maybe they could laugh about it and go on with their night. He doesn’t want to push Shiro.

But Keith loses himself.  He clutches onto Shiro’s collar and pulls Shiro down with both of his hands, making Shiro moan a little with pleased surprise.  Desire boils deep in his belly and begins to spread through his veins. He feels that desire use him and he lets it, grabbing at Shiro without restraint wherever he can get his hands on him.  Over the hard muscle of Shiro’s back, the arms of his that he wants to use to help others, the strong and sturdy jaw. Keith wants Shiro to himself. All to himself. Every last bit of him.

And by the way Shiro is moving, hands digging deeply into the flesh of Keith’s hips, the mannerism unlike his soft gentle nature, Keith has a feeling Shiro feels the same way.

Shiro breathes out sharply, like some part of him is trying to pull away, but the majority of him desires more.

“I..I’ve never felt like this before.”  Keith breathes out a small moan as Shiro’s leg slips in between his and a wave of longing grips into the depths of his core and up his belly.  “Ah... Is this how it usually is?”

“It must be the compulsion thing,” Shiro presses his words out as desperate kisses against Keith’s neck, along the bruises that are still there.  He grits his teeth and pulls away, but his hands slip beneath Keith’s shirt and he feels along Keith’s core.

He clears his throat as he desperately tries to look anywhere but Keith.  “Uh...” He lets the word hang there between them. He bites at his lip. Keith can see the sharpness of his fangs.  The lust in his eyes that he tries to blink away. “...We should go.”

“I want to continue this,” Keith says, not letting his hands go of Shiro.

“I know,” Shiro clears his throat again, holding Keith in place.  “I know. But the sky’s starting to lighten. We shouldn’t stay here.”

“Oh,” Keith breathes.  His body is burning. His hands are two iron vices on Shiro’s arms and he doesn’t think he has the strength to step back.  But Shiro’s right. The sun isn’t here yet, but it will be soon, especially if they lose themselves in this. Keith closes his eyes tightly, tries to fight off this feeling, tries to pull himself from its sticky hold.

“I’m sorry,” Shiro breathes.  “This is my fault.”

The way his voice rolls.  It’s so smooth, like velvet.  Keith basically groans just at the sound.  It’s too much. It’s way too much. He feels the way his heart is thumping hard in his chest.  It’s unlike anything he’s ever felt. This can’t be normal, this amount of wanting. He feels like he’s going to explode if he doesn’t get Shiro.

“I don’t....  I don’t think I can move.”  Keith tries to swallow but finds he can’t do that either.  His mind is so caught up in Shiro, it’s like all his body knows how to do is move in closer.

“Here,” Shiro says gently, pulling Keith up into his arms.  Keith blinks in surprise, arms instinctually going around Shiro’s neck, his legs tightening around his waist.  “Is this okay?”

Keith nods quickly as Shiro starts to walk the both of them back toward the light house.

“I...  Is it always -?”

“-No,” Shiro says firmly.  “No...I... This is too strong.”

Keith just breathes, long drawn breathes, weaving his fingers through Shiro’s hair and focusing hard on _not_ running his mouth on Shiro’s skin.  He tucks his head in Shiro’s shoulder and breathes him in.  He’s squirming.

“I don’t know what’s right, Keith,” Shiro whispers.  “I...is it foolish of me to think there’s something between us beyond what I am?  I mean, you...you hunted people like me all your life. And now, you suddenly...this... _us_?  I don’t want to be your downfall.”

“I want this,” Keith breathes, trying to press his body against Shiro’s tighter, feel the pressure between them, feel the way his bones can crush against Shiro’s.

“I know you feel that way now, but I...”

Keith swallows hard.  His hands are shaking.  “There’s...there’s a potion to pull people from compulsion.  I have it in the cabinet. I’ve used it before. It should work.”

“Yeah?”  Shiro breathes, voice brightening.  “We’ll use it.”

Keith can hear the sound of a door being shoved open and the familiar warm click of boots against wooden floor.

“Keith, which one?”  Shiro asks.

Keith rolls his forehead against the soft cloth against Shiro’s shoulder, presses his lips to his collarbone.  His eyes are closed.

“ _Keith_.  Come on.  Answer me.”

“Uh.”  He blinks up, unable to focus his eyes enough to look beyond Shiro.  “Green.”

“The green one?”

“...Mm.”  He goes back to placing slow careful kisses along Shiro’s shoulder.

“Keith, come on,” Shiro mutters, voice tight.  “I can’t...concentrate when you do that... I have to put you down.”

Keith tightens his hold desperately over the clothes on Shiro’s back, his gut dropping with fear.  “No. Please. Don’t let go of me. I _need you_.”

Shiro breathes out shortly.  He’s panting too, biting hard at his lip.  “Okay,” he whispers. “I won’t let go. But please, try to let me focus.  I feel like I’m losing my mind.”

Keith clenches his eyes shut.  “Me too. ...God. God, this freaks me out.  I...It’s like I have no control over myself.”

“I won’t hurt you,” Shiro whispers, gently brushing Keith’s hair back as he stares into Keith’s eyes like a moth to light.  “You’re safe.”

“I know,” Keith whispers, tilting his head back to kiss Shiro again.

Shiro moans into his mouth, setting Keith on the edge of the table and scooting closer into his lap, slipping his hands up Keith’s shirt.

“Wait,” Shiro says sharply, pulling back.  He shakes his head. “Wait, we can’t yet.” He grabs the potion that’s right beside Keith and crams it between them, trying to force it into Keith’s hands.  “Here. Take this.”

“No,” Keith mutters, pushing it away and trying to get to Shiro.

“Keith, no.  Please,” he whispers.  He grabs Keith’s face in one hand and forces him to look into his eyes.  “I don’t want to force you into anything. ...If you drink this and still want me, then...then it’s fine.  Okay? But I -”

Ugh.  Keith just wants to get this over with and then kiss Shiro senseless.  He grabs the potion, downs it, and then shifts forward to take what’s his.

But he stops suddenly, intaking a sharp breath.

He feels himself change.

The fervent out of control heat fades from his limbs.  His mind clears a bit. He blinks a few times and he feels...awake almost.  He turns his eyes to Shiro’s...

He can see the layer of hurt in Shiro’s eyes as he watches Keith.  The sadness, the bit of disappointment. “...Better?” Shiro whispers.  He lets his hand trail down Keith’s face, the soft sad remnants of a last touch, before he places his hands away.

Keith nods slowly.  “Yeah,” he breathes out.  “...Yeah.” He scratches at his face.  “More like myself.”

Shiro nods quickly too.  “Good,” he mutters, pulling away.  “I’m glad.”

Keith snatches his arm up in his.  “ _Wait_ ,” he says.  “Where are you going?”

Confusion shoots across his brow as he lets Keith pull him back.  “I...” He jerks his thumb back at the curtain. “It’s about to get light.  I’m getting tired. I should just...go.”

Keith breathes out, opening his arms out for Shiro again, “take me with you.”

Shiro blinks at him.  He pauses for a moment, the softness of dawn lighting him up from behind.  “Yeah...?”

Keith nods, biting at his lip.  “Yeah.”

“...Okay,” he whispers.

Keith’s basically still in his lap, but Shiro pulls Keith in closer and gathers him up in his arms.  When Shiro sets him down on the bed and pulls the curtains back over the doorway, Keith leans up to claim his kiss.

It’s soft and sensual, still not the way Keith had first expected it.  But it’s so warm. It’s so good. He places his hands tentatively on Shiro’s chest and feels his own heart flutter with excitement as Shiro moans softly in his mouth.  He places his hands over Keith’s and holds him there.

Shiro breaks the kiss off for a moment to ask in confusion, his breath hanging between them, “...I thought...?”

Keith nods slightly, thinking hard.  “...It’s different now,” Keith says. “My head’s clear but I...  I still want you.”

A small smile grows on Shiro’s lips.  “...Yeah? But I’m -”

Keith’s hand shakes a little but he smiles right back at Shiro.  “...Despite our differences, we’re still on the same page. I admire everything about you.  The person you were, the person you _are_.  You’ve treated me with only kindness and respect...not as a weapon, not as a killer, just as myself.”

“You’re not a weapon,” Shiro whispers back into Keith’s space.  “You’re human. You have wants. You have fears. We all do. Well, I...I _did_.”

Keith seeks out Shiro’s hand and squeezes it gently.  “You _do_.”

They smile at each other, the soft flickering of candlelight around them.  “I think you’re really special,” Keith whispers between them. “And I don’t mean ‘for a vampire’, I mean...your heart.  Whether it beats or not.”

Shiro smiles crookedly as he places his hand over Keith’s heart.  “I think you’re special...for a vampire hunter.”

Keith laughs, the happy clear sound of it confined to this one room.

“I’m kidding,” Shiro leans in close to whisper in Keith’s ear.

“...Kiss me,” Keith says, looking up into Shiro’s warm eyes.  “Kiss me. I want you to. _Me_...and only me.  Not any outside forces...no compulsion, no magic.  ...Just me.”

Shiro cups Keith’s face in both of his hands and Keith lets him tilt his head up.  He smiles up at Shiro brightly, his eyes stripped of defenses. Just Keith.

He hardly has to lean forward to kiss Keith.  It’s different this time. This time there’s a certain sprinkling of knowledge that this isn’t a farce.  They both know now that it’s pure, untainted desire. That they really do want the other.

“You know, I lied earlier...”  Shiro breathes between kisses. He runs his mouth down Keith’s neck, stopping on those bruises again where it’s tender.

Keith’s breath hitches.  It’s painful, but it somehow makes the feeling run deeper, the touch more pleasurable.  He clutches tighter to Shiro’s arms, back arching. “A-ah... Hmm?”

“...I don’t really think humans can use compulsion...but how else would I explain this feeling inside of me?”  Shiro asks, brow furrowed. “My partner before... It was never like this, not even close. It was nice, but that was it.  I’ve never felt like this either. It’s like you’re consuming me...and I want you to.”

Keith doesn’t know either.  He’s never allowed himself wants.  This is all new. Excitingly new. Here, in Shiro’s arms, he doesn’t have to worry about the others.  He doesn’t have to worry about things that plague him during the day. He’s with Shiro. He closes his eyes and lets his mind fade.  He focuses just on the sensation of Shiro’s mouth, the softness of his lips, the gentle caresses of breath against skin.

He feels so good and that’s it; that’s all his mind has space to process.  It’s like heaven. He doesn’t worry about right or wrong. He doesn’t worry why Krolia’s left him, or if he can get back to her in the future.  He doesn’t worry his team will perish without him. He just sits in Shiro’s lap, reveling in the touch of Shiro’s hand on the skin of his back, or the hardness pressing against his leg, on the feeling of being _wanted_.

Him.  Keith.  Wanted as a person and not just for what he could do...

He wants to thank Shiro; he feels it on the tip of his tongue, but he holds it back.  It’d be weird, wouldn’t it?

Thank you for this kiss.  Thank you for touching me.  Thank you for holding me tightly.

...It’d be weird.

So he just tilts his head to the side, arches his back, and rocks his hips forward against Shiro’s lap.  Hears the pull of breath into Shiro’s lungs. Feels his body go electric.

The hands at his back dig into him harder.  They grab at Keith’s body greedily in a way that makes Keith start a little.  He hadn’t expected it out of Shiro’s gentleness. But it feels good. He doesn’t mind the way Shiro digs his nails through the skin of his back, marking him with his desire.  Or the way Shiro bites into his neck and -

Shiro’s biting into his neck.

He’s drinking Keith’s blood.  Small, soft noises of relief as he rises onto his knees and hunches over, taking Keith into himself.

Keith’s eyes fly wide.  His breath goes uneven and high.  His hands clutch tightly to Shiro’s waist for a moment because _wait_ .  Shiro didn’t _want this_.

But then Keith is hit by that feeling...  That one he always gets around Shiro, only it’s _more_.  So much more.  It’s golden and rolls over him in velvet waves that drag him under and his body just melts beneath it.  He’s drowning, drowning, drowning beneath the tide that is Shiro. He feels himself go as lax as putty. Feels himself give in completely.  He hears his defenseless gone moan. Just...enjoys the way he feels. It’s too much euphoria pumping through his veins, infiltrating his mind.   He wouldn’t dare resist.

His consciousness begins to fade.  He gives it to Shiro wholly. His hands slip from Shiro’s sides and his whole body follows.  And he’s out.

 

━━━━━━━━━━━❖━━━━━━━━━━━

━━━━━━━━━━━❖━━━━━━━━━━━

 

When Keith blinks back to himself, Shiro’s back is turned to him as he leans on the side of the bed on all fours, panicking, tears catching on the sunlight that pours in through a crack in the curtains.

Keith can hardly move.  He fights to. Sluggishly rolling onto his side to get to Shiro.

“...Shiro,” he mumbles.

Shiro can’t hear him.  He’s a mess. It sounds like he’s sobbing.  His breath is jagged and wrong. Can a vampire cry?

Keith reaches a hand out - he can manage that much - and tries to touch Shiro, but before he can make contact, Shiro hunches over, throwing up.  Blood splatters all over the floor and hits the walls. ...Keith’s blood.

“God,” Shiro wheezes as he stares down into the red.  His hands grip his hair tightly. Blood leaks out the corners of his mouth and down his chin.  It’s gruesome. Keith is transfixed for a moment, staring at the contrast of his blood over Shiro’s pale skin.  “ _God_ , _no_.”

“Shiro,” Keith tries to whisper again, but he hurts all over.  He can’t get his voice out. He reaches his hand up shakily to his neck and feels it - raw and throbbing.

He heaves himself up, using his arms to support himself.  “Shiro...” He says again.

Shiro whips around wildly, his eyes wide in fear.  He pulls away from Keith like the devil’s after him, but his boot squeaks and he slips in the mess of blood.  He falls onto his side.

The sun is out.  Keith can see it through the crack on the ground.  If Shiro gets out there, he’ll die.

Keith pushes himself off the bed and falls onto Shiro.  He tosses his arms around Shiro’s neck and pins him there to the ground.

“Don’t,” he growls lowly as he feels Shiro try to shift.  “...Don’t.” He’s breathless. He feels...horrible, he can admit it to himself.  But he won’t for Shiro. “I’m just a little dizzy,” he murmurs, closing his eyes as vertigo pulls him off the face of the earth.  His eyes jerk as he spins in sick lurches. He shoves his face into Shiro’s chest hoping to ground himself, which is still heaving in panic.

“I’m _so sorry_ ,” Shiro whispers in horror.  “I didn’t mean it. I didn’t mean it at all.  One second, I was... And then the next, I... I don’t know what’s wrong with me.  You should just kill me. You should just kill me right now. I’m obviously not safe.”

“You’re starving,” Keith breathes, pulling his head up to frown at him.  “You’ve gone past your limits. Anyone would be ravenous.”

Shiro’s eyes are so wide, Keith can see the whites of them, the way his pupils contract.  “I could’ve killed you. I almost did.”

Keith sighs heavily, letting his head fall back on Shiro’s chest.  He closes his eyes. “...I’m fine,” he mumbles. “I just need to lay here for a bit and I’ll be as good as new.  But I can’t rest if I think you’re going to leave. ...You’ll hurt yourself, Shiro...and that will hurt me. Don’t go out there.”

Shiro shakes his head slowly, still punishing himself.   He shoves a hand to his face and breathes out shakily.

“Promise me, Shiro,” Keith says firmly.  “Hey.” Shiro doesn’t respond. “ _Hey._ ”  He pulls Shiro’s hand from his face and makes sure he sees the seriousness in Keith’s eyes.  “Don’t go out there.”

“...God,” Shiro breathes.

“Come on,” Keith whispers, shifting off of him tiredly and trying to lead him back up to the bed.  “...I’m already feeling a little better. Come on. Light’s got to be up, right? You’ve got to be exhausted.  ...Sleep. You’ll feel better when it’s night again.”

“Keith, I’m sorry,” Shiro whispers, letting himself be guided by Keith.

“I already told you it’s alright.  I wanted this. I hope it helps you.”

Both of their eyes go to the blood splayed out on the floor.  It’s a lot of blood... A lot wasted in neither of their bodies.

Keith lets himself fall onto the bed.  He’s so damn tired and achy. This wasn’t good at all.  And now Shiro’s upset.

But Shiro’s panic is slowly starting to calm itself.  The misery is no less clear on his face, but at least his hysteria is mellowing out.

“It’s okay,” Keith soothes him softly.  “You’re alright. I’m alright. We’re both okay.”

Shiro looks to Keith, lets his eyes hold Keith’s gaze.  It’s like he wants to say something but he doesn’t know what.  He turns slowly and then closes his eyes. Hopefully he’ll feel better after a long rest.

Keith doesn’t though.  He sleeps heavily and wakes feeling even heavier.  His limbs ache, his joints burn. ...His bones burn.  That’s a new one.

As he pulls himself up, he can feel the small jar of pills Allura gave him in his pocket.  He looks at the bag of potions he forgot to deliver to Kolivan during the day and he’ll probably get in trouble for it later, but he’s too exhausted to care about it now.

He looks down to Shiro and his heart does a hesitant little flip.  The kiss was good. The distance between them had closed. But after...  Keith sighs. He wishes it didn’t hurt Shiro so much. Maybe he’s just imagining things, but it seems like the dark circles under Shiro’s eyes are a little lessened.  He fears that’s all the blood he’ll ever be able to get Shiro to drink from him.

Keith can see out the curtains that evening awaits.  The sun is beginning to settle down for the night, slipping behind the ocean’s horizon line.  Keith wearily picks himself up, looks down at the blood stain on the floor, wonders if he has the energy to clean it, and then he decides it doesn’t matter if he does or not because Shiro doesn’t need the reminder.

He goes for the basin in the bathroom, but the water has dried up.  God, he’s been such an idiot, letting things go like this. Groaning and smacking his face blearily in a bad attempt to wake himself up, he grabs the water bucket, unlocks the door, and climbs down the steps.  As he leaves the lighthouse he can see the lights on in the distance at their base. His heart gives a funny little churn. ...Krolia’s home.

He misses her.  He misses all of them.  He just wants things to be alright again.  But he knows he looks like shit - pale and bitten and he still hasn’t cleaned the gore from his neck - so he can’t go.

In fact, he slips down the rocks and through the sand in case someone happens to be looking out and catches sight of him.

But god, he’s dizzy.  If he were smarter, it probably would’ve been best to just wait until his body started to feel better, but he’s not.  He leans against a tree for a few moments and closes his eyes. He lets the warmth of the sun wash over him. And then he peels himself off the tree’s support and goes to the water pump.  He means to place the bucket, but it slips from his hands instead. He means to sit, but he falls to his knees and sways still, his hands not enough to keep him up.

Bad idea.  He slumps into the floor, groaning softly.  He didn’t tell Shiro where he was going; he forgot to leave a note.  What if he passes out and Shiro wakes up to no one?

He forces himself to breathe, slow and steady.  In and out. He’s got to center himself and control his body.  It’s surprisingly easier than pulling away from kissing Shiro.

He sits up groggily, rubbing at his face and trying to focus on his vision next.  He wants that fucking water. He still has to make it back to the lighthouse, but that seems impossible right now.  He looks out into the ocean instead, where the waves churn moodily. What was soft and still earlier now speaks of a shitty day tomorrow.  Keith can feel the storm rolling in, smell it in the air.

He turns when he sees movement in his peripheral.

It’s Kolivan.  He’s walking from the manor up the path to the cliffside.  ...He’s going to the lighthouse, right where Shiro sleeps.

 _Shiro_.

Panicking, Keith pulls himself up and struggles to run to beat Kolivan there.

“ _Kolivan_ ,” he calls, waving his hand as he stumbles through the sand.  “Kolivan!”

Kolivan stops walking right at the doorstep.  He frowns down at Keith as Keith pants and heaves from running that short distance, resting his weight with his hands on his knees.

“...Are you sick?”  Kolivan asks. “I was just coming to check on you.  It’s unlike you not to report in.”

“I...think it’s still the antidote in my veins.  I’m not feeling right. It’s fine. I probably just need rest.”

Kolivan’s quiet.  “...Did you go to Allura’s like this?”

“No.  This happened after.  It’s fine. What did you need?”

“The potions...”  He’s still giving Keith a funny look.  “Come, follow me. I don’t want you to fall down the stairs alone like this.  I think you need a doctor, Keith...”

“I - I can get the potions,” Keith stammers.  “I’ll deliver them. It’s fine. I was meaning to just now.  I want to speak with Krolia, anyway. I don’t need a doctor.”

Kolivan turns, frowning down at Keith.  He opens his mouth, probably to tell Keith he can’t talk to Krolia right now, when he pauses suddenly.  He notices something. He takes a step closer. “...Is that... _blood_?”

Oh, god.

Oh, no.  Keith forgot about the blood.  He takes a step back, further into the shadows.  “I haven’t washed my clothes yet,” Keith says quickly.  “It’s from the attack the other week.”

Kolivan is quiet for a long drawn out moment.  The ocean crashes loudly against the cliff.

Keith swallows hard.

“...We burned that shirt,” Kolivan says lowly.  “We burned all of it. We weren’t sure if the venom was anywhere.”

Keith takes a shuddering breath in.

Quietly.  Softly, Kolivan asks again, “...Keith.  Why do you have blood on your shirt?”

Keith shakes his head.  He’s not a liar. He’s hardly ever been deceitful to them, especially for things that matter; he respects Krolia and Kolivan too much.  So now, when he digs for some excuse, he can’t find one. All there is is the truth. He feels it as it squirms on his face. “...I don’t...  Uh...”

“Come into the light,” Kolivan says softly.  There’s boiling fire beneath his tone.

“It...  I...” Keith scrambles.

“ _Come into the light_.”

When Keith doesn’t listen, frozen solid to his spot, Kolivan takes a large step forward and grabs Keith by the shoulders, jerking him forward.  Keith stumbles into the lantern’s light.

“Oh, my god,” Kolivan breathes.  “The bite marks on your neck...”

“- _He didn’t mean it_ ,” Keith fights to defend as quickly as he can.  “He would _never_ do it on purpose.  He fought me this whole time on it.  He’s _good_.”  He realizes his mistake the second Kolivan goes stiff, eyes widening.

There is a long painful silence in which Keith just wishes he could erase his entire existence.  At least go back in time by ten minutes and erase his _being an idiot_ .  Kolivan says, voice dazed.  “Who, Keith?” His voice starts to raise.  He draws in a long steady breath. “ _Who?”_

Keith stares in horror up into the face of the man who raised him.   “I didn’t mean -” Keith breathes. “I don’t -”

Kolivan’s expression grows livid and the ocean crashes again, hard against the rocks.  The spray hits them. It stings.

Kolivan releases his grip from Keith and turns, stepping up the stairs, on a mission.

“ _No_!”  Keith cries, stumbling after him, but he’s still dizzy, off balance.  He’s like a baby fawn trying to follow. He falls into the wall. “Don’t!”  Keith begs. “Please don’t hurt him!”

“A vampire,” Kolivan breathes, his footsteps farther up ahead, loud and harsh down the lighthouse’s staircase.  The sound echoes all around Keith. “You’ve brought in _a vampire!_ ”

“He’s good!”  Keith wheezes, fighting with his legs, forcing his arms to pull at the walls and propel him forward.  “He’s not like we thought! He wants to change the world for the better! For every living creature! How could that be bad?”

“You’re under its spell,” Kolvan says lowly and he’s at the top of the staircase, looking down at Keith darkly, eyes pained.  “Trust me and take a step back. Let me take care of this.”

“It’s not compulsion!  I wondered at first, too, but I’ve used the antidote!  I still feel this way for him!”

Kolivan reels back in horror.

Oh, god.  Keith grips at his hair and then grabs onto Kolivan’s arm tightly.  “Kolivan! Listen to me! It’s _not_ compulsion!  You have to believe me!  He was just turned when I found him.  He saved my life - _several times!_  He hasn’t had any blood before this.  Not a human’s, not even an animal’s. I forced him this time!   He didn't want it! It was me! Blame it on me! But I swear to god, he’s the kindest person I’ve ever met.  Don’t punish him for going along with my shitty stupid plans. He’s a _good person_.”

Kolivan shakes him off and turns to the door to open it.  “Keith, listen to yourself. _Listen_.  You know better than this.  It’s just a spell. Everything will be sorted out soon.”

“Don’t kill him!” Keith screams, throwing all his weight at Kolivan to impede his path.  “I won’t let you! I _won’t_!”

Kolivan apprehends Keith firmly, pressing him to the wall with such precision that it knocks the wind out of Keith.  “Don’t move from this spot. Do you understand me?”

Keith stumbles backward as Kolivan releases him, choking and holding his abdomen.  He slips his hand over to his belt and unsheathes his knife. “ _Kolivan_ ,” he begs.  “Kolivan, _don’t_!”

But Kolivan is on a mission and Keith knows he cannot change his mind.  Keith holds the knife in his hand, ready to throw. Kolivan isn’t even paying attention to him.  He’s trying the door, but it’s locked. He steps back, ready to knock it down.

Keith can’t let him.  He will _kill Shiro_.  This is literally a kill or be killed situation.

But Keith’s hand trembles on the knife.  ...He doesn’t want to hurt anyone. Kolivan, in place of Keith’s father, has raised him all these years alongside Krolia, the best that he could.  Maybe it hasn’t been perfect, maybe it wasn’t exactly what Keith wanted, but Kolivan has always been there whenever he’s needed it.

Keith can’t hurt him.  He changes the angle.

He throws the knife hard and it thunks loudly into the door, jamming it.

Kolivan turns to him.

Keith stumbles a bit.  He feels so sick. He sags against the wall, shaking his head.  “Kill me first then,” Keith whispers. “Because if you kill him, you’ll have to kill me too.”

Kolivan stares Keith down hard.   “I grow very tired of this...” He mutters lowly.  He reaches up for the knife in the door and tugs it out, tossing it to the ground with one resolute clang.

“-No!”  Keith lunges forward, but Kolivan expected it.  He grabs Keith by both wrists and whips rope from his bag, tying his hands tightly behind his back.

“ _Kolivan_ ,” Keith growls, wishing he’d just _see sense_.

Kolivan nudges him back with his elbow.

“When you wake up, you’ll see.”

“Shiro is _not_ the enemy!  Some vampires do bad things, just like people, but not him!  We found others in the forest too, others like him! There are probably loads more, if only we gave them a _chance_.”

Kolivan is quiet, his hand on the door handle.  “...It’s strange...” he says. “Compelled people don’t usually have all this logic behind their beliefs.”

“Because I’m _not compelled_.”

Kolivan stares down at him sharply.  A long brittle moment hands between them as horrible understanding settles on Kolivan’s brow.  He shakes it away. “I hope that isn’t true. Because if it is, that means you’re a traitor to the Blade.  If it is, that means it will kill Krolia. You know how she cares for you...”

“Kolivan, please,” Keith’s voice breaks as he struggles to slip his hand from his bonds.  Kolivan made the mistake of going easy on him. He almost has his hands free. “Please. Don’t make me lose you all too. You’re all I have left.”

Kolivan stares at him for a long while, the wind raging against the outside walls.  “I never thought I’d say this, but I hope you’re its victim and it’s just using you to suck you dry.  I can’t believe this is happening to you of all people. I’m going to take care of this snake...and then we are going to get you fixed up.”

Keith rips his hands from the rope, yanks the knife from the floor and, very slowly, points it at Kolivan’s nose.  Keith’s hand doesn’t waver. He says, voice low, “if you go through that door, I will be forced to kill you. I don’t want to, Kolivan, but you are leaving me no choice...”

Kolivan closes his eyes and sighs heavily.  “Put down the blade, Keith, or _I_ will be forced to hurt _you_.  This foolishness has gone on long enough.  It’s beneath you.”

“I don’t care.  Shiro’s been more kind and gentle to me than any of you have ever _dared_ .  He’s the only one - the absolute _only one_ \- who has ever seen me for _me_ and not some sort of _weapon_ .  If that makes you think I’ve been brainwashed then...”  He shrugs. “Maybe I’m happy to be.” He says, softly, “He needs me.  If you won’t even try to listen to me, then there’s nothing else to be done.  You’re not getting through that door, Kolivan. You all mean a lot to me, but I have to protect him, even if it means protecting him from _you_.”

Kolivan’s done.  Keith can see the disgust there, blotting out any bit of him that might’ve listened.  Keith knew from the start that this is how things would go. He always knew, but it still hurts.

And that’s it.  Whatever restraint Kolivan had left is gone.  He grabs Keith by the wrist - Keith, who is already weak, and twists.  Keith cries out, dropping the blade and hunching over, and Kolivan meets him with a knee to his gut.

Keith knew this also: he never had a chance to win a fight against his mentor’s mentor.

He falls to the ground, holding his gut and wheezing in pain.

“Stay here, Keith,” Kolivan says lowly.  “I’ll deal with you after your vampire’s dead.”

Kolivan turns to see the door already open.  Keith can hear a scuffle - only he’s not part of it, still clinging to his gut and grimacing.

He looks up, stunned.  “ _Shiro_!”  He cries.

Shiro is not trained in combat and whatever advantage he might have being a vampire is immediately nullified by Kolivan, who has trained religiously all his life to handle vampires like Shiro...but he doesn’t defend for some reason.  Maybe Kolivan is just curious. Maybe it’s something else, but it gives Shiro the time to kick the knife from the ground and into his hand, shoving it hard against Kolivan’s throat.

“No!”  Keith whispers as Shiro stands over him protectively in the candlelight, his silhouette bold and fierce.  And, for the first time, Keith thinks Shiro does look inhuman. He looks like a vampire, fighting over Keith.  He stands right in front of him, protecting him, shielding him from Kolivan.

“Keith, are you okay?” Shiro asks urgently.

“Shiro, don’t hurt him!”

“He was hurting you,” Shiro growls.

“Go back inside,” Keith begs, pulling himself up weakly and trying to push him out of the way.  “Please... Shiro, I can’t stand it if you get hurt.” But his legs tremble. He swoons, falling right into Shiro, whose attention is momentarily distracted by it.  Shiro uses one arm to catch Keith, the other still holding the knife to Kolivan’s throat.

“Are you okay?”  Shiro whispers to Keith, voice tight with worry.

Keith groans softly, fighting unconsciousness.  “...We’ve got to go.”

Kolivan watches the interaction mutely.

“You’re going to let us leave,” Shiro demands, turning his attention back to Kolivan.  “We’re going to take Keith’s supplies...and go.”

“...What is Keith to you?”  Kolivan breathes out fire, staring at Keith incredulously.  At Shiro holding Keith tightly to the protective nook of his arm.  Keith leaning all his weight into him, trusting him wholly. “Some sort of pet?  A plaything?”

Shiro’s gaze darkens.

“Kolivan,” Keith whispers, voice tight.  “Please. ...He’s not like the other vampires.”

“Keith,” Kolivan says, looking down at Keith tiredly.  “You are such a fool. Listen to yourself...like some desperate teenager.  We raised you better than this.”

Keith bites at his lip to try to hold the tears back.  “No, you didn’t. ...You only raised me to fight. Maybe I _am_ like a desperate teenager.  But you never bothered to ask...  I’m not being compelled,” Keith whispers.  “I care about him.”

“After everything.  Your parents. Krolia’s family.  ...I can’t believe this.” Kolivan actually looks stunned.  The confusion. The horror. He never expected this from Keith.  The depths of Keith’s betrayal.

“Why do you have to make me choose?”  Keith’s throat burns. “Why can’t you give him a chance?  Shiro’s sweet and kind and would never hurt anyone... He’s better than any one of us.  Can’t you just trust me?”

But Kolivan is staring at the mess on Keith’s neck, at the blood soaked shirt that drizzled down the cloth, sticky and excess.  “Keith. If you weren't who you are...if you were _anyone else_...I would've killed you right where you stood.  I mean that. If I see you a next time, I swear I will.  I never want to see your traitorous face again."

“Kolivan,” Keith whispers.  “You’re like a father to me.”

“You are dead to me,” Kolivan says.  “Dead to all of us.”

Kolivan just stands there, still at the edge of Keith’s blade, face still warped in disgust.  “You’re lucky Krolia wasn’t here to see this. You would’ve broken her heart. She wouldn’t have given you mercy.”

Tears pour from Keith’s eyes as he shakes his head.  He didn’t want this. Keith breathes, his whole being trembling.

“You’re not one of us.  Get out of my sight,” Kolivan spits.  “Don’t come back.”

“Let’s go, Keith,” Shiro whispers gently.

Keith just stands there, staring at Kolivan, heart broken.  He’s always believed it, but to hear it...

“Let’s _go._ ”

Keith looks up to Shiro as he trembles.

“Come on,” Shiro whispers, brushing Keith’s hair back gently over his shoulder.  “Everything will be okay. You won’t be alone. ...I’ll be with you. I promise.”

And so, with one last hurt look at Kolivan, Keith finds the strength to go.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A BIG THANK YOU to Ana for their piece in this chapter!!! You can find it on their Tumblr [here!!](http://blackxpaladins.tumblr.com/post/178299270705/my-art-piece-for-the-sheithbigbang-i-was)


	6. Chapter 6

They’re standing at a crossroads, the rickety sign holding two arrows that point in opposite directions.

It’s kind of funny.  A crossroads. Just like Allura said, only there’s nothing to be happy about here.  They have nowhere to go.

“I have a house,” Shiro says.  “It’s a bit far out, but maybe -”

“In the village?”  Keith breathes, looking down that path.  “...Shiro. We can’t. People will recognize us.  We can’t bring a fight to them.”

Shiro swallows hard, looking down both ways.  One brings them to the village, the other brings them up the mountain, near Lotor’s territory.  “Do you have any ideas?”

In a subtle movement Keith tries to keep the obviousness out of, he leans some of his weight onto Shiro for support.  Shiro’s arm comes around Keith’s waist and he holds him tightly.

Keith grits his teeth harshly as he tries to think.  His mind is running a million miles a minute. “...Krolia knows me too well.  She’s the one who _raised_ me.  She’s the one who taught me each hiding spot.  We can’t run...! I’m...I’m too weak right now.  They’ll find us for sure. What do we do...? What do we _do_?”

“Keith.  Don’t panic,” Shiro says firmly.  “We’ll be okay.”

“You don’t know what she’ll do to us,” Keith whispers, pressing his hand to his mouth.  “You’ve never seen her torture something before. This sort of betrayal... She’ll tear us limb from limb.  ...God. What have I been doing? I’ve killed us both. I knew it. I knew it’d turn out like this, but still I -”

“-You saved me,” Shiro says quietly.  “You opened your heart to me. And I’m grateful.”

Keith looks up at him.  Tries to catch his breath.

“Everything will be fine.”

Keith says lowly, “‘Grateful’...  You won’t be grateful when she’s torturing you.  She used to keep me away when she’d do that to others, but as I got older, I saw her at work.  It’s... The things she can do without blinking an eye. Their screams...even as strangers, they horrified me.  She didn’t even know them. If it were you...it’d be _personal_ .  If it were you, she’d want to make you _suffer_.”  Keith turns from him.  “And me,” Keith whispers.  “That would be even worse.”  He’s trembling. “Oh, god. Oh, god.”

“Keith, you’ve got to stay calm.  Panicking and thinking up the worst case scenarios won’t help.  Your mind is running wild right now.”

“We can’t run from Krolia...”

“Then, before she knows, we’ll hide.”  Shiro grabs Keith by the shoulders and leans down slightly so that they’re level.  In a sturdy calm voice, he says lowly, “Where, Keith? Where’s a good place? There is somewhere around here that’ll work, I know it.”

Keith closes his eyes tightly and shakes his head.  He feels like he’s going to be sick. He can’t think.  He’s just waiting for Krolia to stand in the clearing, like some archangel ready for her revenge.  He’s scared.

With a long sigh, Shiro rises to his full height, looking around, thinking hard.  “...There was a place my family and I used to go fishing. A cave by a pond. Maybe there.”

“It’s useless,” Keith whispers.

“Well, at least it’s something,” Shiro hums, not letting himself be affected.  “If you think of something else on the way, let me know. ...But if they find us, Keith, I want you to tell them I compelled you.”

Keith shakes his head darkly.  “That will never happen. I couldn’t do that to you.”

“Well, it’s what I’m going to tell them I did.  Keith, they’ll believe it. It won’t take much. They’ll want to believe it.  And who knows...?” Shiro mutters lowly. “Maybe I have.”

Keith shakes his head, biting at his lip as he tries to think.  “That is _not_ going to happen.  ...Allura would probably take us in,” Keith whispers. “...But to put her in that position when she’s made it so clear she only wants peace.  ...She’s already lost so much...”

“We can’t do that.”

“But where else...?”  Keith turns behind them, afraid he’ll see Kolivan.  He could come after them. He could. He’s always about honor, about thinking logically of what each step will mean for the people.  And Keith’s now just deviated from his plan. But if he killed Keith without Krolia’s approval first, then he’d be overstepping. He couldn’t afford losing two people in one day.  So they’re safe for now...probably.

“There is a place,” Keith murmurs.  “A place she said no vampire would be stupid enough to go.  ...She probably would think I’d be smarter than to go there...”  He bites his lip.

“Where?”

“Have you heard of the Room of Mirrors?”

Shiro lets out a shaky breath.  “...They taught us about that in grade school.  The bloodiest grounds in this entire region. They sacrificed thousands there.  Some people at school were saying you can still hear the sounds of the sacrifice’s ghosts screaming at night...”

“Right, well, it’d be dangerous there...  No ghosts that I’ve seen, but there are a lot of traps.  But those two vampires that Krolia killed, I saw them hiding there.  A place around the back. Krolia didn’t see it.”

Shiro still looks uncertain.  “Do we really have any other choice?”

“It’s all I can think of.  ...It’ll be a risk, Shiro. That place is meant to kill vampires.  I...”

“No, I like it because of that.  You’re right - it’s a stupid place to go, so maybe it’ll actually work.  Let’s go.”

“It’s also near Lotor...”  He’s biting at his lip again.  “But I just...” He looks around them one last time, worry on his brow.  “It’ll buy us some time at the very least.”

They both hold each other’s gaze, trying to psych themselves up.  “...Let’s go,” they whisper together.

It’s cold in the forest and though Shiro had thought to grab Keith’s bag, Keith doesn’t have his gear.  It’s night. The sea spray sits in the air even here, making him feel even colder. He’s weak from blood loss.  He’s tired and emotionally drained. He feels like a traitor. And as they drag themselves through the forest, it begins to rain.

Keith cringes against it, shivering.  What else could go wrong?

Despite Keith’s constant protests along the way, Shiro takes his cloak off and tugs it around Keith.  He then, holds his hands out and offers to carry Keith.

Keith hesitates.  He doesn’t want to rely on anyone.  Rely on people and they betray you...or you betray them.  Either way, you end up alone. That ache is still fresh in his heart.

But something about Shiro always draws Keith in in every way.

“We’ll be faster,” Shiro says.  “We’ve got to get you someplace dry.  You’re not doing too well right now.”

Keith can’t argue with that and he really doesn’t want to get sick on top of everything else, so he climbs on Shiro’s back, holding onto him tightly.  He feels safe here. Secure. He tugs Shiro’s hood over his head and rests against the sturdiness of Shiro’s neck.

When they finally make it, Keith’s soaked through.  Keith can basically feel Shiro’s worry radiating off of him, but he tries to keep up morale anyway.

“I’ve never seen a place like this,” Shiro says as they pass beneath the stone gates.  “It’s beautiful here.”

It is, especially at night.  There are fireflies lazing around the debris, their soft light reflecting off the plants that thrive, the stone that hangs in there centuries old.  The small broken water fountains, the naked angel statues. It feels gentle.

And it’s quiet.  No townspeople. No ocean’s lull.  It’s just the chirping of a cricket off in the distance.  The soft sound of Shiro’s hesitant footsteps.

“Be careful,” Keith murmurs, pointing out the traps as Shiro walks into the courtyard slowly, using extra caution in the light rain.

“This is where they attacked me,” Keith says as he slips off Shiro’s back.  He keeps his hand on Shiro’s shoulder to balance himself. They look down at the clearing in the forest where the vampire’s bodies are now burned.  Krolia must’ve come back to do it. They’re just a scorch mark on the ground.

Keith stands there, looking at the mark for a long moment.  “Everything’s so confusing... Who can you trust? Who will betray you?  I know there are good vampires,” Keith says, looking to Shiro. “...But then it’d be foolish to assume each of them could be trusted.  Krolia and Kolivan trusted me, they raised me, and I...” He takes another deep breath and rubs his hand over his face, sniffing roughly.

“Keith...”  Shiro murmurs lowly.

“Come on,” Keith clears his throat and says.  He grabs Shiro’s wrist and tugs him along. “I’m not changing my mind.  I’m just... I’m confused. And seeing Kolivan’s disappointed face in my head...  I can’t get it out.”

They walk beneath the hill, along the bottom story of the Room of Mirrors.  “I saw them come through here,” Keith murmurs, peering around all the plantlife and vines.  He tries to use his hand to cover his eyes from the rain, but he still can’t see anything. He reaches forward and starts pulling at them, tearing them off.  “I know I did.”

Shiro runs his hands along the stone.  “Wait. Leave the foliage. It covers and hides this place.  Look at this area over here. It’s different.”

Keith bends down and shoves his face up to the wall, blinking through the crack.  “You’re right. I think I see something.” He pulls himself up and tries to push the stone away.  “I...It’s too heavy.”

“Here.”  Shiro shifts it, struggles only very little, and then heaves it to the side.  “All good.”

Keith smiles.  “Wow. Looks like being a vampire is good for something.”

“Yeah, definitely.  I can move stones.”

Keith chuckles, peering through.  He can’t see anything. It’s way too dark.  He digs through his bag and takes out a match and a lantern.  “Smart idea grabbing my bag,” Keith says to Shiro.

“I hoped we’d be able to use it.  Honestly, I think Kolivan could’ve taken me,” Shiro murmurs, as he steps into the room, looking up at all the abandoned spider webs.  “...I think he was giving you an out.”

“...I think you’re right.  But I don’t think he’ll do it again.”  He holds the lantern up and lets the dim light shine over the room.  “As he saw it, it was kill me or let you do it...”

“...I’m sorry to put you in this position.”

“No.  It’s not your fault.  It was my choice. I’ve been doubting my place there for awhile anyway...”

But the long term plan...  They walk through the dark hallway after Shiro repositions the stone.  There’s not much here. It looks as if it used to be some sort of living quarters, but everything’s ruined by now, more crumbled stone and rotted wood than anything else.

There’s a broken bed frame in one room, parallel to a desk, but that’s about it.  Looking around the place, he wonders if anything alive has seen these rooms in decades.

Shiro looks to Keith’s trembling form, realizes how he’s soaked through and freezing and incredibly susceptible to illness, especially here.  Shiro takes in the look on Keith’s face.

“...Maybe I can go to the village.  See if there are any blankets out hanging or...maybe some hay.”

Keith shakes his head, teeth chattering.   “They’ll kill you if they find you. Everything will get wet before you get it here anyway.”

“You’ll die of hypothermia before that.  Your lips are blue.”

Keith heaves out a deep breath.  “It’ll...dry.” There’s an old desk in the corner.  He can bundle up beneath that.

“I don’t have any body heat,” Shiro murmurs.  “I can’t help.”

“Yeah, you can.  Come here,” Keith nods him to the corner beneath the desk.  He holds his arms out and Shiro sits beside him.

“You can keep in my body heat.  See?” He shivers as Shiro’s cold skin presses against him.  “...Tomorrow, I’ll think of something else. Something dry. Something warm.  It’s not so bad.”

“My house -”

“I would like to see that.  It would be nice, but Pidge knows your name.  Lance does too. And if they know, it means they’ll have to tell Krolia.  ...And if Krolia knows, it means she’ll overturn every rock to find you. This is personal.  ...She’ll want revenge on us for doing this to her. Even with how things have been going...maybe _especially_ because of how things have been going.”  He leans his head back tiredly and sniffs.  He can see a small crack of light shining from the corner of the room where there’s a crack in the stone.

“This place seems untouched,” Shiro murmurs.

“...It does,” Keith whispers, running his hand up Shiro’s arm.  It is warmer with Shiro against him. He keeps Keith’s heat in. The rest of the world seems far away, even of the rain’s soft pitter patter through the stone walls is distant and soft.

“It’s kind of beautiful here,” Shiro says.

Yeah.  It kind of is.  The small crack on the ceiling will have to be patched up tomorrow to keep Shiro safe, but the bit of moonlight that gets in is soothing.  Reminds him of the window at home, in the lighthouse. He misses it already.

He can’t go back.  He can’t just leave Shiro like this, blame everything on him.  It’s just not an option. But that means he has to mourn them. The loss of them.

Maybe they weren’t his actual family, unrelated by blood, but they were all he had...  And in a world where he constantly feels like he has so little, the loss hits hard.

He feels so lonely, even with Shiro here, pressed against him.  He feels so lost.

If he had just...stuck to his place.  If he had done what Krolia asked of him.

 _You’re a leader, Keith_ , Krolia had told him only a few weeks ago, and now look.  How quickly things change.

He clings to Shiro tighter.  This was for something. It was the first decision he made for himself.  It was _right_.  And Shiro is something he definitely doesn’t regret.

“Thank you for staying with me,” Keith whispers to Shiro.  Because here, in this cold stone room, it truly feels like no one ever has.  But, somehow, even this feels only temporary. And then Keith will have to face this feeling again, on his own.

It’s cold where he is, and he’s so emotionally drained.  Shiro clings to him even tighter.

 

When Keith wakes up, Shiro’s asleep, head leaning against Keith’s, his arms still around him.

Keith watches him for awhile in the minimal light here.  He lets himself calm on Shiro’s beauty, on the way Shiro still keeps him close.  He snuggles into Shiro’s hold for awhile longer, trying to absorb as much of the serenity his closeness brings him before he has to face the day.

The night only got more freezing, and though Shiro did help a bit, Keith can’t do another night like this again.  He feels like shit. He needs dry blankets at the very least. Hay would be good too for this stupid stone floor. A jug for water. Food.  Another change of clothes.

Krolia might be anywhere, but Keith needs to take that risk.  He takes Shiro’s coat that’s laying out over Keith and puts it over his shoulders.  He pulls the hood up over his head and wraps a strip of cloth around the bottom half of his face in hopes he won’t be recognized.  It’s not an unusual thing for travelers to do; he’s hoping no one will notice. With one last long look at Shiro, laying him out carefully out of the sun’s way, Keith sneaks out.

There’s a small crack in the wall upstairs that Keith is small enough to fit through, but it’s mostly blocked off by ruin.  That’s good. Not many others could fit through, not even vampires, who would be absolutely destroyed in the face of the Room of Mirrors.  This place really is risky, but he’s hoping the risk will pay off.

He has enough stray money left in his bag to get everything he wants, including a nice bow bundled with decent arrows and a quiver, a decent cot, a tent, and something to fix the crack in the wall.

He hurries back as quickly as he can beneath the weight of everything he’s carrying, the knot of anxiety only releasing when he sees Shiro still sleeping peacefully right where he left him.

He sets up the tent in the corner of the room; he’s hoping it’ll help conserve heat at night, and then lays out the bedding inside.  He lifts Shiro by the armpits and drags his heavy frame in, gently laying him down.

“Okay,” Keith breathes heavily.  He’s still cold to the core, but at least he managed to find a new change of dry clothes.  After he switches into his new ones, he lays out beside Shiro and stares at the top of the tent.  He’s hung the lantern up above on the tent’s structure - it’s small and compact - and he allows himself to just lay there, staring up at its warm glow.

He curls into the blankets more.  Tries to pretend that it’s just like the days he and Pidge and her brother, Matt would get together and make forts with each other.

He wonders what she’s doing.  What Matt’s doing. Pidge claims he’d help Keith if Keith ever needed help, but what if he knew that Keith was conspiring with vampires?  What then? They were all trained to kill on sight, even the townsfolk, if they could.

Could Keith trust him to be on his side, or could he trust him to stay true to their teachings?

Keith doesn’t know.  He trusts no one.

He hears Shiro turning onto his back and sees as he blinks slowly awake.

“Hi,” Shiro says as he takes in Keith’s face.

“...Hi.  How are you feeling?”

“Alright,” Shiro says as he slowly pushes himself up to a seated position.  He looks up at the tent hanging over their heads and the blankets surrounding them.  Keith feels warmer now and he guesses his lips are no longer blue. Shiro’s eyes assess him and he lightens a bit.  “How are you doing? It looks like you went out.”

“Mm, yeah, I’m better.  I borrowed your cloak and went to town.  I don’t think anyone recognized me. ...You should eat.  We have to keep our strength up.”

Shiro flicks his eyes to Keith, his shoulders tensing, instantly on the defensive.  “So do you. I’m fine.”

“Shiro,” Keith whispers.  “I can hunt whenever; that’s not the problem.  But you... I know it scares you...but you _need_ to eat.  Just a little bit at a time and maybe it won’t be such a strong pull for you.”

Shiro sighs as he hunches forward, picking at his fingers.

“If you don’t eat, you will eventually die.”

Shiro nods slowly but it looks like a grimace.  “I know... You’re right. I don’t want to leave you alone in this.  But the other day though...it was horrible. It was like I was being controlled by something else; when I realized what I was doing - sucking the life out of your limp body - seeing you so defenseless when usually you’re like this _flame_.  And even still, I couldn’t find the strength to back off.  It was like I was standing over myself watching as I slowly killed you.  I was terrified.”

“You haven’t had anything to sustain you in weeks; you were ravenous.”

“...I had no control,” Shiro mutters.  “I don’t want to hurt you.”

Keith is quiet.  It’s Shiro’s decision.  He already knows what Keith thinks.

Shiro clears his throat and rubs at his shoulder.  “When it comes to it, I’ll think about it... I’ll... _try_.”

“Thank you, Shiro,” Keith whispers, a bit of his worry rubbing away.

Shiro smiles at him crookedly.  “Whatever happens; I’ll find a way.  I told you I’d stay beside you, right?  So I will.”

Keith smiles wearily back at him.  “I’m always open for the conversation.  All you have to do is ask.”

“I know, Keith.”

Keith clears his throat and turns his hands up to the inside of the tent.  “How do you like the setup? I even made use of our lantern.”

“You look warm,” Shiro hums fondly as he leans in, tucking the blanket Keith over Keith’s shoulders so that he’s fully covered with only his head popping out from the top.  “All of these blankets.”

“Yeah.  I think...this is okay.  Like this. Don’t you? We can stay like this for a bit until we figure something else out.”

“I think so too,” Shiro says.

“Maybe we can do what I mentioned earlier,” Keith says, “once we get settled and recuperate. We can go to some other village out north.  There aren’t nearly as many vampires out there, so it’ll be easy. We can be our own team. We can heal others.”

“...I think that sounds nice.”

“No one innocent has to be hurt anymore.  ...No one like you. We won’t kill first and wonder later.  We’ll do things differently.”

“I don’t know how to fight,” Shiro says.

Keith looks to the bow and then back to Shiro.  “Well. We definitely have time. I can teach you.”

“Yeah?”  Shiro quirks his head and smiles.  “How are your teaching skills?”

“Come and find out.”

“You must be hungry.  Let’s go hunting,” Shiro says.  “Let me go with you. It’ll be a nice lesson for me.  I wasn’t raised around stuff like this; I have no idea how.”

Who is Keith to argue?  Why would he want to? They go out together, in the forest at night, stepping carefully through the trees.  Keith laughs a little at Shiro’s clumsiness. He obviously was never taught how to do this sort of thing, being cooped up inside the house, reading medical texts.

Though Keith’s main goal had been hunting, he ends up more entertained watching Shiro try instead.

“Stand like this,” Keith whispers, demonstrating for him as Shiro watches carefully, eyes sharp and focused.  “And come closer over here, in the shadows. ...You make a rotten vampire.”

Shiro chuckles under his breath, doing as Keith says.  He learns quickly. “And somehow, you make a good one.”

“Hmm.  ‘If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a thousand battles.’”

“Sun Tzu,” Shiro hums.  “I guess you _do_ read all the books you hoard.”

“No.  Just the ones with the fancy covers.”

Shiro chuckles.

“Krolia taught me that one,” Keith murmurs.  “Which is funny because what do I know about myself, honestly?  ...Let alone my enemy.” He looks up to Shiro, who shrugs slightly.

“Enough to kick all their asses.”

“I guess,” Keith hums.  “Though you don’t see my doing it anymore.”  He turns his head to the side as he sees a deer walking past.  He grabs the bow from Shiro, slips closer, and then aims. He lets the arrow loose.  It flies, cutting through the dark quiet forest with power and intention, and strikes its target right where he had intended.

The deer falls.  It does not struggle or fight.  It’s dead.

Shiro is quiet.  He watches it with a long confused look.

Keith says, “It’s blood should still be good.  It’s when it cools that it’s bad -”

“ - I know.”  He stands there.

“You can try mine, Shiro.  That’s always open for you.  But if you want to try this too, I won’t look,” Keith whispers.  “Whatever’s easiest.”

Shiro takes in a long deep breath.  “I need to start pulling my own weight,” he says lowly.  “I can’t throw all my worries on you. ...I need to at least be as strong as I can be if you ever need me.”

“You don’t have to be alone.”

Shiro turns up grateful eyes.  They shimmer in the moonlight. He reaches for Keith’s hand and tugs him along with him.  He sits beside the deer’s still form, reaching out for its still face, brushing his hand over its eyes to close them.

“Shiro...”  Keith murmurs.

“Maybe we can save...so many others...”  Shiro whispers.

“Maybe we can.”  Keith stays holding onto Shiro’s hand.  He sees as Shiro bends slightly, staring at its face.  “I was going to kill it anyway. It won’t go to waste.”

“...Yeah.”  Shiro bends down.  He keeps his hand clinging to Keith’s tightly and Keith can feel the desperation in it.

Keith thinks he might do it.  He’s inches from its neck. But then he pulls back at the last second, rubbing a hand over his face.

Keith sits beside him carefully.  “It’s okay, Shiro.”

“I can’t do it,” he groans, staring down at the animal with hurt.  “It smells wrong... Like looking into a bowlful of maggots.”

Keith squeezes his hand and they sit there for awhile longer, on their knees before the deer’s still body, before they rise to their feet.

Krolia and Kolivan taught Keith all he needed to know to survive on his own.  He knows how to prepare the deer for himself; it’s like second nature. Each time Keith goes through the process, he tries to do it out of Shiro’s sight.  He cooks his meals in a cave away from their place, dousing the fire completely, eyes always sharp, on the lookout. It’s cold enough that the meat saves for awhile before he has to do it all over again.  And he does, again and again, as the weeks go by and they slowly adapt to the cycle.

One day, as Keith is wrapping it and looking around for the coldest place to stuff it, he turns to see Shiro waiting at the opening of the hall, watching Keith mutely.

Keith stands up, watches the hard edges of Shiro’s tight frown.

“...Tomorrow,” Shiro says.  “...Would you be okay with tomorrow?”

Keith nods slowly, afraid to do any more in case Shiro is scared off.

Shiro runs his hand along the ruined stone wall, biting at his lip.  “Okay,” he whispers, and disappears back into their room.

Keith spends the rest of the day laying in bed beside Shiro.  Slowly, he runs his hands through Shiro’s hair. It’s starting to get long.  He watches Shiro’s soft face.

He knows he should sleep, but he can’t seem to manage it, his mind full of apprehensive expectations of tomorrow, when Shiro will finally feed on him.

He’s going to do it.  Finally, after all this time of denying it.  Keith almost can’t believe Shiro asked of his own accord.

He prays it won’t be like last time.  It’s not that he really minded, but the fear on Shiro’s face.  The pain there whenever Keith happens to catch Shiro staring at the wound on his shoulder, thinking Keith doesn’t notice his hurt gaze.

But now, while Shiro is still satiated from the blood in his body.  Now is the best bet. Keith feels good about it. He finally manages to fall asleep, optimistic and eager for the next day.

When he wakes, he jams his stomach full of as much food as he can muster, drinks as much water as he can bear.  When he looks back into the tent, Shiro is sitting up, holding his stomach like he’ll be sick.

“...Are we really doing this?”  Is the first thing Shiro grumbles out.

Keith chuckles a bit, leaving the small makeshift table of a hay bale and walking back to Shiro.  He places both hands on either side of Shiro’s face and forces him to look up.

Shiro looks miserable and unhappy, but he stares up into Keith’s eyes and sighs.  “We are, aren’t we?”

“I’m up for it if you are.”

He pulls himself from Keith’s grip and rolls out onto his back, groaning.  He pats his stomach and Keith kneels down to lay out beside him.

“You can do it,” Keith says, snuggling up underneath his arm.  They both stare up at the lantern hanging on the tent’s structure.  “I can take it.”

Shiro heaves out another sigh, his eyes wandering down to Keith’s.  He looks lost. “...You _do_ seem to be getting used to my charm.”

“Your charm?”  Keith asks. “You mean your compulsion?”

“I swear I didn’t try to do it, not ever.  But I could see it on your face sometimes. You’d drift off and just stare at me.  It was the strangest thing.”

“Mm.  That’s true.  Maybe my mind has finally caught up and it now understands what a teddy bear you are.”

“Teddy bear...?”  Shiro grumbles. “I’m fierce.”

“Oh, yeah?  Like a lion?”

“Absolutely.  You should be afraid of me.”

“I’m not though,” Keith says and he’s being honest about it.  He places a hand over Shiro’s chest and leans in. “Because I know how much good still resides in this heart.”

A bit of the tension ebbs from Shiro’s posture as his mouth melts into a smile.  “Come here,” he whispers, shifting so that Keith is pulled onto his chest. Keith climbs up higher to meet Shiro’s kiss halfway.  “Do you know how incredible you are?” Shiro whispers against the corner of Keith’s mouth.

“It’s a trick,” Keith chuckles as Shiro runs his hand down his thigh and then back up, sneaking into his shirt and feeling along his waist, up and over his ribs.  “I’m just pretending in order to seduce you.”

“Well, it’s working,” Shiro whispers, grabbing Keith into his arms and rolling them over so that Keith is the one on the blankets and Shiro’s weight is pressed on top of him.  It feels good being caught beneath him, that firm and steady pressure pinning Keith in place.

Shiro pulls the collar of Keith’s shirt carefully down, running his finger over the scar there.  Confusion and strife bubbles up in Shiro’s eyes and Keith leans up to kiss Shiro deeply again, before he can start doubting this.

Keith grabs Shiro by the hips and rocks his own up, both of them moaning softly at the friction.  Keith hooks one arm over Shiro’s neck and pulls Shiro onto him completely.

“Keith, I’ll hurt you.”

“Remember,” Keith breathes.  “Remember when we were younger...?  And you saw me at those stupid town gatherings.  You thought I was strong then, didn’t you?”

Shiro swallows hard.

“You thought I could do anything then.”

“I... Well, yeah, I did.  But that was before I knew you...  You’re human...”

“I’m me.  I _am_ human.  I’m still that boy too, but grown up.  I’m even stronger now. And I can take it.”  Keith gently runs his hand up Shiro’s scalp, soothing him.  “Just a little bit,” Keith murmurs. “Please. Now’s the best time, before you start starving yourself again and become ravenous.  We’re both at our strongest right now. You can do it, Shiro,” Keith breathes softly. He closes his eyes as he feels Shiro place his palm on his neck.  Keith feels a flutter of excitement run up him at the touch. The fire lit in his belly flickers as the fans flame it He tries not to moan, tries not to scare Shiro, but he hears the hitch in his breath and he knows Shiro registers it.

“I believe in you,” Keith whispers, tilting his head to the side.

“Keith,” Shiro mutters, voice indecisive still.  Keith can feel the air shift against his skin as Shiro bows his head into the side of his neck.  Shiro’s breath tickles against Keith’s hair. Keith squirms beneath Shiro.

Shiro mentioned Keith might not be able to be compelled anymore, but Keith’s pretty sure that’s not true.  Keith feels like putty beneath his hands and nothing’s even happened yet.

He feels a tentative kiss pressed to his skin, and then the soft feeling of Shiro’s tongue against him, running along his sensitive skin.  Keith clings to Shiro’s back, breathing in deeply. His exhale is sharp and gone. His voice is almost desperate as he arches his back off the ground slightly, trying to press into Shiro the best as he can.  “...That feels good.”

“I’m going to do it,” Shiro says.  His voice trembles. He holds the other side of Keith’s neck with his hand, bracing him.

The spot Shiro had sucked on already feels hot and vulnerably raw.  “Do it. I want you to. Please. Shiro, please.”

Shiro grips to Keith’s hair tightly, braces both knees on either side of Keith’s legs, and bites his teeth into the softness of Keith’s neck.

It’s easy for Shiro; Keith doesn’t struggle.  He bites through Keith’s flesh as if through the softness of a ripe peach.

And Keith feels what he’s been waiting for.  It washes over him, turbulent, new, like he’s never actually felt it before.  It knocks any of his resistance right out. He lets out a shaky breath, pushing himself up higher to meet Shiro.

“ _Shiro_ ,” he breathes.  He’s never known he could feel this good, his body locked in the deepest depths of pleasure.  His fingers shake as they grasp at the clothes on Shiro’s back. He groans. The feeling only gets richer and richer.

And then it’s gone.  He whimpers as the feeling pulls away and though he tries to keep hold of Shiro’s back to press them chest-to-chest, there’s no strength left in his hands.

His vision is hazy, golden and swimming and there’s a fog all around him.  He lets his arms go limp at his sides, even though he wants to seek Shiro out.  He tries to groan Shiro’s name, but he’s spinning through stars.

He feels a hand on his cheek.  Hears Shiro murmuring breathlessly, “...Keith?  Keith, are you okay?”

Keith groans.  He blinks his eyes hard, trying to get them to focus.  Shiro’s right above him, face filled with concern. Keith can see two of him with his vision doubled.  But he grins. “...That was _really_ nice,” Keith mutters, sluggishly reaching his hands up to hold onto Shiro’s.  “...Again.”

Shiro chuckles wearily, letting his forehead fall to Keith’s.  He closes his eyes and breathes Keith in slowly. “...Maybe another time.  I think that was enough for now. Are you feeling sick?”

“No,” Keith whispers.  He’s gathering his bearings again.  “I just feel...kinda drugged. But it’s nice.  I feel...mm.” He closes his eyes as the spinning stops.  He lets himself sit and bathe in this feeling of gold liquid all around him, like luminescent sea foam at the edge of the ocean back home.  ...Home. With Shiro. Lazing on the beach. Feeling the warmth from the sun.

“Tired?”  He hears Shiro ask from far away.

“Mm...  Sleep with me.”

“I’ll lay with you.”

“Touch me.”

Keith feels his body shift and arms come around him, hugging him close.  He’s comfortable and held and happy.

“Mm,” Keith says as thanks.  He’s so far gone. It’s everything he’s wanted, bundled up in Shiro’s arms.  He lays in blankets of gold.

A few hours later, when Keith wakes up, groggy and disoriented, he has enough of his senses back to realize what exactly they just accomplished.

“You did it,” Keith says breathlessly, his face breaking out in a wide grin as he looks toward Shiro.  “You _did it_.  Do you feel better?”

Shiro nods in relief.  “...I didn’t realize how much pain I was in until now.  I feel so much better.”

“I’m so glad...”  He touches his hand to his neck and sighs happily as he feels his gut twist with pleasure at the memory.  “...That was...nice.”

Shiro chuckles lowly in the back of his throat.  “Mmhmm.”

Keith looks up hopefully.  “Can we do it again?”

Shiro stares at him for a moment, another question on his lips.  But then a smile warms his face and he laughs. “...I think you’re more eager than I am.”

“Did it feel good for you too?”  Keith asks, pressing his hands to Shiro’s chest and looking down into his eyes.

Shiro’s still chuckling as he watches Keith’s enthusiasm.  “God. Yeah. Yeah, it did. Like nothing I’ve ever felt.”

“Me neither.  You’re not scared anymore?”

Shiro thinks about it and shakes his head slowly.  “It wasn’t so bad this time.”

Keith grins.

And they live that like, together.

Several months pass and they fall into the rhythm of life.

They’re happy like that, at first.  Keith and Shiro, a perfect match, as long as it’s in secret.  This close to their homes, Keith can hear mention of Krolia and the others when he goes into town.  They seem to be doing well. The town is doing well without him too. And some part of him, maybe bigger than he expected, lets go with relief.  He doesn’t have to fight all the time. The world goes on without him. A bit of the world’s weight lifts from his shoulders.

Their empty hiding place becomes thicker and thicker with a feeling of home.  The hoarding problem Keith may or may not have begins to reflect even here. Books, books, and more books.  Trinkets. Five thousand candles. An alchemy setup in the corner. They replace the dumb hay bale with an actual table.

Shiro is sturdy.  Shiro is supportive.  He’s kind and sweet. Keith discovers he’s even sweeter than he initially thought.  He tries to help Keith in all the ways he can, above his own needs. And Keith tries to meet that with helping him just the same.  He tries to learn to anyway.

Keith has learned so much of the world from him.  It’s the only thing that gets him through leaving the closest thing to family he’s ever had.

And it’s nice, in a way, learning to live alone _together_ like this.  Not needing to be called on for some higher purpose.  Just...them, trying to survive, trying to adapt to life’s flow.  Trying to learn more about each other.

They hunt together.  They sleep together. They’re intimate together.  They grow a garden in various spots around the area, so that it doesn’t look too obvious but so that Keith doesn’t have to live off just meat.  It’s dangerous to go into town too much.

There’s a lake out further into the woods that they like to travel to often, laying out under the moonlight and the stars on the rocks warmed up from the day.  Sometimes they go swimming. Other times, as they get more comfortable with each other, they go skinny dipping. This corner of the world feels like theirs and theirs alone.

It’s a simple life.  A life Keith’s wanted to try.  He likes it a lot at first. There’s no one else he’d rather share it with.

But as time goes on, Keith quickly finds there are downsides too.

He’s bored.  That’s the worst one.  He loves Shiro. He loves spending time with him and holding him close and talking with him.  Everything about Shiro is _great_.  But how long can they live like this?  Holed up in the belly of this abandoned temple...  Keith finds himself starting to think, bitterly, that it was abandoned for a reason.

The most exciting part of Keith’s day is hunting, but Keith hunts so often lately that he’s starting to bring back more than he can eat.  He sees the way it hurts Shiro. He’s being wasteful with life, which is the exact opposite of what he wants to do. He tries to stop.

But he’s so - damn - bored.

He knows Shiro must be too, at least somewhat.  Their living quarters is beginning to fill with new potions and antidotes.

It’s one day that Keith spends all the sunlight out hunting while Shiro sleeps.  He wears Shiro’s clothing to stay disguised. He hears two farmers talking about a vampire attack. How blood paved the streets.  How some innocents are now dead. How Krolia didn’t appear.

Keith stands there for a moment, leaning against a tree, trying to fight the guilt that wells up in his heart.  ...He should’ve been there. He should’ve fought. ...But he was here, instead, probably washing his fucking clothes on a goddamn washboard.  And people _died_ because of it.

The simple life.  He had wanted to try it, but...he doesn’t know how much longer he can take.

He doesn’t tell Shiro.

Shiro seems content like this.  He sits about in the candlelight, book pressed up to his nose, eyes bright as he reads.  He loves to read. And then, when he gets really crazy, he’ll take some of the herbs and more obscure ingredients they’ve been hanging from the ceiling and collecting in bottles in the corner of the room, and he’ll make potions.

They don’t use them.  Why would they? Neither of them gets hurt.  But he has them anyway.

“Look, Keith!”  Shiro will light up as he holds the bottle up.  “A cure for insomnia!”

But no one will know it.

Keith thinks he should learn to be grateful.  Maybe he just needs to get used to the slow lifestyle.  Maybe he’s just being a brat.

What more could he ask for?

They’re safe.  They’re fed.

...But that’s about all.  It’s no way to live.

Keith tries to keep it together for Shiro.  But he’s starting to hate it so much that it’s boiling up and out of him.  It starts becoming that when Shiro asks if Keith wants to go out to practice the bow with him or go spar out in the open, Keith refuses.  A few days later, when Shiro wonders if they should go hunting to get more food for Keith as the supply dwindles, Keith just sighs. It’s when Keith begins choosing to stay in their tent instead of joining Shiro to go to the lake that Shiro begins to worry.  Keith had always loved to get out and go swimming.

Shiro sits before Keith, concern on his brow, holding a cooked rabbit in his hand.  When Keith had refused to go out, Shiro had gone out instead, hunting a small rabbit.  He had brought it back for Keith - prepared it and everything - but Keith doesn’t even want to look at it.

“Then what do you want?”  Shiro asks.

“I’m fine,” Keith sighs, not moving from his spot.

“You’re not fine,” Shiro says firmly, checking his forehead for fever and frowning when he realizes it’s something else, something invisible.  A fever he can cure, whatever _this is_ is a mystery.  That puts fear on his face.  “You’re going to eat something tonight.  The strawberries are ready in our garden -”

“I can get them for myself.”  Keith’s voice is sharp but he doesn’t move.

Shiro sighs and rubs at his forehead.

“Did I do something wrong?  Are you punishing me...?” Shiro mutters lowly.

“No, Shiro,” Keith sighs, rolling out onto his back and turning his eyes to Shiro.  “It’s not you.”

Shiro sets the rabbit down and crawls back into the tent to sit beside Keith.  He puts a hesitant hand on Keith’s back. He doesn’t know what to do. Keith doesn’t know what to do either.

He sees the cooked rabbit that Shiro had set outside the tent and Keith wants to say that he’s grateful for Shiro.  Wants to tell him he would eat it if his stomach would unknot itself, but he can’t get the words out of his throat.

When it hits him that this situation mirrors that of them months ago: when Shiro hadn’t eaten and Keith did everything to try to force him, Keith remembers something else too.  The more he stares, the more it hurts him: Shiro didn’t eat rabbits. He was specifically disturbed by the thought of killing them and here... For Keith...

Tears begin to well up in Keith’s eyes as he stares at it.

“Keith?”  Shiro blinks in surprise, angling himself in.  “Keith, what’s wrong?”

“You got a rabbit.”

“I...  I thought you liked them.”

“You love rabbits,” Keith whispers, pressing his hand to his face to try to push back the tears.  “You wouldn’t even eat them yourself, but you got one for me...”

“Oh...”  Shiro’s quiet for a moment as he gets up, picks the rabbit up from the ground, and moves it out of sight.  He comes back in to sit beside Keith.

“Don’t cry, Keith,” Shiro says softly, rubbing his hand in slow circles over Keith’s back.  “Tell me what’s wrong. ...And don’t say it’s the rabbit.”

Keith hiccups softly, rubbing fiercely at his eyes again.  “...I want to go home,” he cries. “I just want to go home.”

Shiro sighs lowly and presses his face into Keith’s hair, pulling him close into his arms.  “I wish we could too...”

But they can’t; they both know that.

Keith says, “What can we do here, pent up in the dark like this?  We’re just going to rot away until we die? We’re going to hide and cower like rats?  Shiro, I can’t take that...”

“Keith, no,” Shiro whispers, brushing away the tears on Keith’s face.  “Of course not. This isn’t going to be our lives forever. Just for now, as we figure things out.”

“But what are we figuring out?”  Keith breathes, his eyes scrounging desperately into Shiro’s for answers.  He only sees sadness there. “We’re stagnant. We have no goals but to survive.”

“That’s not true -”

“-Then what are they?  What can we _possibly_ do?  It’s like we’re just _here_ , waiting to die.”

Shiro sighs heavily.  He runs a hand through his hair and takes a moment to himself, collecting his thoughts.  Eventually, he says, voice soft, “Since I was young, all I ever wanted to do was help people.  And then, too early, my life was cut short. Sitting in your room the first week after I turned was...devastating.  I thought that was it. But look, I’m still here. Aren’t I...?”

Keith nods quietly.

“You’ve given me this second chance at life.  I see that now. I’m not about to let it go to waste.  ...Let’s promise each other something. I won’t give up on my dreams if you don’t.  We both dreamt of helping people. So let’s do it. Let’s promise each other to try.  This won’t be it, this isn’t the end. We _will_ make a difference.  We can push through to a place where our efforts mean something, where we can both help people.  What do you think?”

“Maybe you, Shiro, but -”

“-No.  You, too.  Everyone told me I should be something safe.  A teacher, a farmer, things I didn’t want to be.  I went against the grain, I told them no, and I couldn’t have been happier.  I want to do it again, with you this time. This isn’t the end.”

Keith nods slowly.  “...You’re right. This isn’t the end...”

“It’s the beginning of our second chance.  Let’s try our best...for every living creature.”

Keith stares into the lantern’s warm light.  “...For every living creature,” he murmurs softly.

“Promise?”  Shiro asks, holding up his pinky finger.

Keith looks to it, a small smile on his face.  “We’ll help people,” Keith promises, hooking his pinky finger through Shiro’s.  “We’ll help all living creatures in any way we can. This is the new improved us.”

“Yeah,” Shiro whispers.  “I know it sucks now, but it’s not always going to be like this.  Soon, Keith.”

“Soon,” Keith murmurs

“Promise me?”  Shiro asks.

Keith watches him for a long moment before sighing, a small smile finding its way on his face.  “I promise. It’s a metamorphosis. You more literally, but...for me just the same. It just...takes a little while for the full transformation and right now we’re stuck inside the cocoon.”

“Exactly.”  Shiro squeezes Keith’s shoulder in encouragement.

“I’m sorry, Shiro,” Keith sighs.  “...I’m sorry you had to kill that rabbit.”

“Stop thinking about it.  ...Tell me more about Lotor,” Shiro asks, for a distraction probably.  Keith shifts in his spot and lays his head down on Shiro’s lap, cuddling up to his body closely.  Letting out a soft sigh of relief, Shiro places a hand on Keith’s head and gently strokes through his hair.  “I’ve been wondering for awhile now. I don’t get why Krolia listens to him. Royalty or not, if a leader isn’t leading, then why would his people be loyal?”

Keith sniffs and runs at his nose roughly.  “The Blade of Marmora are _not_ his people.  But because of the way our factions used to be, he’s the highest on the food chain...and Kolivan and Krolia are people of respect.  This is how it’s been written for their ancestors for centuries. To go against it is blasphemous to them, Kolivan especially. He _loves_ going by what’s written.

“Even Allura used to love him, and, like I said, she’s our leader - well, could be...  Lotor loved her too, supposedly. I’m biased probably,” Keith mutters as he lets out a long sigh.  “I just felt like...he was always trying to butter people up to get more status. I hate someone who can’t just be honest.  But I suppose he just wants the same things we want: safety, to eradicate harm.”

Shiro watches Keith’s frown.  “...His means of getting rid of vampires?”

“Same as any of ours.  ...My dislike for him is nothing he’s done.  He’s always played by the rules. It’s just...Krolia’s always been strangely lenient with him.  It’s like she’s trying to make him happy or something. And I can never figure out why.”

“Like he’s blackmailing her?”

“No...  I don’t know.  I’ve asked her about it before and she always jumps off into this lecture about ‘allies’ and ‘knowing when to use resources’.”  He hums, running his finger idly over the dips and curves of Shiro’s chest. “It’s weird.”

“Weird,” Shiro agrees, his eyes going distant as he thinks.  “You know, there was this guy once who wanted to marry my sister.  Everyone else loved him and I couldn’t stand him but I couldn’t put my finger on _why_.”

“Your sister was very popular.”

“Oh, yeah.  She was really lovely.  She even fell for him which wasn’t like her.  It wasn’t really my place to tell her ‘no’ and I wanted her to find her own way, but I did try to talk with her a few times.  It gave her enough time to hesitate. And then she found him once, cheating on her with some other girl.”

“Wow.”

“And I realized...maybe it’s good to trust your intuition.  It told me to save you, after all.”

“And then me...saving you,” Keith says lowly.  “...I still don’t understand what made me do it.  You just...surprised me.”

Shiro leans his neck back on the pillow and hums.  “...I’m glad,” he says softly. “...At first, I was so scared of being a vampire.  I thought the only way to fix it was to let myself be destroyed, but...then you came along.  And now, I can see I can still be myself.”

“Yeah,” Keith says warmly.  He reaches his hands up to stroke Shiro’s face.  “I’m glad too.”

Shiro runs his fingers along the outline of Keith’s eyebrows, over the eyelids that are dark and full of shadows, then down to his lips.  Keith lets him, staring up at him through tired eyes, but he feels a spark of warmth in his chest again as he looks over Shiro.

Shiro says quietly, “...You’re not happy like this.”

“It’s a simple life,” Keith says.

“A simple life,” Shiro agrees.

Keith presses his lips together tightly.  He hadn’t wanted to disturb Shiro’s peace, but he’s asking directly, and Shiro looks like he wants to hear what’s on Keith’s mind.  “...I don’t like it. I don’t like this at all. It’s _not you_ .  You’re the only good part of this.  It’s just...being locked up in here with nothing to do, so close to home.  I _need_ to feel like I’m doing something.  I can’t just go to the countryside, become a farmer, and pretend everything else is alright.  It’s not me. But here especially...I feel like a caged animal or something. We can’t do anything like this.  I feel so useless.”

Shiro nods slowly.  “...It’s been long enough.  We could leave.”

“We - we _could_.  But I don’t know if I want to leave either,” Keith whispers softly.  “...This is our home. This is the dirt my mother and father walked. This is where you were born, where you lived your life.  This is all that’s left of us.”

Shiro is quiet.

“We’re not helping anyone like this.  Not even ourselves.”

“...So what do we do?”

Keith bites at his lip, just as lost.  “...I don’t know.”

“You want to go home,” Shiro says quietly.

Keith just closes his eyes and pinches at the bridge of his nose.  The lantern that burns steadily is warm and produces a good amount of light, but god, he feels cold inside.

They can’t go home.

“...Kiss me,” Keith whispers, reaching up to pull Shiro down by the collar.

Shiro only hesitates for a moment before he complies.  He always does. He can’t say no to Keith.

“It’s about time for you to feed again, isn’t it?”  Keith asks softly, baring his neck.

It’s not the answer to solve this problem, but Keith wants it and it does numb their pain...and Shiro can’t say no to Keith.  So they keep living that way.

 

One early morning, after spending the night together at the lake, Keith realizes he’s hungry and there isn’t any food left.  He groans, heaving himself up.

The stars are still out, but it won’t be for long.

“I’ll be back before you even know it,” Keith assures him.

“I can go for you,” Shiro says, but light is already peering over the hilltops.

Keith just smiles dimly.  He’s been trying lately. It did help to talk with Shiro, to have everything out in the open.  They haven’t thought of a solution, but Keith’s no longer internalizing, so he feels somewhat better.

“I can get my _own_ food,” Keith grumbles, but he gives in as Shiro tosses his body over Keith’s and starts kissing down his neck.

“Stay with me for a bit longer,” Shiro breathes and Keith just smiles into his kisses.

After, Keith falls asleep, wrapped in gold.  It’s not until evening that Keith wakes up again.  Shiro is beginning to not sleep as heavily. He stirs when Keith pulls himself up, face cringing as he sleepily tries to grab hold of Keith.

Keith pats his hands and chuckles.  “See you in a bit,” Keith says. He straps his bow to his back, checks for his knife, places a gentle kiss on each of Shiro’s cheeks who hums groggily in return, and makes his way out.

He no longer takes the medication Allura made for him and he’s not going to lie, he finds more cons than pros to it.  In fact, the only pro is that he no longer has to bother with remembering. The cons are that his bones ache and burn sometimes and there are times when he feels like he’s in the wrong body.  Like he has no right being him.

It’s getting to be winter though and all the animals have migrated.  It’s getting harder and harder to hunt so he has to travel a bit further each time.  It’s fine. It’s the way of the world, but still, Keith worries. The further away from Shiro, the further away he is to protect him if need be.  The Room of Mirrors is not a foolproof hiding spot. They need to move soon. They should’ve already, but...

“We can find a new home,” Keith whispered to Shiro recently.  “Somewhere still close, but...a little further.” And Shiro smiled at him and nodded, but neither of their hearts were in it.  Maybe Keith’s especially.

Everytime he hears a noise in the forest, is he secretly hoping that it’s Krolia or the others?  He tries to lie to himself and finds he can’t. Because he misses them. He misses them so badly.

And he hears it now.  The sound of people laughing deep in the woods at night this late can only mean a few things: they’d have to be brave, they’d have to be skilled to survived, and they’d most likely be vampire hunters.

This is stupid.  This is risky. Being this far out, so close to Lotor’s territory, Keith knows how low the chances are of it being Pidge, Hunk, or Lance...maybe Krolia.  But he still hopes, stepping closer to the orange flickering fire behind the tree’s cracks.

He lets out a soft sigh of disappointment as he sees.  It’s Lotor’s men. They haven’t heard him approach, so he’s safe here.  He can just step away. He knows that’d be the smart thing to do. That’d be part of the plan to live with Shiro in their safe simple life.

But then he sees what these men are laughing about and being noisy over and Keith’s stomach sinks.  They have three small vampires strung up to trees.

They’re bloodied.  Squirming. Clothes torn, revealing cuts underneath.  They’re whimpering like children would. Fear in their eyes.  Tears on their cheeks.

“ _Please_ ,” Keith hears one plead.  “Please, we don’t want to kill anyone.  We haven’t, we swear. We’ve lived out in the forests here.  How could we have?”

 _Liars_ .  Krolia’s voice is engraved in him.  But now he sees Shiro’s face, holding his hand out, brushing away the concern from Keith’s face with gentle fingers full of love saying, _I’ll stay with you_.

Keith knows he should turn back.  He has to stay under the radar, if not for himself, for Shiro.  Shiro’s tried for him. So, he needs to as well. But...

This is the sort of thing he’s usually good for.  The sort of thing his soul is screaming to do. He wants to save people.

They look like siblings.  The same tone of mousy brown hair, the small pouted lips. Family.  Tied up and being stoned together.

They’re not just killing them swiftly, not like the Blade of Marmora would do.  They’re torturing for sport. Laughing at their pain. And they say the vampires are the monsters...  From here, hidden behind the trees, Keith can see so clearly who the real monsters are and he’s absolutely sickened.  His hands dig into the tree’s branches. He’s clenching his teeth so hard that he’s getting a headache. He can’t believe their lack of empathy.

“Let you go?”  One man spits on them.  “So you can kill the rest?”

“We’ve never killed anyone!  We swear! I promise you!”

They’re children.  Keith’s always had a soft spot for children.  It’s in their eyes. Innocent. They never wanted this.  Like a child who finds their parents killed, family-less.  They never chose their circumstances. It hurts to see them punished for it.

He used to be able to drive the knife through, Krolia’s certainty mirrored in his own hand.  Now, his heart bleeds for them.

 _Let this go, Keith_ , he tries to tell himself.  Shiro’s waiting. He can’t risk this.  This probably happens all the time, what’s one more?   _Just go_ , he begs himself, but he finds he can’t.

“Cut out its guts and hang them on the tree,” one man says, laughing like he just told a funny joke.  “For decoration. See if any other vampires happen around our woods anytime soon.”

It’s not even their woods they’re in.  It’s the Altean’s.

The child rears up, eyes wide and afraid.  “No!” They cry. The others struggle against their binds, desperate to get to their sister.  To help her. Keith presses closer, his fingers going on the branches carefully. He can’t rip his eyes away from the scene.  “No, please!” They scream. “We’ll do anything!”

“ _Mom_!”  The girl cries.

It rips right through Keith’s heart.  No one comes. Her mother is nowhere.

How many times has Keith’s heart cried out the same thing, only to be ignored?

He doesn’t mean to, his feet just move on their own.  “Stop!” He roars, pushing through the tree’s branches and breaking into their camp.

The Galra all whip around, their faces going pale, recognizing Keith.  He fears maybe they’ll also recognize the strife he’s in, but it seems they know nothing.  Their backs go straight as if they’ve done something wrong. Keith’s name holds weight across the region.

“S-sir,” one mutters.  “They’re vampires, sir,” he says.  “We were going to kill them. For the townspeople.”

“What it looked like you were doing was playing with them for sport.”

They shuffle around awkwardly.

“This is cowardly behavior,” Keith spits.  “How is _this_ going to save the townspeople from harm?”

“...Like you haven’t done any different,” one is brave enough to mutter lowly.

Keith turns to him, gaze sharp.

Another seems to realize this and agree.  The man shifts near the other, posture strengthening.  “... _Yeah_.”

“In fact,” one other says, all standing beside each other now that they’re realizing there’s far more of them than there is of Keith.  “ _In fact_ , wasn’t it _your mentor_ who’s known as _the number one killer_ of vampires?”

Keith crosses his arms tightly.  “ _Killer_ , not _torturer_.”

“What does it matter?”  One says, and the others all ruffle their feathers as they agree.  “They’ll die either way.”

“They kill our kind!”  Another spits. “We’re doing good here!”

“They deserve this!  How much pain have _we suffered_ ?  Do _they_ consider how long we suffer at their hands?  That’d be the day.”

The Galra are not like the Blades.  They’re not as skilled, not as methodical.  They easily fall to shameful behavior. Mob mentality.  The only one they answer to is Lotor, who Keith almost wishes were here.  Because as much as he’d like to beat all of their heads in, he realizes that, even though he’s not with the Blades anymore, they still see him as part of them.  He doesn’t need to cause unnecessary trouble, but then...he looks up into the eyes of the young vampires, helpless, vulnerable. He’s their last hope.

All he and Shiro want to do is help people.

“Let them go,” he says sharply with as much power in his voice as he can muster.  “I’ll deal with them.”

He tenses as they all laugh.  They’re disregarding him, turning away.

“Please, sir,” the little ones plead, their eyes locking on Keith.  “Please, we won’t hurt anyone, we swear.”

“You can’t trust a vampire,” one of the men turn to Keith and loosely point a knife to his nose, like it’s a child’s lesson.  “They’re all the same.”

“We just want to live,” they say.

“Here.  I’ll give you what you deserve,” one man says.  He turns to Keith, setting his feet into the ground and grinning toothily back at Keith.  “Watch closely. _This_ is how you handle a vampire...since it seems the beloved Blades don’t know how to anymore.”

The rest of the Galra laugh boisterously, holding their bellies, drunk, probably.

The man’s knife has a blunt edge.  Keith can see it from here - uncared for, unsharpened.

“Stop!”  Keith commands.  “I can - !”

The children are crying, but the man doesn’t even pause.  He reaches up to grab her by the hair, tugs her head to the side and starts hacking through.

It is not a swift death.  Keith always made sure, even before this change in him, to make it quick.  The Galra make sure to do the opposite. The girl screams. Keith can see the agony on her face, the way her pupils constrict, the animalistic scream that tears from her throat as her blood splatters all over the forest’s floor.

And blood does splatter.  Though it might not be her own, it’s still spread throughout her tissues.  As he tears, it pours. Messily.

Keith watches on, breath caught in his throat.  The other siblings are howling, writhing as if it’s them experiencing the pain.

It would be ten men against his one...  The odds. If he were smart, he’d stop now.  He’d just leave. He could do that.

He feels himself moving anyway.  He forgets the trouble it’d cause the other Blades.  He forgets how he needs to stay under the radar. He forgets everything but the palpable agony in the air.  It’s wrecking his heart. He feels their pain as if it’s his own. Their family, torn apart right in front of them.

“I don’t think so,” he hears someone murmur in his ear from behind him.  He feels the sharp edge of a knife at his neck, pressed in such a way he can’t slip out of it.

He tenses.  “...Lotor,” he whispers.

The others turn to look at him, fear crossing their expressions, wondering if they’ve maybe crossed the line somehow.  The girl drops to the floor limply. Her head rolls from her body and Keith grits his teeth harshly at the sight. Her eyes are glassy.  Her golden hair drapes over her face, catching the moonlight.

“Keith Kogane,” Lotor says slowly, taking the knife away from his neck carefully.  He walks around Keith slowly, head tilted, crooked smile on his lips. His teeth glint in the orange firelight as if he were a vampire himself.  “Well, well, well...what are you doing here? I’ve heard a little rumor that you’re dead.”

“Dead,” Keith breathes out sharply, wounded.  “...Who told you that?”

“Krolia,” he hums, stepping over the dead vampire’s head and standing right over it.  “But she was acting awfully strange about it. Her face became all funny and pale. Now, why would she say that when you’re right here...?”  His eyes rake over Keith carefully, amused smile on his lips. “...What’s that I see on your neck?”

Keith slaps a hand onto his neck, pulling his shirt higher.  He feels the blush on his cheeks. Caught red-handed. A secret he knows is dangerous.

He swallows hard.  Opens his mouth for an excuse, for a lie, but all he can think of is how it’ll be night soon and Shiro will wake up and wonder where he is and come for him.  ...Keith’s been teaching him how to track lately. And Keith’s been leaving little hints here and there for Shiro, if he wanted to follow. He regrets it now.

“Now... _why_ would Krolia forsake _you_?  Her number one weapon?  And why would you be out here, at night, alone, a strange familiar wound on your neck?”  He purses his lips playfully. “You know how this looks, don’t you?”

Keith lets out a long low breath.  “Be transparent, Lotor. I’m not a mind reader.”

“Haxus, what do _you_ think?”

“I think it’s obvious,” he says, raising an eyebrow.  “Someone’s deflected.”

“Hm...  Something like that, you think?  A traitor,” Lotor murmurs, pretending to think about it.  “A _vampire sympathizer_ ...  Don’t tell me: are you letting one _feed_ on you?”

“No,” Keith grits lowly.  He knows he has to lie. “You think _I_ would let one do that?  Like I’m cattle? Me, whose parents were killed by them?”

“You never knew your parents,” Lotor stares right into him, a small confident smile on his lips.

Keith swallows hard, making sure not to budge.  “...Because of _them_.”

“...Let me see your neck,” Lotor says slowly, taking a step forward.  “...Let me see the damage.”

Keith knows what it looks like.  Wound after wound. It kills Shiro, who tries so hard to be careful.  The potions help, but they’re not a miracle cure. It looks like a vampire’s been feeding on him for months, just as it’s been.

It’s a private place.  It’s Shiro’s place. Keith does not give in.

They hold each other’s gaze.

Lotor makes a small interested noise in his throat and then leans down to grab the girl’s severed head by her hair.  “...She was so small,” Lotor hums lowly. “So young. It’s a shame, isn’t it? That someone as innocent as her has to be killed this way.  That’s what you think, isn’t it?”

It’s sick the way that her head swings.  Lotor is unphased by it, staring at it like some prize.  Keith spits, “I think your men don’t have to torture them like _savages_.  They’re children still.  They don’t understand. Kill them or don’t.”

“Hm.  That’s funny.  I don’t remember you being in charge...  Your name isn’t _Allura_.”

“Allura would _despise_ what you’re doing here.”

Lotor tsks, dirty look cutting through the air to slap on Keith.  “She’s not here right now and I don’t have to listen to the likes of _you_.”

“Lotor, I’m not asking for a fight.  I’m asking for you to not be the very monsters you’re trying to put down.”

“A merciful kill.  ...My family wasn’t killed mercifully.”

“If they behaved like your men are now, I can see why vampires might’ve wanted to take revenge, can’t you?”

Lotor’s eyes flash.  He throws all his disdain at Keith in one dirty look.  “You think you’re such a _saint_?  I hear what they say about you in the city - our hero, Kogane.  Our angelic savior. ‘He’s beautiful, isn’t he?’ or ‘as long as Keith is around, we’ll be safe’.  You’ve gotten cocky, Kogane. What do you think they’re saying about you now, in your absence?”

“The Blades are handling it.”

“Then what are these three doing here?”  He laughs as he jerks the girl’s head up so she’s inches from Keith’s face.

Keith tries to hold back his flinch, but he sees the dead empty look in her eyes and it’s impossible.  He thinks of Shiro. Sees Shiro in her place and he feels physically ill. He knows it shows on his face.

“I don’t think you can do it,” Lotor hisses, the amusement out of his expression as he glares Keith down.  “I think your people have abandoned you for a reason. Or did they exile you? ...Poor Keith Kogane. What did you do?  Even the people who raised you couldn’t stand to be near you anymore. And after your family abandoned you too? That’s so sad...”

“My family _died_.”

“That’s what Krolia said anyway,” Lotor says lowly.  He tosses the head away and holds out his knife to Keith.  “Prove you loyalty then.”

“Fuck off, Lotor,” Keith hisses.

“So you _are_ a traitor then?!”

_“No!”_

_“Then grab the knife_ !  What will it matter?  It’s two _vampires_.  You used to kill hordes.”

“You’ve been torturing them!”

“Or have they been torturing _us_ with their disgusting little bloodsucking bodies?  Let’s see,” he murmurs, turning to the other vampires as he shoves the knife harshly to Keith’s chest.  Keith catches it before it falls. “Which one should you kill...?”

“ _No_!”  The other two start panicking, hysteria clawing madly at their beings as they do their best to escape from their chains.  The chains hit against the trees they’re tied to, clanging loudly. “We don’t want to die! No!” They’re still sobbing from seeing their sister maimed, white of their eyes visible as they try to rear away from the bloodied sight on the floor.

“This is your find,” Keith says bleakly, looking down at the knife held tightly in his hand.  “You should do it.”

“We all know where my allegiance lies,” Lotor hums, walking between the two vampires and looking up into their faces.  “This one looks older, doesn’t he? Then...let’s go for the younger one. The baby faced one. That somehow hurts a bit more, doesn’t it?  Not that it should for you, since what we’re doing is eliminating _monsters_ , right?  You’ve done this a million times before... _right_?”

Keith lets out a shaky breath.  A million times before. Yes, that’s probably so.  But things were different then. He didn’t know back then how it was.  He didn’t shake like this back then. Or actually _see_ the fear on their faces, clear as day.

He looks up to them tied on that pole, hears the desperate pleading of the boy, begging for his brother’s life.

“Don’t kill him!”  He screams at Keith, eyes wide, body peeling from the poles.  “He’s all I have left! Not him! Kill me instead! Kill me! You have to understand!  We’re just like you!”

Lotor’s men are laughing.  Sightless with their cold hearts.

The boy is crying in front of Keith as Keith stares into his eyes, sees all the fear there.  Like Keith is the monster. He begs Keith on soft breathless whispers. Keith sees the softness of his face, the humanity in his eyes.

Monster, they say.

 _Liars_ , Krolia promised.

 _Human_ , Shiro questions.

...Rejecting this would turn Lotor’s malice onto Keith.  They might kill him. Rejecting this would hurt Shiro...

And he simply can’t do that.

Keith closes his eyes as tightly as he can and lets muscle memory take over.  That’s the only reprieve in this. He grits his teeth and tries to clamp down the whimper as he stabs the boy through.  Feels his soft abdomen give way. Feels as he pushes through the flesh. And you know? For how soft and small the boy looks, it’s not as easy as everyone always thinks.  The body has defenses to protect itself and Keith feels as he pierces through each one of them.

He makes it quick.  He hopes it’s painless.

When the boy is limp and quiet, his screams trailed off into a bloodied gurgling groan that gives to silence, Keith turns to Lotor, lifting his eyes wearily.  Lotor, who smiles, head tilted to the side as if he’s very fond of this scene. As if it warms his heart.

“I knew Krolia’s little protégé wouldn’t turn on us.  Congratulations,” he grins brightly, leaning forward to pat Keith on the cheek.  “You get to live to see another day.”

Keith remembers throwing the knife to the ground at Lotor’s feet, pushing past the Galrans as they laughed.  He remembers stumbling through the forest, seeking Shiro, then remembering halfway that he can’t lead Lotor back home, so he doubles back, covering his tracks.  Then he continues again, carefully this time. As presenceless as a ghost.

His mind is shattered and dizzied.

He feels every kill, ever death, burning in the palm of his hand.  Every life he took...

Keith hopes he can keep it together long enough to make it someplace safe, but it doesn’t happen.

He falls to his knees as he’s crossing a little bridge, a small trickling stream beneath him.  He’s breathless, hyperventilating in a way that doesn’t support his body. He can’t just panic out in the open, so he sinks over the side and slips beneath the bridge’s cover, pushing away the weeds that grow, being careful not to hurt the frogs.  He brings his knees into his chest and cries.

There is blood on his hands.  The blood of a child. He felt as the muscles in his core tensed and then gave way.  As there was fight and fire in his body and then suddenly, just nothing.

His sister’s decapitated head rolling on the floor at his feet.

The last of the siblings left, alone, in the hands of Lotor and his men, that memory of his loved ones carved into his head forever.

Sickening...so sickening...  And Keith used to be just as cold as them.

Now, it’s like holding a mirror to a vampire.  Instead of seeing nothing, like before, he sees himself.  He sees their fear, their hopes. He sees the humanity in them, maybe more than Lotor could ever hope to have.  Keith sees the evil in some, but the goodness in others.

Like people.

To lump them all together like this is naive and ignorant.  He can’t believe he was ever a part of that. He can’t believe he had ever been so blind and cruel and cold.

Time stretches.  He’s not sure when, but, eventually, he feels a hand on his shoulder and he jerks his neck up, afraid.  But he looks up into Shiro’s worried face. Gentle. Steady.

“Keith,” he whispers, cupping his hand over Keith’s cold raw cheek.  “Why didn’t you come back? What happened? What’s wrong?”

Keith grabs Shiro’s hand in his, his bloodstained hands.  He watches Shiro’s eyes as he takes in the gore. He doesn’t want to cry again, but he’s spent this whole time holding it in that seeing Shiro here, feeling his kindness is all too much somehow.  He clutches to Shiro tightly, pulling him forward into his arms and clinging to him desperately.

“...I had to kill one,” Keith whispers softly, pressing his face into Shiro’s chest, his voice breaking.  “They begged me not to. But Lotor was there. He found me out. He _saw the bite mark_.  He wanted me to prove my allegiance.”

Shiro is quiet for one stunned moment.  He clings to Keith tighter. “God, Keith...”

“I used to kill so many,” Keith sobs into Shiro’s shoulder.  “And it didn’t hurt then. I didn’t even think. But this time...  This time, I just can’t take it... I killed a child. He didn’t want to die,” he whimpers.  “Just like you. But I did it anyway.”

“Shh,” Shiro tries to soothe, rubbing wide calming circles into Keith’s back.  “It was better that way than to leave him with Lotor.”

Keith blinks his eyes wide as he realizes that’s true.  He left the oldest one to Lotor... His stomach sinks at the thought.  He can’t even admit it to Shiro, he’s burnt with so much shame and regret for his stupid actions.  Suddenly, the thought is horrifying. He left the other one to Lotor... He abandoned someone innocent.

Keith clings to Shiro tightly.  He’s always been so strong, but now that he cares for Shiro, he’s looked into his heart and found the many holes there, the many fears.  He thinks maybe Krolia was right about love. It weakens you. It’s better to step above the tide.

He starts to notice the morning light poking over the horizon.  The sky is a dusky lavender. Shiro must feel it, but he says nothing, holding Keith gently in his arms.

Keith sniffs, patting Shiro’s arm softly.  “I’m okay,” he whispers. “Come on. ...Let’s go.  We’ve got to go.”

“Keith...”

“This isn’t about me,” Keith says.  “I need to think beyond myself. I need to protect others too.”

 


	7. Chapter 7

Shiro fights sleep so that Keith can unload everything onto him.  Keith can’t get the image of those childrens’ faces from his mind.  He lets Shiro hold him tightly. Lets Shiro brush his hand away from his face and soothe him.

“It’s not your fault, Keith,” Shiro assures him even though Keith feels like it is.

He left that boy.  ...He left him.

He has to go back.  But what if something happens to Keith?  And Shiro’s here, alone, no food source, no companionship.

“I want you to feed on me,” Keith says, already pulling the collar down and exposing his neck for Shiro.  He shifts on Shiro’s lap and presses himself up.

“Keith.  I don’t know if using this all the time as some sort of escapism is the healthiest idea...”

“No, that’s not what I mean.” Keith grunts, leaning back to stare grumpily up at Shiro.  “...I’m afraid now. They know I’m around. What if they tell Krolia? ...We should leave.  That’d be the smart thing.”

They stare at each other.  It’s hard to let this place go.  It feels like the last part of them.  These are the lands Keith’s parents had him.  This is the soil they walked. This is where Krolia raised him, where she still lives.  Though he can’t speak with her or with his friends, knowing they’re close brings Keith comfort he desperately needs.

“But...if we don’t, I think you need to be at your strongest,” Keith says.  He puts both hands on Shiro’s shoulders and lifts himself to try to tempt Shiro.  “So drink.”

When Shiro doesn't go for it, Keith pushes himself up higher, bumping his neck against Shiro’s face, who grumbles under his breath.  Something about “impatience”. With a small sigh, he gives in to Keith, giving him a way to forget.

Keith is glad when he feels that familiar sharp piercing of his skin into tender muscle, then the flood of golden warmth after that turns him to putty in Shiro’s hands.  And he lets Shiro have him. As much as Shiro wants.

He doesn’t think about anything as Shiro feeds on him.  Not about the day. Not about that boy. He just feels that familiar warmth and he lets himself sleep.

And in the afternoon, when Shiro’s finally asleep beneath the blankets, Keith is ready.

“I’m going, Shiro,” he whispers to him, pressing a kiss to the curve of his jawline and watching him for a long moment.  “If anything happens to me, I... I want you to know that I...” His breath hitches. He can’t say it. He slips out the room.

He thought about it a lot beneath that bridge until now.  He’s certain: he can’t just leave that boy. He almost left Shiro that one day, as the sun crept up, but he chose not to.  He’s been so thankful for that one decision ever since. He doesn’t want to regret anything.

Maybe the boy’s dead, but Keith has a feeling...  Lotor isn’t so simple. Lotor can be cruel and complex and loves to play with people’s heartstrings.

Lotor’s place is higher up on the mountain.  The view can be quite nice if you aren’t constantly having to watch your back because of whose company you’re in.  But, looking out and toward the sea can be something else, especially in the morning haze.

And if Keith thought Kolivan’s manor was beautiful, Lotor’s mansion is even moreso, surrounded by multitudes of wild roses, in case any vampires get through.

Keith creeps over the stone walls and slips through the cover of the rose bushes, peeking up and over them to see the long tall windows and scope out any watchful eyes.

He’s uneasy.  This is suicide, coming into Lotor’s domain like this.  His goonies are just that, but Lotor and Keith are on level with each other skill-wise...  Maybe even saying that much is overestimating Keith’s abilities, especially considering he hasn’t been training as much as he used to.  Shiro is not yet on par with _Krolia_ when it comes to sparring partners.

Lotor looks younger than he is but, like Allura, he ages differently, the blood of witches running through his veins.  Keith isn’t so lucky.

Keith has been here before several times, with Krolia, and he knows where they torture their prey.  Would Keith be naive to go there knowing that Lotor knows Keith knows? Probably.

He clutches to his knife tightly.

Sure enough, through the window of the greenhouse, he sees the boy.

He’s in the only bit of shade, cut up and beaten; his skin is bright red with burns.  ...And he's moving. Keith grits his teeth.

This is clearly a trap.  Keith can’t just run in and gather him.  He looks around. If he were to climb the main mansion and somehow repel himself down, he might be able to make it into the window on the roof.  The vines of the roses that grow up the mansion are filled with thorns, but they look thick and sturdy. Enough to most likely hold Keith’s weight.  It’ll have to do.

Keith climbs up them, being extra careful to fit his foot into each brick to make sure he has some alternative hold if need be.  He hangs onto the side of the window when he gets there, trying not to look down as he approaches the third floor.

“Okay,” he whispers, looking over his shoulder to see the greenhouse below.

It turns out to be easier than he thought, bypassing the front doors that he sees people watching.  He opens the top window and looks down inside. Inspects the way the boy has been tied up.

There’s no way to cut it from here.  Tsking unhappily, Keith snaps the bottom of a thick vine from the wall of the mansion and tugs it over to use as a rope.

He repels down and lands in front of the boy.  He doesn’t even stir.

“Hey,” Keith whispers.  “...Hey, wake up.” He pats the boy’s cheek firmly and the boy starts, taking in a deep breath, his confused gaze slowly finding its way to Keith.

“... _You_ ,” he hisses loudly.  “You’re the one who -”

“Shh!”  Keith presses his hand over the boy’s mouth.  “I’m trying to rescue you!”

“...Rescue...?”  The boy stares in confusion.  “You killed my brother... You let my sister die!  You’re one of them. Maybe worse, you coward!”

“There aren’t enough words to apologize to you...but please, we can talk later.  Right now, cooperate and maybe we can get you out of here.”

“I didn’t actually think you’d come,” the boy murmurs lowly, turning his eyes down in what almost looks like regret.  “But Lotor said you would. You’re such an idiot... I’m bait.”

Keith lets out a shaky breath.

“Looks like Krolia didn’t teach you that well after all," Lotor says behind him.

Keith knew it was a risk.  ...He thought to take it anyway.  And now, these are the consequences.

He hangs his head, rubbing his hand over his hair as he heaves out a sharp sigh.

“So you’re not just a vampire advocate.  You’re out here _saving_ vampires now?  I honestly wondered if you’d come, but there was something in your eyes as you killed the younger brother.  Something told me that my patience would be greatly rewarded. And here we are.”

“...Lotor, you have to listen to me.  They’re not like we thought,” Keith says lowly.  He knows how it looks swooping in here. Lying won’t do him any favors this time.  “Some are evil, yes, but so are some people. You can’t kill an entire village just because one of them has done something bad.  Punish the one who did it, not the village.”

“Strange...”  Lotor murmurs as he watches Keith, eyes bright as a snake.  “...They used to sing songs about you and your bravery. ...I don’t understand how one could fall so quickly, so hard.  What happened?”

“If you would just try to _see_.  You’ve been so blind.”

Lotor watches him for a long time.  “When was the last time you spoke to Krolia?”

Keith blinks.  “Krolia...? What does she have to do with anything?”

Lotor’s smile grows on his face slowly, sharply.  He looks more like a vampire than the actual vampire in the room.

“You don’t know?” he murmurs in dark amusement.  “Word on the street is that she’s been hiding her son from us for decades now.  ...I’m not going to lie, I thought it was _you_ at first, but that was before she cast you away as trash.  And then I thought...Krolia would never cast _you_ away, not after all the work she’s put into training you.   _Unless_ , she’s lying.  Unless she’s passed on the sacrifice to your hands to make it look like she cast you away, while actually hiding the sacrifice even further from me...  The vampire that you’re letting _feed_ on you...  And suddenly, things started to make a little bit more sense around here.”

Keith stares in surprise at him.  “....Her son? But...her son is dead.  She’s never said anything to me about him.”

“Did she not?”  Lotor hums, unenthused.  “Why did she train you all these years?  Why did she focus so much of her attention on _you_ after her son ‘died’.  Unless, she hid her son away after all these years...  Trained _you_ to take care of him.  And now, you’re his keeper.”

Keith shakes his head.  “The fuck are you saying?  Krolia would kill me if I got anywhere near a vampire.”

“The marks on your neck say differently.”

“And notice how I’m not with her anymore!”

“The sacrifice,” Lotor murmurs, clasping his hands and pressing them to his mouth, deep in thought.  He’s not listening. He’s on some mad idea that doesn’t even make sense. “You have the sacrifice.”

“I don’t have _anyone_.”

“That’s what the inscription reads...   _When the sacrifice’s blood is spilt, the gods shall cry.  The rain clouds in the sky shall become holy and that of acid for vampires, and cleanse this wicked land of their filth._  She had the sacrifice all along...hiding him from me, _lying to me_ whenever I came to ask.  You and all your selfish Blades...heralded for being heroes, worshipped for protecting everyone, and yet, all along, you’ve selfishly clung to the one thing that could help us get _our proper revenge_ .  Well, no longer...  Now, she’s passed him on to you.  Now, the sacrifice will be _mine_.”

“I _swear to god_ she’s never even _mentioned_ anything like that.  I have no idea what you’re talking about!”

“Lead us to him,” Lotor whispers.  “Lead us to Krolia’s son.”

“Her son is _dead_.  If only you could see the hurt it brings her each year.”

“That’s just what she’s said this whole time.  Allura and Kolivan believed her, so I thought there was no reason to argue, but what _if_ ,” Lotor says sharply.  “What if her son only got bitten...and _survived_?  What if he turned into one of those vampires and she hid him away?  Clinging to him selfishly. ...What then?”

“And she’d just...what?  Trust him in _my_ hands?”

“The warrior boy she created herself,” Lotor whispers, pointing the tip of his blade to Keith’s nose as he assesses Keith through envious eyes.  “My father offered her more riches than you could ever imagine to train me and she turned it all down. But she took some orphan boy for free? Maybe that’s exactly why she chose you...  You had nothing. And when you come from the bottom of the line like that, it’d be so easy to manipulate you into seeing things her way. You wouldn’t think on your own. I get it. I finally get it.  It never made sense. ...Until now.”

The bright relief in Lotor’s eyes makes Keith feel sick.  “Your entire _scheme_ makes no sense.”

Lotor just smiles at him sweetly.  “Don’t play coy, Keith Kogane. Tell me where he is.”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“Yes, that’s exactly why you have fresh bite marks on your neck.”

“He was some random villager I picked up, I swear to god.  He has _nothing_ to do with Krolia or Kolivan or any of them.  I had to leave because they wouldn’t accept him.  He could barely walk through the forest without tripping.  He’s only just been changed a bit ago.”

“I’m _done_ speaking with you.  I’ve wanted this all my life and now, it’s finally here.  Right in time for the blood moon when the gods see best through the stars.  Everything’s lining up like it was meant to be. It’s _perfect_ .  Enough with the games.   _Where is he_?”

“Lotor,” Keith breathes, shocked Lotor could be this fucking stupid.  “Why on earth wouldn’t Krolia be with her son if he were alive? You know how she loved him.  Why would she send _me_?”

“Because she _trusts you most_ , are you _blind_ ?  She can continue on with her life while the two of you can go off playing hooky.  I’ll only say it one more time. _Bring me to him_.  You don’t have any chance of escape.”

The Galrans have indeed closed in around him.  The vampire behind Keith is watching them all tiredly, resigned to his fate.

Keith’s eyes flicker over to the boy and then back up to Lotor’s narrowed eyes.  He draws himself up, indignant. It’s not like there’s an option at all. “You won’t have him,” Keith whispers.  “He has nothing to do with Krolia. He’s innocent. I refuse to take you to him.”

Lotor stares down at Keith in disdain.  “...Fine,” he mutters. “Then if you’re not lying, Krolia won’t mind what happens to you.  And once I’m done with you, I’ll find your vampire and I’ll spill his blood in all the ways you fear most.  ...I’ve never liked you much anyway.”

 _No_ .  “He has _nothing to do with this_ ,” Keith yells.  “He’s completely innocent!”

Lotor laughs lowly.  “...Who knew, the Blade of Marmora hero, compulsed so hard into believing the good of vampires, he’s switched sides.  Did the vampire fall for you too? Is that why he’s keeping you? Like some sore of _pet_.  ...That’s so disgustingly pathetic that I almost feel bad for Kolivan and Krolia.  They had so much respect for you before all of this...” He taps the tip of his boot to the ground and pauses as if he’s in mourning.  And then, he says, as if he does this sort of thing everyday, “Hold him down.”

Fighting all of them will give Lotor more fuel to get his revenge.  Begging will only make Lotor seek harder. Shiro isn’t Keith. He’s learned so much in this short amount of time Keith and Shiro have had together, but you can’t fit twenty years of training into as many days.  The best thing Keith can do for Shiro is succumb.

They grab Keith roughly by the arms, forcing his knees to the floor, completely incapacitating him in their tight grip.  “If Krolia knows you’ve hurt me...”

“Then she’ll come after us and give us the excuse that we need to kill her.”

Keith closes his eyes tightly.  He knew it. He _knew it_.  But everyone wanted so hard to trust Lotor.

“She’s a traitor to the people.  Hiding from something like this, something that’s been written for centuries.  She’d rather have vampires kill the innocent than give up her monster of a son.  Did she think she could hide this forever? I’m interested to see how Kolivan might react when he finds out the truth behind her.  ...Well. I might wait a little while longer until that. Maybe we’ll try to use her for the blood moon. I think it might work if we surprise her.  A sacrificed vampire’s what started all of this, why wouldn’t a human with mucked up blood work? Worth a shot.”

Keith just shakes his head.  Krolia’s smarter than Lotor. She’s stronger than Lotor.  That’s Keith’s only relief in this. She won’t fall prey to him, not like Keith so easily has.

“Now guess what happens next...”

“You kill me,” Keith spits, gritting his teeth, trying to think of a way out of this.

“No,” Lotor says and it brings Keith up in surprise.  He stares into Lotor’s smug face with confusion. The harsh evening light, bloody and hot with reds and oranges, pours in from behind him.  “That’d be stupid. If I killed you liked this, Allura would find out and she’d get upset...she likes you, always has been fond of you. And then Kolivan would have a reason to come after me.  No. Killing human Keith would be a very _very_ bad idea.  But...killing _vampire_ Keith...  Now, that would just make me a hero.  And then maybe, if we’re lucky, Allura might even come back to mourn you.  And then we’ll tell her about Krolia’s cowardice. Have her vampire son she’s been hiding to sacrifice.  A win-win for me all around.”

A vampire.  Turning Keith into a vampire.  Keith’s blood runs cold. No, he doesn’t hate them.  He cares for Shiro deeply. He’s not bitter about him being a vampire at all.

But Keith?  Keith as one?  He’s only ever been human.  That’s the only part of him the Blades can appreciate.  That’s the last thing left of him that the Blades don’t _hate_.  To take it away?  He’s never even considered it.

“They’ll thank me, even.  For taking your miserable life.”  Lotor looks down his nose at Keith, his sharp teeth glinting in the light as he smiles.  “What do you think?”

Keith just gapes in horror.

Lotor laughs lowly, taking the sight in.  “Mm. ...Get the vampire.”

The other Galra take the vampire boy down and shove him to his knees in front of Keith.  Keith and the vampire stare hard at each other. The boy looks scared, the whites of his eyes clear, the tightness of the muscles in the back of his neck, but the primal fear from the night before is gone.  He no longer has anything to lose.

“Here’s the deal,” Lotor says flippantly to the boy.  “I care far less for your life than I do for this little vampire hunter’s here.  Turn him and I will let you go.”

A lie.  Keith knows a liar and Lotor’s it.  But what can the boy do? His hands are literally tied.  And Keith knows this boy owes him nothing. Maybe he wants to bite Keith...and how could Keith even blame him...?

The boy trembles, staring at Keith with hesitation.  Keith believes what he said earlier; he looks as if he never bit into a human before.  He trembles as he looks into Keith’s eyes.

“But he doesn’t want to be turned,” he says.

They circle around them, laughing lowly.  “Did you hear that? He doesn’t want it.”

“God, they sicken me.  Them and their fake innocence.”

“Bye, Keith Kogane,” Lotor murmurs lowly.  “It was nice while it lasted.”

The sun is beating down over Keith’s head, through the foggy glass windows.  Even if Shiro were awake, even if he knew where Keith was, he could not help him here.

The boy leans down, breathes out a small, “I’m sorry” - Keith can feel his shivering breath on his neck - and he grabs Keith by the arms, pulling him into the shadows and biting down into the soft flesh of Keith’s shoulder.

Keith expects it to be familiar.  The sharp piercing of fangs into flesh followed quickly by the flood of relief.  The giving in. The _wanting this_.

But it doesn’t happen.  This is pain, sticky and thick, slapping a hand over his mouth and choking him of air.  This is a spider’s web, wrapping its tight strings over Keith’s joints, tugging him together so he can’t move.  Constricting him.

It is not warm, nor is it golden.  This is something else. Something Keith can’t sink into.

It is an absolutely vile feeling boiling through his veins and deep into his core.  Every bit of him is rejecting the feeling with repulsion. This is not compulsion, nor is it working.  Keith still has the power to fight through it.

He has to get back to Shiro.  He can’t just _leave_ him.  He thought he could save this boy; he was naive _again_ .  A simple life.  He needs to learn to be content with it...because this...?   He can’t do this to Shiro. Why was he so _stupid?_

The boy is messy and unsure.  He tears apart at Keith’s flesh.  Over his neck. He doesn’t know what he’s doing.  Like he said, he’s never bitten a human before.

The Galra have dropped their hold on him though, giving him to the vampire, expecting what Keith expected of it, what always happens to victims of a vampire bite - Keith falling limply beneath the power of it.  But he’s not. He won’t.

Keith knows he’s got one moment of surprise and the rest is up to him.  He’s got to take advantage of this gift.

With one giant heave, Keith pushes the vampire off of him, slips a Galran’s knife from his loose, unexpecting hand and jams it right through Lotor’s foot, pinning him there.

He just needs that extra moment.

Keith runs.

He sprints right past the stunned Galran soldiers and Lotor’s wide eyed expression.  He presses his hand to his neck and stumbles through the haze in his mind. Pulls off the remnants of these spider webs binding him.

He’s got to make it back to Shiro and they’ve got to _run_ .  And somehow, _somehow_ , he’s got to warn Krolia that Lotor is fucking nuts.

But first, he’s got to lose these guys.  He knows without seeing that they’re after him.  He’s usually faster than them and he tries to believe it’s still true even now as he hops through the forest and scrambles over rocks.  But Shiro fed on him last night and he feels the warmth of his blood down his chest even now, even after the pressure he pushes there with his hand.

He tried to save that boy...this is what he gets.  He should’ve just kept his head down.

He can’t return to Shiro if they’re on his trail.  He leads them down the mountain and slips carefully behind a large boulder when he thinks there’s enough distance between them.  The blood is going to be a problem soon, so he takes the moment to breathe and tear his knife through the bottom of his cloak. He bundles a bit up, presses it to his wound and then ties a strip tightly around his neck, choking a bit at the pain.

No time for that.  He can hear them shouting nearby, too close for comfort, “ _where is he_?”  And so he slips back behind the trees and tries to dart through the shadows.

He wishes it were night.  He’s gotten used to night’s advantages, the darkness that aids him, his partner at his side.  There’s none of that now.

He runs for a long time, pulling through the trees, winded - it feels a lot longer than it probably is.  He can’t take much more. He slows. He hopes he’s in the clear, but then he sees as someone catches sight of his dark clothes in this bright forest and he curses internally, the stress of having to double back _again_.  ...He’s getting tired.  The blood loss is starting to mess with his vision.

He’s choking on blood somehow and he turns a desperate eye toward the swamp.

No one wants to go there.  It’s grey. The water is filled with shit and smells somehow worse.  It pulls at you. Impedes your speed. There are tales of monsters in there.  It’s where you dump bodies when you want them to disappear. Even the trees scattered throughout the grey stew are leafless and dead, their branches stretched up desperately toward the sky, reaching, never finding purchase.

If this were a knife fight, it’d be one thing, but Lotor has a bow and Keith has impaired vision and dulled reflexes.

He tries to run along the edges of the swamp - maybe he can make it to the seaside, where there are jagged rocks and empty caves...a terrain he knows better than they do - but he’s starting to see double.

He’s lost too much blood.  He won’t be able to make it.  He can’t even tell where the edge of the swamp actually _is_.  Avoiding it is impossible.  He missteps and he slips, skidding against the mud and falling sideways into it.  The grey of the swamp rises up and around him, clinging to him, pulling him down.

“ _Shit_ ,” Keith chokes, or tries to.  Nothing comes out. His hand clings to his throat tighter as he realizes with dread: his voice is gone.  He can’t talk. His throat won’t allow it.

The wound.  It’s damaged his vocal cords.

...He’s got to get to Shiro.  And _quick._  He can’t make it much further.  He just can’t.

He pulls his weary self to his feet and begins pulling through the grey.  It pulls back harder. The air quality is noxious, almost as thick as the swamp itself, a gas that chokes.

He can hear Lotor catching up.  He can hear their laughter. He knows this won’t be enough, not unless there’s a miracle.

“Keith Kogane,” Lotor calls.  He’s not winded at all. His voice is as proud and regal as ever as he stands atop the swamp’s edge, looking down at Keith, a grin on his lips.

The sun sets, bleeding along the edges of the horizon.  Blood red is fading into darkness.

Blood is dripping from Keith’s torn throat, leaving a thick trail behind him as he forces himself forward.  Even as his vision sends him swaying. Even as darkness sets over his vision.

“The swamps is an interesting choice for you.  They won’t even find your body after what finds you here.  No one will be able to prove wrong whatever story I weave. You’re not very smart, are you?  But then, Krolia’s always been fond of idiots, hasn’t she? Her husband. _You_.”

Keith can hear the sound of the bow pulling back, the tightening of the string, the noccing of the arrow.  He grits his teeth, straining with his legs to make it through this impossible sludge. _Please_.  He has to get to Shiro.  One last time.

Lotor snickers, his voice low and content.  “God. You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to do this.  It’s sickening the way people idolize you. For what? Loving the very creatures who kill them?  I wish I could tell the world what you’ve done. The truth behind their _hero_.  But this will just have to do.”

Keith hears it before he feels it.  A solid thunk right through his chest.  A tug forward, like he’s been pushed roughly from behind.  He stumbles from the force of it, his arms catching himself on an old rotted log.  It dips beneath his weight.

He chokes at the pain, trying to use his arms to pull himself up, to keep going.  He can’t just leave Shiro like this. He can see Shiro now in his head: waking up alone in their room they’ve slowly filled with bits of themselves, in a life they thought they could keep.  If only Keith had just listened to sense. But now, Shiro’s going to have no one. What will he do?

“We’re going to find your little vampire, Keith Kogane.  And we’re going to slaughter him like a pig...right in front of Krolia.  With his sacrifice, these lands will be saved from their evil. And then we’ll tell her how we had to put you down like a _dog_ .  Like a _vampire_.  All of it together?  It’ll ruin her.”

Another arrow cuts through Keith’s chest.  He looks down, presses his fingers there to the sharp tip.  He can’t cry out or yell. He curls over the log and writhes over it.  He’s starting to choke, a raw gurgling sound all he can manage. He can’t breathe.  He coughs up red on his hands and he blinks down at it as his vision sways.

“Now, let’s go find Krolia’s little vampire.”

No...  No, no, no.  Not Shiro. Anyone but Shiro.

Keith wants to fight for him, but his body is failing.  It’s up to Shiro now. Shiro and the things Keith taught him.  Keith prays it’ll be enough.

So this is it.  Keith kind of had a feeling that he wouldn’t last long the second he stepped out of the lighthouse and turned from Kolivan.  Like Shiro said, trusting your intuition is key. And Keith felt it: it told him to stay away from Lotor, but he thought that the little vampire needed a chance to be saved, just as Shiro gave Keith his chance.  And Keith just couldn’t stop himself. This is who he is.

He’s draped over a log in a horrible smelling swamp, this shitty log barely able to hold up his weight, the grey of this toxic sludge rising up to slosh against his face.  This isn’t any kind of hero’s death. And though he dreaded Krolia killing him in his bed that one time, it sure as hell sounds better than this. He would've been home, at least.  Surrounded by those he loved.

He’s not sure how long he lays there, waiting...for what?  But he clings hard to life, trying to deter the fading he feels as his eyes fight to close on him.  He clings for a long long time. He’s not content with this. He doesn’t want to die like this; it doesn’t feel right.

Shakily, he turns his eyes to the stars in the sky.  Allura said good things were going to happen, right? She saw them written in the stars.  In _his_ stars, or...however it works.  This isn’t it. What did she see?  How did he mess it up?

He thinks he might be starting to hallucinate: he hears someone off in the distance.  Someone he wants to see. Death giving him one last gift before he leaves this world for good?

It’s Shiro in the distance.  He’s waist-deep in this sludge, pulling through it, making his way to Keith.

Keith reaches a shaky hand out to him, sees the way the moon shines on both of them.

Shiro’s there, clasping his hand tightly, looking Keith over.

“ _Keith_ ,” Shiro breathes.  “ _No_.  No!”

Carefully, like he’s handling broken glass, he lifts Keith’s body from the log and cradles him gently in his arms.  There’s terror in his eyes.

“Who did this?!”  Shiro cries. “How could this happen?!”

It’s him.  Not some dream or hallucination.  It’s Shiro. Thank god. Keith can tell him about Lotor.  He can get Shiro to warn Krolia too somehow.

Keith reaches up for his face, tries to force the words out, but nothing more than a rasp makes it out.  He just chokes up blood. His neck is too damaged. _Lotor_ .  He tries to say.   _Krolia_ .   _Warn.  Krolia._ But he can’t.

Shiro’s hardly paying attention, afraid and frantic, his hand going to the arrows that have torn through Keith’s chest.  He can’t pull them out or Keith will die. He can’t leave them or Keith will die.

 _Krolia_ , Keith tries to say again but the words don’t come out.   _You_ .  Keith raises a blood stained hand to Shiro’s face and points.   _You_.

“What?”  Shiro cries, grabbing Keith’s hand tightly in his as he tries to press down tears.  They look dark in his eyes. “Oh, god, Keith. Allura. Can she help you? What do I do?  Where do I bring you?”

Keith cringes and tries to shake his head.  It’s too late for him, but not for Shiro. _You_ .  He chokes, slipping his hand from Shiro’s again and pointing to Shiro’s chest.   _You_!

“Keith.  Keith, I don’t understand...  Keith, hang in there. I’ll get help.  We can fix this.”

They’re in danger.  Keith is so scared for them.  It’s one thing if Lotor ends his life, but Shiro, alone and defenseless, as confused as he is now, wondering what to do...  Keith led him to this point. It’s Keith’s responsibility.

He can’t warn Shiro like this.  He can’t help Krolia like this. Keith knows a mortal wound when he sees one and here, he sees three on himself, stamped into his body.

He can’t leave Shiro alone, not when Shiro just found a reason to live again, not when he just started smiling untainted by the world’s sorrows again.  Keith and Shiro were going to change. They were going to discover their limits, figure out who they could be. Keith can’t leave him alone in that, not now.  They promised they’d do it together. No matter the cost. Even if the cost is this...

He won’t leave Shiro.  He won’t.

He loves these people.  He’ll protect them, no matter what it takes.

 _Shiro_ , he tries to say because he needs support for this.  He’s scared. He wants to do it but he’s terrified as well.  This is irrevocable.

He grabs Shiro’s arm tightly in between both of his.   _Shiro_ , he mouths to him, who stares down in confusion.

“Keith?”  Shiro blinks down at him, tears falling from his face and dotting Keith’s face.

 _I love you_ , he mouths.

Shiro’s eyes widen.

And Keith bites into Shiro’s wrist.

Shiro jerks back by reflex but Keith follows him, staying clamped there.

“ _Keith_ ,” Shiro breathes.  It was different for Shiro.  Shiro was forced and he was horrified and he struggled against it.  Keith fights for it.

He can taste the blood in his mouth, mixing with what’s coming from his lungs.  He can barely swallow.

He chokes on it.  It’s thick and strong and overwhelmingly awful.  He clings tighter so he won’t stop.

He doesn’t need that much; he knows that.  But his time is slipping away quickly and he’s got to make sure he stops it.

When he’s sure, he finally lets go of Shiro’s wrist, blood plastering his ghostly white skin.  He slips backwards, his body completely spent, blood all over his face. Shiro catches him before he falls onto the log.

“...Keith,” is all Shiro can say, voice wet.  “... _Keith_.”

Keith grabs the arrowheads poking from his chest, closes his eyes, and pulls.  He gurgles against the pain, head falling back. He sees the stars plastered across the night sky.

 _Shiro_ , he breathes out on a puff of breath as he feels his body dying.

 


	8. Chapter 8

It’s the most horrible experience of Keith’s entire life.  It’s like his insides have all dried up and shriveled away.  Maybe that’s what they’re doing.

Not only is he in pain, but his body feels like it’s no longer his.  Like he’s been cut free from what he’s grown so familiar with and sewn haphazardly back into some misshapen scratchy burlap sack.

And all the while, Shiro stays by his side, brushing his hair from his face gently, pulling the blankets over his shivering form, murmuring soft comforting words.  Keith’s not sure how long he stays in this hell, trying to find Shiro’s voice through the chaos racking his body, but it feels like years of confusion and uncertainty.  He thinks he’s trapped in limbo, some in between that has no way out. He feels fear more often than not.

When he starts coming to, it’s in blips.  Shiro’s always there.

One day, Shiro is trying to feed him water and Keith finds that the thought of drinking it is absolutely repulsive.

“No,” Keith groans and he finds he can.  His throat is healing. His chest no longer feels like it’s caved in when he tries to draw in a breath.

“It’ll pass soon,” Shiro whispers, holding his hand to Keith’s cheek as he stares down at him.  “I know it’s horrible. I know. But you’ll feel better soon.”

“ _Krolia_ ,” Keith whispers, but his mind is split in twenty different directions.  He can’t remember what he needed to tell her so urgently.

Shiro just shakes his head, pained.  “It’s me. It’s Shiro. We can’t see Krolia right now.”

“No.”  Keith shakes his head and reaches up to pull at his hair.  Everything about him is so _frustrating_ and _painful_.

“It’ll be okay, Keith,” Shiro whispers.  “You’re fine. But you have to calm down.”

So why does it feel like time is running out?

He dreams of his mother.  He dreams of his father. He dreams that he’s held in their arms lovingly as they rock him back and forth, gentle soft rocks.  “I love you,” they whisper to him. “I love you.” His mother hums gently to him, brushing his hair from his forehead as he stares up at her in wonder.  “You’re my little boy, Keith,” she smiles down at his face, her eyes full of warmth, full of love. “I am _so proud_ of you.”

He wakes up with a jerk.  The face in his dreams was Krolia.

“...Keith,” Shiro follows him up from their bed blearily, groaning a bit as he rubs at his face.  “It’s alright,” he soothes, trying to pull Keith back down. “You’re okay. Come on. Rest.”

“God,” Keith breathes, looking down at his hands.

His thoughts are clear, realizing the _wrongness_ of everything.  His mind starts kicking into overdrive, trying to force him to catch up.

Everything’s different.  His senses are too strong, too much, overpowering him.  Everything’s blaring in his head. The slight shift of movement in the blankets as Shiro moves forward.  The soft dripping of light rain outside, over stone.

Outside of Keith is _too much_ , but everything inside feels too still.  Cold. Empty.

“Oh, my god,” he breathes again, winded.  The energy and warmth that blood had brought him in life is absent.  He’s as quiet inside as stone. It’s like he can close his eyes and ears and be nothing.

“Hey,” Shiro whispers, his arm coming around Keith’s back as he scoots him in close to his side.  “...It’s alright,” he says in a small voice. “You’re okay.”

“Everything’s... _loud_.”  He doesn’t mean just auditorily.

“I know.  It seems that way at first.  It’ll be a little strange adapting, but I swear it’s not as bad as everyone makes it sound.  The worst part is the eating... And the... _urges_.”  He laughs nervously, a small uncomfortable sound.  “...But I’m right here. I’ll be with you every step of the way.  You won’t be alone in this.”

“My heart’s not beating,” Keith gasps, pressing his hand to his chest and just feeling...nothing.  He’s dead. He’s _dead_.  He can’t get his mind around it.  His head is spinning.

He’s not human anymore.  He’s not _normal_.

Shiro places a gentle hand over Keith’s.  “Neither is mine.”

“But it’s...  It’s not right.  I feel cold.”

“So do I.”

“There’s no blood,” Keith hyperventilates, pulling at his clothes because he doesn’t know what else to _do_ .  “ _We’re empty_.”

“No, we’re not, Keith.  I’ve lived this way with you for months and I’ve been alright, haven’t I?  Did you think I was empty all this time?”

Keith shakes his head quickly.  “No. Not you. But me. Something’s wrong with me.  There’s nothing inside.”

“There’s nothing wrong, Keith.  You will be alright; you’re just like me.  I’ve watched you changing all this time; everything was just as it was for me.  You just need time to process this. You just woke up and you’re a little confused, but everything will make sense soon.  Are you with me?”

“Y-yeah...”  Keith murmurs, but it sounds like a question.

Vampire.  ...God. What has he done?  What will the others think?

Keith closes his eyes softly.  No. What is he thinking? ...They can’t ever know.

Keith is panting even though, distantly, he remembers that he doesn’t actually need to.  He looks down at his hands that he can hardly see in the dim light. They’re both laying in blankets together.

Vampires are different.  Vampires are stronger.

He looks outside the tent and leans forward, grabbing a stray rock and clenching it hard between his hand.  Feels as it gives.

He opens his hand and sees the bits of dust in his open palm.  For some reason, out of everything, this upsets him the most. He’s no longer himself anymore.

“Can you do this?”  Keith asks Shiro.

Shiro stares down at the dust in Keith’s hand.  He looks slightly baffled. He doesn’t rush to confirm.

“You can’t, can you?  What’s _wrong_ with me?”

“N-nothing, Keith,” Shiro murmurs softly.  “You’ve always been strong and now you’re even stronger.  We knew this was going to happen.”

“...Fuck...”  He shoves his face into his hands and tries to breathe.  Oh, god. Oh, god, he did this. He chose to do this. He’s the very thing he dedicated his life to kill.  ...How did this happen? He thinks he’s going to be sick.

He feels tears spring to his eyes and he grits his teeth, tries to fight them away.

Shiro gets to them before Keith can.  He wipes them away with his thumb quickly and pulls Keith into his arms, bundling him up in the crook of his neck and holding him safely there.  He rocks Keith gently.

But Keith feels no comfort.  He is so fucking starving that it feels like there’s a burning metal rod shoved down his throat.  With dread, he realizes what it means. He hates it. He hates it. He can’t go back. This is it.  This is his life now. He gets why Shiro stood at the edge of the forest that one day they met, staring at the horizon as the sun began to burn through the sky, waiting for the end.  Because this does feel like the end, the end of who he was. He’s scared to face who he could be from this point on.

“Shiro...”  Keith clings to him, closing his eyes tightly.  Keith is now the very person he grew up being told to hate.  Sometimes he thought he really did. Now Krolia will despise him.  The others won’t be able to look at him, disgust for what he’s become.

“It’s okay,” Shiro soothes.

“ _Shiro_.”  There’s no turning back now.  This is it.

He's not _human_ anymore.

“Everything will be fine, I promise you.”

“I’m panicking.”  It feels like he’s lost everything.

“I know,” Shiro whispers, pressing a soft kiss to Keith’s shoulder.  Shiro’s still here. He’s not letting go. “You’re doing fine. It’s a big change but you’re not alone.  I can assure you that you’ll get used to it. Faster than you would believe.”

Keith grits his teeth, feels the odd way his teeth align now, and looks down at his hands again.  They don’t look as soft. They don’t look as fragile. They’re smooth, like the small pebbles that have been tossed about at sea, that wash up on the shore as smooth as pearls.

Keith tries to unwind the tension in his body, taking slow steady breaths.  He sinks into Shiro’s hold. He trembles slightly, but he can still find comfort here, held tightly by Shiro.

“I’m sorry,” he whispers, closing his eyes.  “I’m so sorry. This is... _horrifying_.  And you went through this alone and terrified.  ...And I was cruel to you.”

“I don’t blame you.  You were scared. Anyone would’ve been.”

“If only I had known.”  Keith sniffs at tears that Shiro rubs away.  He’s so raw and confused inside. “I’m so sorry, Shiro.”

“It’s okay,” Shiro leans the side of his face against Keith’s.  “Everything’s okay for me now. And it will be for you too, soon.  We have each other.”

Keith nods slowly.  “Yeah.”

They stay there for awhile, quietly in each other’s embrace.  It takes awhile for Keith to calm down enough that his mind isn’t spinning.

“Why’d you do it?”  Shiro whispers, running his hands up and down Keith’s back.  “Why did you change yourself?”

“We made a promise, remember?  That we’d figure things out together.”  Keith closes his eyes. “I couldn’t stand the thought of leaving you...and I’d do anything to make sure it wouldn’t happen.”

And then, with a jolt, he remembers.

“We have to go,” Keith heaves himself forward and then falls immediately.  His body feels _strange_ .  Like his limbs are longer even though it doesn’t seem like they actually are.  Foreign. He tries to stand again. He stumbles to his knees again. “What’s wrong with me?  I _have to_ get to Krolia.  She’s in danger. _You’re_ in danger.”

“What?  Is this who hurt you, Keith?  What happened?”

“It was _Lotor_.  He wants that stupid sacrifice so holy water can fall.  He thinks it’s Krolia’s child. He thinks that she’s been hiding him.”

“Krolia?”  Shiro draws back in surprise.  “But isn’t her son dead?”

“ _Yes_ .  Lotor’s _insane_.  He wouldn’t listen to me.  I have to tell her. She trusts him, what if he decides to hurt her?”

“Keith, wait!”  Shiro says, grabbing onto his wrist as Keith struggles to his feet again.  “We _can’t_ .  She’ll kill us.  Look at you; if anything were to happen, you wouldn’t have a chance to defend yourself.  You’re unsteady on your feet just trying to _stand_.”

“She’s in danger.  I have to get to her before it’s too late!”

“Stop,” Shiro says sharply, grabbing Keith’s wrist and holding him there.  “We can’t just go without thinking. If she kills you, she won’t know about Lotor then either.  And if she’s as good as I think she is, as good as you say she is... Keith, you need more rest.”

“There’s _no time_.”

“ _Make time_ ,” Shiro hisses, yanking Keith to the ground hard.  “You’re starving, right? You haven’t eaten yet. It hurts, doesn’t it?  You think you’d be the only one in danger if you went to see Krolia now?”

Keith turns to Shiro angrily.  He doesn’t like these truths.

“The pain only gets worse near humans,” Shiro whispers.  “Sometimes it was almost unbearable. I fought it, god knows I did, whenever you were around, but I worry, Keith.”

“If you can do it, then so can I.”

“You were out for a week,” Shiro says loudly, voice cutting through the air.  “I was out for half a day.”

Keith blinks.  “A-a _week_ ?”  Keith whispers harshly, the words burning in his throat.  “An entire _week_ ?!   _Krolia_!”

“Keith.  Stop. Breathe.  That’s not what I meant.  Krolia is fine. My point was that obviously our bodies process the transformation very differently.  You’re turning rocks to dust in your hand. I can’t do that. ...We don’t know how you’ll react to anything.  It’s _too risky_ .  You’re running off to warn Krolia about Lotor, who probably won’t even be able to take her.  But with you, as a vampire? What if she sees you and hesitates? What if she can’t defend herself and you lose _yourself_?  What if you kill her, her dead body in your arms as you wake up out of your bloodlust?  Keith, that’ll kill you.”

“ _Stop_ ,” Keith hisses, stabbed through by the thought.

“I thought I had good control over myself at first too,” Shiro says, “ _Months_ after I transformed.  And then, when we were kissing, suddenly, I woke up to myself holding your still body in my hands.  I don’t even remember biting into your neck. ...I thought I had killed you. I really thought I had.”

“You didn’t,” Keith murmurs quietly.

“Keith, I know how important Krolia is to you.  I want to warn her too. But we have to protect you...and we have to protect her, too.  You are the greater threat to her. Not Lotor.”

Keith sinks back to the ground.  “He...he said something about waiting for the blood moon...  After that night, the rain is supposed to sweep more of the lands for a much longer time.  ...Maybe he’ll wait until then.”

“How long until that?”

“Uh...  Weeks? Months?  I don’t know. That’s Pidge’s domain.”

“Sounds like we have some time,” Shiro murmurs softly, still rubbing Keith’s hands soothingly.  “...We will find out when the blood moon is. And then we’ll find a way to alert Krolia, Keith. I promise.  Let’s work on you first.”

Keith looks down at his hands.  His unfamiliar strange hands. He swallows the fight down; it’s harder than he wishes it was.  “You’re right,” he whispers, words raw. He looks to Shiro’s face, open and waiting. “Let’s start now.”

They begin slowly.  Using Shiro as a balance, Keith wobbles up onto his two feet, biting his lip as he concentrates hard.  “Was it this hard for you?” Keith asks.

Shiro shakes his head, trying to mask the confusion on his brow.  “It was weird,” he allows, “but I could still walk.”

Keith frowns into his work.  He doesn’t give up, though. By the end of the night, he is able to walk across the room fairly smoothly without using Shiro as a crutch.

The next night, he’s able to walk without Shiro at all, and that’s when he grabs his knife and his bow and jerks his thumb outside.  “I need to eat.”

Shiro sighs softly.  He needs to as well.

It’s nice to be out in the open night, not closed in by four walls.  The last time he was outside was when he was in that grey swamp, dying over a log.  He shakes the thought out of his memory and holds his head up high, continuing through the forest with Shiro at his side.

He hasn’t changed, he tries to remind himself.  He’s just the same as he’s always been, just living in a different body.  He’s still _him_.

“There’s a deer,” Keith murmurs, holding his hand out for Shiro to slow.

Shiro’s face goes still with fear as he sees it.  Keith knows how he’s been dreading this, no longer having any sort of food source that they won’t have to kill.

“I’ll do it, Keith,” Shiro says softly, getting his own bow ready.

Keith watches through curious eyes.  Shiro’s been so afraid to wield anything, but he seems determined now.

Keith smiles a bit.  “You don’t have to protect me.”

“I’m not.”

“And you don’t have to prove anything, Shiro.”

“If we’re going to do this,” Shiro murmurs, “I need to pull my weight too.”

Keith sees the fire in Shiro’s eyes, so he stays silent, turning to watch the deer, who is walking steadily through.

It’s a beautiful creature.  Keith understands Shiro’s hesitance.  The elegant way that they move, their wide innocent eyes.  There isn’t any mystery to Shiro’s upset.

Shiro takes a deep breath as he pulls back on the bow.  His form is exceptional. His focus steel.

Keith lets his eyes drift from Shiro and over to the deer, and then he stops.

He meets the deer’s gaze.  Its spooked eyes. He feels a familiar tug.

Maybe Shiro doesn’t have to protect Keith.  Maybe Keith can protect Shiro from this instead.

“Wait,” Keith says sharply, placing his hand on Shiro’s arm.  “...Let me try something first.”

Shiro presses his lips together tightly.  Keith can see the frustration on his brow, but also the relief as he lowers his bow.  “You don’t have to protect me.”

“We said we’d try our best,” Keith breathes, taking a step toward the deer slowly, offering his hand out toward it, “for every living creature.”

Shiro frowns after him, asking softly, “what are you doing?”

Keith doesn’t answer.  Shiro’s looked into his eyes many times before, when he was weaker, when he was human, and Keith knows what it feels like to be on the other end.  He didn’t understand how easy it was from the vampire’s end. Anything he wants. Any of his heart’s desire. He feels it pouring from him like heat radiates off skin.  He has the deer in its grasp.

“Come here,” Keith whispers, holding his hand out gently.  The deer doesn’t take its eyes off of him. Slowly, it begins to walk forward, stepping over berry bushes and approaching Keith.

“Hey,” Keith breathes, placing his outstretched hand on its back and brushing gently.  It stands there for him, in his space, leaning into the touch. Keith turns back to Shiro, grinning widely.  He continues running his hand over its back. “ _Look_.  It came to me on its own.”

“I can see that,” Shiro murmurs, a slight divot in his brow as he carefully takes his place beside Keith.  Carefully, he reaches up and pets its neck. “...Though I’m not sure ‘on its own’ is the right phrase. You’re scarily good at that.”

“It’s easy, isn’t it?  When you compelled me?”

“Too easy.  I hardly knew I was doing it.”

“They’re bigger up close,” Keith says, eyes bright with excitement.  He walks around it and looks it in the eyes again, two large black buttons.  He guides it slowly to the ground as it follows his will.

“Jesus, Keith,” Shiro mutters.  “...I don’t know if it’s supposed to be _that_ easy.”

“You try.”

“I have.  I can’t compel animals.”

“Really?”  Keith raises an eyebrow at him.

Shiro shakes his head.  “Maybe you were right about me being a bad vampire,” Shiro chuckles lowly.

“...Well, maybe  you’ll get it soon.”

“Or maybe you’re just an exceptional vampire.”

Keith looks back down, petting behind the deer’s ears.  “Aren’t you glad though? ...We won’t have to kill it this way,” Keith says quietly. “...If we don’t take more than we need.”

Keith kneels beside it, leaning forward and assessing its body, wondering where he should even bite.

Shiro was right.  The thought is absolutely disgusting.  He hasn’t been near humans yet, thank god, but somehow chewing on a neck is the last thing Keith wants to do despite the pain in his throat that’s starting to feel like agony.

“Here,” Shiro says lowly as he takes a seat beside Keith.  “You can feel their blood vessels out. If you try hard enough, you can probably even smell it.  The warmest points, running through. Feel it?”

Keith runs his hands along its neck.  “...I think so.”

“It’s daunting...isn’t it...?”  Shiro says. “I can do it first if you want.”

“It’s fine, Shiro,” Keith says.  “I’ll try it first.” He can hear the waver in Shiro’s voice.  It gives him the strength to be what Shiro needs.

He leans over the deer, hand brushing through the hair of its neck as it breathes evenly, the rise and fall of it meeting Keith’s hand...and, with one last hesitant exhale, Keith bites into it...and he drinks.

It just tastes like blood.  Dirt and iron. But it soothes the pain in his throat and Keith finds himself biting down harder, gripping to it with tight hands.

“...Keith,” Shiro murmurs softly above him.  He feels a hand going down on his shoulder, rubbing over his skin anxiously.

Keith pulls up, breathing hard, eyes closed.  His face is probably a gruesome disaster, but Shiro leans forward, taking in the look on his face.

“...How was it?”  Shiro asks on a breath.

Keith hums, rubbing his fingers over his lips.  They come back red. Seeing the contrast of that color in the pale blue moonlight is a little jarring, but when he swallows, his throat doesn’t hurt.  He lets out a sigh filled with relief, leaning his head onto Shiro’s shoulder. He hadn’t realized how much it’d been bothering it. “...It was good,” he murmurs, almost afraid of the admittance.  He rubs the back of his arm across his face. “It’s better than I thought it’d be...better than it smells.”

They sit there for awhile, Shiro holding Keith in support.  Eventually, Keith nudges Shiro. “You try.”

“Okay,” Shiro whispers.  He looks down at the deer; it still has its eyes open, breathing evenly under Keith’s spell.  Grabbing Keith’s hand, he leans down carefully. He drinks for a short while and comes up with his nose wrinkled.  “Ugh.”

“Ugh?”

“...That tastes nothing like your blood.”

Keith watches his expression, a little worried.  He can’t give Shiro his blood anymore; they have to find a worthy alternative.

But Shiro manages a little smile.  “...It’s not as bad as I thought though.”

“Yeah?  Manageable?”

Shiro nods softly.  “Yeah. Of course. Nothing has to die.  I’m happy.”

Keith hums happily, squeezing Shiro’s hand.  He gives Shiro a peck on the lips and Shiro crinkles his nose again.  “You’re _bloody_.”

Keith chuckles, rubbing at his face some more, noticing how Shiro’s face is perfectly clean.  Shiro sighs and gives in, cleaning up Keith’s face for him with the edge of his sleeve. He watches Keith fondly.  “A _mess_.”

Keith says, “We can’t all be as civilized as you.”

“Mm.”

Keith lets himself be pampered as Shiro goes overboard.  “...I’m going to miss giving you my blood though.”

“Yeah,” Shiro murmurs lowly, leaning in to kiss Keith’s mouth.  “That was really nice, but we’ll find other ways to entertain ourselves.”

Keith chuckles.  He watches as the deer starts coming around, slowly pulling itself to a sitting position.  It looks drunk as it watches them.

And no, it doesn’t taste the best, but it’s honestly better than Keith had thought.  And Shiro’s happy, so that’s what counts.

Keith’s happy too.  He had been scared, at first, but now he sees beyond the panic for what this situation truly is: they’re alive.  They’re together. And the bell tower, peaking high into the sky, is gorgeous as the moon curves around it.

“I want to see the ocean together,” Keith says excitedly, climbing up the side of the bell tower and ignoring Shiro’s protests about how dangerous it is.  “Climb the stairs then, you chicken,” Keith chuckles, watching down below as Shiro rolls his eyes, considers the stairs, and then follows Keith up the side.

Keith grins down at him and pulls himself onto the top of the tower, above where the bell hangs, rusted still.  Above the treetops, the ocean’s horizon lies. The moon sits above. Beautiful.

Shiro’s grabbing onto the edge and heaves himself over it in no time, frowning at Keith slightly.

“Hey, old man,” Keith chuckles.

“I’m not old,” Shiro protests.  “I’m still in my twenties.”

Keith snorts, bumping his toe against Shiro’s as they lay out together.  “Old soul.”

“I’ll give you that one,” Shiro says, slipping an arm over Keith’s shoulders.

The ocean lays out before them, cutting clear overhead the forests.  Keith thinks he can make out the lighthouse in the far distance, but the fog is everywhere tonight, a cover of soft clouds over their home.

“...Does it look like the lighthouse is on?”  Keith squints.

Shiro considers it, tilting his head.  “Hmm. It sort of does, doesn’t it? I don’t know what else it’d be.”

“But it hasn’t worked for ages,” Keith murmurs.  “Can’t be.”

“Maybe it’s the moon.”

“Maybe...”

But the moon is high in the sky, safely above the fog’s cover.  It’s soft and beautiful. The same sky. He wonders if Krolia sees it.

Shiro shifts, looking Keith over.  “...How do you feel? Does anything hurt?”

Keith lifts his hand to his neck, where he can still remember the vampire’s teeth piercing through.  He presses his hand to his chest, pulling the shirt away to look at the skin. He can see two scars, little stars bursting on his flesh, but they’re healed.  “No, it’s fine.”

“Good,” Shiro says quietly.  “I’m glad. Did you drink enough blood?  I’m sorry I stopped you. I was worried you’d lost it for a second.”

“Yeah,” Keith whispers, running his finger over his lip subconsciously again.  “I might’ve... It’s hard to stop... How did you endure this for so long? The pain was worse than I thought it’d be.”

“It did hurt,” Shiro murmurs.  “...But it somehow seemed better than the alternative, which was your blood.  And at the time, that scared me like nothing else.”

Keith doesn’t think he would’ve been able to have that kind of restraint.  It’s only been days since Keith turned and the pain was enough to drive him crazy.  A bit more and he could see himself losing sense and doing anything to douse the pain.

But Shiro...  It had been so long for him and he held so strong.  Shiro’s goodness just _overflows_ from him.  There, sitting together in the moonlight, he truly looks like an angel, lit up like the stars, looking out toward the ocean gently.  When he senses Keith looking at him, he turns his eyes down, smiling warmly for him.

They stare at the ocean together.  “...Thanks for staying by my side, Shiro.  Thanks for saving me.”

“Of course, Keith...  And thank you, as well.”

“I still want to do it,” Keith says.  “Somehow. Someday. I want us to be a team.  Help others. You and me. Nothing has to change because of this.”

“Okay,” Shiro hums, leaning his head down over Keith’s.  “Okay.”

 

Shiro was right.  It doesn’t take long to adapt.  It’s only been a few days, but Keith wakes up one night feeling antsy and anxious and _ready_.  “...I need to see Krolia,” he says into the air around them.

Shiro turns his attention away from his book and up to Keith, leaning his head on his hand.

Keith frowns into the lantern’s light.  “Maybe I’ll write her a note. Maybe I’ll...figure out how to leave her some sort of message she’ll understand.  I _cannot_ let Lotor hurt her.  I’ve wasted enough time as it is.  Who knows if he’ll actually wait for the blood moon.  I can’t trust him, not even the plans he makes.”

“...The risks, Keith...”

“I’ll avoid her,” Keith says quietly.

“Keith -”

“I can’t let her die.”  Keith looks to Shiro. “Or you.  You’re both so important to me. You’ve become my family...but she was my family too and I can’t just forget her.  I don’t care if she’ll kill me... I’ve got to try.” Keith pushes his way out of the tent and starts getting ready.

Shiro closes his book, thinking hard into it.  “...Take me with you then.”

Keith sighs.  “You’ll get in the way.”

“Every time you leave, it’s _me_ who has to find you beaten up and bloodied.  Last time, you were _dying_.  Do you have any idea what that was like to see?”

Keith tugs at the string on his boots hard.  “...I’m stronger now.”

“And more scared.”

“I won’t approach her.  I’ll write a note right now.  Send an arrow through her window when she’s not home and then I’ll leave.  Foolproof. I won’t go near any of the Blades. I’ll come straight back afterward so you won’t worry.  Deal?”

Shiro still looks worried.

“I’ll be in and out,” Keith says.

Shiro sighs heavily.  “...Okay. In and out.”

“I’ll be careful,” Keith whispers.  “Nothing’s going to happen to me.”

Keith grabs some ink and parchment from their bag and sets it out in front of him.  He writes the letter out carefully, in his script that he knows she’ll recognize.

 

_Krolia,_

_I’m sure Kolivan’s told you everything he knows.  He doesn’t know everything. Shiro is a vampire, yes, but he’s also a good man.  I know you won’t understand, so I have to stay away. I didn’t want this._

_I miss you all but keeping Shiro safe is my top priority.  I can’t let you hurt him. I wasn’t going to contact you at all, but new things have come to light._

_Lotor thinks you’re part of some grand scheme to keep the sacrifice away from him.  He thinks it’s your son, whom he believes to still be alive. He thinks the reason why I’m gone is because I’m hiding him._

_I had a very dangerous run-in with Lotor in which he thought I wouldn’t make it and he was running his stupid mouth to me.  He said enough where I think killing you is an option truly in his cards._

_This isn’t a joke.  I wish it was. Please, Krolia.  I know you won’t listen to me about Shiro.  But I wouldn’t lie about Lotor. I have nothing to gain from that.  He was serious. He tried to kill me and I’m scared you’re next. He mentioned he wants to wrap everything up in time for the blood moon._

_Take care of yourself.  Everyone needs you._

 

He hesitates as he stares down at the blank end of the paper.  He dips his quill in the inkwell and just does it.

 

 _I miss you_ _a lot._

_Keith_

 

Keith stares at the parting message, considers crossing it out, but folds the letter before he gives himself the chance.  He checks the sky to see how much night he has left. It should be enough.

“You want to know something strange?”  Shiro murmurs, eyes screwed up in concentration.

“Hmm?”

“When I found you in the swamp, I came across a group of men leaving the place.”

“That’s not strange at all.  It was probably Lotor’s men. No one else would be all the way out there besides them.”

“...One of them looked familiar.”

Keith looks up from sealing the note.  He frowns. “Like he lived in the village or something?”

Shiro shakes his head slowly as he thinks.  “I can’t remember. But I know I’ve seen him before.”

“Well...let me know if you remember.  But they have no reason to hide like vampires do.  I’d bet they basically lived in the bars. Maybe one of them drank too much and got himself hurt and they had to call you in to save his sorry butt.”

“Maybe.  I did see a lot of cases like that.”

Keith snorts.  “Stay here,” he says.

Shiro sighs.  “This feels like a bad idea.”

Keith leans down and kisses him.  “You worry too much. I’ll be back before you finish this chapter.”

“There are only twenty pages left.”

“Then I’d better be quick.”

“This is stupid,” Shiro mutters.  “I don’t like it.”

“You know what’s stupid?”  Keith tilts his head and smiles, tapping the wall of their room.  “Two vampires living in a temple made specifically for eradicating vampires.”  Keith grins crookedly down at him. “But I think we’re so stupid that we’re a little bit brilliant.”

“I don’t think it actually works that way,” Shiro says, his worried look parting for a soft chuckle beneath Keith’s hands.

Keith leans down to kiss Shiro fondly on the mouth again.  “We can be so stupid that we’re just blissfully ignorant.”

Shiro rolls to the side so he can meet Keith’s kiss halfway, slowly reaching for Keith.  “Hmm. Maybe that’s the ticket.”

“No vampire war,” Keith hums.

“No vampire talk _at all_.”

“No Lotor.”

“No finding you hurt.”  Shiro murmurs, trying to tug Keith down with him.

“...But we can’t really live like that.  I’ve got to go,” Keith says. He stands up tall and, with one last wave, begins to walk out of the room.  He stops before he exits, hand on the door. “I just thought of something. ...How did you find me, by the way?”

“Uh...”  Shiro rubs at his nose.

“Both times.  I was careful not to leave tracks that first time and the second time, I was in the swamp.  There were no tracks at all.”

“Well, your nose is better as a vampire, right?”

“Yeah.  I can smell the jasmine from across the courtyard.”

“Well, I can smell you from even further.”  Shiro purses his lips in embarrassment. “...It was strong in your room at the lighthouse, but then I got a taste of your blood and...it’s become easy to track you.”

“Huh,” Keith says with interest.  He hangs off the door and leans down into Shiro’s space.  “You just smell like...you. Do I still smell? Without the blood?”

Shiro nods slowly, watching his face for a reaction.

“...Huh.”  He sniffs Shiro again and shrugs.  “Maybe it’ll come to me.”

Shiro smiles crookedly and grabs onto Keith’s hands.  “It doesn’t bother you?”

“Why would it?  I let you drink my blood, why wouldn’t I let you breathe in my scent?”  He flicks Shiro on the nose playfully. “Okay. I’m leaving for real. Stop trying to distract me.  I know your game.”

Shiro laughs, groaning as Keith slips his hands from Shiro’s.

“I’ll be right back, _I swear_.  In and out, right?”

“Right...”  Shiro sighs, but there’s still worry on his face.  “I trust you.”

Keith kisses him one last time for good measure, long and hard.  “And when I get back, we can continue this.”

“Okay,” Shiro breathes.

Keith is careful through the forests.  He keeps his ears open and his eyes closed.  It’s easier that way. Shiro’s a fast learner.  He’ll make a good partner very soon, but if Krolia is Keith’s enemy, he has to make sure he’s got every advantage he can have.

He avoids the manor.  He knows he probably shouldn’t, but he turns his focus up the hill, on the cliffside, where the lighthouse stands tall.  He wants to do something for Shiro. He loved the way Shiro’s face would light up excitedly as he dug through the cupboards and concocted his special potions.  Their supply now is limited, but it doesn’t have to be. It’ll just be really quick.

The lighthouse’s light _is_ on, Keith realizes.  He hesitates for only a second.  Must be Pidge, he thinks uneasily.  She probably put it on earlier, but he can see how there’s a soft light coming from her room now.  A small candle, for reading probably.

So it’s probably safe.  Up on the hill, lonely like it always is, the lighthouse looks like it’s calling out for him.  Keith bites his lip and shoves down the feeling he feels bubbling in the bottom of his gut.

Forgoing the front door, Keith jams his claws into the side of the stone, scaling the side.  It’s really not as easy as he had hoped. The lighthouse is old and the stone is uneven and he’s still not totally used to the way he sits in his bones.  They feel distant almost. He’s not as in tune with them.

But he makes it to the window, peering inside carefully.  Everything looks just as he left it. It’s as messy and cluttered as ever.

He fiddles with the window and, being as old as it is, pops open beneath pressure.  Keith swings it open and peers inside, checking for any suspicious movement, but there are no candles lit, no movement.

Deeming it safe, Keith leaps over the edge, quietly sneaks across the floor just in case, keeping a careful eye out.  He goes to the books, setting them carefully on the bottom of his bag. He gathers his favorites - medical, history, fantasy.  Then he goes for the alchemy set and begins taking the dried herbs, wrapping them, and shoving them in his bag carefully. He gets his favorite clothes and crams it in his bag too.  He misses them. He misses all of this.

Keith wants his decorative vines along the top of his room too.  He misses them more than he’d like to admit and it reminds him of his friends, so he’s just going to take them.  He wants the candelabra Kolivan had let him take from the manor one year too. It lights up a space like nothing else and he’s tired of living in darkness like some kind of beast.  Even though he can see better now than when he was human, it still irks him. Deprives him of a comfort he stubbornly wants to cling to.

No one will notice if he takes these things.  No one probably even thinks to come here. ...Beyond the light of course.  Maybe that’s something completely unrelated.

Carefully, he pulls the curtain back in search of those things, confident in his choice.

And sees, sleeping in his bed...

...Krolia.

She’s totally out, her head tilted back on his pillow, her hands clinging tightly to his blanket.

He stares, framed in the doorway, stock still, stunned.

It’s just...her.  Asleep. In his _bed_.

His reflex is to shake her awake and ask her, carefully, _what the fuck_?

But he remembers himself.  He can never speak with her again.

She smells like alcohol.  Reeks of it. Which is...a totally un-Krolia sort of mannerism.

This is dangerous.  This is staring death right in the face, given reprieve, and stupidly continuing to stare into it.

But still, he can’t move.

What is she doing here...?  Setting a trap and waiting for him?  Keith doesn’t understand.

But the empty alcohol bottles by her hand.  The way she’s curling in his blankets like...like...

She misses him.

Like a mother might do when she mourns her dead child.

Someone trying to keep the last bits of him close because there’s nothing else left.

Keith’s heart tugs.  He allows himself to hope that’s what it means.

He takes one step forward, hand outstretched.   _I’m here_ , he wants to say, wants to ease the sorrow hanging over her.

...And then he thinks of Shiro.

Shiro, waiting back at their hideout.  Shiro, afraid something will happen to him - Keith, the vampire.

 _Liars,_ Krolia’s voice hisses through his mind and he remembers her leaning over him as he was dying...knife in her hand, at the ready.

 _You’d kill us all?_  Keith had asked before.   _Even me?_

She hadn’t even hesitated, not bothering to look up from sharpening her blade: _even you_.

He can’t take this risk.  He looks up at the vines and the candelabra and then lets the curtain fall.  He slips out the window and away.

His head’s a mess.  Never in a million years did he think he’d see that.  Her. There. In his bed.

Why?  ...Why?

He walks alongside the manor, attaches his note to an arrow, and pulls the string back.  Sends it flying into her room.

Will she even go there?  Or does she just stay in his room now...?  How much has he missed?

It must’ve been a trap and he just got lucky.  ...That’s got to be it. It’s not because...whatever idea his mind is trying to entertain.

Family.  Krolia’s never needed it, not from Keith.  It’s just Keith who’s been foolish enough to hope.

He hears the arrow thunk and hit the floor, but he’s unhappy.  Something in his chest feels hollow and unsure. He looks back up to the lighthouse, at that lonely light that’s calling out.  ...Keith wonders.

He takes a few steps back and sits on the rock behind him, watching that light, secretly hoping he’ll see her pushing through the front door, walking to the manor.

God, he misses her so much.  He misses all of them. They’re so close, just right here, he can smell the familiar scent of home pouring from their open windows.  He wants nothing more than to crawl in and wake Pidge. Ask about what’s been going on in their lives. How they’re doing. If they’re okay with him gone.

Minutes pass and Keith still just sits there.  An hour. He knows he’s got to go, but his feet are rooted here.  This is his home... Even if he doesn’t belong here, he just...

He jumps as he sees a small figure atop the lighthouse.  It must be Krolia.

The beacon hasn’t been lit in years.  Keith had been shit at upkeeping stuff like that, was foolishly too caught up on ‘what matters’.  He hasn’t seen that light in forever.

But now, it’s blazing with life - a star up on that hill.  It’s calling out, seeking something. It feels like a message sent directly to him.

She used to help him light it when he was younger, a night light, she had said.  And Keith’s face crumples.

He misses her.  He wants to come home.  He wants to bring Shiro back here and introduce him to Krolia.  Get her approval. He wants to stay.

But he is literally her worst nightmare.  How many times has Keith dreamt through the years that one of the Blades would turn and he’d have to kill them?  It’s been everyone’s secret fear. He can’t do that to Krolia, not to any of them.

But still, he sits here, unable to move.

He starts as he sees something pasty move in Krolia’s window.

It’s Pidge.

She doesn’t have her glasses on, but she’s leaning forward out the window, squinting.

“Hey!”  She calls.  “Who’s there?!  I can see you!”

Keith startles, tripping backwards.  He almost opens his mouth to say something.   _Almost_.  But he remembers what he told her to do if she ever saw him as a vampire.  He told her to kill him.

 _Pidge_ , he wants to call.  He wants to run back inside and scoop her up in his arms and hold her and tell her, _I did have a family.  It was you all along._  Instead, he turns.  He runs, heart tearing out of his chest.

 

He basically falls to his knees in front of Shiro as Shiro turns to greet him.  He doesn’t listen to what Shiro is saying in a pleasant conversational tone. He doesn’t say anything back.  Keith just leans forward, grabs Shiro roughly by the collar of his shirt, and kisses him.

No prelude.  No gentle press of the lips like Shiro seems to like - that easing into it.  There’s no time for that tonight. Keith’s heart is burning now, in flames, a home steadily burning down.  He’s desperate to turn away. His hands grab into Shiro's pants, who makes a small noise of surprise in the back of his throat.

“Keith,” Shiro breathes, trying to hold him by the shoulders.  “Keith, what’s wrong?”

“Can I not just kiss you?”  Keith breathes out a puff of air.

“Of course you can,” Shiro whispers back.  “...But this is...”

“It’s what?”  Keith cuts out sharply.

“...Are you okay?”  He asks gently.

Keith bites at his lip, still straddling Shiro’s lap, his hand still in Shiro’s pants.  He gives one curt nod. “I’m not hurt,” he allows.

“Keith...”  Shiro whispers.  He doesn’t protest when Keith dips down again, pressing deeply into his mouth and moving his hand.

Keith wants to say that it’s different being close to someone else like this, but the base of it all is the same.  A being with wants, just carved a little deeper, sunken a bit more into his unbeating heart.

They make love that night because what else would it be?  What else could get Keith to give up everything else he ever wanted and not feel regret?

Keith is rough.  He makes Shiro pant and cry out his name and squirm beneath him and Keith still can’t slow his pace.

“ _You’re mine_ ,” Keith growls and it almost scares him because he feels bitter and dark, torn up and unlike himself and he’s taking it out on _Shiro_ of all people.

But Shiro just breathes out puffs of soft breath, “of course I am, Keith,” he assures him, reaching up and resting his hands on Keith’s face.  “Of course I am...”

Keith is on fire, burning to bits through the atmosphere, and what was blazing and full of fury only moments before, suddenly crumbles and breaks beneath the tenderness that is Shiro.  Keith’s anger washes clean out of him and then he's crying, sinking into Shiro’s embrace, who adapts with the change of pace easily, as if he’d expected it, and he curls his body around him gently to protect him.

He’s a storm, out of control and hurt.  Shiro weathers it. Calms it beneath his fingers as he brushes through Keith’s hair.

As evening the next day fades to night, Keith wakes to see Shiro already awake beside him, watching Keith.

“You okay?”  Shiro whispers as they lay over the blankets together.

Keith rubs at his face tiredly, shifting his head so that he fits more comfortably into the crook of Shiro’s neck.  “...Yeah. I’m okay... I just...overestimated how much I was over them.” He pushes himself up onto his elbow to watch Shiro’s face carefully.  Shiro stares back up at him, as peaceful and calm as ever, eyes steady in any storm. “Are _you_ okay?  I’m sorry about earlier...  I...I wasn’t feeling like myself.  But it’s no excuse.”

“You didn’t hurt me,” Shiro murmurs, brushing a strand of Keith’s hair back.  “I was just worried about you.”

Keith runs his fingers over his mouth, thinking.  “I’m okay,” he says again. He hopes the more he says it, the more it’ll feel true in his heart.  His gut still feels hollow.

“How did it go...?” Shiro asks hesitantly.

Keith doesn’t want to talk about that yet, so he doesn’t.

“...I got you something,” Keith hums, pulling himself up.  He reaches over for his bag and starts taking out all the goodies he brought in.  “Since you liked doing your alchemy thing. Thought I might as well.”

Shiro stops, looking down at all the herbs in horror.  “...You went in the lighthouse.”

Keith carefully avoids his eyes as he keeps unpacking.  “I thought since I was already there -”

“Keith, they could’ve been waiting for you!”

Keith is quiet for a moment, shifting the sheets off his skin.  He’s still naked and somehow arguing without any clothes on feels much more visceral.  He sighs again. “...Krolia was there.”

Shiro just stares.

“I’m okay, alright?  She was asleep. Passed out more like.  Drunk. The whole place reeked.”

“...Drunk?  Krolia?”

“Yeah.  Right in my bed; she didn’t even stir.  ...It’s so unlike her. I dunno if I ever saw her drink once, not even when she was upset over her family.”

“...Keith, that doesn’t change the fact that you said you’d be careful.  That was a huge risk. I appreciate the thought, really, I do, but next time, please think before you do something like this.  None of this is worth your life. What if she had been awake? What if she had seen you?”

“I know...  I... You should’ve come,” Keith mutters lowly.  “I forgot that I...sort of love these people.”

Shiro watches him for awhile.  With a sigh, he scoots closer to Keith and gathers him in his arms.  “...Come here. I’ll give you a pass this time. But this time _only_ .  Next time, _let me go with you_.”

Keith nods.  “Definitely. You’re coming.  I want you right beside me the entire time.”

“Okay, good.”

“Also...  One last thing,” Keith murmurs, looking down guiltily.  “Pidge saw me.”

Shiro chokes.  “What?”

“She didn’t have her glasses on though, so...it should be fine.”

“Should be?”  Shiro sighs, rubbing at his forehead.  “...Keith.”

“I know, I know.  It was a mess. Next time, you’ll come.”

Shiro heaves a sigh.  He lays back out. “You got the note to her at least?”

“It made it into her room.  ...If I hadn’t been so shocked, the smarter thing would’ve been to just toss it on her drunk body.”

Shiro chuckles.  “Mm. Yeah. That would’ve gotten to her a bit faster.”

Keith sighs heavily, curling up into Shiro’s side again.  “...I miss them, Shiro.”

“I know, Keith,” Shiro whispers, running his hands through his hair.

Keith loves the feel of it.  It almost helps the ache in his chest that has been growing since their confrontation with Kolivan, that’s just been torn open even wider tonight.  He leans into Shiro’s hands slightly, closing his eyes and humming. “...Do you miss your family too?”

Gently, Shiro says, “Everyday, Keith.  But I have you and that makes me happier than I could’ve ever imagined.  There’s so much loss in this world. I never expected to be found.”

“...Found,” Keith whispers.  He wishes day were approaching.  He doesn’t want to be awake anymore.  He wants to go under. “...I’m so glad you’re here, Shiro,” he murmurs his one last truth.  He still hurts.

 

The next night, Keith wakes up feeling groggy and low.  He’s alone in their tent together, but the lantern is on.  He sniffs, pushing out of the tent flaps.

He blinks when he sees Shiro dressed in an outfit he’s never seen, holding a small decorative lantern.

“Hey,” Shiro grins warmly at him, turning fully for Keith to see.  He has a rabbit mask pushed up on the top of his head.

Keith stares.  “...What are you doing?”

“There’s a festival going on tonight,” Shiro hums, walking over to their decrepit table and holding up special garb for Keith.  “I was thinking there’s nothing stopping us. Might be fun to go.”

“Festival?”  Keith blinks.  He walks beside Shiro and looks down at the outfit.  The cotton is soft, finely crafted. It looks like just his size.  He runs his hands over the folds uncertainly. “...How did you get this...?”

“Mm...I might’ve...done something a little stupid myself tonight.”

Keith frowns at him.

“You’ve done _how many_ dumb things lately?  I think I deserve just one.  I had some money saved up at my house,” Shiro says.  “My family and I used to go to this festival every year.  It was important to us. It’s about honoring our loved ones, no matter the masks we wear.  I thought it’d be nice for us to go together.” He flicks the rabbit mask over his face and then reaches over to the desk again, grabbing a fox mask and reaching around Keith’s head, who ducks his head forward slightly so Shiro can have better access.  Shiro secures it and hums warmly. “It might seem like we wouldn’t be a good match, right? But we are. So we honor our differences and give thanks for each other.”

Keith pulls the mask up, smiling softly.  “...That’s a nice thought.”

“And plus, with the masks, no one will be able to recognize us.”

Keith realizes he’s right and he grins even wider.  “This garb covers us pretty well too. You look really nice.”  He starts to slip out of his clothes and trade it out for the outfit Shiro got him.

Shiro’s returning smile is brilliant.  “...I was just thinking it might be a nice change of pace.  I’m glad you agree.”

“I’ve never been to a festival,” Keith says.  “Not like this. I’ve always wanted to though.  Maybe I should hunt first,” he murmurs. “If there’ll be people all around.”

“Wouldn’t be too bad of an idea.  You know, I’m not really sure what we’ll do there since what I _used_ to do was just eat all the desserts with my sister.”

Keith laughs.  “Did your parents spoil you?”

“Quite a bit, yeah.”

Keith laughs again.  “Good. You deserved it.  I’m sure we’ll find something to do.”  He holds his arms up and flicks his mask down.  “How do I look?”

Shiro pulls his own rabbit mask down and presses their noses together.  “...Beautiful.”

“You too, Shiro.”

Night is usually quiet.  It feels a lot like living alone on this planet, just the two of them, isolated from everyone else.  Some nights it hurts more than others. Tonight, it doesn’t hurt at all.

Tonight, the town is strung up with tiny lanterns, warm like glittering gold.  Keith feels like the stars have come for a visit and they’re allowed to open a window for them, let them in through their defenses to lighten their souls.  The rest of the town rests beneath this warm light, alight with life and spirit. Keith’s heart fills with joy as he grips Shiro’s hand tightly and pulls the forward, down the hill faster, eager to get to the sparkling land below.

“ _Wow_ ,” Keith breathes, as they pass beneath the gates that are all done up in flowers and decorations made of weaved vines and grass.  Keith’s basically bouncing on the tips of his toes. “ _Oh_ , I’ve always wanted to go to something like this!”  He’s vibrating with happiness. “I think I almost convinced Krolia once, but she chickened out at the last minute.  Oh, this is _so_ _great_!”

Shiro laughs.  “Who knew you turned into a little kid at festivals?”

Keith guides Shiro around, zig zagging through the excitement, looking around at the booths set up with people selling decadent desserts and sparkling trinkets.  Keith leans over them like a child, eyes glowing with light. “This is amazing!”

The merchants laugh at his enthusiasm, infected with the night’s joy.  “Welcome, welcome,” they say to him. And though Keith knows it’s just to sell shit, he still loves to hear the happiness in their voices directed at him.

The streets are filled with people and booths.  They line all the way through to the end of the town, the entire place filled with gold, alight with music and the sound of merry chatter.  There are so many people, everyone with masks on their faces, bundled in groups with their families and friends. Their hands grip tightly to the ones they love and they chirp and laugh happily together.

Keith’s chest feels so filled with warmth as he laces his and Shiro’s hands together even tighter, smiling up at him even though he knows Shiro can’t see his face through the mask.

“Look,” Shiro says, voice warm.  He leads Keith over to a booth of hand carved figures.

Keith sees a wolf and is immediately drawn in.  It reminds him of the one he has set on the windowsill of his lighthouse that a child he’d saved had given him.  This one has a little hat and he laughs at it. “This is adorable,” he says, looking up to the artist. “I love all the detail.  I can see the care in it.”

Keith blinks when he sees Shiro and the man exchanging the items in their hands.

“Thank you, young man,” the artist grins merrily at him.

“We’ll take that one too,” Shiro says, trading in more coins.

“Thank you,” Keith murmurs, stunned a little bit when the man pokes the little carving closer to Keith so he can grab it.

They walk off and Shiro looks down at the wolf, a smile in his voice.  “Looks familiar,” he chuckles.

“That’s why I like it.  Thank you, Shiro. You didn’t have to waste your money on me.”

“It’s not a waste.  That’s why I brought it.”

Keith arches his neck around Shiro to see what’s in his hand.  “What’d you get?”

“My favorite person in the world,” he says, holding the tiny figure up.

It’s Keith.  The little figure is standing proud and tall in his Blade of Marmora gear, looking every bit a superhero.  There’s even his knife in his hand.

Keith barks out a laugh of surprise.  “ _What?_  Is that _me_?”

“I told you people love you.  You’re famous. They always have little figures of you every year.  You didn’t know?”

Keith takes it from Shiro’s hands and laughs again because _the detail_.  “What the hell?”  Keith chuckles. “This is amazing.”

“Mmhmm.  Hands off, though, it’s mine.”

“What?!”

“I need to complete my collection.”

“But it’s _literally me_ !”  Keith laughs.  “You can have me _right now_.”

Shiro chuckles.  “In front of all these people?  That might be a little much.”

“ _Stop_ ,” Keith cracks up, elbowing Shiro in the ribs gently, but he keeps his hand still tightly wound in his.  “You know I didn’t mean it like that. Well, I mean, you could, but that’s not what I meant.” He hands the figure over.  “I can’t believe they’re selling little figures of me. Do they have any of the other Blades?”

“You’ll usually see a few of everyone.  You’re the star though.”

“God.  Why?”

“There are a lot of reasons.  I think it helps that you have the face and body of a god.”

Keith chokes and Shiro just laughs again.

“Oh, god,” Shiro murmurs as they pass a dessert table.  “What do you think would happen if I ate human food? I used to eat those crepes every year.”

“We can roll a mouse up in it instead of the ice cream.”

“I hate you sometimes.  I really hate you.”

“No, you don’t,” Keith chuckles, looking over Shiro’s shoulder at the crepes.  “They do look like a good choice though.”

“Let’s go before I cry.”

Keith is chuckling to himself, having way too much fun just being out in this sort of atmosphere.  It’s been so long, he doesn’t really get what he used to hate people for because now, it’s so nice to see them all.  Everyone’s happy, enjoying themselves, enjoying their family. The small children holding onto their parents’ hands are giggling without a care in the world and Keith finds he’s not bitter at all.  He just tightens his hold on Shiro’s hand and smiles up at him, and though Keith can’t see Shiro’s face, he knows that Shiro is smiling down at him too.

They continue walking down the dirt path, looking at all the booths, when he sees a merchant selling flowers stop what she’s doing mid-action.  She stares, flowers falling from her hands. “...Keith Kogane?” she murmurs.

Keith’s head whips around in surprise.  He hadn’t expected anyone to pick him out in the crowd, with a mask, bundled in these look robes.  He doesn’t even recognize her, just a random townsperson.

She’s staring expectantly.  His hesitance is attracting attention.

Shiro steps forward, waving his hand.  “No, no, he doesn’t live around here. He’s just visiting.”

People are looking over.

The lady tilts her head and then her smile turns kind, knowing.  “My mistake,” she says sweetly, giving him a little wink. She reaches down into her basket of dried flower sprigs and hands a large batch over to Keith.  “Here,” she says. “For your loved ones.”

Keith takes them in his arms.  “Thank you,” he says, letting himself be pulled away by Shiro.

“I’m sorry, Keith,” Shiro murmurs.  “Maybe we should go. I honestly didn’t think anyone would recognize you.”

“Hmm...I’m not ready to go yet.  The bell tower,” Keith says, pointing.  “Let’s go there. I want to stay here awhile longer.”

Shiro follows where Keith is pointing and nods slowly.  “Okay. ...You like to climb, don’t you? You and your bell towers.”

“I like high places, what can I say?  You can see everything from up above.”  Keith runs to the base masked in shadows, and pats it.

“We could take the stairs,” Shiro remarks, holding his hand out toward it.

“We could,” Keith calls down below, “but where’s the fun in that?”

He can hear Shiro’s weary chuckle.  They make it up in no time, closer to their friend, the moon, looking down at the town as they lay up in the stars.

“God,” Keith breathes, eyes full of all the gold down below.  “...Beautiful.”

“Mm.  It looks different from up here.  It’s quiet.”

Keith shifts his bag from his shoulder and dumps it beside them.  He takes the flowers out, looking down at them. “What are these for?  She handed them to me with a strange twinkle in her eye; like they had more meaning than _just_ a flower.”

“I keep forgetting you don’t know,” Shiro says, grabbing a flower from the pile and booping it on Keith’s nose.  Keith grins and swats it away. “Each one is an individual wish. You’re supposed to give them each of your loved ones.  It’s supposed to give them long and happy lives.”

“I like that,” Keith mutters.  He picks one up between his fingers and twirls it.  Its pink petals catch the golden light from below and it looks magical as he spins it, like its made of fairy dust.

“The fact that she gave you a big bundle like this says something.  The more people give you, the more loved you supposedly are. It means she thinks you’re very loved.”

Keith grins as he flicks his eyes up to Shiro’s soft expression.  He’s smiling; he’s always smiling, staring at Keith like he means the world.  Keith’s heart flutters and so he pushes all of the flowers onto Shiro’s lap. “They’re for you then.  From me.”

“No, no, no,” Shiro laughs, pushing them back.  “You’re cheating. One per person!”

“Here, then.”  Keith holds one out for him with regal flourish, shoving it up at Shiro’s face.  He spins it between his fingers. “...For you.”

Shiro’s smile softens, swinging his legs happily over the edge of the bell tower’s roof as he looks down at the flower in his hands.  “Thank you, Keith... You know, back in the day, I’d get so many of these.”

“Oh, yeah?”  Keith laughs, arching an eyebrow at him.  “I’m not surprised.”

Shiro had meant it as a tease, but he finds himself startled by what Keith says.  “You’re not?”

“ _No_ ,” Keith chuckles, reaching of with one hand to grab Shiro’s cheek.  “You’re the brightest, softest, kindest, most _beautiful_ person I’ve ever met.  Funny and wise and brave too.  You’re everything anyone could ever want into one soft compassionate being.  I’d bet you got so many flowers on this day that you had to throw some out.”

“No,” Shiro laughs, holding onto his gut because of how funny he finds it.  “I’d never do that.”

“Well, no, of course not.  Not you. You’d just gather them into a corner of your house.  Use them as a bed.”

“A pillow of flowers,” Shiro hums, chuckling under his bed.  “Why didn’t we think of that before the cot? That night you were freezing?”

“Aesthetically pleasing, of course, until you roll over onto a rose with all its thorns.”

“Ouch.”

“Yeah, no kidding.”

Shiro still has laughter pressed to his face.  “You know something...? I think this is the most beautiful flower I’ve ever received.”

A soft silence falls over them.  Keith feels embarrassed somehow. Even though he knows every bit of Shiro, has felt every dip of his flesh, every curve, every crevice, he’s embarrassed by this.

“...Thank the old woman in the market.”

Shiro burst out laughing.  “...Thank you, Keith,” he says lowly.  “You make all my nights bright.”

They smile at each other sitting on the edge of the bell tower, so much fondness and love in both of their eyes.

There’s a sudden commotion down below.  People yelling. Keith thinks it’s some sort of fight breaking out - old habits die hard and all that, but Shiro smiles down eagerly.

“...They’re singing,” he says, excitement brightening his eyes.  “It’s time. They’re going to release the lanterns.”

“Lanterns?”

“For the ones who have died...  In hopes they’ll see the light from heaven.”

“Oh,” Keith whispers, that familiar tug of regret in his gut.

As Keith looks down through the crowd, he can see them - warm golden lanterns beginning to be lit in mass down below.  Their light blazes within them, soft but powerful.

He can hear the townspeople counting down together.  Three...two...one... And, in unison, they’re set free into the wind.  They lift in the air, a gentle breath, away from the ground and filling up the empty night sky with their warmth.  There are hundreds of them, floating by so closely to Keith and Shiro that they could lean off the roof and reach their hands out to catch them.

“...Beautiful,” Keith whispers for the umpteenth time.  He’s stunned breathless, pushing himself to his feet, reaching his hands up into the sky just to feel like part of the beauty all around them.

He looks back to Shiro, eyes wide and full of this sight, to see Shiro’s eyes reflecting all the emotion in his own.  Shiro looks down to him and smiles gently. Keith takes a step clower and grabs Shiro’s hand in his, leaning his head on his shoulder.  They’re both bathing in honey gold light from the lanterns. Keith can feel the warmth on his skin, wrapping around them soundly. Keith reaches a hand up toward them, watching his skin shimmer with light and life.  “Shiro. I’ve never seen anything like this.”

Shiro holds his hand up besides Keith’s.  “We used to light them for everyone who had changed us, who had given us a reason to feel warm, to feel home.  Our relatives... Our friends... They didn’t have to be related by blood to be special to us, to be part of our hearts as family.”  He looks down at Keith gently. “I think your heart already knows that.”

Keith meets his look with a smile.  The bundle of flowers remain spread at their feet, but Shiro still holds the one Keith gave him in his hand.  Keith leans down to grab one from the ground and then stands on the tips of his toes, leaning up to thread it over Shiro’s ear.  Shiro looks more beautiful than any sight Keith’s ever seen. Lit up like the gods, his smile even more radiant than the heaven that’s around them.  “...I think I’ve been a fool all along.”

“Not a fool,” Shiro says softly, placing his own flower over Keith’s ear and humming contentedly as he looks Keith over.  He presses a small kiss to Keith’s cheek and murmurs lowly, “Just on a journey.”

“I got a little lost along the way.  But I’m here now,” he sighs happily, his eyes turn to follow the last of the lanterns that trail behind the masses of them, floating among the stars now.  “Shiro...? Do you think the lanterns reach their loved ones? Do you think they can see from...wherever they are...?”

“I think they do,” Shiro whispers.

Keith hums, breathing the moment in soft even breaths.

“Keith,” Shiro whispers.  “Can I say something?”

Keith turns up.  “Of course.” He gives Shiro’s hand a little squeeze as he sees the apprehension buzzing in his eyes.

“I’ve been wanting to say it for a long time now...  Something you mentioned before that I...I’m not sure you meant to say, but that’s not the point.  The point is... My last partner, we knew each other for almost two decades, side-by-side. I loved him.  I did. We knew everything about each other but...even still...we didn’t have half the connection that you and I have.  I should’ve said this sooner, but I’ve been afraid of spooking you. I know sometimes I say truths too soon that scare you.  But... I...” He shakes himself, groaning softly. His brow is pinched and he bites at his lip. “Ooh... Here I go: it hasn’t even been that long, but I honestly can’t imagine us apart.  We’ve both gotten ourselves twisted into this crazy journey, but we’re somehow still treading above shore. Because we’re both here still, together, for each other. I guess what I’m trying to get around to saying is...” He clears his throat, turning his eyes, raw and glistening with the light in his heart right on Keith’s face.  “When you were dying...and you were trying to tell me something, I couldn’t hear the words you were speaking, but I...I think I know what you were saying. And I need you to know...I feel the same way. ...I love you, too, Keith,” he says. “And I never _ever_ want to leave your side.”

A smile grows on Keith’s face.  “...Yeah?” he whispers. “You love me?”

“More than I thought a person could ever love,” Shiro whispers back.

Gently, Keith reaches up for Shiro’s soft beautiful face and he leans into him, breathing in his scent.  Keith props himself up onto the tips of his toes and kisses Shiro hard, beneath the golden of the lanterns that part into the wide dark sky, in their night that they’re forever going to find a home in...together.

“I love you too,” Keith whispers as he leans back.  “I meant it when I said it before I turned. I wanted it to be one of the last things I said if I died.”

“I’m glad...  I know life has been hard lately,” Shiro clings tightly to Keith’s face.  “...I know sometimes it feels like you want to give up on this, that there’s no point to it, that it’s not who you are, but I truly believe we’ll be alright.  We have each other. We’ll learn how to make things right from there. If you’re sad or upset, let me in. I want to help. If you want to move, I’ll move. If you need to stay, I’ll stay.  I want what’s best for you, Keith. I don’t ever want you to feel like life isn’t worth living.”

Keith presses his lips together tightly against the emotion in his throat.  “What did I ever do to deserve you?” Keith whispers, letting his forehead fall to Shiro’s.  He thought Shiro looked like an angel before...he thinks it even more now.

“I ask myself the same thing every night when I wake up beside you.”

Keith laughs.  It’s so corny and dorky, but Shiro is so purely genuine that it pulls at his heart.  His laugh sounds almost like a sob because his heart is _so full_ and he loves Shiro _so much_.

“You too, Shiro,” Keith breathes.  “If there’s ever anything you want from life, I want to help you get it.”

Shiro leans back from Keith, hands still weaved together.  He nods to the flowers. “You want to deliver those, don’t you?  I saw the thoughts in your eyes as you looked at them.”

Keith chuckles and nods, rubbing his arm against his running nose.

Shiro looks up to the moon.  “We probably have time. I wouldn’t mind an adventure tonight.  Might be nice to go for a walk. Maybe even a run.”

“Yeah?”  Keith whispers, so very touched.  Shiro knows of the danger, but he will risk it for Keith’s happiness anyway.

“If we hurry, we can probably even make it to Allura’s.”

Keith grins, tears pouring from his eyes again.

Shiro wipes them away, chuckling softly.  “I’ll race you.”

“You’re _on_.”

 


	9. Chapter 9

 They go to the manor first, placing one for each of them in the house.  They set them on the rock out front where they’ll be seen in the morning, tied together neatly with twine - Shiro’s idea.  He thinks presentation is key.

And though Allura’s home is far, far away, they run through the trees anyway, like little forest sprites.  Keith sees the light on inside, warm and cozy in the middle of this cold forest. He runs his fingers over the wooden door and sets the two flowers down.

“Okay,” Keith smiles up at Shiro.  “We did it. What next? What about your family?”

Shiro smiles down and squeezes his hand.

He takes Keith to a small cemetery on the way to the village.  They kneel before their graves and Shiro runs his hands over their modest gravestones.  “My sister’s,” Shiro says, pointing out a newly made one. He looks beside it. “...Mine.”

They set the flowers out carefully.  Keith placing one on Shiro’s.

They make their way back to their little home.  It doesn’t seem so dark tonight. Keith has Shiro and he’s Keith’s sun now.

Keit grows tired as the sun pokes over the horizon, so Shiro grabs his yawning form up into his arms for the rest of the way back.

“I could’ve walked,” Keith grumbles sleepily.  “I’m perfectly fine.”

“Is that right?  Maybe you should be carrying me instead.”

Keith chuckles, blinking sleepily at the blessed sight of Shiro carrying him.  “Thank you,” Keith whispers. “Thank you for tonight. I feel like starlight.”

“Mm,” Shiro hums, turning his face toward the sky for a moment and then looking back down to Keith.  “You look even more beautiful.”

Keith chuckles, tucking his face into Shiro.

“Thank you too, Keith,” Shiro whispers.

Keith’s face is snuggled into Shiro’s neck and he runs his finger over the smooth unmarred skin there.

Keith wonders aloud.  “What do you think happens if a vampire bites another vampire?”

“Is that a hint?”  Shiro asks dryly, but he doesn’t shy away as Keith presses a long slow kiss to the vulnerable point.

Keith hums into his skin so that the sound vibrates.  “I heard they’re bonded for life.”

“Well, there are a lot of different tales.  I heard that the vampire doing the biting will die.”

“I heard it’s like a pleasure you’ve never experienced.”

“Ooh,” Shiro hums lowly, chest rumbling lowly with laughter.  “That so?”

“...But the death thing is kinda bothersome.  I’ve heard that one too.”

“Kind of, indeed.”

“Hmm,” Keith murmurs, closing his eyes.  “What if I wanted to try?”

“I’d probably let you.”

Keith chuckles sleepily.

“I thought you said you weren’t tired,” Shiro teases, nudging Keith gently.

“Mm.  Just a little nap...”

Shiro snorts and Keith can feel his chest heaving as he laughs silently.

Keith stays like that for awhile, content and happy as Shiro runs his fingers through the ends of Keith’s hair and down his neck.  The air is changing, dipping into a sharper chill, and Keith knows they’re almost back.

Keith could stay like this forever he thinks, content in Shiro’s arms for the rest of his days.  If Lotor weren’t moving in on the Blades, then maybe he really could.

Keith’s nose twitches, a sharp pain going up his sinuses like a burn.  “Ugh,” Keith mutters, waking from his half-sleep. “God, what is that? Do you smell that?”  He blinks his eyes open, looking around. They’re inside the depths of the temple, in the hallway, almost to their room.  Something’s wrong.

Shiro sets Keith down carefully, eyes sharp as he peers inside.

“Stay here,” Shiro says.

Keith stiffens, grabbing Shiro by the arm and pushing him back behind himself.

He snatches the knife from the inside of his garb and stands there for a moment, thinking.

It smells like a human.  They’ve been here for awhile, whoever they are, enough for their scent to permeate the place.  Hours maybe.

Should they just leave?  Should Keith confront them?  If it were someone dangerous, like Krolia, he thinks maybe they would’ve already been attacked or fallen prey to a trap.  Keith’s eyes cut across the hallway, seeking sign of something like that, but there’s nothing malicious around.

He can see the warm light of a candle in their room.

Keith and Shiro exchange a long look.  They could cut their losses now. They could just run.  They have each other; that’s what’s important.

...But...

Why else have they stayed this long?

The light shifts from inside their room, the glowing orange dancing along the stone in the hallway.  Keith tenses, hand clutching to the knife. He backs into Shiro, body still covering him protectively.  Keith grips his hand tightly in case they have to run.

He hears a voice, very quiet, very timid, “...Keith?”

His eyes fly wide.  It’s Pidge. It’s  _Pidge_.

He can hear the fear in her voice.  It trembles. “Keith, if it’s you...  I...”

He hates to hear her scared like that.  It’s...probably fine. Hand still clutching the knife tightly, he steps from the hallway and into the doorway’s entrance.

She stops as she sees him standing there.  Her face goes white with disbelief and she places a hand gently over her mouth.

She’s still for awhile, taking in the sight of him like she’s seeing a ghost come back to life.

“...Keith,” she whispers, eyes wide in shock.  Her lungs jerk as she tries to push down emotion.  “I knew it... I knew it was you. I know you couldn’t be dead.”  She’s trembling; the light flickers against the small space around them.  She presses a hand to her face. “... _Keith_ .  You’re  _alive_.”

She almost starts running through the room but Keith jerks back, spooked.  “Stop!” He commands. His voice cuts through the air with venom. He doesn’t sound like himself.

She freezes, drawing herself up and staring.  “W-what’s wrong? What’s...?”

“Don’t...don’t come closer,” Keith mutters lowly as he takes another step back into the shadows.

She stands in the middle of their room.  “Why...?” She’s probably been looking around, recognizing the place that’s full of Keith’s cluttered ways, their tent in the corner of the room, their mess of blankets and clothes strewn about.  The books. The trinkets. The herbs.

“How did you find me?”  He whispers.

“You’ve mentioned it before,” she murmurs.  “In your sleep after you got bitten by that vampire.  You said it’d be the last place anyone would want to go to, so I thought...maybe it’d be the first you’d hide.”  She breathes out, “I knew it was a longshot, but then I saw all this stuff here.” She laughs, the sound a bit wet, like she’s close to crying.  “God, it’s a disaster. Do you ever clean?”

His chest is heaving.  He doesn’t even need air.  He grits his teeth. “Does Krolia know?  Is anyone else here?”

“No,” she whispers, her brow furrowing.  “No, Keith, it’s just me.”

He nods slowly, letting out a breath of relief.  His gaze falls to the floor as he tries to think of how to approach this.  It’s quiet for a long while.

“You...  Was it not you who set out the flowers...?”  She mutters, and she holds one up, the exact ones they had only just laid out in front of the manor.

He rubs at his forehead.  “No,” he says in a small voice.  “I did...”

Her face falls slightly.  “...I must’ve misunderstood.  I thought -”

“No - I...  I’ve been wanting to see you, I just...  I wasn’t expecting it.”

She gestures to his outfit and the flowers in her hand.  She attempts a smile, but it’s hesitant. There’s more worry on her brow than anything else, but she tries to hide it, even in her voice.  “I see you finally got to go to the festival you’ve always wanted to go to.”

“...Yeah,” he whispers.

“You went alone?”

“No.”  He hesitates, and then, taking in a deep breath, he steps to the side, grabbing Shiro by the wrist and gently tugging him forward, into the light.  He hesitates and then says softly, “This is Shiro.”

Her eyes flicker down to their hands, held together tightly - Shiro clearly accepted into Keith’s tight knit defenses - and up to Shiro’s face.  Her sharp eyes stay there, her expression unfathomable. “...So,” she says lowly. “This is the vampire...”

He clears his throat and presses his lips together tightly.  “...What’d Krolia tell you?”

She shifts, but her posture is tight, like she’s two seconds from sprinting away in terror.  “That you left us and you were probably dead. She didn’t say ‘vampire’ but...all your questions lately.  Your moods. Your new hesitancies. I sort of... I mean, what else would it be? ...Are you safe, Keith?”

Keith whispers, “Vampires are different than we thought.  We’ve been so deluded.”

“Keith, let’s talk out here,” Pidge says, watching Shiro uneasily.  “You look pale. Some sun will do you good.”

Keith doesn’t move from his spot.  “I can’t go out there,” he says.

“It’s not an ambush.  I promise you. I just...  I’m sorry. I don’t feel comfortable.  I’m not used to just...calmly talking around vampires.  It sets my teeth on edge.” He can see the truth in that; her whole body tense, her shoulders tight.

“No, I...”  Keith takes a deep breath and shakes his head.  “ _I...can’t_...go out there,” he forces out heavily so that each word feels heavy with meaning.

She watches his face.  Moments pass by in which his words grow heavier and heavier over their heads.

She says, very slowly, “...What do you mean, Keith?”  But the weight of her words and the spooked look on her face says she  _knows_  what he means.

He swallows.  Whispers. “Sun is no good for me.”

“The sun...”  Her chest is starting to heave as she begins panicking.  “Like...you’ll get sunburnt?”

“Pidge...no.”

She closes her eyes tightly, pressing her fingers to the bridge of her nose.  “...You can’t?” She whispers, but it sounds like a wheeze.

He shakes his head slowly, watching her carefully, trembling with his own fear.  “I can’t.”

“Oh...”  She whispers.  “Oh...”

He remembers now, very clearly, telling her to kill him if this ever happened.  If she saw him as the ones they swore to kill. He sees as she remembers it as well.

She turns lost and confused eyes up to him, taking in all that he is, looking at him from head to toe.  She takes one step forward. She’s trembling. “Oh...” She whispers again.

She should do it.  If she was smart like Krolia trained them to be.  If she was the Blade that they all strived to be, putting the mission before all else.  Kill vampires. It’s so simple.

Pidge should get the knife in her belt and drive it through Keith’s heart.  She shouldn’t give him mercy. She shouldn’t even ask.

If Pidge wanted that, Keith would give it to her.  He could never hurt her. Not even like this. Maybe especially like this.

Instead, she steps forward through the darkness and very softly, very gently, she wraps her arms around him.  “Oh, Keith.” She trembles, tears falling onto his arms as she buries her face in his shirt. “Oh, Keith...”

“Pidge,” he hisses sharply.  “Pidge,  _stop_.  Don’t come close.”

“Why?”  She whispers.  “...I’ve missed you so much.  We’ve all been so scared for you.  I’ve been wondering what’s been wrong - why you’ve been hiding from us.”

“I’m a  _vampire_ ,” he tells her, voice cracking.  He tries to pull away, feeling primal fear carve up his spine.  “I’m a  _vampire!_   I could  _kill you_.”

“No,” she whispers, clinging to him tighter.  “...No, you’re you. You’re Keith.”

“But I...  But I’m...”

“‘First chance they’ll get’,” Pidge whispers, looking up at him, “‘and they’ll kill you’.”  She reaches up to place her hand on Keith’s cheek. “I’m still standing. You haven’t hurt me.”

Keith is speechless as he stares down at her warm trusting eyes.

She presses herself up on the tips of her toes, gathering him into her arms tighter.  He has to bend forward to fit in her embrace. She’s so warm. She nuzzles her face into the crook of his arm and sighs against him.  “I knew it,” she breathes. “I knew that you’d be the same.”

“My heart doesn’t beat,” he whispers.  “I...I can smell your blood. I  _want_  to drink it.”

She hums.  “But you’re not.  ...You’re still you.”

“Pidge,” he says, his voice tightening.  “... _Pidge_.”

“It’s okay, Keith,” she whispers, patting his back as he trembles in her arms.  “It’s okay. We’ve all been so worried. We thought you were dead. But you’re alright?  You’re not hurt? You’re...no one forced you into this?”

“I...”  He looks to Shiro, who has stepped back to give them privacy.  He leans against the wall, a small encouraging smile on his lips.

“...It’s a long story,” Keith murmurs, dazed.  “...But Shiro is... Shiro and I...” Keith doesn’t even know what they are.  “I made Shiro turn me.”

He doesn’t make any move to approach her and she doesn’t leave Keith’s side, still holding onto him though she turns to watch Shiro.

“So like a sire?”  Pidge murmurs. She looks to Keith.  “Does he make you do things for him?”

“What?”

“Like a slave or something?”

“Pidge, no, we’re partners.  Shiro and I are equals.”

“Oh...”  She’s still watching him suspiciously.

“He didn’t want this,” Keith whispers.  “He’s more of a victim than I was.”

Pidge turns her eyes back up to his.  “Krolia is suffering, Keith. Come back home.”

“You have no idea how much I want that, but I  _can’t_.  She’ll kill me.  Literally - kill me.”

“...I used to think that, but I don’t know anymore.  Ever since she found out you left, she’s been devastated.  Beyond what I would’ve ever guessed. She won’t eat, she won’t go on missions anymore, she’s been sleeping in your room every night.  She’s just dropped everything to search for you in her every waking moment. Each night, she comes back more and more hurt...”

“Did you give her my note?”

“What note?”

“Oh my god, Pidge.  The note I shot into her room.  You were right there.”

“I didn’t see a note; I didn’t have my glasses on.”

“ _Pidge_.  Lotor says he wants to kill her.”

Pidge blinks.  “Lotor?”

“ _Yes_ , Lotor.   _The_  Lotor.”

She bites her lip as she thinks but she doesn’t exactly seem surprised.  “...He has been around a lot more lately.”

“He tried to  _kill_   _me_.  He shot me through the chest  _twice_  and forced a vampire to feed on me -”

“-What?”

“Look,” he says, undoing his shirt and revealing the scars still on his chest.  “It would’ve been fatal.”

“Oh, my god,” Pidge whispers, running her fingers over the marks.  “...Keith... This is why - ?!” She looks at the bite mark on his neck.

“He needs to go down,” Keith snarls lowly.  “Before he hurts you. Before he hurts  _Krolia_.  He thinks Shiro’s her son.  He thinks she sent me here on purpose to keep him safe.  I’m worried he’ll find Shiro somehow.”

“But...Shiro has nothing to do with Krolia.”

“Convince him of that!  He’s made up his mind. He’s so focused on the kill he won’t listen to reason.  Pidge...you have to tell Krolia. I don’t know what I can do from here.”

“Come home, Keith...  Tell her yourself.”

“I wish I could.  I miss you all. But I’m a  _vampire_.  That’s not where home is anymore.”

“So you’re just going to live  _here_ ?  Keith, this is worse than a  _shack_.”

“Hey...come on, it’s not that bad.  We’ve done fine here.”

She looks to Shiro.  “ _You’re_ comfortable here?”

“I’m fine here,” Shiro murmurs.

“‘Fine’ is not very convincing.”

“Pidge,” Keith says.  “What are we supposed to do?  You saw what Krolia was like when I was hurt that one time.  You said it yourself: she was going to kill me the second I turned.  Well, I’m there now. I’m full-vampire. I can’t hurt her. I wouldn’t be able to even defend myself properly.  I don’t know what else to do.”

“But hide?  This isn’t like you...”

“Then what am I like?  Being a vampire wasn’t like me either, but here I am!”  He shouts. He pauses as he sees Pidge’s face. Her wide scared eyes.  He wonders what he looks like.

Keith takes a small step back, rubbing the back of his neck.  “...I’m sorry. I’m still coming to terms with it; it’s fairly new.  I don’t like it either. Neither of us do. But Shiro and I...” He says quietly, wishing Shiro couldn’t hear.  “I can’t die on him and leave him alone. We’re here for each other.”

Pidge takes a long deep breath, looking over to Shiro.  “...How did this even happen?”

“I started listening to myself and stopped doing what others told me was right.  Saving Shiro is the one thing I don’t regret in my life.”

Pidge is still hesitant.  She bites at her lip and puts her hands on her hips.  “I’ve got to think about this. There’s got to be a way to get you out of here.  To bring you back -”

“-Pidge-”

“-But in the meantime, what can I do?  How can I help you?” She looks so earnest staring up at him eagerly, waiting to hear a whole list of things.

Keith is taken aback.  He’s touched. He really is.  He isn’t sure what he thought would happen if Pidge were to find him, but to even hope for this would’ve been too much.

Shiro always maintained the Blades loved Keith like he did them, but Keith’s never really believed it until now.  He thought he was just their tool. Their pathetic tool waiting to be used because he had no other uses.

But he’s not.  Pidge is right here, waiting, asking him what he needs to be comfortable.  She’s here to help him.

He feels his throat tighten.  His eyes burn.

He loves them.  He loves them so much.  He’s crying.

Pidge blinks a little, surprise on her face.

“Sorry,” he mutters.  “I’m sorry. I didn’t think -  You’ve just been -” He wipes away the tears and then starts in surprise as he sees the red on his fingers.  “Ugh,” he grimaces. It’s blood. He’s crying blood.

“It’s okay,” Pidge murmurs, grabbing onto him as he tries to shrink away so she can’t see.  She holds him in place and grabs a handkerchief from her pocket, dotting it on Keith’s face.  She lets out a small amused chuckle. “I didn’t realize vampires could cry.”

He sniffs and lets her continue wiping the tears away.

“You’re okay here, just the two of you like this?”  Pidge whispers. “Did you want me to stay?”

He chuckles wetly.  “You just said this place is worse than a shack.”

“Well, it  _is_ , but if you want me to...”

“Thanks, Pidge, but it’s okay.  I have Shiro. You have no idea how much I care for him...and him me.”

“Hmm...”  She doesn’t know Shiro.  She doesn’t know what that means, but she smiles over at Shiro anyway.  “I’ll leave him to you then.”

“You were careful, weren’t you?”  Keith frowns in concern. “Coming here?  You didn’t leave any tracks?”

“Of course not, Keith, you know I’m good at that stuff.  Krolia taught me, after all.” She snorts, “but then again, she taught you to hate vampires and...  I mean... Now you’re going out on dates with one?”

Keith tenses in embarrassment, turning his eyes away.  “The festival was nice, okay?” He mumbles. “...But you’re right.  I don’t hate vampires.”

“No,” she murmurs, looking between him and Shiro.  “I see that you don’t. Be careful, Keith. Can I come check on you again in a few days?”

“Yes,” he breathes.  “Of course. But don’t tell Krolia.  And  _don’t forget_  the note in her room.  It’s  _essential_  she gets it as soon as you can get it to her.”

“Got my glasses on now,” she pokes at them.  She tosses her arms around him again in one giant hug.  He holds her back tightly, closing his eyes and trying to ride out the emotion flaring in him again.

“Thank you, Pidge,” he whispers, voice breaking despite himself.  “I’ve been so afraid of what you’d think... It’s been hanging over my head like a cloud for so long.”

She pats his shoulder as she pulls away.  “Same old Keith, worrying over nothing.”

He chuckles wetly.

“I’ll be back, okay?”

“Okay...”  Keith watches her go longingly.

She slips out and away and then they’re alone.

“...Keith,” Shiro murmurs, holding his arms out for him.  Keith falls into his embrace, letting himself be bundled up in a blanket like a burrito.  He’s so tired. He was barely keeping it together.

Shiro says softly, brushing his hands through his hair.  “...I wish you could go with her.”

Keith mumbles sleepily.  “...I’m okay here if you’re okay here.”

“I’m sorry.  If it wasn’t for me, you’d still be human.”

“If it wasn’t for you, I’d be dead.  I don’t regret, Shiro, so don’t do that.”

Shiro sighs heavily, cuddling closer to Keith.  “...Okay.”

“Alright.”

And Pidge continues to visit them.  She brings board games and cards. She brings plants that grow in the dark.  “They’re like you,” she laughs.

When she sees that Shiro had used up the entire notebook that she had given Keith (she laughed at that, teasing Keith about being ‘disloyal’), she brings Shiro another one with more ink to write out his recipes he finds.  She is unendingly good.

They play cards together in the dark and she warms up to Shiro quickly.  Who couldn’t with his gentle sturdy demeanor?

“Krolia’s been a bit better after your note,” she says, leaning into Keith’s side as she looks through her hand of cards.  “I thought she was going to cry when I handed it to her and she saw your handwriting. She hasn’t been drinking as much anymore.”

“I can’t believe she drank at all.  Should I send another note?” He wonders, and then thinks better of it.  “It’s probably enough that she knows I’m alive. Or...existing.”

She slaps a card down and nods for Shiro to go.  “I’m sure she wouldn’t mind another one. I said ‘a bit better’ not a raging recovery.  Kolivan had to talk to her this morning. He told her maybe she should sit out on the next mission.”

“What did she say?”

“She said -” Pidge jolts and squeaks as a mouse comes scurrying through, right through the doorway and straight at her.  “I hate this place!” She spits, running behind Shiro for protection, who chuckles at her reaction.

Keith rolls back, grabs the mouse in his hand, and he’s so comfortable with Pidge here, so at ease, he bites into it right in front of her without even thinking.

“ _Keith_ ,” Pidge screams, tossing a card at him.

“ _Keith_ ,” Shiro sighs in dismay.

They both start at him with disturbed looks on their faces.

“What?”  He asks around a mouthful of it.  “It’s fine. I can stop.” He looks down at it in his hand, limp, as if asleep.

Pidge wrinkles her nose, slowly creeping over to look at it closely.  She grabs onto Keith’s shoulders like it might attack at any second and inspects it from behind him.  “Wow. It just...lets you.”

“Mmhmm.”

“I wonder what it’s like,” she mutters.  “It looks...content.”

“I can tell you what it’s like,” Keith says, completely casual as he sets it to the side.  “Shiro fed on me until I changed.”

“ _Keith_ ,” Shiro chastises, eyes blowing wide with embarrassment.

“Well, you needed it.  I didn’t mind.”

Shiro grumbles under his breath.

“I kinda figured,” Pidge said, nodding toward the mess of scars on Keith’s shoulder and neck.  “What was it like? Did it hurt?”

“A bit at first, but the rest made it way worth it.”

Shiro presses a hand to his face.  “Stop. That’s  _private_ , Keith.”

Keith shrugs at Pidge as she sighs in disappointment, questions still rummaging around in her eyes.

She butts her face up into Keith’s, grabbing his chin and pulling at his cheeks to reveal his teeth.

“ _Pidge_ ,” he grumbles.

“It’s just so  _weird_.  Is there just a duct going through the tooth or something?  Where does the venom come from?” She pokes at the tip of it.

“Don’t do that!”  He tries to say around her hands.  “You’re going to hurt yourself!”

“How many other humans get the chance to inspect a live vampire up close?  Just let me. I’m naturally curious.”

“Personal  _space_ ,” he tries to groan around her work.  “Mouse blood,” he reminds her.

She lets go of him immediately.  “Oh. Gross. You’re right. Ew.”

“I feel like you’re using me.  You’re just curious so you can write your book.”

She laughs.  “Well, I’m writing it because I thought it was interesting in the first place.”  She wipes her hands off on her shirt and goes to sit back in his lap. She picks her cards up again and looks at the mouse, suspicious that it’ll wake up and come after her.  “Do different animals taste differently?”

Keith sniffs as he leans his chin on her head.  “Yeah. Mice are pretty gross. But I get hungry really easily, so I eat whatever I can get my hands on.  Shiro has more restraint. He can go for months. He gets  _grumpy_  but he can still do it.”

“I’m a bit more choosey,” Shiro says.  “I don’t like things that scurry or eat their own feces.”

Keith snorts.  “Probably why they don’t taste so great.”

Pidge laughs.  “I wonder what sort of vampire I’d make.  You’re so...chill about it.”

“It’s really not that different once you adapt,” Keith says.  “I’m kinda disappointed. I was hoping for superpowers.”

Pidge snorts.  “Maybe that comes with the feeding on humans.”  She looks to Shiro. “What was  _that_  like?”

He presses his lips together and looks away.  “God... It was so different. ...It was...intimate,” he murmurs softly, eyes going distant.  “It felt...” He breathes out softly, voice fluttering. “It felt like there was nothing more you wanted in the world.”

Keith smiles softly at him as Shiro turns his eyes up to Keith.  He wishes he could be that for him still, but Shiro loves him all the same.

“It was interesting,” Keith says, clearing his throat.  “When Shiro bit me, it was always warm and it felt  _amazing_.  But with the vampire at Lotor’s, it was...sticky.  Horrible. It was the only reason I was able to pull away.”

“That is interesting,” Pidge says, wheels turning in her eyes.  “I would love to study this... Could you -”

“-Nope.”

“You don’t even know what I was going to ask.”

“I know you, Pidge.”

She snorts.  “Okay, what was I going to ask?”

“You want us to feed on you so you can see what it’s like.  But there’s no way in hell.”

She crosses her arms and pouts.  “For science, Keith.”

“It’s really intimate.  I couldn’t do that with you.  It’d be  _weird_ .  It’s like asking to make out with me or something.   _God_.”

“You do it with animals!”

“Pidge!  Don’t say that!  You are ruining my only food source!”

“Okay, okay,” she chuckles, pushing off his knees to propel herself to her feet.  “Well, I’d better go, but I’ll visit you again in a few days.” She turns. “Though I’ve been thinking...  You can compel animals to get them to do what you want, right? So why can’t you just compel Lotor?”

“It doesn’t work that way.  It’s temporary. I’d have to be holding him in my grasp forever and I  _do_  get tired after awhile.”

“Well, why don’t we just do it the old fashion way?  Play with his heart? Let’s just get Allura to talk to him?”

“Allura?”  Keith sighs.  “Do you hear what you’re saying?  Allura won’t leave her house.”

“I know you’re scared of telling anyone the truth about you, but maybe, if it came from  _you,_ she’d be willing to help.  I don’t think she understands what a huge problem Lotor is to us.  To actually try to kill you? Allura cares for you, Keith. If she knew the truth of that...”

“I can’t,” Keith says.  “I can’t do that. She’s suffered enough, we can’t  _force her_  to come back just so she can babysit that shithead Lotor.”

“So our other option is kill him?  Keith, you’ve been saying yourself that you don’t  _want_  to kill anyone anymore.”

He sighs heavily, rubbing a hand over his face.  “...If it’s to protect you guys -”

“-Just ask her.  I have to go tomorrow anyway, so write a note.  I’ll deliver it.”

“Tomorrow?  Stocking up on potions?”

“We’ve got another mission.  Twelve of them this time.”

“Don’t tell me: Lotor suggested the mission.  Even after everything I said?”

Pidge sighs and shrugs.  “...Honestly, Keith, I think they’re still trying to figure you out.  If it helps, I tried to tell them I trusted you, but I can’t let them know I know more than what they said about your plight, which was next to nothing.  They think my knowledge is limited.”

Keith snorts, unamused.  “Lord forbid they think that about you.”

“Here,” she says softly, grabbing one of his books from the corner and flipping it open to a large open map.  “This is the house. Tonight at four, before sunrise. What’re you going to do?”

Keith looks to Shiro.  “...Maybe we can provide backup.”

“Can you fight?”  Pidge asks Shiro.

“I can hold my own,” Shiro says.

Keith shakes his head.  “He’s better than that; I’ve been teaching him.  But I’ll be there, so he’ll be fine. Don’t tell the others I’ll be there, but if something goes wrong, I want to make sure I’m close...”

“What’ll you do if she sees you?”

He shrugs.  “Let’s just hope she doesn’t see me...or Shiro,” he murmurs, frowning at Shiro.  “Maybe you should -”

“-No,” Shiro says firmly.  “That’s what you said last time and you always come home more damaged than before.”  He grabs Keith’s hand and scoots in closer. “I’m staying with you.”

Keith watches him back and then nods slowly.  “I did regret it last time.”

“You did.”

“Tonight,” Pidge says, watching the two of them closely.  “Four. I’ll be there; so will Lance and Hunk, Acxa and the others.”

“Hmm.”  He tries to quell the homesickness in his belly, the feeling of apprehension (excitement?) that he thinks he feels and wishes he didn’t.  He worries how seeing them will hurt him. “Do they ever mention me...?” Keith asks in a small voice before he can stop himself.

Pidge smiles crookedly at him as she lets out a small chuckle.  “Are you worried we’re forgetting about you? Everyday, Keith. They mention you everyday.”

When Pidge leaves, Keith catches the mouse as it begins to wake up and bites into it.

“God, Keith,” Shiro chuckles wearily as he lays out on their makeshift bed again.

“Kiss me,” Keith says, laying out on top of Shiro lazily.

“No.”

“Come on.”

“Not after what you just ate.”

Keith sighs and snuggles up to him.  He feels happy here. Seeing Pidge helps so much.  Laying with Shiro is what keeps him sane.

Shiro caves easily and gently takes Keith’s chin in his hands, kissing him gently on the mouth.  Keith eases into it, but, sadly, it’s becoming day again, so he feels himself falling asleep. He’s not as good as Shiro at avoiding all these vampire quirks - hunger and sleep especially.  Shiro’s gotten better at pulling in and out of sleep like a regular human and Keith is a little jealous. Most of his sleep is dreamless and empty. He falls asleep kissing Shiro and, honestly, that’s the best way to go.

He could live this life, he realizes.  He's getting used to it. Monotonous, yes, dark and kind of claustrophobic, also yes, but he’s with Shiro.  Pidge visits him and treats him like he’s a person still, not a monster. He doesn’t have to hurt anyone. That’s all he needs to ask for.

Krolia’s smart.  Krolia is strong.  She knows everything now.  She doesn’t need him.

But maybe he can watch after her just one last time and then maybe, just maybe, he can try to let her go.

 

Keith and Shiro set out early, sneaking through the town and trying to scope out a good vantage point that even Krolia would miss.

“Maybe the church,” Keith murmurs.

“Won’t we be struck down or something?”  Shiro turns his eyes heavenward.

“Let’s try it and see,” Keith says, racing for the church and climbing up the back wall.

“Keith!”  Shiro grits out as he watches.

“Ah, it’s so nice to have all this strength behind you,” Keith says happily as he runs up the side of the building and leaps, grabbing onto the edge of the roof.  Shiro looks up at him from down below, his face a mask of shock.

“How’d you do that?”

“Try it.  It’s easy.  And look, I still haven’t been struck by lightning.”

Shiro frowns at Keith before sighing.  “Uh... I wasn’t raised being taught martial arts.  I was raised sitting in front of the fireplace, reading books.”

Keith snorts.  “Come on. You’re a natural at it,” Keith says, still hanging.  He heaves himself up and lays on his belly, holding his hands out over the edge.  “I’ll catch you if you fall. But you won’t. For someone reading books all the time, you’ve impressed me.”

Shiro purses his lips, eyes scanning across the side of the building and then back to Keith.  “You’re crazy.”

“Just _try it_.”

“If I break my neck -”

“-Your vampire powers will heal you.  Krolia broke every bone in one vampires body once...grew back into place overnight.  It was insane.”

“Ugh,” Shiro breathes out sharply.  “That is not what I wanted to hear.”  He screws up his eyes in concentration and then copies what Keith had done, scrambling up the wall and catching the side of the roof.  He makes it look easy. Natural.

“See?”  Keith grins cat-like over at him, leaning his head casually in the pillow of his arms.

Shiro grins back at him and heaves himself up.  “Some parts of this body are pretty amazing,” Shiro says.  “I can see so far out,” he hums, standing tall on the roof, overlooking the soft rolling hills in the distance.  “Look out there,” he says, putting his hand on Keith’s shoulder as Keith pulls himself to stand beside him. “Is that a cow?”

Keith snorts.  “This  _is_  farmland.”

“I wonder if someone lost theirs.”

“With how expensive they are these days?  Not likely.” Keith watches it happily before closing his eyes and letting the wind blow past them, cutting around his arms, his legs, his being.  Some things are different. Some things are the same.

“...Mmm.  I used to love going out in the fields and trying to get the wild horses to let me ride them.  That was so nice. I did it some nights beneath the full moon. There’s nothing like it; just this gentle hush of the night around you.”

Shiro laughs.  “That sounds like you.”

“I was pretty good at it.  Some books say animals naturally fear vampires though.  I’m glad it doesn’t seem to be true... Though I guess compulsion isn’t a good substitute for trust...”  The thought really brings his mood down for some reason.

“A lot of what the books say aren’t true,” Shiro amends.

Keith smiles at him.

He doesn’t see the Blades getting into position, but he knows the time must be near.  “Let’s be careful,” he murmurs. “They’ll lump you in with the others if they see you. They won’t hesitate to kill you.  I mean that.”

“I’m staying by you.”

Keith turns his eyes to Shiro.  “...I don’t know if they’ll give me any mercy either.”

“Let’s be careful then,” Shiro hums.  They both lay low on the roof, staring down.

Shiro takes in a long nervous breath.  “Did it ever scare you?” Shiro whispers.  “Fighting like this?”

“I don’t know,” Keith says truthfully.  “I’ve trained since before I could remember.  When I was younger, I was just excited to be able to follow in Krolia’s footsteps.  I loved it, at first... It was easy to believe that we were only doing good...without the consequences.”

Keith’s eyes catch sight of movement.   “The interesting thing about vampires,” Keith says.  “Is they always seem to think they’ll be stronger than humans.  Even knowing who we are. ...Were. They see a fight and they don’t want to run.  They want to fight it. Maybe humans are like that too.”

It’s happening now, down below.

“They went into the barn,” Shiro says, tossing his eyes to Keith.

“We can’t follow,” Keith sighs in distress.  “Being a lookout is equally as important.”

“I guess,” Shiro whispers, looking down the pathway.  “Are we watching for Lotor?”

“Any of the Galra.  I don’t trust them.”

“Isn’t lumping all the vampires into one what we want to fight against?  How are the Galra any different?”

Keith huffs a sigh.  “Yeah, you’re right. But when you have each of those people swearing their allegiance to Lotor...  None of them seemed to have any remorse as that vampire bit into my neck. They all just laughed; the fucking pigs.”

Keith adjusts the belt at his waist, itching to leap off this building and join the fight.  The barn is big and he can see as someone scrambles out the window, only to be hit in the back of the head with an arrow.  “Lance is getting pretty good with that bow,” Keith hums, but he watches the dead vampire on the ground with a weird sense of tension in his heart.

“Wasn’t there an arrow sticking out of the vampire’s back who attacked you that first day I saw you?”

Keith laughs lowly.  “I said ‘getting’ pretty good, not that he started that way.  You should’ve seen Pidge and Hunk too though. They’ve made a lot of progress...”

“Maybe you should be in charge of them,” Shiro says.

“...I was supposed to.  I had wanted it for so long and Krolia offered it to me but then...then I found you.  And on one hand, I had this beautiful vampire sleeping soundly in my room, on the other I had more battles, more fighting, something I didn’t want to do anymore.  The choice was harder than it should’ve been.”

There’s a loud howl and a bang and Keith blinks.  He’s antsy as fuck.

Shiro puts a hand on his shoulder.  “You okay?”

“I just...  I’m used to being by their sides as we fight.  Sitting back is a big challenge, especially as strong as we are.  We could do so much good.”

“Keith!”  he hears someone calling his name in a hushed harsh whisper and he looks down to see Pidge waving her arms.  She has a vampire in her hands, their own hands tied behind their back. “White flag. I gotta go back, but -”

“I got him,” Keith says, leaping off the side of the church and landing like a cat on the ground.

“Holy shit, Keith,” Pidge grumbles.  “Watch yourself or you’re going to get hurt.”

“My bones will regenerate.”

She shakes her head in disapproval at him once before running back inside.

Shiro lands carefully beside Keith and they bring the vampire out of sight, around the building, into the darkness of the trees.

“You’re fighting with the vampire hunters?”  The vampire asks incredulously. He looks both scared and disgusted.

“I wasn’t always a vampire,” Keith raises an eyebrow.  “Did you say you wanted to be killed? Because I can arrange that, I promise you that.”

He shakes his head quickly.  “I said I wouldn’t fight. I don’t hurt anyone.  I swear.”

Keith watches him evenly, arms crossed.

“...What are you going to do with me?”

“That’s up to you,” Keith says lowly, leaning in.

“Keith,” Shiro says firmly, gently placing his hand on Keith’s shoulder.  He turns back to the vampire. “This isn’t an interrogation and we’re not here to scare you.  ...We’ll let you go, but we need to know you won’t hurt others. Innocent people’s lives shouldn’t be sacrificed for ours.”

“I promise,” the vampire says.  “I would never. I’m telling the truth.”

Shiro stares hard at him.  Is he compelling him? Keith watches him carefully.

“I believe you,” Shiro says finally.

“Thank you,” he whispers.  “I have a family... Thank you.  Here, have this,” he says, presenting them with a finely crafted knife.  Keith likes it immediately, testing out the weight in his hand.

But still, it feels so wrong, letting him free.  Keith is all tense and irritated in the face of it.

Shiro massages the tight muscles in Keith’s back and says lowly into his ear, “If that were me, wouldn't you hope someone else would've let me go?”

“Of course I would,” Keith sighs.  “Feels  _wrong_  though.  I know  _you_ .  I don’t know  _him_.  For all we know, he’s running off to go suck someone’s blood.”

“Easy to tell when someone’s lying though, isn’t it?”

“I dunno.  Is it?”

“When you’re compelling them.”

Keith blinks up at him in surprise.  “Did you...?”

Shiro is smiling cheekily.  “You can force someone to tell the truth.  And that’s what I did. No harm done.”

“Really?”  Keith hums.  “Wow.”

“I’d bet you could make them do whatever you wanted; you seem better at it than me.”

“...Interesting...  Let’s go back above.”

But before they can do that, it’s over.  He can hear Lance and Hunk congratulating each other.  Pidge is hanging behind them. He knows she knows Keith is close, but she doesn’t let it be known.  Krolia follows behind. She’s hurt, holding her arm.

“You didn’t have to do that, you know,” Pidge says lowly.  “I had it.”

“Looked like you didn’t,” Krolia says curtly.

“He hesitated.  I thought -”

“- _Vampires are liars_ .  Kill them before they kill  _you_.  I’m not saying it as a joke, I’m saying it so maybe it can save your life too...”

“Lotor said there were twelve,” she hisses.  “We only had ten bodies. There are two still out here.  I had them all in my line of vision.”

Pidge sighs.  “I’m sorry, Krolia.”

So one’s missing since Keith and Shiro let the other go.  Keith scopes out the forest, opens his ears.

Dawn approaches.  They don’t have much time.  But that extra vampire count bothers him.

Krolia’s in bad shape.  It’s not just the wound on her arm, it’s her demeanor.  Everything about her is dragged down and weary. Keith’s never seen her like this.  He wants to approach her, ask her what to do.

“We should go,” Shiro whispers, but Keith shakes his head, following Krolia and the others a few houses behind.  He scopes. Searches. He can’t let them get hurt. Krolia’s not even paying attention, stuck too deeply in her head.  It’s almost like...she’s given up. Her eyes are dull and her posture looks sick as she stares blankly into the floor.

“Something’s wrong with her,” Keith says lowly.

Shiro takes in a long breath.  “...Keith,” he mumbles.

Krolia?  Worse than before?  God. When Pidge had said Krolia was doing better, he thought she’d look  _normal_ .  What is  _this_?

“Keith, the sun...”

“I know,” Keith grits out, casting his eyes up at the horizon that’s slowly getting brighter.  He can feel his skin tingling, feel the air pulling into his lungs burn at his throat. It won’t be long now.  “I  _know_.  I just have a bad feeling.”

“We’ll  _die_ , Keith.  You will first.  You’re already burning!”

“I  _know!_   Just  _wait_!”

And there - movement in the shadows.  The vampire in question darts out from behind a tree.  No one is ready.

It heads for Krolia.

Krolia looks up, sees it.  Keith can see her hand twitch - a reflex - and then, quietly, she subdues it.  She does not move. She does not prepare to fight it.

 _What is she doing?!_   Keith doesn’t have time to think.  He grabs his knife from his belt and throws it as hard as he can.

With one solid  _thunk!_  the knife plants itself into the vampire’s head and it falls to the floor in a boneless heap.

Lance and Hunk are on it immediately, but Krolia turns, startled, toward Keith’s location.

He ducks.

 _Go!_   Keith mouths to Shiro in a panic, grabbing him tightly by the hand and running.  There isn’t time to go home, not with the way the horizon is glowing golden. Keith kicks open the nearest cellar door, shoves Shiro in, and locks it from inside.

They wait.

...They wait.

But no one comes.  There are no sounds of footsteps or shouting.  Keith heaves a weary relieved sigh and they look around the room they’re in.  Hay on the floor. A pitchfork, some buckets.

“Have it locked well?”  Keith asks.

Shiro nods to the metal pipe he bent like a pretzel around the doors handles.  “We’ll be fine. ...Come on, let’s rest.”

“Do you think she saw me?”

“I don’t know,” Shiro says.  And that’s really all there is to say.

Keith shakes his head slowly and closes his eyes.  “...That was my knife,” he mutters. “She’s going to go back and see it.”  Keith grits his teeth. “...She’s going to know.”

“Maybe it’ll bring her peace,” Shiro murmurs, holding his hand out for Keith.  Keith sinks into his hold, sighing. “When she turned toward us, she didn't look angry to me.  She looked...hopeful.”

Keith had thought that too.  It was like she’d been waiting for him to do exactly what he did.  Like she knew he was there.

Or maybe Keith’s just being hopeful too...

They sleep.

If Keith thought seeing Krolia would help, it didn’t.  It’s like his heart is buzzing unhappily again.

When they make it back to the temple the next night, Pidge is already there.  “Holy shit!” She cries when she sees them, jumping to her feet and tossing herself over them.  “Why’d you stay there so long?!” She gripes at Keith as she grabs his face in her hands and squeezes his cheeks.  “I thought you’d gotten caught in the sun and  _died_!”

“We hid in someone’s cellar.  I had to make sure Krolia was okay.  Pidge, she looks awful.”

Pidge rocks back onto the balls of her feet, sighing heavily.  “I know. What did I tell you? She needs you home, Keith.”

“I can’t,” he whispers, looking down at his hands.  “ _I can’t_.”

“...Not all vampires are bad,” Pidge says, rubbing out the worry in his brow with her thumb.  “Sometimes they’re bad,” she murmurs, looking down at a long nasty cut up her arm. “...And sometimes they’re not,” she pokes him on the chest and then points to Shiro.  “She needs to learn that.”

Keith shakes his head, turning from her.

But Shiro is there as Keith turns, biting at his lip with a strange look on his face.

“Not you too,” Keith whispers.

“Keith...” Shiro says hesitantly.  “We’ve had so many chances to run from here, to get somewhere safer.  Each time, you’ve shot it down. Why have we stayed, Keith?”

“I...the ocean...  We know the terrain.  It’s nice weather.”

Shiro shakes his head.  “...You know why we’ve stayed...  It’s time to stop lying to yourself.  You can’t hide from her any longer. You both need this.  It’s  _time_.”

 


	10. Chapter 10

Keith goes out to the lake.  It’s usually something that he and Shiro do together, but he’s had too much of his and Pidge’s blunt honesty in one day, so he needs a bit of a break.

God.  He knows they’re right.  He can’t just leave all of them, but he’s not  _him_  anymore.  He can’t even see his goddamn reflection in the lake anymore.  He hates that. He kicks his foot through the water and falls back into the dirt, wondering what he’d even say if he did try to confront Krolia.

He thinks of how she’d react if she found out.

 _Even me_?  He’d asked Krolia those months ago, hoping he could be her exception.

_Even you.  You wouldn’t be you anymore, Keith._

If he had changed, if he felt different, maybe then he could forgive that.  But he’s still him. Painfully so. Maybe he has to drink blood, but don’t people eat flesh?  Maybe he cries tears of blood, but there’s salt in human tears too... He can climb buildings, but it’s not like humans don’t also have a way...

...He’d never move her with that argument.  What angle could he take?  _I love you, you’re like my mother, please don’t kill me_?  Jesus.  That’s no good either.

He could challenge her to a duel maybe.  Whoever wins gets to explain their side of the story, but then, even if she’s tired and weary and looks like shit, the chances of Keith still winning against her...not likely.

A note again...only with the whole truth??  Or just sending Pidge with an explanation? ...No, that’d get Pidge in trouble.

Keith is just being a coward.  He needs to be strong, like Krolia taught him to be.

It’s been so long...even if he saw her and she accepted him by some miracle, he’s not even sure how to talk to her anymore.  It’d probably be awkward. Keith’s not so great with words and neither is she.

He sighs, rolling onto his side and pulling himself up.  He starts fiddling with the greenery at his feet, plucking little bits off and weaving them together.  Maybe he can make a little vine decoration like the one back at home. Maybe that’ll calm him down.

Keith’s earliest memories revolve around Krolia.  When he was younger, he honestly thought she  _was_  his mother until she started telling him it wasn’t so.  And it seemed like the more he pushed to get closer to her back then, the more she had stepped away.  So he stopped. He tried to bar his heart from her. He didn’t want to scare her off completely.

But it’s true, there are things she did for him that he won’t forget.  Like giving him her favorite knife just because he loved it, for example, or allowing him to take their storage unit - the lighthouse - and make it his own.  Whenever he watched Krolia and Kolivan’s training matches and he’d say, “I want to do  _that_ ”, she wouldn’t roll her eyes and say, “you’re too young”.  She’d pick him up and put him in the training ring. She’d teach him.

Keith knows what she means to him, at least, so maybe he gets her fear: he’s afraid too.

If those times when he’d asked her about his parents, if she told him about them...what then?  What if they were actually alive? If his real mother just walked right into his life after missing out on the first twenty years?  Would that make Krolia any less the mother she’s become to him?

No.

The answer is no.  It’s not the blood that matters.  Krolia’s been there for him at every turn.

Would she be here for him now, despite everything she’s maintained?

Shiro and Pidge seem to think she would...

Keith’s afraid to open his heart to the thought, but he can’t keep doing this.

He misses her.  Seeing her again...he’s both scared and excited all at once.  He just needs to figure out a way to do it right. Something that feels good in his gut.  Something that intuition tells him is attached to an outcome that’s going to be okay.

He weaves the vines together for a good hour, knowing that, with each moment that passes, he’s risking facing an even grumpier and more worried Shiro.  So, with a heavy sigh, he tears the mess in his hands apart. He tosses it away. Everyone else in the Blades was good at doing this sort of thing, but not him.  No comfort here.

He looks up to the sky.  It’s just barely past a new moon.  ...The blood moon will be soon. And once that rises, Lotor will try his bullshit.

Keith has to beat him there.  He has to earn Krolia’s trust before then...somehow...

He scatters the misshapen vines into the lake, watching as they slip away on the surface.  He didn’t manage to think of any good ideas.

He trudges the entire way back.

 

He means to go home, but somehow, he finds himself outside Pidge’s window.  He had climbed the rain gutter and knocks softly on her window.

She stares at him in horror, her hair up in a ponytail.  She’s in her pajamas, rubbing sleep from her eyes. “What are you doing?”  She whisper-screeches as she pops the window open. She pulls him inside by the scruff of his neck.  “You’ll kill yourself!”

“Pidge, you keep forgetting I can  _land_  that so easily.”

She frowns at the distance to the ground then looks back at him.  He’s already walking around her room, taking in the familiarity of it.  That smell of home, sweet and warm. It’s not even  _her_  home, it’s just a room she sleeps in sometimes when it gets busy.  Home is where her actual family is. But Keith loves it all the same.

He leans over the open book on her desk.  “You’re finally writing it.”

She walks over, running her hand over the pages.  “Yeah. Collecting notes anyway. I have the best source of information now.  Well, if you don’t mind, of course.”

“You know I don’t.”

“Does Shiro know you’re here?”

“No.  I came myself.  He’ll probably be pissed, but I just...  I wanted to talk about something. About Lotor.  I’m worried about what he’ll do when the blood moon comes around.”

“I already know what you’re going to say,” Pidge says quietly.  “She’ll be fine.”

“But Krolia’s from a line of people who have all been sacrificed and Lotor wants a  _sacrifice_.”

“But her blood’s been tainted, Keith.  You know this.  _Lotor_  knows this.  That’s always been the problem.  Why do you think she’s still alive?”

“...I know, but what if...  What if she finds a way?”

“How?  Trade her blood in for her dead ancestors?  No one else has blood that will do, Keith. You’re not hiding her son like Lotor wants so desperately to believe.  Everyone else is dead.”

“...So the sacrifices end with her.”

“She won’t be sacrificed.  No one is going to be sacrificed, okay?  Everything’s fine. Forget about Lotor. Krolia and Kolivan know about him.  They’re keeping their eyes on him, okay? You worry too much.”

He heaves a sigh and leans against her desk, closing his eyes tightly.

“I can go with you,” she says, “if you decide to talk to her.”

He groans and turns his glance outside.  “...I saw the lighthouse on the other night.”

“Yeah...  It’s sad, really.  It’s starting to bum me out; especially knowing you’re  _right_ on the other side of these hills.”

“It’s on again tonight.”  Keith murmurs again. He looks down at the mess of pictures Pidge has on her desk: her and her family all grinning together.  “...I’ll talk to her soon. I just need to figure out how to approach it. I want to be gentle about it. I don’t want to shock her.”

He thinks of the blood moon, getting closer.  “Soon,” he whispers.

“I think that’d be a good idea.”

As he leaps from Pidge’s window and begins his walk back to Shiro, he turns to the lighthouse one last time.  It was on earlier, but he sees it’s out now. Maybe the oil ran out. Maybe she gave up. Keith sighs and heads back.

 

When he comes back, Shiro is gone.

Everything’s still in place, but the lantern’s been snuffed out which is unusual in this blotted out place of darkness.  They always keep the light on. Keith can hardly see anything.

“Shiro?”  He whispers.  No one responds.

He hears something upstairs.

Someone talking.  Someone pleading.

“Shiro...?”

Keith pushes his way up the stairs and stops right outside the entryway to the Room of Mirrors.  He feels panic rising up within him as he takes in the scene.

Shiro’s standing there, close - voice tight, but steady as he holds it in his control.  “You don’t understand. I can’t - It’s not my place to say -”

Someone else replies.  “...Then it seems you’re useless to me.”

Keith freezes in shock as he hears that voice.  It’s Krolia.

 _Krolia_.

What is she doing here?  How’d she find them here?  Is it really her or is he dreaming?

Her voice is devoid of any emotion.  It’s just cold. To her, Shiro is just a vampire.  Shiro is just an obstacle in her way that could so easily be removed.

And that’s exactly what she’ll do.  What reason does she have to stop?

Krolia has her knife in her hand, poised perfectly to throw.  Keith knows of her poisoned blade. No matter where it strikes, a cut from her blade is deadly.  Allura’s antidote, their only hope for survival, is not part of their inventory.

No matter where it hits Shiro, he will die.  And Keith cannot have that.

He finally breaks from his stunned daze.

“Krolia _, no!_ ”  Keith shouts from the shadows and she turns to him - eyes flying wide - but it’s too late.  She’s already thrown the knife.

The blade cuts through the air, spinning with her deadly precision.

If Keith had been ready, he could’ve grabbed the blade in his belt and maybe, if he had been able to focus, he could have met her attack halfway.  He could’ve deflected it. Saved Shiro. No one would’ve had to get hurt.

But shock still has him by the throat even now.  He had assumed their confrontation would be different: he thought he’d be able to set the grounds for their meeting, that he’d be  _ready_  to some degree, not this.  Never did he think Krolia would come to  _him_.

He can see the shock in her face too.  The confusion at his plea. She doesn’t look mad at all.

But he can’t focus on her right now.

He does the only thing he can think to do in order to protect Shiro.  Keith darts out from the shadows, pushes himself through space, and throws his body in front of Shiro.

The knife plunges into his shoulder and tosses him backward.  He and Shiro fall to the ground in a heap.

There are two flat seconds in which no one moves.  Keith just breathes, staring up at the open ceiling of the Room of Mirrors.  Mind blank. Dread in his heart.

“ _Keith_ ,” Krolia breathes.

“Keith,” Shiro is saying in his ear, but for some reason, all he can focus on are the birds chirping off in the distance.

Keith pulls himself up slowly, feeling Shiro’s hands help guide him.  He looks down at Krolia’s knife stuck in his shoulder.

It’s just the shoulder.  It’s deep and painful, but, if he were human, it would’ve only been that.  It wouldn’t be fatal.

If he were human.

He knows what Krolia’s knife means, but still, his mind is scrambling desperately for a way out of this.  Already, he feels the poison sinking into his tissues. A sick burning poison, like fire is slipping into his tissue and boiling him from the origin out.

“Oh, no,” Keith whispers, turning his eyes up to Shiro’s.

Shiro’s preoccupied with the wound, his hands shaking as they hover over the knife, torn over not knowing what to do.  “ _Keith, god_ , why did you do that?!  I would’ve been fine.  _You didn’t have to do that._ ”

“No,” Keith whispers, shaking his head shortly.  “ _No_ , you don’t understand.  it’s poisoned.” Keith grips the knife in his shoulder and  _pulls_.  He yanks the blade from his chest and they both stare down at the neon purple that spreads out from the origin.  “We don’t have the antidote. I won’t survive.” He turns his eyes to Krolia’s and then over to Shiro’s. “Run,” he breathes, pushing at Shiro’s chest.  “Run.”

Shiro watches with blank eyes as liquid purple oozes from Keith’s wound.  Carefully, he brushes his hand down Keith’s arm, resting his fingers on his elbow.  “Poison?” he whispers in a daze as if he’s never heard the word.

“ _Go_ ,” Keith cries, trying to heave Shiro up while he still has the strength.  “ _Leave me_.”

But Shiro doesn’t.  He turns his gaze from the wound up to Keith’s face, and then, with some sort of sick anger, up to Krolia.  He pulls Keith into the safety of his arms, posture growing defensive. Keith can feel him shaking, but he doesn’t let it be seen on his face.

Keith looks up to Krolia too.  She’s staring at them blankly too, like it’s impossible what she sees.  She’s focus on the way Shiro’s holding him closely.

“Don’t tell me,” she whispers.  “...Don’t tell me. What Kolivan said was actually true?”

Keith places his hand on Shiro’s carefully.

Her eyes follow that.  She sees it and it’s like her brain is jammed.  Like she can’t compute. “No,” she says again. “ _No_.”  She closes her eyes tightly, despair overtaking her.  Her voice goes dark and heavy. “You’ve fallen for a vampire.”

Keith’s body is burning and he feels it, with a spike of fear in his chest, as his strength is slowly sapped from him.  “Go,” Keith pleads with Shiro on soft exhausted breath. “...I don’t want you to see me dying. ...Please, go. Do what we promised each other.”

Shiro just holds him tighter.  “If you think I’m leaving you, you’re crazy.”

Krolia steps forward, hands up carefully as if she’s taming a wild animal.  “Keith.  _Keith_ .  Listen to me.  You’re being  _compelled_ .  It’s bad.  It’s making you feel things that aren’t true.  You can’t listen to him. But you  _know_  you can trust me.  I have the cure.” She lifts a vial from her belt.  “Throw me the knife, Keith, and come here. I can release you from its spell.  Just come here. I’ll bring you home.”

Keith cringes, holding tightly onto his wound.  “Compulsion...” He breathes. He holds out his hand for the vial.  “Give it to me then.”

She takes another step forward.

“Don’t!” he cries.  He picks up her knife and holds it out...not for her, but at her.  His hand doesn’t waver. “Don’t come closer. I won’t let you hurt him.”

She draws her posture up tightly, trying to hold her emotions back, but they’re contorting on her face.

“The strongest compulsion you’ve ever seen, right?  Kolivan’s already said that. Give me the antidote and I’ll prove it’s not what you think.”

She watches him with her razor sharp eyes.  Stiffly, she leans down and rolls the vial to him.

Keith shoves the knife at Shiro for him to hold and then grabs the vial, uncorking it.  “Allura’s?” He asks.

She nods mutely, her eyes flicking to Shiro like she expects him to sabotage this.  But Shiro just remains calm, his body still curled around Keith, both hands holding Keith by the hips.

“Then I shouldn’t need much, right?”  Keith says to her, making sure that she’s watching.  Keith shifts and downs the entire vial deliberately, keeping his eyes straight on her.

He drinks every last drop, and when he’s done, he tosses the empty glass away.

Krolia watches him carefully, apprehension buzzing at the edges of her.  “...How are you feeling?” she asks hesitantly

He shakes his head slowly, trying to be strong despite the gnawing pain spread through his body.  “Krolia, I only took the potion because I want you to understand something. I’m not being compelled.  This whole time hasn’t just been some spell. I’ve led Shiro around willingly. It’s been my choice, and mine alone.  I ran away because I fell for Shiro. ...Shiro would  _never_  hurt you.  But, if I stayed there, you would’ve killed him.  He’s innocent -”

“-Vampires aren’t innocent.”

“He’s  _innocent_!”

“ _Keith, you are being such a fool_!”  She cries, her voice filling the entire room like the edges of razors.  She holds out her hand, offering it to him. It’s shaking. “Come home, Keith,” she whispers, voice burning.  Her eyes plead with him. “Please. You don’t belong here.”

He shifts to speak again, but heaves out a choke of pain as his shoulder rebels violently.

“ _Keith_ ,” Shiro whispers, going to press his hand to the wound, but Keith grabs his wrist tightly, barring him from the site.

“ _Don’t_.  It’ll hurt you too.”

“The poison will flush right out of your body, Keith,” Krolia says.  “It’s only fatal to vampires. You’ll be fine. It won’t hurt you. Come home and we’ll patch up your shoulder and that’ll be the end of it..”

“No,” he whispers, clinging to Shiro’s hand tighter.  “Not without Shiro.”

“I’m not leaving here without you,” she says, voice firm.

“You  _have to_.  Or you’ll have to kill us both.”

She shakes her head, pressing her lips together tightly in frustration.  “Keith -”

Keith turns to Krolia, face crumpling.  “Krolia. Krolia, listen to me. If you ever cared for me, you have to leave now...  Run. I  _need you_  to run.  ...Or you’re not going to like what you see,” he whispers lowly.

He clings to the wound as the pain flares again, as it starts consuming his thoughts and words.  He cringes against it, grasping blindly for support. Shiro grabs his hand and holds on tightly.

He always knew it would be bad.  He could see it on the vampires’ faces.  It was always a slow painful death. The pain just grew worse and worse until they couldn’t take it anymore.  Keith’s only just been hit and he already feels at his limit, but he knows there’s so much more waiting.

When the wave of pain releases him and he’s panting against Shiro’s shoulder, he hears Krolia still pleading with him.

“I’m not going home without you.”  She promises. “Forget the vampire and let’s  _go_ .  I will  _carry you_  if I have to.”

He closes his eyes wearily.  “...I can’t. I don’t want to hurt you, Krolia.  Just take the memories we have together and  _leave me_.”  He watches the pain in her eyes.  Feels it reflected upon his own heart.

He’s been such a fool for so long.  He sees her face now and wonders how he ever once thought that she couldn’t love him.  She has her own way of doing things, sure. She’s focused on her missions. She’s firm on her goal.  But she’s always,  _always_  been there for him.

As he lays dying, he’s starting to understand what the others were saying.

“Why?”  Krolia whispers in confusion.  “Why won’t you come? If you’re not compelled.  If this is really you... Keith, why?”

He swallows hard.  She’s just as blind as he is.  “Krolia,” he whispers.

“ _Why_ , Keith?!”

If it were anyone else in his position, she’d have realized already.  But the pain on her face says that maybe she already knows. Maybe she just can’t get herself to believe it either.  Just like Keith, all these years.

He takes her blade from the ground and pushes it weakly back to her.  “I love you,” he whispers. “Stay safe. ...Please. Please. Leave.”

Her eyes widen.  She just stands there, breathless, watching him in the most stunned sort of confusion.

“You...love me?”  She whispers, emotion welling on her face.

A wave of fire runs through Keith and he buckles beneath it.

And still, she doesn’t get it.

She’s seen Keith take a blade to the side before, holding firm without complaint, the biggest tell just an aggravated cringe.  She’s seen his throat torn open and bleeding out. She knows what he can take and what he can’t. She knows the knife would not hurt him, as a human, like this.  It’s just his shoulder.

But her life has been filled with a tragedy she can’t get over: her loved ones are dead.  She can’t lose Keith too. So she blinds herself to the truth. She doesn’t want to know.

Keith can see as Krolia watches him, as he falls back into Shiro’s hold, gasping for relief, clinging to his shoulder.  His shoulder that does not bleed.

“Shiro,” Keith breathes beneath the weight of pain, reaching up for him.  “ _Shiro_.”

Shiro holds him tightly.  “...It’s fine,” he chokes softly, weaving their hands together.  “You’re going to be fine.”

Krolia’s still just standing there, feet rooted to the spot.

“Krolia, please,” Keith grimaces between clenched teeth.  “ _Please_ , just  _go_!”

She’s breathing hard, eyes widening slowly.  The air cutting into her lungs is rocky and jagged.  “You...you’re  _fine_ ,” she says to Keith on a hair of a whisper.  “You’re okay... The poison can’t hurt you. As long as your heart is still beating, the poison can’t sit.  It can’t hurt you... It will only hurt vampires. Not humans.” Her voice crumbles and she presses a hand to her mouth tightly.  “ _Not humans_.”

He’s starting to writhe in pain, whole body tightening like a string.   Whimpering as it tears him apart. “Shiro,” he breathes out, choking.

Shiro gives Krolia one last careful look before turning his full attention on Keith.  He holds onto him tightly, says softly in his ear. “It’ll be okay, Keith,” he murmurs lowly.  “Everything will be okay. We’ll get you help soon, alright?”

“No,” Keith whimpers.  “Leave me. Don’t let her kill you.  Please, don’t. I want you to fulfill our promise.  You can still help people.”

Shiro grits his teeth as he looks over Keith’s pain-wracked body.  He turns his eyes to Krolia.

“...Help him,” Shiro says.

“He’ll be fine,” she whispers.

“He’s dying.”

“No,” she shakes her head again.  “No.”

“ _He needs you_.”

“He is  _not_  - a vampire -” she shakes.  “Not Keith. He’d never do that.  Not to me. Not to us. He wouldn’t do that.”

“He did it  _for you_.  For us!  He wants to protect everyone!”  Shiro heaves out a wounded breath.  “He’s still the same Keith. I know you love him.  I know you care about him. But do you only love him on your own terms?!”

She takes one stiff step closer, her eyes wide and filled with horror.  Another step. And another. Shiro slips a knife from Keith’s belt and holds it tightly, hand shaking.

“No...”  She whispers, her eyes bright and wired with emotion that cuts.  She’s starting to believe. “ _No_.  Not you,” she says to Keith.  “Not you...”

“I wish you could see,” Keith whispers to her.  “We’ve been wrong. We’ve been wrong all along. Shiro is good.  Shiro is everything you would’ve respected. Sometimes,” he fights for words as breath becomes nearly impossible to drag into his lungs.  “Sometimes the world isn’t as black and white as you wish it was.”

Her eyes are stuck on his as she looks at him, as she tries to understand.  He can see the devastation on her face. “ _No_.”

“...I’ve never hurt a human,” he breathes, reaching toward her, hoping, praying.  She jerks away sharply and stares down at his hand like it’s poison. “It doesn’t have to be that way.  I love Shiro, Krolia. And he loves me. We’re not soulless. We’re not monsters. Please... Don’t hurt him...  He’s the only reason I’m still here. Please don’t.”

“ _Keith_ ,” Krolia presses a hand to her mouth.  “ _Keith, no.  Why?!”_

But pain washes over him again before he can answer.  Maybe this is his limit. It feels like thorns are growing from within himself and sticking him through from the inside out.

Krolia looks like she’s going to pop.  She steps back, holds her spot, looks back to Keith.  Horrified.

“No,” she cries into her hand, tears build in her eyes and streak down her face.  “ _No_.  Not you.  Anyone but you.”

“I’m a vampire,” he grits between his teeth.  “But I’m _still me_.”

“Oh, god,” she whispers.  “Oh, god.”

She stumbles forward.

Shiro tenses, his hand clenching even tighter over her knife, angling himself over Keith.

She ignores him completely, falling to her knees beside them, breathing jaggedly.

It’s like his dream, the one where she held him as a baby.  The one where he was loved.

Keith stares up at her, at her sharp angled face.  She’s looked after him, always believed in him. Whether she’s his mother or not, whether she thinks he’s a monster or not, he finds himself content like this, surrounded by loved ones as he’s slowly consumed by flames.  He’s in Shiro’s arms, holding his hand tightly, looking up into the face of the woman who raised him. It’s a lucky death, so unlike the one in the swamps he almost had, alone and scared. Not many get this sort of ending.

“Right by your heart,” she hisses, face contorting again.  She snatches the knife right out of Shiro’s hand, ignoring his yelp, and cuts Keith’s shirt from the shoulder down.  She pulls it away and inspects the wound.

“You have good aim,” Keith whispers.  “Won’t be much longer.”

She looks up at his face.  Takes in the white complexion, the strange beauty only vampires have.  “...You really are a vampire,” she whispers and he’s not sure if it’s venom or fear in her voice.

“I really am...”

He thought she said she’d kill him.  She only stares. She reaches a slow hand up to his forehead and slowly pushes the hair from his brow, weaving away from his face.

She drags in a long shaky breath as she watches him.  “...We don’t have much time,” she whispers. “...You,” she says to Shiro.  “We need vervain and dill.”

“We have some.”  Shiro says quickly.  He looks down to Keith.

“No,”  Keith grabs onto Shiro tighter, holding onto him.  “No, don’t leave. That won’t help,” Keith breathes, staring up into her face.  

“If we leave it raw, it’ll buy us time,” she says firmly.  “Long enough for me to go to Allura’s.”

“Keith, I’ll be right back,” Shiro murmurs lowly, giving his hand one last gentle squeeze before setting Keith down gently and running off.

“No -” Keith tries to stop Shiro, but he’s gone already.  Keith turns to look at Krolia. “What are you doing?” Keith whispers, gritting against the pain.  “I’m your enemy. It’s your duty to  _kill me_.”

She doesn’t respond.  She pretends as if she hasn’t heard, looking anxiously after Shiro, her hand pressed gently to the skin of Keith’s shoulder.

It makes no  _sense_.

“ _What are you doing?!”_   He begs of her again.

“ _Stop it_.”  She breathes, her look cutting down into Keith.  “Stop it. What’ve you done, Keith...? What have you done?”  She presses her face into her hands and breathes. “I don’t know what to do.”

“Kill me,” he says.  “That’s what you’ve always told me to do.  That’s what I’ve always  _done_!”

She shakes her head slowly, desperation welling on her face.  She makes a small strangled sound in the back of her throat that sounds almost like a sob.  “...I  _can’t_ ,” she grits out. “Not you.  Anyone but you...” She closes her eyes and lets out a long low breath in an attempt to stutter the emotion welling up.  “I can’t believe this is happening. This has to be some sort of nightmare.”

“It was my choice,” Keith whispers harshly.  “ _I wanted_  to be a vampire.”

Her hands ball into fists and she clenches her teeth even harder.

“Here,” Shiro says as he runs back, holding the herbs out to her.

She tears them apart quickly, pressing them firmly to Keith’s wound.  His whole body tenses and he gurgles with pain.

“The sun,” Shiro whispers.  It’s stinging already. “We can’t...  Keith’s weaker to it than most.”

“Christ...”  She turns behind her to look at the way the sun is beginning to peek over the hills.  She picks Keith up into her arms and nods Shiro forward. “You chose the worst place to hide.  If the sun hits these mirrors...”

Keith just focuses on trying to stay awake.  Everything’s pulling him down, down, down. It’s like the poison is biting into his brain.  “How’d you find us?” He breathes out sharply.

“I’ve been watching Katie.”

She follows Shiro down and then lays Keith gently on the blankets.

He groans as a strange wave of pain twists him up inside.  “Krolia...”

“Here,” she mutters to Shiro, pointing at Keith.  “Keep the shoulder the lowest point. Have the poison try to drain away from his heart.  I’m going to Allura’s. She can make something to fix this. Don’t run,” she whispers. “I’m trying to help you.  If you run, you’ll die.”

“I don’t understand,” he whispers.  “I don’t get it. Why aren’t you killing me?  I drink blood. I’m exactly what you hate.”

She reaches a hand out, shaking fingers running down his cheeks.  The way she’s looking at him... Keith must really be fucked up to think he’s seeing it - the love in her eyes, like he’s the part of her heart he’s always wished he could fill.  It feels so nice. He feels so warm.

“Keith...”  She whispers.  “Don’t die. I have so much to tell you.”

With one last long look at him, she pushes herself to her feet and runs.

It’s just the two of them, Keith’s labored breathing filling the place with the sickly bloated feeling of illness.

“Shiro,” Keith breathes.  “I don’t think -”

“-Shh,” Shiro hushes him gently, gathering Keith in his arms and tilting his body slightly like Krolia told him.  “...I told you, didn’t I? Krolia loves you.”

“She’s probably getting the antidote so she can heal me and then kill me herself.”

“...Keith.”

“You don’t get it,” he chokes out.  “You don’t understand. She’s told me for so long...never trust a vampire.  They’re twisted. They’re killers. I don’t understand.” The confusion is killing him.

Shiro holds him close, rocking him gently.  “...She loves you, Keith,” he whispers. “It’s okay to believe it.  She loves you.”

Hours pass.  Keith feels like he is on fire.  He can’t sleep. He’s too weak to breathe anymore.  Even Shiro falls to the pull of sleep but Keith just  _burns_.  The burning inside of him is so distracting that he can’t hold onto the concept of time.  He just sits. Just waits.

Krolia comes back, carefully through the door, stopping against as she sees Keith.  She has a strange look on her face, like she still can’t believe it. “You’re awake,” she murmurs.

She shrugs the bag off her shoulder and sits near Keith’s side, eyes going over Shiro, who’s still holding onto Keith even as he sleeps.  “He’s in the way.”

“Don’t touch him,” Keith breathes weakly.  He meant for it to be a fierce demand, but he can’t manage it.  He can’t even move. He just stares at her with dull glossed-over eyes.  If she were to attack, they’d both be defenseless.

She doesn’t though.  She sets the contents of the bag out and looks to Keith’s messy makeshift alchemy set with the same sort of sad look Pidge gave it.  “You lived here all these months...?” she whispers, almost as if to herself. Her voice is tight. “All this darkness. By yourself?”

She looks down to Keith and her eyes fall on Shiro’s sleeping form.  Her face is filled with even more confusion. “...With your vampire...  With... _Shiro_...”

“...I love him...”  He whispers.

She watches his face quietly for a long moment, something strange in her eyes.  “...Well. We’ve never known how to live a peaceful life, have we...? Here,” she whispers, slipping her hand behind his neck and lifting his head gently.  “Drink this. You’ll feel better soon.”

Keith does as he’s told.  She’s careful as she handles him.  More careful than she’s ever been with him before, but it’s not from fear.  She’s slow. Patient.

“...Why?”  Keith asks as she lowers him.  He can’t tear his eyes off the strange soft expression on her face.  It bothers Keith. It doesn’t make sense. “...Why?”

She smiles down at him, warmth and something vulnerable in her eyes, like a blade that’s fallen from her grasp.  She hesitates on words, words she tries to wrangle with, to give to him.

She doesn’t do it.  “...Later. When you’re better,” she says.  “...I love you, Keith,” she says. But it’s so quiet, so faint, on the edge of the full weighted silence that he thinks he must be hallucinating.

 

When Keith wakes up, he’s not sure where he is.  Everything just feels different, like the air is made of stardust.  Like a weight is free from his chest.

He’s on a bed.  There’s Kolivan’s candelabrum set on a table beside him, lighting the room up just how he’s wished it to be.  Shiro’s sturdy back is beside him and Krolia is across the way, sitting on a seat at their table, watching Shiro with serious eyes.

Keith tries to talk but his words get caught.  He reaches his hand out, grabbing weakly onto Shiro’s arm.

Shiro turns.

“ _Hey_ ,” he says softly, smile warming his face.  “You’re awake.”

“...Where...?”  Keith grits out.  That hunger is back, a pole jammed in his throat.  He coughs around it.

“Same room as always.  Krolia just brought over some stuff from the church nearby.  Are you hungry? It’s been awhile.”

Keith groans and rubs at his face.

“I caught a mouse wandering past,” Shiro murmurs.  “But I can go out and -”

Keith waves him away.  A mouse will do.

“I can go out too,” Krolia says gently.  She’s still looking over, watching them closely.  Her voice is softer than Keith thinks he’s heard it, like she’s afraid speaking any louder will hurt him.

Keith pulls himself up slowly.  His shoulder is healed, but everything else hurts.  He gestures the mouse forward sleepily and Shiro hands it over.

It is clearly a rat and rats taste the absolute worst, but Keith grabs it anyway, watches how Krolia stays across the room, seated, face impassive.

The rat squirms in his hand, unruly, but Keith doesn’t compel it; he just stares at Krolia.  He frowns. Clears his throat. His voice is raspy. “...You’re going to watch?”

She rolls her jaw but shifts, so she’s facing the other way.  “...Better?”

“Yeah,” Keith says quietly.  He flicks his eyes up to Shiro’s and they share a look.   _Are you okay?_   Keith asks.

Shiro smiles faintly and nods.  He nudges Keith’s hand closer to his mouth and Keith, with one last nervous look at Krolia, bends down and drinks.

It’s awkward with Krolia there.  He doesn’t know exactly what she’s thinking, but he can guess: abhorrence, disgust.  But she doesn’t take down her mask of indifference. Keith’s not sure if it helps or not.

Before the rat is sucked too dry to recover, Keith lets it down carefully.

Krolia turns back, sees it still breathing, and frowns.

“So,” Keith murmurs lowly, casting his eyes any other direction.  “...You’re here.”

They’re both quiet.  She runs her finger over her lip.  “...You’ve been gone for so long,” she says after a while.  “I thought you were dead... I thought you’d run off with a vampire and let it kill you.  I didn’t think I’d even be able to find a body...”

“I would’ve been dead,” Keith says.  “If it wasn’t for Shiro.”

“...How?”

“I was trying to save a vampire.”

“Why?”

“Because it was  _innocent_  and we are a group of people who have vowed to  _save innocents_.  I couldn’t take it how we were doing things anymore.  Some were terrified.”

“That’s a ploy -”

“-No!”  Keith says sharply.  His words bounce around the room.  He clears his throat and rubs at his face.  “...Do you think I’m lying right now?” Keith asks.  “Do you think the pain I felt earlier was all just some game to make you fall into my trap?”

“No,” she whispers.  “But you’re different.”

“I’m not though.  My heart isn’t beating anymore.  I live off of  _blood_.  The sun can kill me.  By your terms, I’m a monster, just like them.”

“No, you’re not.  You’re Keith. I know you.”

“The others - maybe if you got to know them, they wouldn’t seem like monsters to you either.  But you never give them a chance. Everything you’re afraid of, you’ll kill instantly. I almost killed Shiro.  I almost did... But I stayed my hand and he saved my life...”

She watches him, but says nothing.  She sees the bite marks on his neck.

“I chose it.  I was dying and I wanted to stay with Shiro.  And I needed to warn you.”

“...Who did it?”  She whispers sharply.  “Who tried to kill you?”

“Lotor.”

She freezes, “Lotor?”  She whispers, eyes going wide.

“I said it in my note, didn’t I?  I wasn’t lying. Lotor is so stuck on revenge, on killing anything that he doesn’t understand that he’ll do  _anything_.  ...How is that on the side of good?”

She has no answer for him.

“Krolia, I’m worried about him.  I’m worried about  _you_.  He said -”

“-Wait,” she breathes, holding her head.  “Back up. Wait. Keith... I’m so confused.  I’m trying to understand, but it’s a lot to take in.  Why? Just...why? Why him?” She asks, gesturing to Shiro, who watches her calmly, still at Keith’s side.  “You’ve killed countless vampires. Why this change? Why now?”

“I...  I don’t know,” Keith murmurs lowly, looking down at his hands.  “I saw him in that clearing and just...something on his face. It’s like I could see myself in his expression.  And when I hesitated, I expected him to take advantage of that moment, but what he did...was save me...

“It’s not that I wasn’t listening to you, it’s just that I started seeing for myself...  Their pain, their pleas - it’s been killing me slowly. I’ve never wanted to hurt anybody -”

“-You’ve been  _saving_  people.”

“By sacrificing  _all_  vampires under the assumption that they’re all evil.  I want to save  _everyone_.  Saving Shiro was the best decision of my life.  If he’s ‘evil’ then I guess that’s it. I want to save ‘evil’ people too.”  He says the world firmly, staring her down. “Krolia,” he says gently. “I don’t want to hurt anyone anymore.”

She takes a deep breath, crossing her arms over her chest as she watches him.  “...Keith,” she whispers. “You’re this amazing  _force_ , and yet, you’re so gentle, so sweet...  ...Who would I be to not respect this choice of yours?”

He smiles faintly.  “...I still don’t understand why I’m still here.  Why you’re being so... _lenient_ .  After  _everything_  you’ve drilled into our heads about vampires.  I was certain you’d kill me immediately. It’s why I didn’t go home.”

She looks into the candle’s firelight, biting at her lip, her eyes dim and distant.  “...I’ve been lying to you.”

“Yeah, I  _know_.”

“No.  You don’t.  I’ve been lying,” she says again, bringing herself up.  She runs a hand over her face and breathes out slowly. “I’ve been lying to everyone...  Even to Kolivan. Though I think...he may suspect. But I don’t actually regret lying to anyone...except you.”

Keith frowns at her.  “Why would you lie to Kolivan?”

“Because I know he and I won’t see eye to eye on this,”  She takes a shaky breath. “And I wanted to protect you.”  Her voice fades to a whisper and she suddenly can’t look Keith in the eye.

“...Protect me?”  Keith asks. “From what?”

“You’re going to be mad at me,” she says softly.  “And I won’t blame you.”

“Okay...”

She inhales slowly and pulls herself up from her seat.  She walks across the room and pulls a chair up beside Keith.  He can see the way fear brews on the edge of her expression, almost like guilt.  She places her hand carefully in her lap and says softly, “Centuries ago, we were all one group: the Blades, the Alteans, the Galrans.  Though we were of different blood, we were all of the same heart. Of the same purpose. We maintained peace when there were problems and we all respected each other.  My ancestors were special though, beloved by the gods. Our blood was used for sacrifice. It was a great honor. Many in my family did not even show fear in the face of it.  They felt great pride.”

“I know that already,” Keith murmurs.  “I don’t understand why you’re telling me.”

She draws in a deep breath.  “When I was younger, I had a run-in with a vampire that tainted my blood.  It could not be used. I was also told I could not have children. I never intended to have a child, to bring them into this world only to have them slaughtered.  It seemed too cruel. And maybe it was selfish. Maybe it was horrible, but I...it wasn’t like it is now. There weren’t many vampire attacks. Maybe one every few months, not every few days.  I wasn’t going to kill an innocent child that  _I_  brought into the world when it was never their choice, but mine.  When the doctors told me I couldn’t have children, I was happy. But then, when my husband and I found out I was pregnant...we ran.

“Alfor and I were friends, and Alfor’s word was law.  I told him I no longer wanted to work with the Blades; I wanted to be with my husband, and he allowed it.  He said it was fine. ...But then our village was attacked. There were hundreds. It was a group we had heard of that went around terrorizing the country, but for them to come here, to our small village was...”  She shakes her head. “Everyone gathered in an attempt to help us. But we lost Alfor. We lost Zarkon. ...We lost my husband...”

“My parents,” Keith murmurs.

She takes a small breath in, leaning forward, still staring into the small blips of fire.  “...I came back too late. I found my husband in our home in a puddle of his own blood.” Keith’s eyes widen.  She never talks about this. Never. “If I had just returned a few moments before... I saw the vampire who did it come into the house, but I was busy trying to save someone else.  He was strong. He could’ve taken it, but he was soft too... He wanted to believe in the good in them...” She wipes a hand over her face. “...He was dead by the time I got there. I turned my husband’s limp body over and...beneath him...was our son.”

She tries to hold back the tears that threaten her.  Her voice is garbled with them. “He was hurt. I thought it was too late.  I gathered him in my arms and ran for Alfor, to get his help. If anyone could heal, it was him.  But he was dead too.” She breathes out. “I left that village to burn... I held him in my arms for days as I waded through the forest in search of help.  But only an Altean could and all the Alteans were dead. There was no hope, I thought.

“And then there was Allura.  Little Allura, Coran at her side.  She came from the trees to ask me her family’s fate.  ...She knew from my face. But even still, the first thing she did was help my child.”

“...Allura never told me this,” Keith whispers.

“No.  Because I told Allura never to tell.”

“I’m sorry, Krolia...” Keith says.  “I didn’t know it was like that.”

She whispers, “Everyone was so angry after that.  So full of blood lust. With Alfor gone and Allura just a child and confused, no one ruled.  Lotor was just old enough to know he wanted revenge and only that. With my blood tainted, and being only human, not a witch, I knew I’d have no say.  I knew what he'd want and what he'd do to get it. I told them the baby didn’t make it. I told them the baby died and that there was no way to get our revenge.  No one had seen the baby but Allura and Coran. Everyone assumed he was much younger than he really was because we had kept the pregnancy a secret. I made a grave for both of them.  I grieved... I grieved so much that no one doubted it, not even Lotor, who was bitter with the thought of not getting his revenge.”

She swallows hard, turning her weary eyes up to Keith.  They flicker with the light of the flames burning brightly beside them in the candelabra.  “...But he wasn’t dead.”

Keith freezes.  “...Your son didn’t die?”

She shakes her head very slowly.

“Who is he?”  Keith breathes, winded.  “Why wouldn’t you tell me?  I could’ve helped you!”

“Oh, god, Keith,” she laughs breathlessly.  “You know this story. I brought you back from the incident, telling everyone I knew your parents.  That the last thing they asked was I take care of you. ...When you were a child, you started asking about them and I’d have no idea what to say...  I didn’t know anyone in that village, Keith. We were in hiding.”

“What?”  He frowns at her, going very still.  Very confused. “Then who were my parents?”

“Keith,” she says again, completely winded.  She closes her eyes and places her hand over her heart.  “...I wanted to name our son ‘Yorak’.”

“Yeah,” he says.  “You told me.”

“...My husband wanted to name him ‘Keith’.”

Keith just stares.  “...What...?” He asks faintly.  He’s not sure what kind of face he’s making, but Shiro scoots closer to him, supports him with his hand at Keith’s back.

Krolia bridges the distance between them, gathering Keith’s hands in hers.  “I lied to you,” she whispers, tears building in her eyes. Keith can see them glistening in the warm candle’s light.  “I knew I should tell you, but I was so afraid, as a child, that you’d accidentally let it slip and then I’d have to watch the rest rally around your death.  Your father’s death hit me in the hardest way... I could not go on if you died too.”

“I’m-?”  Keith breathes out, blinking quickly.  “What?”

“You’re my son,” Krolia whispers, squeezing his hand tightly.  “ _You’re my son_.”

When he was little, he used to wade out into the calm ocean and stare down at his reflection, looking at the angles in his face, the big sharp eyes, the nose, the lips, the hair.  He used to pretend he looked like Krolia. He used to pretend that she was his mother. But it killed him thinking that she wasn’t.

“You’re - ?  My - ?”

“Keith,  _breathe_.”

“You’re my  _mother_?!”

She nods.

“You just -”  He shakes her hand off.  He feels claustrophobic. He’s wheezing.  Dizzy. “You just let me think you were dead?  You just let me think I had no one?”

“Keith,” she says quietly.  “I needed to make sure you’d be  _safe_.”

“I wanted a family for so long,” he says, staring at the walls incredulously.  “You  _knew that_ .  You knew it and you just said...  You just told me I was  _strong on my own_ .  I was like  _six_.”

“...I know, Keith.  I know,” she whispers.  “I regret so much. But I was always right there with you if you needed me.  I helped you and raised you as much as I dared without anyone getting too suspicious.  And even as it was, I allowed too much.”

“I always wished you were my mother,” Keith whispers, cringing as he feels the tears coming up.  He knows there’ll be the shock of blood as he cries. He wants to hide himself. He puts his hands over his face.  “But you always kept me at a distance.”

“I’m sorry, Keith,” she whispers.  “I’m so sorry. I’ve loved you this whole time.  I’ve loved you with my entire heart.”

“God,” he wheezes.  He can’t stop them. The tears well up in his eyes and pour down his face.  It’s disgusting. She’s right here. His  _mother_ .  And he knows how she detests his kind.  He doesn’t want her to see him. He’s always wanted this moment, but it’s  _wrong_ .  He’s  _wrong_.  “Oh, god.”

All along...everything he’s ever wanted has been right in front of his stupid face and he was too scared to let himself see.  And she was too scared to let herself be seen.

He realizes it all makes sense.  Everything. Her standoffishness.  The way she cared for him, but held him at a distance.  He knew that she loved him in some way, but...as a mother.  As his real mother. The thought is too much.

She runs her hand over his cheek, brushing his bloody tears away with her bare fingers.

“Don’t,” he shies away, clinging to Shiro.  He disgusts himself.

He sees as hurt stabs across her face.  As she sinks back.

“This is... _a lot_ ,” he says.  He shakes his head again.  This has to be some sort of weird dream.  “ _For twenty years_.”

“I know.”

“Were you ever going to tell me?”

“I...  I wanted to,” she says softly.  “But I was starting to think it’d be better if maybe you never knew.  I was afraid of what you’d do if you knew.”

He shrugs incredulously.  “Have a  _parent._ Be  _content_  maybe?”

She just watches him steadily.

“...What?”  He asks. “What did you think I’d do?”

She hesitates for another moment before saying uncertainly: “The way you throw yourself into everything headfirst, willing to sacrifice anything for the greater good.  Just this whole vampire mess alone... Look at your choices. Your quickness to jump to do anything to save others. I thought...maybe you’d start getting ideas about your death being worth more than your life.  It wouldn’t be the first time...many of our ancestors believed the same. And I see the same mindset in you. It wasn’t just Lotor or Kolivan I was protecting you from.”

“God,” he says lowly as he realizes.  He shoves his face into his hand and groans.  “I wouldn’t - Well, with all my previous choices, it was easy to think, ‘who would care?’”

“I would, Keith.  We all would. We’re your family, whether we were related by blood or not.  I thought that was obvious.”

They’re quiet for awhile as Keith takes his time trying to absorb it.  Shiro rubs slow circles over his back as Keith clings to his hand. “It’s a lot,” Keith whispers again.

“...I’ve hated vampires for so long,” she murmurs.  “They took my husband from me, our happy ending right as we got it.  They almost took you from me. I wanted to destroy them so badly. All of them.  I still do. Maybe if they’re gone, we won’t have to worry about anything anymore.”

“Shiro and I are vampires,” Keith says.  “You can’t kill him without killing me.”

“No matter what you are, Keith, I’ll always love you...  Originally, I wasn’t sure how I’d feel in this scenario. I thought it would change you into something else that’s not my son. But you’re still you.”

“I still feel like me.”

She nods slowly.  “You are. You look like you.  You talk like you. ...You’re still my Keith.  ...I was afraid I couldn’t love a vampire, but I do.  ...I still do.”

A mom.  Someone who loves him unconditionally.  He sort of knew, all along, even if they weren’t related by blood, that he always had her.  That she loved him. And he knows, all along,  _he’s_ loved her.

But he’s still raw.  He’s still hurt. For  _twenty years_  she held this from him, knowing how much it killed him.

Logically, he understands.  But the pain binds him. Why did it have to be this way...?  If only he could’ve known. She didn’t trust him enough to tell him?  He would’ve never said anything.

He needs time to think about it.  A lot of time. He’s not sure if he’s happy or sad, but he is sure of one thing:

“Shiro’s the best person I know,” Keith murmurs, squeezing Shiro’s hand and looking up into his warm gentle eyes as he smiles back.  “I thought he was the exception, but we’ve found others too. Krolia, what if, all along, we’ve been killing innocent people too? I know some are bad...the ones who attacked you and your husband.  But some  _people_  are bad too.  Some humans. And you can’t just get rid of every single one in hopes you snuff out the few.  Some humans kill, some heal. ...Shiro and I, we...we want to do good still.”

She looks at the both of them and takes in a long slow breath.  She looks between the two of them, their hands still held together tightly.  “Shiro and I have been talking,” she tells Keith. “...And I think maybe you’re right.  I don’t want to lose you, Keith... I’ll help you in whatever way I can.”

“Even though I’m a vampire?”  The idea that Krolia would willingly help him knowing this still baffles him.

She smiles gently, nodding her head.  “Even though you’re a vampire. ...Come home, Keith.  You don’t have to live here anymore. We want you back.”

 


	11. Chapter 11

They return to the lighthouse.

It’s unbelievably nice to be back home.  Close, where Keith can watch out the windows and know what’s happening to the people he wants safe.

Krolia’s cleaned the place up.  She never once mentions the alcohol or how she slept in his room.  He doesn’t mention it either.

“How will you tell Kolivan?”  Keith asks.

“You don’t have to worry about that.  He’s away right now; I’ll think of something.  But in the meantime, I want you to stay out of sight.  I’ll let Katie know you’re here, but Lance, Hunk, Regris, Acxa, the others...  I don’t think it’s a good idea. If Lotor finds out -”

“- He thinks I’m dead.”

She’s quiet for awhile.  “That’s probably for the best.”  She goes back to putting fresh sheets on his bed like it’s something she’s always done.  Keith knows it’s probably because she slept in it for who knows how long, but he finds himself smiling down at her warmly anyway.

“What is it?”  She asks in that firm voice of hers, standing straight and staring back at him.

He shakes his head shortly and makes his way down the steps onto the other side of the bed, helping her put the sheets on.

When he lets his eyes flick up, he can see that she’s smiling also.

There are so many things he wishes he could say to her. He wishes he were strong enough for something simple like,  _I missed you_  or  _I’m so grateful you’ve accepted me even as I am_ or even, more daringly,  _you’re my mother_.  But he can’t.

Instead, he manages a small, “it’s nice to be home.”

She meets his gaze, her eyes warm.  “I’m glad you’re back. I almost don’t want to leave you even though you’re so close,” she laughs softly.  “...But I’ll be back tomorrow night. Can you wake during the day if you need to?”

“Uh, me?  Not so much.  It’s a lot deeper than regular sleep.  But Shiro’s good at it. Shiro and I are very different in terms of what we gained or lost as vampires.  I seem to be a lot of weaker to ailments, but I’m faster and stronger than him, I can compel basically anything - animals too.  He can’t do that.”

“Hm.  I noticed that.  Maybe it’s our blood.  Maybe it’s when you were hurt as a baby.”

He shrugs as he thinks about it.  “Maybe.”

When he looks over, he sees her watching him.  Not in any sort of harsh way, just watching him, a little dazed, like she can’t believe he’s actually there.  When she meets his eyes, she jerks back to herself. “Or maybe Shiro’s hiding his abilities -”

Keith laughs.  Here it is. The paranoia.  He smiles at her patiently.  “Krolia. I trust him. He’s stayed by my side when he had no reason to.  If it weren’t for him, I’d be dead so many times over.”

“You’re right; I...  I think it’s going to take awhile to get used to.”

“I know,” he says.  “Honestly, I’m impressed by how much you’ve accepted so far.  You’ve really been trying and I...I appreciate it.” He clears his throat.  “To put it lightly.”

Krolia lets out a soft laugh.  She walks around the bed and stops in front of him, her hands clasped awkwardly at her stomach, looking like she’s struggling with herself.  

For a moment, she holds his gaze, her eyes almost curious as she takes him in beneath the moonlight’s glow.  She holds her arms out carefully for him, hesitating.

Keith hesitates too.  She’s opening herself up to him.  It scares him... But he knows how much she’s struggling with this, with seeing him like this, so he pushes himself to meet her halfway.  He steps forward into her arms and carefully wraps his around her. It’s awkward for the both of them, but beneath the bright nervous edges, Keith finds his heart easing beneath a burden he’s always tried to ignore.

“You deserved better than this, Keith,” she says gently, patting his back.  “I wish you had a mother you deserved.”

Keith takes in a deep breath.  “I guess you never realized how many times I wished it was you.”

She holds him back tighter for a moment.  Softly, she says, “thank you, Keith. And you don’t know how many times I’ve been so proud that you’re my son.”

She lets go, taking a step back.  She smiles down at him and he smiles up at her.

The sun is starting to rise outside and so she sighs, looking out.  “I should let you sleep. Shiro too. Is he still at your alchemy table?  He loves that stuff, doesn’t he?”

“He’s a doctor.  He’s very good at it all.  Almost as good as Allura.”

She raises an eyebrow.  “Allura has magic. Allura is a witch.”

“Shiro’s determined to make it work.  He wants to make the world a better place.  Each time he sees someone hurt, he just wants it more.”

Keith can see Krolia thinking.  She pats him on the shoulder one last time and then walks off.   “I’ll be back. I’ll be watching too, making sure no one will come here.  Not that anyone does, but...”

“Yeah.  I’ll keep the door locked and the chair shoved under it.”

Shiro turns and smiles happily down at Keith as Keith comes up to collect him.  “Sun,” Keith reminds him, pointing to the window that’s letting in the dusky morning glow.

“Right, right.  But look at  _this_.  It’ll nullify most poisons, I hope.  Even the one from Krolia’s blade.”

“Hm.  Nice.”  Keith sniffs the air as he comes up behind Shiro and leans his chin on his shoulder.  “...Ugh. The smell.”

Shiro chuckles softly.  “I was just working on making it more palatable.”

“...Yeah.  That might take awhile.  This will kill us before the poison.”

Shiro laughs again, taking a spoonful of something to add to the concoction and swirling it up in the light.  The crystals capture the morning’s soft sun and flare like fire within the green goop and Keith feels a spark of longing for the sun.  He had always taken it for granted, but now it’s no longer his.

Right now, it’s just burning him though.  He cringes against it. Maybe, one day, Shiro can make a potion for that too.  But not today.

Keith takes what’s his in his hand and tugs him off the platform.  “Shiro. The light. It’s burning. Come on. Come to bed.”

Shiro sighs with regret but he puts the bottle down.

“Goodnight, boys,” Krolia says, watching them at the door.  “Don’t forget the chair, Keith.”

“Mmf.  Bye.” He shoves the chair under the door handle after her.

“Tomorrow,” Keith yawns as he pats Shiro on the back and pushes him into the room.  He’s already dragging. “Maybe we can get better curtains up here.” He glares at the window high up on the wall.  “...We’ll need a ladder.”

“Can’t you just run up it?”

“You overestimate me,” Keith chuckles and then yawns again, slipping into his room and tossing himself on the bed.  He gestures Shiro sleepily forward, but Shiro holds up a finger for a second. He shifts through their bag at the end of the bed, digging through it until he finds their two masks, the fox and the rabbit.  Finds a nail holding the twisted vines, he hangs the two masks there by the ties, in the center. “This okay here?” He hums as he takes a step back to assess it.

“Mm.  Perfect,” Keith whispers, rolling onto his back and holding out his arms for Shiro again, who complies this time, sinking down onto the bed.

“Nice to be home,” Keith sighs happily, turning his face into Shiro’s hair.

“It is  _very_  nice,” Shiro agrees.  “Dry and warm and comfortable.”

“Yeah...”  Keith traces his finger along Shiro’s spine.  “Soft and happy and safe. You were right,” Keith hums as he watches their two masks hung together above them.  “You were  _right_.  She loves me.”

Shiro chuckles, pressing a kiss to Keith’s temple.  “She does.”

“She didn’t kill me.”

“No.”

“She wanted me home.   _Us_  home.  She  _approves of you_.”  Keith grins widely as he closes his eyes and allows himself to just breathe in.  To appreciate this moment. “I never thought this could happen. I never even dreamed.”

Shiro just smiles happily at him.

“I hear what you’re thinking,” Keith grumbles around a laugh.  “Your thoughts are  _so loud_.”

“Oh, yeah?  What was I thinking?”

“‘I told you so’.”

Shiro laughs as he cages Keith in his arms and rolls the both of them over so they’re laying on their sides, facing each other.  He pinches Keith’s nose playfully. “I wasn’t. I’m just really happy, Keith. You deserve this. Everything’s right this way.”

“Hmm...”

“You do,”  Shiro repeats, firmer this time.  “Your friends love you,  _I_  love you, you mom loves you.  You’re not alone. You’re not some tool.  You’re you, the Keith that we love, vampire or not.”

“Says the vampire,” Keith whispers, pressing his finger to the tip of Shiro’s nose, but his expression is so soft and filled with love at Shiro’s words.

“That’s right,” Shiro hums.  “Says me. We need to go back to the Room of Mirrors and gather the rest of our stuff, but...besides not having random meals run in for you, I think it’s going to be very nice living in the lighthouse instead.”

“Mmhmm,” Keith murmurs with a smile.  “We can make this our home, together. Yours and mine.  You can decorate it how you want. God knows I don’t have an eye for that.”

“I can bring my wooden Keith toy collection in.  That brightens any room.”

“Oh, god, could you?”  Keith laughs.

Shiro buries his face into Keith’s neck and hums.  “I’m happy,” he murmurs.

“...Me too,” Keith whispers.  “I have a mom.”

“Yes.”

“ _I have a mom_.”

“You do.”

Shiro contents himself with kissing all of Keith’s tears away.  They’re happy tears. Keith wonders if they taste any different.  He feels like things will be alright.

 

Krolia steps up high onto the ladder, hammering a rod up above the window.  “Katie, can you grab the end piece there and toss it to me?”

“Yep.  Got it.”

Keith frowns, crossing his arms as he watches the two of them.  “I’m perfectly capable of helping.”

Shiro chuckles lowly beside him, book in his lap.

“Tell that to the last victim,” Pidge says dryly.

Keith determinedly keeps his eyes away from the window in the corner that they had to board up after ‘the incident’.  “I’m not used to being around such delicate housing.”

“You will be soon,” Krolia assures, stepping down and tugging the curtain over to make sure that it blots out the light enough.  “This seems good. The real test will be during the daylight. I’ll come check, so leave the chair before you go to bed.”

“Right,” Keith mumbles.  He looks up from Shiro’s book to Krolia’s face.  “So what are we going to do about Lotor?”

She organizes the stuff back into her tool box.  “What do you mean? Who said we were going to do anything about it?”

“What do  _you_  mean?”  Keith says, voice a few decibels from a yell.  “He told me he was going to try to use you for the blood moon.  He said, if I had died and you’d gone after him, that it’d give him the excuse he needed to  _kill you_.  You’re just going to leave it at that?”

Krolia frowns only slightly.  She doesn’t seem phased. “Keith, vampires want to kill us all the time; it’s part of the territory.  Knowing how to protect yourself is how to prevent that.”

“But he’s not just some scared vampire.  He’s  _Lotor_.  He has all the Galra behind him.”

“He always has, Keith.”

“But he was  _adamant_ .  Allura’s not here to balance him out anymore.  He tried to  _kill me_.”

“Was it even a ‘try’?”  Pidge asks, standing over Krolia’s shoulder and holding out a nail for her to put back.  “I mean. You’re one of the undead now, so that means you died, right?”

“Not helping, Pidge,” Keith frowns, turning back to Krolia, who is also frowning at Pidge.

Krolia says, “Don’t worry, Keith.  I’ll make him pay for what he did to you.  But we can’t rush things.”

“I don’t want  _revenge_ .  Revenge begets revenge.  I’m  _happy_  now.  But I can _not_  take it if we knew beforehand what he has planned and we sit here and do  _nothing_  and just  _wait for it_  to happen.”

“Hm.”  She sighs, finally clicking her tool box closed and giving Keith her undivided attention.  “Right now, Kolivan doesn’t know about this. He read the note, but that’s it. He doesn’t know Lotor’s plan.  He doesn’t know you’re here; he thinks you’re dead. Lotor’s always been somewhat of a bratty child. Kolivan and Allura would not be swayed by his word without proof.  They both know my blood won’t work. This has always been the problem. It’s probably why Lotor was so desperate for my son...he thinks that’d be the answer to all his problems.”  

“... _Would_  my blood work?”  Keith whispers.

Krolia presses her lips together tightly.  Slowly, she shakes her head. “It’s not so much a matter of if it will or won’t work.  We both know Lotor will be desperate enough to try. That’s why you have to stay here, out of sight.  But from a young age, your blood was tainted. Allura can sense such things. She thinks your blood and your body are no longer blessed, so it wouldn’t work.  Could your blood be cleansed...? Yes. But Allura would never do that to you.”

“Does Lotor know what Allura can do?”

“No.  Allura would never tell him such things.  I trust few, but I trust her.”

“Me too,” Keith murmurs.

Pidge looks between Keith’s black mood and Krolia’s weary expression and whips out her deck of cards.  “How about a game?”

“Pidge, no,” Keith gurgles, throwing himself backward so he’s laying on the floor.

“Shiro?”  Pidge asks.  “Krolia?”

Shiro chuckles at Keith, running a hand through his hair.  He puts his book away and then grabs Keith into his arms, scooting them closer to Pidge.  “Sure,” Shiro says, “I’ll play.”

“Shiro,  _no_ ,” Keith groans, pressing his hands over his face, but letting himself be dragged.

“I’ll play too,” Krolia says.  “It’s been awhile.”

Pidge grins.  “Right? Then we all have to play.  Keith, you deal.”

“I dunno how,” he mumbles, curling into Shiro, pretending to be sleeping.  He feels Shiro trying to sneak the cards into his hands. “You’re horrible,” he tells him.

“Play with us, Keith,” Shiro murmurs.

“There are  _serious_  matters to think about.”

“To stew over?”  Shiro hums in his warm rich voice.  Keith blinks an eye up at him and grumbles.  Shiro leans down and whispers, “this is what you’ve wanted, Keith.  You’ll have plenty more time to worry later. Give your mind a moment to rest, hm?”

Keith sighs, taking the cards from Shiro’s hand and pulling himself up.  “Fine. Because you said it like that.”

“Thank you,” Shiro murmurs softly to him.

“I want to go to the ocean.”

“We’re  _at_  the ocean _,_ ” Pidge laughs.  “Look out the window.”

“Yeah, but outside,” he says, dealing the cards out.  “You haven’t seen the tide pools out here yet, have you?  They’re much nicer than the ones by town.”

“I haven’t, no.  I’d love to see those sometime.  When it’s safer.”

“Will you guys come too?”  Keith asks, looking up to Pidge and Krolia.  “It’s been so long since we last took a field trip down there.  When we were kids, right?”

“Yeah,” Pidge hums, thinking back to it.  “Wow, yeah, it has been that long, hasn’t it?  Remember Lance got hit by a wave?”

“I told that boy to stay away from the edge,” Krolia chuckles softly.

Keith’s smile grows.  “He was just floundering on the edge of the rock right after, screaming.  You had to run out and get him before the next wave.”

“And somehow, he’s always surprised when I’m hesitant to bring him out on missions.”

“He’s gotten better lately though,” Keith says, looking down into his hand of cards.

Krolia arches an eyebrow.  “When did you see him?”

“Just the other week,” Keith murmurs.  He’s too busy looking into the card Pidge has placed down to notice Krolia’s silence.

He looks up when the silence goes on too long and sees her eyes trained on him, warm and soft, like honey.

“...I knew it was you,” she murmurs.  “...I never did thank you though.”

“Thank me?”

“For saving me.  When that last vampire came after me.  Somehow I...I feared you were dead, but I hoped you were alive.  And where would you be if you  _were_  alive?  I knew it  I knew you’d be close.”

“Oh,” Keith whispers softly as he remembers.  “Yeah. I was wondering why you were hesitating.”

“One vampire still got away though.”

“No,” Keith says uncertainly, looking to Shiro and Pidge.  “Um... Shiro discovered we can sort of...compel people and other vampires to tell the truth.  The last vampire was scared and said he didn’t want to die. He promised he wouldn’t hurt anyone and Shiro felt it to be true.  So we...let him go...”

Keith isn’t sure how Krolia will take it, but he knows if he expects the truth from others, he’d better speak the truth himself.  It sounds naive as he says it aloud. Trusting a vampires word.  _Liars_ , Krolia always used to say.  And here, she sits, in front of two of them, listening to their word.

Krolia doesn’t get mad.  Her lips part in surprise.  She looks between Keith and Shiro with almost new eyes.  “...Amazing,” she says softly. “...You two boys are...really something.”

Keith and Shiro turn to each other and smile.  Keith knows if he still worked like a human, he’d be blushing.  “W-well,” he says, rubbing the back of his head and chuckling under his breath.  “I mean...maybe it’s not just the two of us?”

“Maybe it’s not,” she whispers back.

Keith feels his face wrinkling under emotion again and he ducks his head, fighting not to cry.  This is all he’s ever wanted, tied perfectly into a tight little bow. He nods sharply and slaps another card down, gesturing for Pidge to go next.

She bumps her shoulder against his, laughing softly at his expression before putting down her own card.

They’re all sitting in a circle, playing a game together, almost like a family.  Shiro is here, not hiding himself, not afraid of who he is. Krolia sits across from him, smiling fondly at the both of them when they look up, accepting them.

It feels like they’re all a family.  Maybe soon, the others can come up and join them.  Maybe soon, they won’t have to hide like this. But right now, Keith is happy with how things are.  He can live like this.

As the days pass on, Krolia and Pidge bring up more and more things to fill this place with the feeling of their home.  The lighthouse’s light above keeps blazing from night to night, but it no longer feels like it’s searching. It’s their new sun, letting them know that, though they’re undead, they’re living.  Though they once thought they could only be monsters, they have hearts.

And now, their hearts are warm.

 

It’s one night before the blood moon when Keith wakes up before Shiro, which he thinks is a little weird.  Shiro’s usually always up before him, whether he be hunched over his alchemy or lazing around in bed besides Keith still, nose shoved in a book.  But today, he’s still out, completely still. He doesn’t even flinch when Keith shifts out of bed and walks up the steps to the attic.

Keith frowns at that, but pushes forward.  Maybe Keith’s just agitated and his body won’t let him sleep.  He doesn’t really know how it works; he’ll have to ask Shiro later, who is growing an increasingly large database of knowledge regarding the physiology of their bodies.  Keith tries to listen when Shiro tells him something out of excitement, but it pretty much all just goes right over his head.

The curtains Krolia installed work well.  The only light he can see are the faintest of cracks along the edge of them.  Keith leans forward, hesitates for a second, but then reminds himself that he’s always the one to sleep through the day no matter what so far, and pulls the curtain back.

It’s evening.  For one shocked moment, Keith takes in the sun-filled lands.  It’s been so long. The red light spread across the sandy shore.  The blazing yellow bleeding over the ocean. It feels like a warning somehow, bloody and threatening.

But then he realizes he can’t be in the sun.  He hisses and jerks back as pain lances up his arm and across his face, burning away at the flesh.  With one sharp tug, he jerks the curtain back over the light and clings to his arm.

“ _Fuck_ ,” he groans, stumbling up the steps toward all the potions.  He can’t see much in the dark. He shifts through the potions desperately.  He drops one and it shatters. “Fuck, fuck, fuck.”

“Keith?”  Shiro whispers beside him.  “Keith, what’s wrong?”

“The fucking -  _sun_.  I...I woke up too early,” he grits between teeth.  “I burnt myself.”

A candle bursts to life beside them and Shiro shakes the match out as he looks over Keith’s face in horror.  “Oh, god...  _Keith_.”  His hands reach up like he wants to hold Keith’s face but then he hesitates over the burns.  “Hold on.” He turns to the potions and leans over the lot of them, grabbing one from the back.  He grabs a soft towel from the drawer, dips it in, and, very gently, with the ghost of a touch, presses it to Keith’s face.

Relief is almost instantaneous.  Keith sighs at the feeling.

“Better?”  Shiro murmurs, watching Keith’s face carefully.

“Mm...  I was stupid.  I don’t usually wake up so early.”

“It’s okay,” Shiro whispers, applying more of the potion down the line across Keith’s face and arm.  “...It’s still burnt,” he murmurs. “I just saw a recipe for this I wanted to try. Give me a second.  I’ll make it for you.” He goes to turn to the table again but then stops, his eyes falling on Keith’s.  “You okay...?”

“Yeah,” Keith murmurs, reaching his hand up to rub the worry from Shiro’s face.  “Stupid mistake. It doesn’t hurt that much anymore.”

“The curtains work a little  _too_ well, hm?”

Keith chuckles.  “Maybe we should poke a little hole in one in the corner so we can tell if there’s sun or not.”

“Or don’t just toss it wide.  That’s what you did, isn’t it?”

Keith chuckles.  “Mm.”

Shiro pats him on the back softly before getting back to his work.  “I’ll have this ready in just a moment. Hold tight.”

“Right.”  But Keith is antsy.  That blood red outside.  Waking up early like this.  It feels like something’s trying to tell him something.

He watches Shiro for awhile, but when he knows it’s got to be night, he hops off the seat and nods toward the door.  “I’m going to go see what Krolia’s doing.”

“Hmm...”  Shiro mutters, not paying attention, all of his focus honed in on the way the potion is glowing and churning.

Keith bites at his lip, hesitates, but then turns, pulling a cloak over his shoulders, and leaving.

The sun is gone.  It’s night. He’s not stupid enough to walk directly into the manor like old times.  He sneaks around the side and pokes his head up, peering through the window near where Pidge is usually hunched over her own work, just like Shiro.

And she is there, back turned to the window, biting at her nails nervously.  Her full focus is out the door.

“Where is everyone?”  Keith asks, poking his head through the window of the manor and effectively scaring the crap out of Pidge.

She squawks and throws a sprig of lavender at him.  “ _Keith_ ,” she says in a hushed voice.  “You  _know_  you look like a ghost!  You’re going to give me a heart attack.”

Keith chuckles and leans his head onto the palm of his hand as he watches her.  “Is the coast clear?”

“No, stay there,” she grumbles, tossing a hesitant look away from the door.  She freezes. “What happened to your face?”

“I woke up too early.  I pulled the curtain back.”

Carefully, she reaches forward, taking his chin in her hand.  “...Jesus, Keith. That’s just from the sun?”

“Split second.”

“...It looks horrible...”  She lets go of his chin and shakes her head.  “You shouldn’t be here. Go back to the lighthouse.  Get Shiro to make something for you.”

“He already is; I just snuck away.  I was worried about you guys. I think I might’ve had a nightmare a bit ago...  I don’t remember.”

She huffs.  “Keith, come on.  I’ll come up in a second.  Just go.”

He presses his lips together tightly.  “...Why? What’s going on? What’s happening?”

She tsks and bends down toward him, whispering, “Do  _not_  tell Krolia I told you this.  Lotor’s here. They’re talking in Kolivan’s room.”

“ _Oh_ ,” Keith says, leaning back from the window and turning his eyes up to the second story.

Pidge grabs him by the collar and turns his attention back to her.  “Do  _not_  go up there, Keith.  I’ll tell you what’s going on later. But seriously, if Lotor catches you, what do you think is going to happen?”

He still wants to go up there.  “I won’t get caught.”

She gives him a stern look and then turns, picking something off the table.  Pidge hums as she dips an arrowhead into some liquid. “I’ve been wanting to get you here anyway.  Be my guinea pig?”

“Uh.  Sure. What is it?”

“Touch this.”

He does and hisses as he rips his hand away.  “ _Ow_ ,  _fuck_ , what the hell, Pidge?”

“I made it so it’s specific to vampires.  See? Won’t hurt me. It’s to incapacitate, but it won’t kill or do lasting damage...  Cool, huh?”

“I guess...”  Keith grumbles, still nursing his stinging hand.  “Won’t do lasting  _physical_  damage at least.”

“Hm.  Where’s Shiro?”

“-You are  _not_  using him as a guinea pig.”

“I wouldn’t do that to  _him_ .  But I  _do_  want his opinion on which herb combination to use.”

Keith’s still looking at the arrowhead.  “Hey... Do you think you make something to incapacitate humans?  Specifically?”

She gives him a look.  “What are you up to?”

“...Lotor’s upstairs...  Waiting this out is  _dangerous_  and  _stupid_.”

She sighs and looks at the mess of different filled bottles beneath the counter.  “Like...kill him? God, Keith. What’ll you do?”

“No.  Not kill.  I don’t want to kill anymore.  But stuff him in a basement? I don’t know.”

She sighs again, heavier.  “Keith. Don’t do that. Come on, go back.  It’s not safe here for you right now. When Krolia and them are done, we’ll go to you, okay?”

He groans.  “But -”

“ _Keith_ .  I’m  _serious_.  We’ll tell you later.”

He shifts off the windowsill grumpily.  “Okay, okay -”

The door bursts open.

Pidge makes a small little ‘oh’ in the back of her throat and drops the glass bottle onto the ground where it shatters.

“ _Go!”_ Pidge hisses.  “ _Get out of here!_ ”

Keith jumps off the windowsill and into the bushes outside.

Keith can hear Krolia heaving a sigh as she sees it.  “Clean that mess up, Katie.”

“Ah -  haha, uh, yeah.”

“We’re not done talking,” Kolivan’s voice booms.

Fighting.  Keith’s never heard them fight before.

“I think we are,” Krolia hums calmly.  “Katie, when you’re done with that, can I get you to make some -”

“- Listen!”  There’s a loud bang of something hitting the wall.

There’s an ever sharper, more bitter silence.

“Lotor is not just some random brat, like you are acting like he is.  He is  _Zarkon’s kin_.  That holds weight.”

Keith hears the roll in Krolia’s voice.  “Since Zarkon was always such a decent guy.”

“Zarkon is dead, trying to protect  _you_.  ...All the years we’ve fought together, Krolia, tell me what Lotor said isn’t true.”

She’s quiet.

Kolivan’s voice goes low.  “Tell me your son isn’t actually alive...”

“I...  If he was?”

“All these years,” Kolivan whispers, but his tone is thick with layers of betrayal.  “Everything we have weathered together and you’ve been lying about  _this_.”

“Kolivan,” she says lowly.  Each word she speaks has a bitter edge to it.  “The life I have borne into this world isn’t any of your business.”

“The future of humanity  _is_  my business.  As it - is -  _yours_ .  Don’t pretend you don’t know what Lotor was talking about.  If one life could be used in exchange for  _many_ , would that not be the right choice?”

“That’s what we’re here for.  To save the many.”

“Are we?”

“Are we not?”

“Is that why Keith’s dead?  The one I allowed  _you_  to train on your own?  The one who  _you loved_  like  _family_.  The one who -”  He stops suddenly.  There’s a harsh stunned silence.  “...That’s why you wanted us to move to those years ago, wasn’t it?  You wanted to take him away from this place...”

“...The mountains are a better place to train.”

Kolivan is silent before murmuring lowly, “...Is it him, Krolia?  Is Keith your son...?”

“Who did  _Lotor_  say it was?”  Krolia hisses. Krolia seems to remember Pidge is sitting there in the corner, watching them fight.  “Katie, we need a moment.”

“R-right,” Pidge mutters, gathering her stuff and hurrying out the door.  Keith can hear it close gently behind her.

“Is he dead, Krolia?”

“If a human runs off with a vampire, what do you think?”

“...I think he’s a smart boy.  I think if anyone could survive, it’d be him.  I think, if he is who I  _think he is_  then we need to go to Lotor right now and tell him.”

“Keith?   _Our Keith_?”

“Krolia, to be sacrificed is the greatest honor.  You, out of everyone, knows that. He will be saving so many lives.  He will be a hero.”

“You just said he was dead.”

“And then I noticed how you wouldn’t.  ...Krolia. Lotor’s just branded us as traitors.  He has given us an ultimatum that we cannot ignore.  If he brings the Galrans here and attacks our manor, I think we will lose more than just our home.”

“...Say Keith were alive.  Say he were my child. ...You think I could just sacrifice him?”

There is a long silence.  “I hope to god all those people twenty years ago did not die for your one son.”

Keith freezes.

“...He was bitten when he was younger,” Krolia whispers.  “His blood is tainted.”

“...I cannot believe you’d lie to me about this for so many years.  Krolia, I wish you’d never put me in this situation. I care about both of you.  I wish I could give you the lives you wish for. But how many times are you going to use that excuse?  ...Krolia, bring Keith here. We cannot allow thousands of others to suffer because you cling to one boy.  How is his life worth thousands? Ask him. I think he’d agree.”

“...You’ve never had a child, Kolivan.”

“I’m sorry, I am.  But Lotor has given us a very strict ultimatum.  I can’t say I disagree with it. And I don’t think Keith would either.  ...Do what’s right, Krolia. He’s just worried for humanity, as we  _all_  should be.  Vampires are tearing this land apart.”

“How do we know that?”  Krolia says.

There’s another pause.   “Who are you?” Kolivan breathes.  “...You know Lotor said. The evening of the blood moon.  Before tomorrow night.” And then the door closes.

Keith can hear Krolia’s footsteps across the floor, the sound of her falling into her seat in one exhausted puff.  

The door to the sideroom creaks open and Keith hears Krolia sigh.  “I should’ve figured you wouldn’t actually leave. You and Keith were always getting into trouble together when you were both younger.”

Keith can see as Pidge turns her head out the window, seeking him.  She looks down below and to either side and when she’s satisfied she doesn’t see him, she turns back.

“...What’ll you do?”  Pidge whispers.

“What do you mean?”  Krolia says sharply. “Sacrifice Keith?   _You_  would be able to do that?”

“No - I -”

Krolia says softly, “What would be the point in saving this land if he wasn’t in it?”

“Then...then go against Lotor and Kolivan?”  There’s genuine fear in Pidge’s voice. “Krolia.  The only two actually good at fighting are you and Keith.  And that - that’s  _great_ , but two against how many others?  Fifty? Sixty? I - I mean, not that we won’t do it...I’m not saying that, this is  _Keith_  we’re talking about, but, I...  We’ll be destroyed. There won’t be a trace of us left.”

“No, Katie, this has nothing to do with you,” Krolia whispers, softly.  “You’re starting to sound like Keith. Don’t worry. I won’t let any of you get hurt.”

“What can we do then?”  Pidge whispers. “Run?”

“I tried that last time,” she murmurs lowly.  “And so few made it out alive.” There’s a long silence.  “Here’s what we’re going to do: we’re going to visit Keith tonight.  We’re not going to tell him about Lotor. Tomorrow, I’ll go to Allura’s and see if we can work anything out.”

Keith’s throat tightens.  Oh, god. Her blood runs through his veins.  His in hers. That means...Keith isn’t the only one who can sacrifice himself.

Another harsh silence.  “ _Krolia_ ,” Pidge breathes.  “That will  _kill him_ .  He  _just got you_.”

Krolia sighs.  “...Maybe she has an alternative.  Trust me, I don’t want to die either.  But if I can in his place...” Krolia says.  “He will have these twenty years to remember; it’s more than he got with his father.”

“No,” Pidge says shortly.  “ _Do not_  ask Allura.  Do not do that to Keith.  Think of what he wants.”

“What he wants - what  _I_  want - isn’t reality.  We all have things we don’t want to do in life.  It’d be one thing if it was just Lotor, but Kolivan too...”

“There has to be another way.”

“With Lotor, we had room to breathe.  But now that he’s brought Kolivan into this.  ...I should’ve known.”

They both fall into silence.  Keith holds onto his stomach, leaning his head against the tree beside him.

Pidge was right: he feels like he just got Krolia.  And he’d be damned if he let her go now.

He’s angry by the time he gets back to his and Shiro’s room.  He doesn’t know why. He just feels so helpless.

He slams the door shut and several books fall to the floor in a dusty heap.

Shiro turns around, eyes wide.  “Where’d you go?” He asks urgently.  “I was worried. I looked behind me and you were just  _gone_.”

“I told you I was going to go say hi to Pidge.  You were just...focused.”

“I didn’t hear you,” Shiro whispers, worry still on his face as he rushes over with a potion in his hand and a clean towel in the other.  He gets to work on Keith’s face but Keith frowns against it. He knows Shiro’s trying to help, but all the thoughts ravaging inside Keith’s mind is too much.

It must show on his face.  Shiro pulls back hesitantly.

“...You okay?” He asks. The moonlight shines down on him from the window above and he looks heartbreakingly beautiful.  The way he’s turned toward Keith, face open and worried for him.

Keith has everything he’s ever wanted, he realizes.  A mother, a sister, brothers...and Shiro... Finally, right here in his hands.

“I’m okay,” he says, and he tries to make it sound normal, but it comes out low and dark.  He can hear the scowl in it and he knows Shiro does too.

Shiro moves to step back toward Keith and Keith shakes his head, holding his hand up.  “I’m...sorry. It’s not you. I just want some time alone.”

“...Okay,” Shiro says quietly.  “If there’s anything I can help you with, I’m here for you, Keith.”

“I know, Shiro,” he whispers before storming through the room and tossing himself into his bed.

Two little out of place figures on the nightstand catch Keith’s eye.  It’s him. The tiny wooden him, next to the wolf figure that he liked.  Shiro must’ve taken them out. Keith reaches over and picks up the likeness of himself.  He doesn’t really think there’s much similarity. This figure looks noble, looks strong, looks confident.

And he...he’s not sure what’s right.

It’s one thing living his life...it’s another knowing he has the power to change something so easily, sitting in the palm of his hand, and just...ignoring it.

He doesn’t want to hurt Shiro or Krolia or any of them by dying, but...he  _cannot_  let Krolia die for him.  She could do so much for this world.  Keith has faith in her to do it. The way she’s warming to Shiro.  The thoughts in her eyes as she watches them. ...She cannot be the one to die.

He has to beat Krolia to it.  Allura - Keith’s got to get to her first.  Maybe she’ll listen.

“I’m going out again,” Keith says loudly.

“Out?  ...Can I come with you?”  Shiro asks quietly as he steps down the stairs and watches Keith.

“I’ll be back in a bit,” Keith says, pressing a kiss to Shiro’s cheek and grabbing Shiro’s cloak from the coathanger.  “Can I use this?”

“Of course.  I’ll be here.”

“I’ll be quick.  I’m just going to Allura’s.  Need more herbs. You’re burning through them so quickly.  Any in particular you want?”

Shiro presses his lips together and shakes his head as he watches Keith.  “I’m good...”

“See you in a bit.”

He sprints through the forest but each second that passes presses anxiety out of his ribs and bursting out of his heart.  Not Krolia. She can’t die. Not because of his mistakes; if he hadn’t messed with that vampire at all, everything would’ve been fine.  Lotor wouldn’t have suspected him and therefore, Krolia. He just has to beat her here.

He still hasn’t fully wrapped his head around the idea of Krolia being his mother.  It feels like a dream. A dream that’s seeped into reality and he’s got to protect it.  Even if it means his life.

He finds Allura’s cottage in record time and bangs on the door.

No answer.  “ _Allura_!”  He cries, pounding on the door.  “Allura! I need you to answer me!!  This is important!” The pleas tear out of his throat.

But no one comes.

Ugh.  He’s got to calm down.  Yelling at Allura isn’t going to help anyone.  He takes a deep breath and continues.

He circles her cottage, trying to peer through the curtains of her place.  Knocking on the windows, getting aggressively desperate. Stopping. Breathing.

But there’s not a sound.  Not a whisper.

He sits at her doorstep with his head in his hands, groaning to himself.  He stays there for hours, waiting, but she doesn’t come. He supposes he should gather a few herbs from her garden so he doesn’t come home with his hands suspiciously empty.  She’s always said he could take whatever he wants, but somehow, he can’t get himself to stand. He needs to talk to her.  _Now_.

“ _Allura!_ ”  He practically screams as he throws his elbow at the door one last time.

He hears someone startle ahead of him and he turns sharply.

“Keith,” Allura whispers.  She dropped her herbs and mushrooms from her arms to the ground, but she ignores them, rushing over.  “Are you okay? What’s wrong?”

“ _Allura_ ,” he breathes, looking up into her worried face.  She falls to her knees in front of him, looking at the burns on his arm Shiro hadn’t been able to cure in time.  “You knew. You knew all this time. About me being Krolia’s son.”

She blinks in surprise, her hands freezing mid-air.  They fall to her sides. “...She told you?”

He nods sharply.

“Keith, I’m so sorry,” she whispers.  “I wanted to tell you all this time, but she made me swear I never would.  And if telling you meant putting you in harm’s way, I couldn’t argue... I know it hurt you still though, in a different way, so for that, I am so incredibly sorry.  If there’s anyway I could ever make it up to you.”

He’s quiet for a moment, the only sounds to be heard, the soft hooting of an owl in the distance.  “I’m not angry, Allura,” he whispers. “But...maybe you could help. You know of Krolia’s blood. Of how her ancestors -  _my_  ancestors - are used as sacrifices on the blood moon.”

“Oh, Keith,” Allura whispers.  “...I hope you are not asking what I think you’re asking.”

He swallows hard.  “Lotor knows. He knows of us and he’s told Kolivan.  He gave him an ultimatum: if he doesn’t give Krolia’s son up -  _me_  - then he will attack the Blades for it.  Kolivan agrees with Lotor.”

Her face slowly fills with horror.

“...I overheard Krolia telling Pidge she was going to come to you tomorrow and ask for her blood to be cleansed.  She said you knew how to do it, but you’ve refused so far. ...Allura. Please. She’s my mother. I  _just_  got her.  You can’t let her.”

“...Keith.”

“She’s trying to  _sacrifice herself_  so I won’t have to go in her place.  Allura, you  _can’t let her_.  Promise me you won’t!”

“Then what will you do...?”  She whispers. “Tell me you won’t go in her place.”

“...Allura.  Listen to me.  The sacrifice can’t work.  If it does, it just... -”

“It’ll kill all vampires in the area.  Isn’t that what you want?”

He looks up to her eyes.  Frowns into them. He whispers, “There’s so much I wish I could tell you, but there isn’t the time now...  If Lotor wants Krolia’s son, then...I think it’s only right to give him Krolia’s son, isn’t it?”

She shakes her head slowly.  “Keith, if you think you are doing Krolia a kindness by this, you are wrong.”

“Then if you  _have an idea_ , let me know of it, because I can’t think of anything else.”

She’s quiet for a long moment as she slowly sinks to a seat.  “Where’s Shiro?”

“He’s home,” Keith whispers.  “...I don’t know what to do,” he whispers, tilting his head back to keep the tears in.  “If I die, Shiro will be alone. But both Kolivan and Lotor are against Krolia... She and I...we’re not enough to fight against them all.”

Allura watches his face closely, her own tight and scared.  “...Keith, I - I’m so sorry. This is all my fault.”

He holds his hand out.  “No. God, no. It’s  _Lotor_ .  It’s Kolivan.  It’s  _fate_.”  He takes a deep shaky breath.  “I’m sorry. I just heard her talking about it right before I came here, so I’m still all keyed up.  I just - I need a moment.”

“I know,” she whispers.  “It’s a lot.”

“I... don’t know what to do. I want to protect everyone, but  _how_ ?  All I’ve ever been good at is  _killing_.  I can’t do that anymore!  I can’t!”

“Why not, Keith?”

“It’s not me.  It’s never been me.”  He swallows hard around the lump in his throat.

“...What is Shiro to you, Keith?”

“What?”  He looks over at her, wounded.

She holds his gaze.  Allura has always been the epitome of beauty.  Her bright inquisitive eyes. The long white soft hair that flows behind her, gently picked up by the wind.  There’s something about her - eternal, majestic, that makes him feel like everything will be alright.

She tilts her head as she watches him, looking right through him.  “You love him, don’t you?”

Keith blinks.  Feels himself calm.  He manages to tug a small weary smile on his face.  “...You’ve missed out on a lot by living out here.”

“Mm...  I feel like your big sister sometimes, watching you grow up like this.  It’s nice to see you care about things,” she hums. “For so long, you were so apathetic.  I don’t even know if you realized. You were so...” She trails off as she tries to think of the right word.

“Lost,” he whispers.

“Yes.”  She pats his cheek with her hands, smiling up at him.  Her hands are cold with the night’s chill. “And now, you’re found.”  She smiles. “I know it’s hard, Keith. I know you’re in pain, but you’re finally fighting for something with your heart.”  She pokes his chest. “I’m proud of you.”

He holds her hand gently, being careful not to make too much contact in case she can feel the difference in his skin.  “...Thanks, Allura.”

She looks at him for a long time.  “...Don’t go to Lotor, Keith,” she says.  “Promise me.”

He shakes his head.

“ _Promise me_.  ...If you do, I’ll promise you I won’t cleanse Krolia’s blood.  Deal?”

He turns his eyes up to hers.  It would be so easy to lie now.  To hope that he can come up with something and make his words truth.  He says slowly, “...Deal...”

She pulls herself up and sits beside him, turning her face to the moon.  “...I promise you that everything is going to work out.”

“Is that what the moon told you?”  Keith mumbles grumpily. He stares up at it, wide and luminous.  It always just watches back, never helps. “...What should I do, Allura?  ...What can I do? Is there something in your cards? Something you can feel in the stars?  I need help.”

“Everything will be okay, Keith,” she whispers, patting his shoulder gently.  “I promise.”

He vaguely remembers he’s got to go before the sun comes up and he sighs.  Being around Allura always makes him feel better. “So you  _won’t_  give her the potion?”

“Not as long as you don’t do something crazy like try to sacrifice yourself.”

He watches her for a moment longer.  “I’ve got to go. Don’t tell Krolia I came here for this.  I...said I was here for herbs.”

“Are you sure?  You’re welcome to stay here.  You sure are out late.”

“I know.  My schedule’s been messed up lately.  Thanks, but Shiro will be wondering where I am.”

She smiles, a hint of mirth in her eyes.  “Tell him I said ‘hello’. I’m surprised anyone managed to catch your eye.  You have such high standards.”

“I’ll tell him. Thank you, Allura.  For Krolia.”

“Here,” she hums.  “Take these herbs. They’re rare.  It’ll look like you meant it.”

He snorts without humor and allows her to shove them at him.

“Also...thank you for the flowers,” she says, looking up at him.  “From the festival in town, right? It was you, wasn’t it?”

“Mm,” he smiles softly.  “Yeah. You’re important to me, Allura.”

She watches him for a moment, a funny look crossing her features.  It almost looks like pain. When she wrangles the look back in place, she picks a flower from the vines growing all over her house and she places it atop the herbs in his arm.  “And you’re important to me... Take care of yourself, Keith. Krolia loves you more than the world itself. Related by blood or not, you’re important to all of us.”

He smiles.  He’s been a fool.  Family’s been here all along.  “...I know, Allura. You too, to me.”

“I know,” she whispers.  She walks to her door but stops before she turns the handle.  “One of those was for Coran too, wasn’t it? The two that you left.”

He chuckles softly.  “Yeah. What kind of family would we all be without at least one crazy uncle?”

She laughs into the back of her hand.  “I told him it was for him, but he wouldn’t believe me.  I’ll let him know; he’ll be happy. Thanks, Keith.”

Smiling, she gives him a gentle wave before heading back inside.  The light in her home flickers on. Keith can see it through the window, soft and welcoming.

Even if Keith goes back on his promise, it’ll be too late for Allura to make the potion for Krolia.

At least he got to say goodbye, if nothing else.

 

Shiro jumps to his feet when Keith quietly comes in.  Krolia looks up from her place at the table in the corner.  Krolia’s gaze is sharp as cut ice.

“Where were you?”  Shiro corners him, pinning him with eyes dark with worry.  “It’s almost morning!”

Keith groans tiredly, pulling his boots off and tossing the hood from his head.

“Oh my god,” Shiro whispers, grabbing him by the shoulders.  He runs his hands carefully over Keith’s face. “You have burn marks.   _Again_.”

“What...?”  Keith murmurs, tracing his hand after Shiro’s.  “I can’t feel them. Maybe I can look in a mirror later.  I need to sleep...”

“You  _can’t_  look in a mirror.  Have you forgotten what you are?  Keith,  _jesus_...” Shiro hurries up to the platform and grabs a bottle from the table.  He sits Keith down right in the middle of the floor and starts applying it.  It soothes. Keith hides behind Shiro’s work to keep from Krolia’s look.

“Where were you?”  She asks.

“Allura’s...  Shiro’s been burning through all these herbs so I thought I’d get some in case something happens with Lotor and we need some sort of special potion.  She was a chatterbug today, though.”

“That took you all night?”

“ _Chatterbug_.”

She looks over to the herbs and sees he’s not lying, but her frown persists.  “Keith, you shouldn’t be out. I told you it wasn’t safe.”

“Why wouldn’t it be safe that way?  It’s not like I was going near Kolivan’s.”  He waits. This is the moment where she can tell him the truth.  Her arms are crossed tightly over her chest. She can do it, if she so chooses.

She sighs.  “You said yourself.  We only have one full day left until the blood moon.  Who knows what Lotor will try. You need to be more careful.”

“You’re right.  I’ll stay inside.”

“...Okay,” she whispers, shifting in her seat so she can cross her arms even tighter over her chest.  “And stop burning yourself, it looks painful.”

“But Shiro’s potions work instantaneously.”

Shiro murmurs as he tilts Keith’s head to the side and dabs more of the potion beneath his chin.  “I’m going to stop making the potion to heal your burns if it’s giving you the inspiration to do it in the first place.”

Keith chuckles under his breath.  “I’ll be careful. I’m still learning the day’s limits...and my own.”

He takes in Shiro’s face as he inspects Keith’s skin.  His usual smiling ease is gone. There’s something cold and moping about him.  Hurt.

“...I’m sorry, Shiro,” Keith whispers between them.

Shiro tosses him a faint smile before standing to his feet and walking off to rinse the towel.

“Well, I’d better go,” Krolia says softly.  She watches Keith for a moment before walking past him, placing a soft hand on his shoulder.  “Stay inside until the blood moon passes, okay? I mean it. I’m watching the lighthouse from now on, like a hawk.  I’ll know if you leave, got it?”

Keith laughs softly.  “Is that why you got the corner room like that?”

She takes a few steps back to ruffle his hair fondly.  She bends down, leaning on the edges of her thighs. “...Maybe it was,” she murmurs very quietly.  Again, a moment of awkward air hangs between them before she opens her arms for a hug. “Come here,” she whispers.

Keith hates it a little bit.  He knows what she’s planning. He knows what  _he’s_ planning.  And it hurts to think this could be the last time they’ll see each other.

Slowly, he crawls into her arms, slipping his own around her back.

“I love you, Keith,” she says quietly, the words for him and only him.  “I was afraid of loving you, afraid if I did, I’d lose you and feel that sorrow all over again.  I really did try not to, but it seems it was impossible. I just couldn’t keep away... You’re my everything, Keith.  You’re so bright. So  _good_ \- _hearted_  and kind.  And bold. And you know when to listen to others and then when to listen to your heart...  I’ve taught you all I could,” she says, leaning back slightly so she can see his face. She pats one of his cheeks.  “But now, I think it’s  _you_  who’s teaching me.”

He chuckles softly under his breath.  “...I’m just an idiot, Krolia, stumbling over my feet this whole way here.”

“No, you’re not,” she murmurs, leaning in slightly and smiling at him even brighter.  “You’re brilliant, Keith. My brilliant little boy and I’m  _so_  proud of you.”

“Thank you...”  He says quietly, holding onto the edges of her fingers as she tries to lean away to get up.  “Wait - I... I know this is new,” he whispers. “This, uh...this  _thing_  between us.  Mother-son sort of thing.  But honestly, I already kind of thought of you as my mom all this time.  And I guess I’m still a little mad it took you this long to tell me, but...really, I’m...I’m really glad that you’re my mom.”

It feels like too much for his weak little heart.  Too much, too soon, but he clears his throat and tries to say as normally as he can, “I love you, Mom.”  And for all he tries, it’s a whisper. A soft, quiet, little whisper.

But she hears it anyway.  Keith swears he can see tears glistening at the edges of her eyes.  She grabs him with her two warm hands and leans in, pressing a kiss to his forehead.  When she leans back and looks down into his eyes, raw and exposed, they’re both smiling.

“I love you,” she says again.  “Take care of yourself,” she murmurs, pressing a hand over the side of his face that was just burned this morning.  She holds his face for a moment longer. “...I’ll see you soon, okay?”

He points toward the manor.  “You’ll be watching. Like a hawk.”

“Like a hawk,” she chuckles, nodding.  She pats his cheek one more time and stands.  She pauses at the door, looking back at him for another long moment.  “Sleep well, Keith,” she finally says. “Goodbye.”

 

Shiro is still irritated when Keith changes out of his clothes and climbs into bed.

The sun is up and Keith’s already fighting that pull of sleep, he doesn’t want another fight, but it’s not like he has much time left.  “You’re mad,” Keith mumbles into the silence when Shiro doesn’t say anything.

Shiro shifts, bringing the book closer to his nose.  “I’m not mad,” he murmurs into the pages.

“Yeah, you are...”

“I’m  _not_  mad.”

“Well...  You’re...upset.”

“...Maybe I’m upset.”

“Which means you’re kind of mad.”

“I’m not - !”  Shiro tsks loudly and shoves the book onto the nightstand.  “Okay. I’m a little mad. I am. I’m mad. You just  _left_  tonight, Keith.”

“I told you I was going to Allura’s.”

“All night?!  No, you weren’t.  Where else did you go?”

Keith takes in a deep breath and closes his eyes for a moment.  “I  _swear_  that is the only place I went.  It just took a long time.”

“Twelve hours?”  Shiro deadpans, raising an eyebrow.  “‘Just’ twelve hours.”

Keith shrugs guiltily.  “I’m sorry.”

“I thought you said we were going to do things  _together_  from now on.  I didn’t know if you’d come back or not!  And then the sun started coming up!! I thought you wouldn’t make it!”

“I...I know, I’m sorry.  But I’m alright, okay? I’m right here.”

“...But what if you weren’t?”  Shiro asks lowly. “What then?”

Keith groans as he presses his hands to his face, trying to pull his focus to Shiro, who is staring expectantly at him, but he can’t manage it.  He keeps slipping from Shiro. It’s the damn day.

“Are you worried about the blood moon?”  Keith whispers, reaching his hands up and gently trying to coax Shiro to lay down with him.  “I’m worried too. But you’ll be okay.”

Shiro groans softly beneath Keith’s touch and leans his head back on the nightstand.  “Of course we will. We won’t leave this place, right?”

Keith says softly, “What did you and Krolia talk about when I was gone?”

“I dunno.  She was asking me about my life.  About my intentions. About you. I didn’t say anything you wouldn’t want me to, don’t worry.”

“Did she mention what happened yesterday?”

Shiro frowns, looking down at Keith.  “What about yesterday?”

“...Lotor came.  He said he’d kill the Blades if they don’t give up Krolia’s son - me.  Kolivan wanted Krolia to do it.”

Shiro sits up slowly, eyes blanking with horror.  “Do they know you’re alive?”

“Hey.  Calm down.  Lotor still doesn’t know it’s me.  Kolivan...suspects.” Keith swallows hard.

“So what are they going to do?”

“I don’t know,” Keith whispers lowly.  “I...I’m worried that Krolia is going to find a way to convince Lotor to take her instead.”

Shiro stares down at Keith, face frozen in dread.  “...She can’t.”

“I know.  I could never let her.  I’d do anything.”

Shiro’s expression changes at that.  His dread and horror turn to something blank, something hollow.

“...Keith,” Shiro says.  When Keith doesn’t respond, Shiro says sharper, louder, “ _Keith_.”

“Mm?”

Shiro pushes himself forward and hovers over Keith.  “...What are you doing? What are you  _saying_?”

“I...I don’t know.  It feels like I just got all of you.  Everything’s fallen right into place, and then it’s like...this door just opens up right in my face, screaming at me, and I’m just going to let Krolia take the jump?  It’s just...maybe I am worth something, just not in the ways I always thought.”

“...Keith,” Shiro whispers.

“Ugh.  Just thinking aloud.  It’s nothing.” Keith kisses Shiro again before settling into his pillows.

“Keith...  What are you saying?  They need you... If anything were to ever happen to you...”

“Forget it, Shiro.  I’m exhausted; I’m half-delirious at this point.  I didn’t eat today either.”

“Keith,” Shiro whispers.  “Keith,  _I_  need you.”

“Come on,” Keith says, grabbing Shiro’s face in both of his hands and bringing his worried look to his lips.  He tries to kiss it off his face, but Shiro’s frown just grows.

“Don’t talk like that,” Shiro whispers between kisses.  “What would I do without you?”

Keith tries to deepen the kisses to distract him and Shiro shakes his head.  “Stop,” he says. “ _Stop_.”

Keith sighs and lets his head fall back, staring sadly up at Shiro.  “I was just thinking aloud, Shiro... And besides, what do you mean ‘what would you do without me’?  You’d do what you’ve always wanted: you’d keep helping people. Regrow their bones and stuff.”

“Keith,” Shiro keeps whispering.  “Don’t think that way. Don’t. You and I are in this together.  We’re partners. We made a promise together. ...Okay?”

“Just a thought,” Keith assures.  He shifts so that he’s on his side and he tugs Shiro down beside him.  “It’s not that I’d want to. But if the alternative means you’ll always be in danger, always have Lotor seeking you thinking you’re  _me_...  Krolia too... Well, that makes no sense either, does it?”

Shiro just stares at him hard.

“Help me think up ideas, okay?”  Keith whispers, patting Shiro’s cheek.  “Lotor’s just one person. There’s got to be a way around him.”

“One person who  _killed_  you.”

“And you brought me back,” Keith hums, tilting his head into Shiro’s warmth, eyes closed.

“Oh, no.  Don’t you fall asleep.  We’re not done talking.”

Keith hums tiredly.  It’s too late. He’s way past his limit.

“I’m still mad at you.  I can’t believe you’d think that way.  Think we’d just  _go on_  without you.  Keith...”

“Just...a thought...”

Shiro sighs heavily as he realizes how useless Keith’s responses will be at this time.  “Now these burn marks...there were more hiding beneath your clothes,” he hears Shiro muttering to himself as he leaves their room, pushing his hair out of his face in stress.

“ _Shiro_ ,” he mumbles, but he slips away.

He tries to fight it.  Tries to claw his way from sleep.  Shiro can do it, so why can’t he? He’s out for awhile, and then awake again.  He can’t find a way to move though, he’s so drugged with sleep.

 

Keith is still asleep when he thinks he can hear Krolia speaking.  Maybe it’s just dreams.

It’s true.  He wants what’s best for his family - for these people he loves.  He told Shiro he’d be beside him. Told him he wouldn’t leave because he knows - he  _knows_  - how much it’ll kill Shiro if he leaves.  If Keith dies for them. If Shiro is left completely alone.

He has to choose the lesser evil, though.  Like Krolia had to do, for him.

These past twenty years don’t feel wasted.  He had a mother all along - someone who guided him, who stayed beside him, in her own way.  Maybe she wasn’t exactly what he had wanted - she doesn’t just hand out hugs every two seconds and coddle him, but she’s  _his_  mother.  Blood related or not.  She’s the one who raised him.  She’s perfectly right for him.

He knows now for certain that he hears her talking: “He didn’t say what he told her?”

“No...  I think he’s going to do it though.  He’s so terrified of losing you that he’ll do  _anything_.  Please tell me you’ve thought of another way.”

“There  _is_  no other way.  Can you  _help me_  or not?”

“All he’s ever wanted his entire life was a mother.  I will  _not_  take you away from him right after he’s found you.  That will  _destroy_  him.  Just avoid Lotor until the blood moon is over.”

Krolia sighs.  “...You don’t understand.  The blood moon amplifies it, makes it ideal, but it’s not the trigger.  Technically, any full moon will do. You think you’re helping him, but what this’ll do is get us  _all_ killed.  We need one sacrifice and I will do.  If it’s only Keith or me who can keep living, you  _must_  choose Keith.”

There’s silence for awhile.  “Listen to me,” Shiro murmurs lowly.  “There is another way.”

A deep irritated breath.  “Okay. I’m listening.”

“Lotor thinks  _I’m_ your son...  So use me.”

“ _No_ ,” Krolia whispers vehemently.  “If you think  _my_  death will destroy him, what will yours do to him?  I see the way he looks at you. You have to know too.”

“ _Listen_ .  Keith and I have only known each other for these past few months, but he’s  _loved you_  for  _decades_.  My death will hurt him now...but hopefully he’ll forget...  But you. He won’t forget you.”

She lets out a low laugh.  “You underestimate what you mean to him.  You’re his  _mate_ .  I know you’re not well-versed in the study of vampirism, but you do not  _break that_  and simply  _forget_.  If you think sacrificing yourself is a kindness, put that thought to rest.  He and I have had twenty years together... At least give him that many with you before you start talking like that.”

“All I’ve wanted,” Shiro says firmly, “is to  _help_  people.  What good am I if I can’t even help Keith?  I love him. Let me do this for him.”

“No,” Krolia says lowly.  “...No. I can’t let you.”

“Well, I can’t let  _you_ ,” Shiro says firmly.

Keith hears Krolia expel an angry sigh.  “...But these are the only alternatives to Keith sacrificing  _himself_.”

Shiro is silent.

“So we are back to square one.”  She’s quiet for awhile.

“...Square one was Keith killing me when you told him to.  Think of all of this as borrowed time for me. I’m happy with the life I’ve been given...and the extra life after that.”

“...How old are you, Shiro?”

“Me?  I... I’m twenty-nine.”

“Still just a child.  Look. I never thought I could be having this conversation with a vampire.  Ever. But I love Keith more than anything. I always have. ...And he loves  _you_.  I see it in his face.  In the way he trusts you.  I’ve never seen my son like that ever.  I know what’s best for him.

“...I’m going to Lotor’s.  I’ll talk to Kolivan tomorrow and then the day after that...that’s when I’m doing this.  I want to ask you to do something for me. For Keith. Tomorrow night, when I give myself up to Lotor, I want you to bring Keith far from the forest so he cannot hear.  So he cannot sense it. I want you and him to have a wonderful day together. Make it as special as you can. ...At the end of it, give him this.”

Shiro’s quiet for awhile.  “...Your blade...”

“He’ll know what it means.  You won’t have to explain it to him.”

“...Krolia...  It will  _kill_  him.”

“No.  It won’t.  He’s too strong for that.  And besides, he has  _you_.”

“There’s got to be some other way,” Shiro whispers.  “If Kolivan were on your side -”

“-He’s not.  I wish there was another way, but this way is enough.  You’re a good partner for my son. I’m happy he chose you.”

Shiro sighs out sharply.  “...Krolia.”

“When you give him the knife, tell him, from the bottom of my heart, I’ve loved him since I first laid eyes on him.”

Footsteps.  The door closes.  He can hear as Shiro exhales a low, “... _god_ ,” and then there’s just silence.

A few minutes pass and weight presses beside Keith again.  He feels a shaky hand running over his hair. He feels Shiro’s face pressed against the back of his neck.  Feels the tears slipping down his skin.

“I’m so sorry, Keith,” Shiro whispers. “I’m so sorry.  Forgive me. If there was some way to convince her... I don’t know.  I  _don’t know_.”

Shiro clings to him for awhile, shivering,

“Don’t leave me,” Shiro whispers.  “I know it’s not just a thought. ...Please don’t.”

He cries against Keith’s back for awhile longer, but then, after awhile, he stops trembling and falls asleep.

Keith tries so hard to break free of sleep.  It feels like wading through a haze. It takes hours, but finally, he manages it, ripping himself from sleep’s grasp.  He darts up, awake, gasping for breath.

Old habits die hard.  He feels his chest heaving and he places a hand on it.  Lets it go still even as the panic buzzes through him. He looks down at Shiro.

Keith’s fucking pissed.  At both of them. How dare they?  How dare they talk behind his back like this?  Trying to sacrifice themselves for his well being?  Without even asking his opinion?

He’s never been more upset.  His hands are clenched into balls.  He wants to scream. But he stays there on the side of the bed, stiff, staring down at Shiro’s sleeping face.

Where Shiro had cried, there are streaks of red blood. Keith leans over to wipe them away.

He feels the burns on his arm are healed.  He sees the bottle of potion on the nightstand.  Shiro had made him burn salve and applied it instead of sleeping.

Everything Shiro has done for him, found a place in his heart, saved him, and still, he wants to give more of himself...

“You asshole,” Keith bites out harshly, tears running down his own face.  “Like I’d let you... Like I’d let either of you. Not when I just found you.”

He presses his lips to Shiro’s one last time and looks down at him, all the quiet in their room his witness.  “I love you, Shiro,” he whispers. “I wish it didn’t have to be this way. But if either one of us could continue on and help others, it’s you.”

He pulls Shiro’s cloak from the hanger and wraps it around his shoulders.  He takes Krolia’s knife from Shiro’s bag...and runs out of their lighthouse - the home that they readied a life in together.

 


	12. Chapter 12

Keith never used to feel afraid going off to face battles.  Not since he was little. He had Krolia’s strength at his back, sewn into his movements, into his offence and defense combined.

But he’s afraid now.  He has everyone’s love sewn into his heart.  And this is for them...but each step he takes is one step further from seeing their faces one last time.  Seeing his mom. Seeing Shiro. He’s scared of  _that_.

The moon in the sky hangs blood red.  Only half the moon is covered with it, but it’s enough to make Keith uneasy.  Because it’s now. In a few hours, he’ll be gone. Really gone.

Vampires feel cold but they don’t  _get_  cold; even still, there’s a chill in Keith’s soul.  He pulls Shiro’s cloak closer around his shoulders, dwelling in the comfort it brings him.  It smells of Shiro. He feels like a genius for bringing it with him; it gives him strength.  Along with Krolia’s knife in his belt, he carries the two of them with him.

He sneaks into Lotor’s property and, wrapping his hands with strips of cloth so he won’t directly touch the roses, Keith climbs the side of his mansion.  He pops out a windowpane with the backend of Krolia’s knife and tosses it away, over the greenhouse and into the grassy field over the brick walls.

He slips into the hallway and wanders the plush red carpeted halls.  It’s empty. Lotor lives in luxury. He always has liked it that way, the pompous ass that he is.  Keith’s never been able to understand him; two opposites of a line.

Keith finds his bedroom door and pushes it open.  And there Lotor lies, in his extravagant bed, sleeping on his back in perfect form like a little prince, his mane of hair resting delicately on his pillow.

For all he pretends to care about the townspeople, he never pays a second to help them, even in times of monetary strife.  And yet, his meals are probably even as extravagant as the decorations in his room.

And Lotor wonders why they never write songs about him.

“ _Lotor_ ,” Keith stands at the end of his bed and puts his hands on his hips.  “ _Lotor_!”

Lotor inhales softly and shifts, his eyes softly blinking open.

He turns his head toward Keith - and goes still.

“Hey,” Keith says.

Lotor’s face slowly drains of color and he draws himself up straight, hand clenching tightly to his blanket.

“...Is this...a dream...?” he asks slowly, carefully, face trained on Keith.  For how spooked he sounds, his voice isn’t the least bit shaky. “Are you a ghost here to haunt me?”

“If I said yes?”  Keith tilts his head.

Lotor’s surprise is already starting to fade away as he stares at Keith.  His eyes go to Keith’s chest, where the arrows definitely had gone through, then back up to his face.  Lotor grins, teeth sharp, letting out a soft deliberate breath. “That sounds interesting.”

Keith says shortly, “I could’ve killed you here, you know.  You had yourself wide open. It would’ve been disappointingly easy.”

“...No,” Lotor says, pushing his silk blankets from himself and slipping on his robe.  “You wouldn’t have done that. Because if you had...that would’ve caused more problems for you than fixed them.”

“I don’t know...killing my  _mother_  seems like a pretty big problem.  And it’s the quality of the problem that gets me, not the quantity.”

Lotor doesn’t seem to be paying attention.  He’s frowning at Keith, staring at him hard.  “...I saw you dying. I got you right through the heart.  How did you survive?”

“You were wrong about a few things, but you were right about this: I was with a vampire.  He turned me to save my life...” His voice lowers as he realizes, “...Long enough for me to come here to give it to you.”

Lotor blinks in shock.  He looks over Keith again, with new meaning in mind.  “...A  _vampire_ ?   _You_?”

Keith takes a deep breath.  Thinks of Krolia. Thinks of Shiro.  Does not let his resolve waver. “I’ll be your sacrifice, Lotor,” Keith says firmly.  “I’ll be your revenge on all vampires in the name of your father...as long as you swear to leave Krolia and my family  _alone_.”

“...What...?”

“You worked your magic with your threat,” Keith says.  “Kolivan turned on Krolia. Congratulations. But the one I was with was never Krolia’s son.  Your first intuition was right: I am.”

Lotor stares at Keith with large stunned eyes.  “You? Krolia’s son? ...By blood?”

“By blood.”

“...Are you serious?”  He breathes, shaking his head fiercely.  “About everything? You’re a vampire?  _You_ ?  Keith Kogane?  The town’s  _beloved_  Keith...  And Krolia’s son....all in one.  I don’t believe this...”

“I’ll still work as a sacrifice, vampire or not.”

Lotor grabs a match, bringing a candle to life.  He grabs it and rushes to Keith, holding it up to his face.  The light flickers over his face. There’s a bright energy in his eyes, like all his dreams are coming true and he can’t wrap his head around it.  “...Good lord, look at you... You weren’t joking, were you? You’re so pale...” He hasn’t been able to close his mouth since staring at Keith. “...Do you drink human blood?”

“No.  I’m the same inside as I’ve ever been.  All of our assumptions were false.”

Lotor gives him a look split between amusement and superior understanding.  “Isn’t that what all vampires say?”

Keith breathes out a sharp breath.  “Look. I’ll go willingly with you to the Room of Mirrors, but you  _must_  promise you won’t hurt Krolia.  You’ll leave the Blades alone.”

Lotor’s sharp eyes flick up to his, wickedly amused.  “You? Go willingly?  _The_  Keith Kogane?  You  _do_  know what sacrifice  _means_ , don’t you?  It will kill you.  Your vampirism won’t save you in this case.  We’d string your body to a pillar in the woods and wait for the sun to have you.”

Keith inhales sharply.  To touch the sun... “I know.”

Lotor’s grin stretches across his face as he tilts his head and presses closer, inspecting Keith only an inch away, as if testing him.  “It’s supposed to be the worst way to die. Even trumping Krolia’s poison.”

Keith says sharply, “Then it’ll be fun for you.  Do you want this or not?”

“Of course I do,” Lotor hums happily, eyebrow arched in amusement.  “...I just didn’t think it’d come from you. I thought I’d have to twist the knife a bit more.  I thought I’d have to make Krolia squirm. I was going to do it tonight, but...no need now.

“A vampire,” Lotor laughs.  “An honest to god vampire. ...This is incredible.  Let’s do it now. Right now. You’ve got me all excited.  Let me get my men.”

Lotor pokes his head out of his door and yells down the hallway, “Zethrid!  Ezor! Rally the men. We have Krolia’s son. We’ll do it tonight.”

He’s like a child at a toy store.  Life has no meaning to him.

Keith closes his eyes and thinks of Shiro.

 

The Room of Mirrors, where so many vampires have died before already.  The stone is weathered. There’s no blood, but there is story here, sewn into the earth around them.  There’s history.

And Keith will be part of that history.  The fear that was blossoming within himself earlier is now flooding him as they walk from Lotor’s mansion through the forest, making their way to his doom.  He has to stop breathing to quell some of his panic; he pretends it helps.

His hands tremble on Shiro’s cloak.  He feels the sturdy weight of Krolia’s knife at his hip.

...He hopes this quells Lotor’s need for this.  Krolia said his blood wouldn’t work either and Keith knows it in his heart to be true.  But what will Krolia do when she finds out what happened? Try to kill Lotor anyway? Keep the cycle of revenge going?  Keith hopes someone will be able to stop her, to hold her back. Usually he’d be the one to do it, but he won’t be there at that point...  He’ll be ash.

But they’ll protect her.  Keith believes it. As she’s always looked out and protected them all these years.

Keith sees the crumbling building up on the hilltops, the sky starting to spread from deep blues to dusky lavenders.  He feels that tug in his gut. His intuition, telling him to run. Why did the blood moon have to come now, of all years?  Opening the door for this day?

Keith forces himself to walk up the crumbling stone up into the ancient temple, every step feeling very much like a procession at a funeral.  There are the Galra there, already waiting, eager shark-like smiles on their faces as they watch Keith like he’s bait. He ignores all of them, but then he stops as he sees someone waiting at the pillar in the center of the room - a familiar face.

A lump forms in his throat.

“...Kolivan,” Keith whispers.

Kolivan watches him carefully, something raw in his eyes.  “You didn’t tell Krolia.”

Keith chuckles softly around the tightness in his throat.  He tries to quell the elation he feels in his chest at not being totally alone.  At least, in the end, he won’t be surrounded by only enemies.

Keith shakes his head slowly.  “You think she would’ve let me be here if I did?  ...I couldn’t let everyone else get hurt because of me.  Just...please...after this, please protect her.”

“You know I will.”

Keith stands there, feet away, staring up at him, at this man who cared for him since he was a child.  “I’m a vampire,” Keith whispers.

“I assumed you were.”

That lump in Keith’s throat grows more painful and he ducks his head.  “You don’t hate me?”

Kolivan’s quiet.  He hesitates before he says, “No matter what you are or what you’ve done, you’re here  _now_  with the intention to save lives.  You’re doing the right thing. That means something.  ...You truly want this?”

He clears his throat.  “It was my choice, but...I wasn’t left with any options,” Keith says.

“It’s in your blood to hold your head high into this honor.  One life for the many. It’s brave of you. We’ll all remember you as a hero.  Krolia would be proud of you.”

This is what Kolivan says, but there’s turmoil in his brow as he watches Keith in the middle of the room filled with mirrors.  Keith feels so small and pitiful as the others leer and watch with amusement.

Lotor arches an irritated eyebrow.  “...Are we done here? The sun will rise soon.”

Keith clears his throat and braves a smile for Kolivan, stepping around his giant form and making his way to his place.  He tries to hold himself taller, walk strong beneath the weight of everything.

Kolivan looks so sad.  Keith says softly, “It’s okay.  Don’t make that face... This is what we’ve wanted, isn’t it?  To bring peace and safety to those around us? A hero’s death.”

“...We will remember you, Keith.”

“I’ll get to save the ones I love,” Keith whispers, closing his eyes and stepping up onto the pillar’s platform.  “It’s not such a bad way to go.”

“No,” Kolivan says softly.  “It isn’t.”

“So how do we do it if he’s a vampire?”  Lotor asks Kolivan. “They used to slit the human’s throat over a basin, didn’t they?”

“They did.”

“But it’s not his blood in his body anymore, is it?   So that won’t work... What’d you feed on, vampire boy?  Rats?”

Keith stares down at the basin at the base of the pole.  Thinks of the blood that once drenched the stone. He’s starting to feel sick.  Starting to see double.

Kolivan says, “it’s not the method, but the intention.  The gods will hear the plea.”

“Can we just do it?”  Keith whispers. “What are we waiting for?”

“Yes, I’m anxious to get this over with as well,” Lotor hums.  He grabs Keith by the shoulder and pushes him further up onto the platform.  “To get to kill you twice - the gods have truly shone in my favor this year.”

“Even if this doesn’t work...Krolia -”

Lotor rolls his eyes.  “Her blood’s no good to us.  I never wanted her. I wanted  _you_ .  I  _knew it_ .  I knew she doted on you because of some other reason than you being some pathetic orphan.  But she  _said no_  and I trusted her, like a fool.  Never trust a Blade, as my father always said.”  His face goes serious for a moment as he breathes in deeply.  “...This is for him. For the safety he always wished for in his lifetime that he never got to see.  But  _I will_.”

With bitter sharp movement, Lotor wraps ropes around Keith’s hands tightly, threading them through the loops on the stone support.  He pulls so tightly that it draws blood, digging into Keith’s flesh.

“...You _are_  cold,” Lotor hums, pressing his fingers to Keith’s skin.  “What an interesting life you’ve lead. ...And death.” He steps back and it’s just Keith up there, tied tightly to a pillar, alone.

Keith tilts his head back to look up, past his pale hands, through the circular hole in the ceiling, and into the sky, where the stars are starting to recede.  One by one, they fade to the dusky haze of pinkish hues. These are the last stars he’ll see. The last sunrise. The last bits of life.

He lets his eyes fall to the stone, at the way the vines, a completely separate entity, climbed and grew over the stones all these years.  They wove up and around to this point here, growing bit by bit, inch by inch. Maybe it took years.

He doesn’t feel so alone as he watches it.

One day, this plant will die.  It cannot live forever. But it doesn’t seem to be regretting its journey.

He wishes Shiro and Krolia were here.  God, he misses them. Kolivan’s presence is sturdy and steadfast, and that brings Keith some comfort, but also some homesickness.  He wishes so badly he could be home.

He wants to climb those old creaky staircases of the lighthouse to make his way to the attic.  He wants to push open that stupid door that gets stuck when you want it to open but doesn’t lock when you need the privacy.  The herbs that Shiro collected in the forest are hung from the ceiling, in the way. The books that Keith has hoarded through these years, finally going to use as Shiro devours them, learns from them, will remain there tomorrow.  The next day.

Their room, curtain covering them, safe, together, as they sleep side-by side...Keith wants to go there.

Keith wants to go home.  And he has a home now, even though, only recently, he thought he didn’t.

These people are his home.  Krolia, Pidge, Lance and Hunk, Kolivan...  Shiro.

He wants to be able to open his eyes to Shiro’s sleeping face.  His beautiful lashes, his soft plush lips, the genuine openness of his eyes.

The birds are chirping merrily through the sky, spinning through the blue.

Keith pretends it doesn’t burn.  Pretends that his skin isn’t already reddening and splitting with blisters.

It’s the anticipation that’s killing him.  He can feel everyone’s stares on him. The way the mirrors are open all throughout the room at their weird angles, catching images and bending them all toward him, waiting for this moment for how many years?

Keith can suddenly feel all the  _life_  that is around them.  Even if he’s cold and lacks a working heart, he appreciates the softness of the breeze on his face, he can hear the joy that the singing birds bring, see the new growth on the vines growing around him, ticking the back of his neck.

To think he ever found a moment to grow bored with when the world is filled with  _so much life_.

The world is still beautiful.  Shiro’s still in it. His mother’s been alive this whole time.  What more could he ask for?

Yes, he’s scared.  He’s terrified. But Keith is infinitely glad that it’s him and not Shiro, not Krolia.  He’s thankful for this opportunity to trade places with them. So he lets it happen.

The sun begins to rise.  He can see it slowly crawling down the column, a powerful bright yellow orange hue that gleams as it slips toward him.  Burning, slowly, closer to his hand, Keith watches it with fascination and horror.

“You’ve done so much good, Keith,” Kolivan whispers, “for innocent people who couldn’t help themselves.  Your sacrifice will not be forgotten. Krolia loved you, Keith. Every one of the Blades loved you. With all of our hearts.”

Keith closes his eyes and lets out a shaky breath.

Please let Shiro be safe.

Please let Krolia heal.

Please let everyone he loves just  _be alright_.  He wants them to all have lives they deserve.

The sun trickles down.  Just a bit more and it’ll hit the mirrors and it’ll be all over and it’ll hurt, it will, but it’ll  _be for something_.

He never had a purpose in life before but to kill, and what was that for?  Now he knows that wasn’t him. He knows who he is now. For that, he feels lucky.

The light kisses Keith’s hand even as he cringes away and it  _burns_  -  it’s worse than all of the bites Keith has suffered, all the poison, all the pain.

Kolivan can’t watch.  He turns away.

Keith had wanted to be brave in the face of this.  To not give in to the bright manic light in Lotor’s eyes.  To just go quickly.

But he hears the pain ripping through his throat as the sun takes his arm.  As the first mirror hits and he knows - he  _knows_  it’s coming and he’s scared, scared,  _scared_  -

Something shoots through the air, cutting through the wind and thunking into the rope at Keith’s wrist.  It’s an arrow. It’s  _his_  arrow.

Keith feels the rope give as his weight unravels its weak hold and he falls forward, onto the ground.  He lands on his side, gasping in relief from the pain. He sinks to his back, trying to reorientate himself.

Keith sees, up above, landing cat-like on the roof, is  _Krolia_.  She leans over the mirror at the top of the column and cuts a knife through it, shattering it to bits.

A shadow falls over Keith, blocking the shards of mirror from falling on top of him.

Keith stays there in this safety.  He breathes in slowly, letting his eyes adjust to the darkness beneath this person’s weight.

Keith recognizes the weight, the feeling of this body pressed against his.

It’s Shiro.

“H-hey,” Keith blinks up in stunned surprise, breathing into their little safe space.

“...Hey,” Shiro whispers softly, pressing their foreheads together and holding him tightly.

Keith breathes out on a shaky breath, “How’d you know?”

Shiro’s smile is weary.  “‘Sacrifice’ has your name written all over it.”  He brushes a hand over Keith’s cheek and flashes him a small smile.   “...You okay?”

Keith nods quickly but as Shiro looks down at his hand, he sees how it’s blackened.  Charred, like a burnt meal over a fire. The burns blaze up his arm.

“...Your fighting hand,” Shiro breathes.

Shiro wraps it quickly and carefully as Krolia jumps down, placing herself firmly in between them and the others.  She glares them all down. She does not have the bow. Shiro does, strapped to his back.

“Krolia,” Kolivan murmurs lowly, stepping forward, closer to Keith.  “What are you doing?”

“You have something of mine,” she says simply, sidestepping in response to Kolivan, blocking him from approaching.  “I’ll be taking him home.”

“I don’t think so,” Lotor spits, raging over like a storm, but he stops before he gets too close to her.  He turns to Kolivan. “One life for the many. Isn’t that what we’ve always maintained? We need to  _destroy_ all the vampires, starting with  _that one right there_!”  He jabs a finger right at Shiro.

“No!”  Keith breathes, heaving himself up and grabbing onto Shiro’s form.  The sun is out, though it hasn’t hit either of them directly. The pain is dizzying.  He’s not sure how Shiro’s so calm in the face of it, but Keith is absolutely buzzing. “You’ve been wrong, Lotor!  About all of this! We all have. Shiro would never hurt anything. He’s dedicated his life to helping others, as a human...and as a vampire.  You should see the sort of things he makes.”

“You can’t be real,”  Lotor hisses. “They plague this town!  They killed my parents! They killed  _everyone’s_  families here!  They destroyed Altea!  The princess is  _alone_  now.  And you’re going to ruin that over two people?   Krolia, where has your loyalty gone? To the innocent people of this world, or to two  _traitorous vampires_?”

Krolia turns her sharp gaze to him, staring him down.  “Lotor, my loyalty has always been to my family, as yours has been as well.  You and I are not that different. Trust me when I say that revenge isn’t everything.  I’ve spent the past twenty years trying to get revenge...but that’s something killing can’t help.”

“Tell me you’re  _joking_ ,”  Lotor spits.  “My father was a  _good man_ .  He went to  _help you_ , you  _traitorous scum_ , when you ran away from your duties like a coward to hide  _him_.”  He points to Keith, still panting in pain in Shiro’s hold on the floor.  And then Lotor turns to his people, enraged. Keith can make out Pidge, Lance, and Hunk in the crowd, out toward the opening.  Acxa. Regris. All anxiously clutching the weapons on their belts, posture tense, ready for the moment this all boils over.

“Shiro,” Keith whispers, gritting his teeth, fingers kneading into Shiro’s shirt.  “...The sun.”

“I know,” Shiro murmurs into his ear.  “I feel it too.”

Shiro gathers the cloak he’s wearing around the both of them.  The cloth helps to a minor degree, but it’s not enough. They both move in closer to the wall, in the shade.  That familiar pull of sleep is on Keith and he sags into Shiro’s support. The agony in his hand and burning of his arm is making it hard to concentrate.

Krolia notices, looking back at them with contained fear in her eyes.  “You boys get out of here.”

“Absolutely not!”  Lotor roars.

“Hold,” Kolivan says.

“They’ll  _die_ ,” Krolia hisses, tossing a vicious glare at him.  “For nothing.”

Kolivan is looking between Krolia and Lotor, then back to where Keith and Shiro cling to each other and grit their teeth in pain.

“Lower the curtains.”

“We need to  _kill them_ ,” Lotor roars.

At the same time, Krolia says urgently, “That will only do so much, they need  _total darkness_.  The sun is coming through the top.”

“You destroyed the mirror so it won’t reflect.  They will  _live_ , Krolia.”

Krolia basically breathes fire for how powerfully she’s buzzing.  She looks to the others. “Do as he says.”

Pidge and the others rush around to lower the curtains and it brings relief.  The acid burn reverts back to just a warning. Lotor’s eyes are filled with primal rage.  He’s going to pop.

“Krolia,” Kolivan says lowly.  “They’re  _vampires_...  We can’t just let this be.”

“He’s still Keith.”

“He  _chose this_  understanding full well what it’d mean - a strike against us.”

“I only returned to the Blades thinking it’d be what was best for my family...and you’d better believe that I’d do anything to keep him safe.”  She stares him down.

Kolivan looks to Keith.  “That other vampire -”

“-You won’t touch him,” Keith hisses.

“I've gotten to know him,” Krolia says firmly.  “He's good.”

Kolivan watches them.

“We can’t have  _two_  vampires roaming around free,” Lotor barks.  “We can’t even have one! It’s always been the both of you who have said vampires are liars!  They’ll do anything to worm their way out of danger and then  _kill innocents_.  We must prevent that!”

“We’ll leave,” Krolia says.  “You’ll never see us again.”

“Let you go?!”  Lotor screams. “He’s a traitor!  He was meant to kill vampires, not save them!  Not become one himself!! He’s abandoned our mission!  He’s turned his back on all of us! How can we trust him now?”

“They’re not like we thought!”  Keith shouts.

“ _He’s lying_ !”  Lotor roars.  “It’s what vampires  _do_!”

The crowd is starting to argue, uneasy chatter morphing into rolling thunder.  The Galrans follow Lotor. Pidge and the others are talking quickly to the other Blades, who toss their gazes back and forth between both sides, nonplussed.

“But Keith’s been lying this whole time,” Keith can hear Acxa say.  “What if he’s lying now just to save his and his partner’s skin?”

“He’s still Keith!  I’ve been hanging out with him alone for weeks now.  He hasn’t made a move to hurt me at all.”

“So  _you’ve_  been conspiring too?”

“Conspiring?!”  Pidge gasps. “No!”

“Krolia and her son are a menace!”  Lotor steps up on the edge of the Room of Mirrors, so that he overlooks them all.  The crowd rallies around him, their aggravation needing a place to vent. He roars in the face of this.  “They’re trying to take down the only protection this village has -  _us_ !  If we let these two go: what then?  We let  _all of them go_ ?  Think of all the families that we’ve saved, that grow older  _because of us_ .  We just forget about them?  Abandon them because  _Krolia’s son_  has joined the enemy?”

“If you’ve known me at all, you know of my hatred for their kind.  It’s been so deeply rooted within me, I thought I could never spare one no matter the reason,” Krolia spits at Lotor.  “But I’ve been spending time with Keith and Shiro. We’ve been wrong. We’ve been killing all vampires, but not  _all_  are dangerous.  In our fear, we haven’t extended any effort to see beyond what we’ve assumed they are.  They can be  _good_ ; just as good as Keith has ever been, he is now.  And I have reason to believe that Shiro cares for  _innocents_  more than you ever have.”

“You think _I_  don’t care about the city I help save night after night?”

“Would you not kill a hundred innocents to get to one person you loathe?  Is that not what you’ve forced the Blades into tonight?”

Lotor grits his teeth, his glare black as soot as he turns to Keith.  He shouts to the crowd, pushing a bitter laugh through his bared teeth.  “So Keith and his mate are harmless as vampires? Wonderful to know since there’s blood in every single one of us.  What if there’s an accident? A little mistake? What if someone spills their own blood? What then?”

“Keith would never hurt us.”

“Are you  _sure_  about that?”  Lotor says. “It’s within their nature, bred into their bones from the moment their bodies died.  They cannot live on their own so they take from  _us._ ”  He takes a few steps back, flicks a knife from his belt and drives it into the thigh of a Galran behind him.

The Galran screams and blood spouts from him like a fountain, pouring heavily all over the white stone, coating it in his blood.

Keith sees it.  He goes tense all over.  He's starving. He hasn’t eaten in days...he thought he wouldn’t need to anymore.  Sharp pain cuts into his throat, and in his gut, he feels that pull...that deep need to relieve it.

“Don’t,” Shiro says urgently, clamping his hand around Keith’s wrist.  Keith's always been more susceptible than Shiro. “You can endure this.  Lotor wants you to lose it. If you do, it’s over.”

Everyone’s eyes turn to them.

 _This is what Lotor wants_ , Keith loops Shiro’s words over and over in his head as he stares into the pool of blood.  He can’t give it to him.

“You want to heal and help others so badly,” Lotor spits.  “So do it.” He gestures for his medic to give him some gauze and he throws it to Keith.  “You can be like a nurse now.”

“Keith doesn’t have to do anything -”

“Krolia,” Kolivan says, holding his hand out for her.  Her eyes cut over to him, where she holds his gaze, nose crinkled with dislike.  “...Let him.”

Krolia turns her gaze to Keith and they exchange a look.

Keith doesn’t know if it’s a stake of faith or if Kolivan truly wants to see if Keith can do it, but Keith knows there aren’t any options.

Shiro stands with him.

“The other vampire stays over there,” Lotor hisses.

Keith turns to Shiro, eyes wide.

“It’s okay,” Shiro assures him gently, running his hand down Keith’s side comfortingly.  “You can do this, Keith,” Shiro murmurs lowly in his ear. “You’re strong enough for this.  I know you are.”

But he’s not.  He hates this. This sort of battle is so sideways.  It was so much simpler when it was just kill or be killed.  Not these mind games.

Krolia watches him, her posture stiff and afraid for him.  She tries to stay strong, but it’s just a mask. Beneath her strength, she’s envisioning all the ways this could go wrong.  If he fails, no one will stay on their side. And Krolia has that look in her eye that says she’s not going to back down if the tide turns against them.  Their lives hang in the balance.

Everyone’s watching him.

As he slowly begins his walk through the quiet temple, he makes sure not to breathe, but he can still  _see_.  And as his eyes take in the red and he takes forced careful steps through it, his brain envisions it for him: the smell of it, the intoxicating way it clogs his other senses, makes him feel like he’s under some sort of heated spell.  Like he no longer has a rational logical part of his mind to work for him. Just pure animalistic reflexes, deep down to his core.

All of his muscles just want to do what they  _want to do_.  He wants to delve into this rich warm color, feel it between his hands, devour it.

But he thinks of Shiro’s starlit eyes on nights that he turns them to the sky.  Of the way his lips part into a smile of wonder as he believes, truly, that they both of them could do good.  That they could heal this world, maybe a little bit at a time no matter what they are. He thinks of how, if he fails, Shiro will be alone in the world.  The power to decide that is in Keith’s hands.

Keith kneels beside the wounded man as he trembles and stares at Keith like he’s a monster.

Keith thought Shiro was a monster too, not so long ago.  Shiro is anything but.

Keith slowly unravels the gauze in his hand.  The man watches and trembles; it’s starting to mess with Keith’s nerves.  “It’s okay,” Keith tries to tell him, but he stops immediately.

It was a mistake to talk.  The smell swarms him. He goes rigid.  Still as ice.

God, no.  He can’t give in.  He can feel Lotor’s gaze on his back, eager, waiting, his knife out and ready to jam itself into Keith’s back.

Keith holds, waits, focuses...he’s got to be strong for the people he loves.  ...He pushes on.

He slips his fingers through the red blood.  The wound is bad. Lotor and his talk of innocents...  Keith grabs the gauze and pulls it around the man’s leg tightly, making sure to stem the bleeding.

“If you hurt him...”  Lotor breathes tightly behind Keith’s neck.

But Keith doesn’t.  He binds the wound perfectly.

His pale white hands are coated and smeared in red by the end of it.  It’s on his pants, covering his boots. It burns his throat even without breathing it in, but the longer he sits in this pool of blood, the more he grows confidence in himself, in his abilities.  He slowly is starting to understand how Shiro holds his head so high despite who they are, and smiles down at Keith with confidence, saying they don’t have to be that way. They really don’t have to.

Keith steps back.  The tremble in his hands is almost fully gone.  He wants to laugh in relief.

“Happy?”  He asks Lotor.

No.  His face is a thunderstorm.  Though Keith burns the higher the sun goes, he can feel Lotor’s cold venom like a icicle in his side.

“Maybe...” Acxa says quietly, stepping out of the crowd toward Lotor.  His eyes flicker over to hers. They’ve always had a soft spot for each other.  “Maybe some are okay, Lotor...” Her eyes flick to Keith’s. “I’ve never seen a vampire not go mad from the scent of blood.”

“Some are evil,” Keith says.  “Just like people. But Shiro and I have met some who are  _kind_  and who are  _scared_  because of hunters like us.  They can’t come out in the open without fear...so they hide from us.  And we never learn the truth.”

“No,” Lotor spits, his face growing dangerously more and more red with anger.  “ _No_ .  I have not lived my entire life alone to turn around and believe that the ones who took everything from me are  _good beings_!  I have tolerated you and your team long enough.  Kolivan, surely you can’t be tricked by his false words?”

Kolivan shakes his head wearily.  “Lotor... The sacrifice is over. We need to discuss this,” Kolivan says.

“Over?”  Lotor whispers in disbelief.  “ _Over?!_   He came to  _me_  of his own accord and offered himself to this process.  Just because  _mommy_  comes running in, suddenly it’s over?  There are vampires ravaging town night by night -  _our town_  - killing people!  Over? Like  _hell_ it is,” Lotor spits.  He tightens his grip on his knife and without any prelude at all, drives it down toward Keith.

Keith can see the poison in it, like he can see it in when Krolia fills her blade with it.  Keith pulls the knife from his boot and heaves it up, meeting Lotor’s attack halfway.

“You’re dead!”  Lotor breathes, snarling, face inches from Keith’s as he shoves all his weight down with a force Keith feels his arms threaten to crumble beneath.  “I won’t let you out of this!”

“Keith!”  He hears Pidge yell and then a small yelp as someone blocks her path from him, knocking her nose with their shield.

She starts to bleed, red pouring down her face.

“Hey!”  Lance roars.  “Don’t you touch Pidge!”  He unsheathes his sword. Hunk throws a rock.

And that’s it.  There’s just chaos all around them as both sides snap at the tension.

“Looks like you’re our enemy now,” Lotor breathes down Keith’s neck as he looks back, laughing.  “Kill me, since you’ve always been the better fighter.”

That’s true.  He could probably kill Lotor if he wanted, but wouldn’t that just be proving Lotor’s point?  Keith can see the mad grin on Lotor’s face; he knows this too. If he kills Lotor, he’s dead.  Because no one will believe Keith, the vampire, is harmless then.

Well, Keith’s not that kind of person anymore anyway.  Not since he and Shiro found each other.

Keith throws himself into the attack; he’s stronger now and using that force proves nothing against his morals.  Lotor cringes and Keith can see the moment his eyes widen as he realizes he may be in for more than he thought.

Lotor’s eyes flicker down to the black charred hand that Keith is avoiding.  His dominant hand that Lotor assumed would keep him safe. Keith laughs as he catches Lotor’s gaze and realizes.

“Haven’t you heard?  I’m ambidextrous,” Keith grins.

Keith heaves his weight forward and Lotor stumbles.  The Galrans are loyal to Lotor, always have been; they rally around Lotor, their eyes set on Keith.

...On Shiro, who is trying to get to Keith, but struggling as they actively work to separate them.  Shiro’s more of an archer than anything else. The worry on his brow as he seeks out Keith desperately is more than just discomfort.

Keith turns and runs to Shiro, pushing and ducking beneath the brunt of them and jumping over some idiot who tries to catch him.  He lands right in front of Shiro.

“Hey,” Keith smiles at the relief on Shiro’s face.  He parries someone’s blow and kicks them square in the chest, sending them sprawling backwards and effectively knocking the wind out of them.

“H-hey,” Shiro breathes, pressing in closer to put a hand on Keith’s shoulder.  He looks tired. Almost as tired as Keith feels. “Thank you. You did amazing out there.”

“You’re doing pretty amazing yourself,” Keith pants, rubbing at the burning all over his body.  They can’t keep this up in this light, no matter how muted. More of the Galra are coming.

Krolia joins the both of them, face fierce as she plunges her knife into someone’s chest.  Blood spurts everywhere. She doesn’t even blink; she looks to them. “Keith. Shiro. Your skin... You’ve got to get out of here now.”

“We can’t!” Keith says.  “I’m not going to leave you alone!”

“You  _have to_.  I can handle this.”

“But -”

Partners.  They’ve always been partners, the two of them.  Krolia holds his gaze and understanding sweeps through her features.

She puts her hand gently on his arm.  “Next battle can be ours, okay? Right now, you’re at several major disadvantages.  Your hand, Keith. Your skin. You cannot continue like this. If you happen to kill  _any of them_ , we fail.  So please,” she says, pushing him toward the hole in the wall.  “Leave it to me. Trust me. I can do this. I’ll get you when it’s over.”

“It feels a lot like cowering.”

“No, Keith,” she says, small amused smile on her lips.  “It’s listening to your mother.”

He smiles slightly at that.

She pats his cheek once before twisting and continuing the fight.  It’s effortless for her. She flows with the chaos of battle so well.  He doesn’t worry for her.

“ _Go_ ,” she tells him between a kill with one last raised-eyebrow look.

He takes a deep breath, grabs Shiro by the arm, and turns to run into their old hideout.  Keith wants to wait by the opening, to listen, to go out if they need him, but Shiro drags him down to their old room, where there are still some potions and ingredients left.

Shiro lights one of their leftover candles and looks back upstairs.  “...Krolia brought my burn potion, but it’s on her belt. We’ll have to make do with the stuff here, but it’s not specific for burns...”

“I’m fine.  I’m worried about Pidge,” Keith breathes, his attention stuck upstairs like a magnet.  “I’m worried about Lance and Hunk and the others. They could be  _killed_.  This isn’t the same as fighting vampires.  All because of me.”

“No,” Shiro says softly.  “We’re here  _for_  you.”  He uncaps a potion and lets it drip down Keith’s arm.  Keith groans at the relief it brings, giving himself a moment to close his eyes.  There floor above is rolling with the sound of battle. It’s familiar, a calling.

Shiro brings him back, saying on a low whisper, “I can’t believe you just ran off like that.”

Keith turns his eyes to Shiro’s guiltily.  “If it was me or either of you... How’d you get here so quickly?  It was like you already knew...”

“...I suspected.  And Allura sent a bird over confirming what we feared.”

“Just in time.”  Keith murmurs. He nods to the bow strapped to Shiro’s back.  “Thank you for saving me. Your aim was perfect.”

“I have a good teacher,” he smiles softly up at Keith.  He brings his hands up to Keith’s face carefully and rubs at the dark circles beneath his eyes.  “...You look so tired.”

Keith turns his eyes upward, listening to the sound of fighting.  “...How will we get out of this?”

“Until one of them sees sense.”

“And in  _my_  favor,” a voice says from the door.  Keith and Shiro jolt from their seats as if electrocuted.  “My mother came for me today. Not that I could care less for her, but makes for a helpful little distraction, doesn’t it?  A fully practiced witch. My mother and her magic against your mother and her  _human skill_.  We’ll have to wait to see who wins.”

It’s Lotor.  He’s standing at the doorway with a smile on his face as if he’s already won.  And maybe he has. Pidge has her hands forced behind her back, his knife pressed against her small neck.

“... _Keith_ ,” she wheezes.  “Keith, I’m sorry.”

“Oh, god,” Keith whispers.  “Pidge...”

“Always best friends back in the day,” Lotor says in forced lightness, but his voice is tight.  He sounds crazy, voice unhinged. “Imagine if one of you died at my hands. You would just let it go, wouldn’t you?  Who needs vengeance when you have total forgiveness? Because that’s what you’re trying to make me do with my  _father_ .  He’s dead.  He won’t be coming back.  I  _will not_  forgive that.”

“Shiro and I did not kill your father,” Keith spits.  “And if you think that killing the rest of our kind will bring your father back or give you some sort of peace of mind, you’re wrong.”

“Maybe you’re right, maybe it won’t.  But I sure will feel  _incredibly_  satisfied knowing you’re all gone.”  He presses the knife into Pidge’s neck harder, drawing blood.  “Unless you do what I say, I will slice your best friend open, sever her head, and burn it before you can turn her into  _one of you_.”

“What do you want?”  Keith hisses harshly, fingers clenched together tightly.

“That one.” Lotor flicks the knife toward Shiro.  “Trade me. You get your best friend, I get your vampire mate.”

“Deal,” Shiro says.

“ _No_ ,” Keith spits, grabbing Shiro tightly by the arm.  “There’s got to be something else!” He whips around to Lotor.

Lotor says lowly, dangerously, his eyes flicking orange in the candlelight, “How about twenty years of my father back?  No? He was only killed by  _harmless vampires_.”

Keith tries to breathe.  He sees it reflected in Lotor’s eyes, sharp as a snake’s - there’s no way out.

“Keith,” Shiro whispers, turning to him, cupping his hands around Keith’s horrified face.  “Keith, it’ll be fine. We can’t let anyone innocent die, remember?”

“There’s got to be another way for both of you -”

“- I love you.   _I love you_.”

“No,” Keith whispers, shaking his head quickly.  “ _No_ .  Just  _wait_  -”

Shiro smiles down at him and then carefully pries Keith’s hold from his arm, walking away from him.

“ _Shiro_  -!”

Lotor steps back to allow Shiro through, his grip still on Pidge.  “Up the stairs. Into the Room of Mirrors again.”

“ _No_ ,” Keith says.  “The  _sun_.  Lotor!”

Lotor holds Pidge at knifepoint, forcing Shiro up the steps.  At the top of the stairs, with one last sharp grin behind him, he tosses Pidge away.

She trips down the steps and into Keith’s arms.  She shakes her head roughly, tears falling from her eyes.  “Keith. Keith, I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

“It’s okay,” he whispers, helping her to her feet.  “I’m going to get him back.”

“ _How_?!  Don’t go out there!  You’ll both be burnt.”

But he can tell from the way the light is cold and dull that the curtains are still pulled down.  

Pushing through exhaustion that’s dulling his senses, he runs up the stairs, exposing himself to the light.  He stumbles at the intensity of it, at the feeling of his skin burning and blistering. He pulls his hood over his head tighter and looks around desperately.

There, at the center of the room, is Shiro.

Shiro is pushed to the ground before the center pillar, body falling over onto the basin that collects blood, clinging to the stump of his arm tightly, wheezing out pained breath.

“This is where we  _take control back_ !”  Lotor roars to the room, torn in chaos.  “Now, we’ll end the life of the vampire who started all this!  Then, we find Krolia’s son and we  _sacrifice him_  as things were meant to be!”

He grabs one of the torches they used to get here and he lights it, holding it up above Shiro.

There’s no time to think.  Keith runs for him. “ _Shiro_!”  He cries.  He’s being stupid, not paying attention to anyone but Shiro, his focus is honed in right on him.  But there are so many different things that are going wrong right now, he doesn’t have much of his mind left.

Lotor is there.  Of course he’s there.  Lotor sees his opening.  He doesn’t hesitate. He takes it.  Lotor runs forward, jamming the knife right through Keith’s core.

Keith chokes on the pain, pierced through by Lotor’s blade.

With one satisfied, mad grin, Lotor drives it up Keith’s core deeper, twisting it, and then, just like that, he tosses Keith away like a skewered animal.

It’s just a mild poison, not even half as bad as Krolia’s.  He’ll live if there’s an antidote, but not if he’s decapitated and not if the curtains get pulled up, igniting all the mirrors.

Lotor slices the blade back through the air.  The blood from Keith splatters on the ground.

“It’s weird, isn’t it?”  Lotor says, holding the torch higher as he inspects Keith’s downed figure.  “How the blood just sits in you, stagnant. It smells strange. Stronger than human blood.  Almost like it’s rotted. Like your time is out. This is your last chance. Kill me, coward,” Lotor smiles down at Keith.  “Or have you fallen that much?”

Shiro’s at Keith’s side as the pain threatens to overcome his senses.  Shiro holds him up with his one arm, panting in pain himself. “Oh, god, Keith,” Shiro whispers.

“It all started with you, didn’t it?”  Lotor whispers, staring at Shiro in disdain.  “Then let’s end it with you. All I need is your head.”

He drops the torch into the basin and raises the knife.

“ _No_ ,” Keith spits, feeling as Shiro moves to take the blow.  Keith is faster. He pushes Shiro to the side and takes it instead, feels as the knife’s blade jams into his arm.

But it was Lotor’s plan.  In Keith’s panic, he didn’t notice Lotor using his non-dominant arm.  Lotor has two knives. He uses the other hand to plunge his knife straight for Shiro’s neck.  

“ _No_!”  Keith cries in horror, racing to meet the attack instead, but he can’t fight it off, he can only divert it.  He has to watch as the knife’s pathway is changed from Shiro’s neck right into his skull. Keith watches as the knife goes right through, as Shiro’s eyes fly wide in shock.  Lotor jerks his knife out of Shiro’s skull and aims again, for his neck this time, but Keith’s ready and he grabs Lotor’s wrist and jerks it roughly to the side, throwing him off the dais and sending him to the ground.

Keith turns back to Shiro, who teeters and then just goes limp, falling back.  Keith catches him in his arms, looking down at him with wide eyes.

“Oh, my god,” Keith whispers.  “ _Shiro_ !”  He calls.  “ _Shiro_!”  But he doesn’t respond.  He’s completely still, one thin stream of blood trickling from his temple, his face slack and eyes glazed.

There’s something so incredibly horrible about holding someone as close to your heart as you can but still not being able to secure their fate.

Shiro never wanted any of this.  He was a scholar. He just wanted to read books and put their info to use.

But a fucking knife to the head -

This is  _Lotor’s fault_ .  Lotor, who started all of this over  _revenge_.  He hides behind this fake facade of being this innocent angel, like he has no selfish design of his own.  He threatened Krolia. He threatened the Blade, Keith’s family. And now, there’s a fucking knife in Shiro’s temple.

Keith’s new life with his newfound set of morals and sparkling hopes and dreams can start  _tomorrow_ .  Keith knows how to fight.  He knows how to  _kill_  and if anyone deserves to be killed, it’s Lotor.

And Keith wants to be the one to do it.

Keith runs his hand over Shiro’s face once more, at a loss.

“You jammed a knife through his head...”

He doesn’t care if this ruins everyone’s view of him.  He grabs his knife tightly in hand, gently places Shiro down on the ground, and turns to Lotor.

“I thought you and your boyfriend weren’t out for blood.”

“Monsters don’t count!” Keith hisses.  He runs forward, rage burning through his entire being.  Lotor is outmatched. He parries, but Keith’s strength sends him off balance and he stumbles.

Keith kicks Lotor’s foot out from underneath him, sending his elbow flying up into Lotor’s face, bone crashing against cartilage.  Keith can feel Lotor’s nose break beneath the force. He can smell the blood as it breaks free and pours down Lotor’s face.

And there it is: the blood lust Keith had been careful to avoid.  It fills Keith. It robs him of whatever bit of humanity he had left and now he just wants Lotor’s  _life_.

Lotor falls to the ground, his knife skittering away.  He stares up at Keith, eyes wide.

“Wait - !”  Lotor says, hands up, the coward that he is.

Shiro.   _Shiro_ .  It’s all Keith can think of.  The pain that Keith’s caused him by bringing him into this, the malice of Lotor, the need for revenge.  Keith feels it burning through his being and he  _wants it_.  He’s going to grip it in his hands and squeeze the life out of it.

Keith is going to end this once and for all.  He brings the knife up, ready to strike down...

...He sees the way Lotor is cowering, the horror in his eyes as he truly believes this is his last moment.

Keith hesitates.  ...Is this truly what he wants?

A hand grabs Keith’s wrist.

“ _Stop_!”  Shiro chokes out weakly.  “...Stop.”

Keith is breathing heavily, out of control.  He can barely make sense of who’s stopped him.

“This isn’t you,” Shiro heaves out, but he leans into Keith.  He’s unsteady on his feet and he cringes against a wave of pain.  Keith catches him in his arms, holding his weight up.

“Shiro...”  Keith breathes.

“It’s okay,” Shiro whispers, pressing a shaking hand to Keith’s cheek.  “Don’t kill him. You didn’t want this. We can be whoever we want, regardless of what we are.  ...Keith. Keith, don’t.”

Keith stares down into Shiro’s moonlit eyes.  He lets himself be calmed by it. Lets himself feel the rage subside, the blood that’s driven him to this point of madness grows distant.  It’s just him and Shiro. The rest of the world is gone.

Lotor takes advantage of the moment and raises his knife, angled right for Keith’s heart - a mortal blow with any holy blade.  Keith is wide open -

He turns, eyes wide -

A knife comes out of nowhere, plunging into Lotor’s side.  It is Krolia who follows up, stepping onto the handle, crushing it deeper into his ribs.  “ _Coward_ ,” she spits.

With her boot smashed firmly into his chest, she tears the knife from his side, raises it high in the air and -

“Wait!”  Someone cries, pushing through the curtains, eyes bright like the moon, hair messy and filled with twigs.  “Don’t kill him.”

It’s Allura.

Her face is hard with determination as the crowd falls to silence in her presence, parting for her.  The Room of Mirrors, filled with the harsh roar of battle only moments before, stops completely. There is a hush.  The soft sound of shock.

Allura left her home deep in the forest.

Her boots strike the ground loudly.  Coran follows her, holding armfuls of parchment.

“Princess Allura,” they whisper through the crowd.  “She’s come back. She’ll set things right.”

Lotor draws back immediately, shock on his face.  He chokes on the pain as blood gushes from his side.  “...You’re  _here_.”

“Lotor.  I told Krolia not to kill you,” she says sharply, glaring down at him; tears glisten in her eyes, “because death would be too kind for the likes of you.”

His eyes fly wide.

“Keith,” she says, turning to him.  Her voice softens. “Get up.”

Keith is wincing, hurting all over.  He sets Shiro down gently against the pillar, who sinks into it, his dazed eyes still following Keith.  He doesn’t stray far.

“Allura,” Keith says, staring at her in shock.  She hasn’t been out of the realm of her home for years.  It’s like seeing a ghost casually walk in. “...What are you doing here?”

“No one is to harm them,”  Allura calls, looking up at the mess of people in the room and gesturing toward Keith and Shiro.  “I don’t care if you’re human. I don’t care if they’re vampires. You will leave them be, and you will all listen to me.”

And the room does because she is Princess Allura, King Alfor’s daughter.  She is the witch in the woods, the light that hid away in the face of darkness, that people always dreamed would come back and didn’t dare hope that’d become reality.

“Keith came to me the other night, terrified and heartbroken.  He begged me to make sure his mother would be safe from harm. I’ve seen Keith grow up since he was just a child.  As Keith has grown up, he’s always been a bit...devoid of emotions, scared to open up to people. But he had such love in his heart for these two people he wanted to protect.  Such human emotions on his face, pain, fear, desperation...only...he wasn’t human. Even then, he was a vampire.”

“...Allura,” Keith murmurs.  So she knew even then.

“Keith, talking with you the other night, seeing the change in you...hearing what you’d do to protect Krolia and Shiro...  It made me realize what a coward I’ve been being. If you died, so many people would miss you. But if I died, it made more sense.”

Keith frowns.  “Allura, no. And besides, your blood wouldn’t work.  It’s just Krolia’s or mind -”

“- No.  The three factions, the three descendents...  Our blood has the same capabilities. It’s just that it wasn’t part of tradition.  It was thought that humanity was furthest from godliness, and, to earn their way to heaven, the sacrifice was the kindest method.  It was a blessing. But Keith, your hands were tied. You had no choice. I did.

“I originally came to Lotor’s last night, to offer up myself instead.  That’s when I found a boy in the dungeons, beaten and tortured.

“Keith,” she says softly.  “He knew of you. He said you had tried several times to save his life.”

“The little vampire boy,” Keith whispers, throat tightening.  “Lotor kept him.”

“They had locked him in the dungeon and left him there to rot -”

“-Princess Allura -”  Lotor breathes.

“- _Don’t_ ,” she hisses back with venom.  “I used to think you were kind. I used to think that you care for humanity, for the living creatures of this world, but you’ve been careless, Lotor.  And a  _liar_ .  The boy could hear everything you said about wanting Krolia’s son as a sacrifice.  About the way you killed Keith when he wouldn’t tell you anything. How you would do  _anything_ for your father’s revenge.”

Lotor’s face, already pale, drains of whatever color’s left.  Allura glares down at him.

“You’re the worst kind of monster there is,” she whispers.

“My father -”

“-Him, too.”  She turns to Krolia, offering her hands out.  Krolia sheathes her blades hesitantly and takes a few steps forward to place her hands in Allura’s.

“Krolia,” Allura whispers softly.  “I’m so sorry. All you wanted twenty years ago was to live a peaceful life.  My father wanted you to have that too. He gave you permission you did not need to ask for.  It’s why Kolivan stepped up in your place. And it should’ve all worked out...if it wasn’t for Zarkon.”

“...What are you saying?”  Krolia murmurs. “Zarkon had come to help that day at the village.  His lost his life in the attack.”

“That’s true.  An ironic death, seeing as he was the one who brought them in the first place.”

Krolia goes stiff.  She closes her eyes.  “No... Zarkon was upset with me for leaving,” she murmurs, “but...but he wouldn’t have...”

“He suspected,” Allura whispers.  “The second you wanted to leave, he thought that you must be with child.  And he felt that, by taking that child for yourself, you were stealing it from all of us.  Coran,” Allura turns, holding her hand out. “Can I get the letter, please?”

He hands over a worn piece of parchment that she holds up for Krolia and Kolivan to see.  Lotor’s gaze flicks over the documents of parchment nervously. Allura continues: “Zarkon contacted a band of deadly vampires that were known to cause all sorts of trouble through the lands.”

“We knew of them...” Krolia murmurs, grabbing the letter in her hand and reading through it.  The lower she gets on the document, the more the disbelief on her face grows. “...Zarkon told them they could have us.  He gave up our location.”

“He meant to kill you and take the baby.  But the band of vampires he convinced to do it were too unruly, and, in an ironic twist, he was killed too.  Lotor knew of his plan all along...”

Lotor shakes his head slowly, trying to pull himself up as he grips to his wound that’s bleeding harshly over his hands.  “I was a child, just as you were. Even if I had wanted to stop him, what could I have done? He wouldn’t have listened. I had nothing to do with it.”

“That’s true,” Allura says.  She takes in a sharp hurt breath.  “But the letters didn’t stop then. I think you’ll find these are more recent.”  She hands them over to Kolivan, who looks over them, stone-faced. “Keith, on one of your trips to me, you mentioned there was a rise in vampires lately, didn’t you?”

“Yes,” he murmurs lowly.  “We moved back here because we were trying to find the source.”

“And that’s exactly what Lotor wanted.  Lotor’s been working with vampires in an attempt to manipulate us.”

A murmur goes through the crowd.  The Galrans stand in their places, still, some shocked, others indignant.

“If you think I’d lower myself to such a thing -” Lotor spits.

“This is your handwriting,” Kolivan says lowly, turning his eyes to Lotor.  “Offering them all the humans they want from your territory as long as they make as many vampires out of them as they can.”

“ _Why_?”  Krolia breathes in shock.  “I thought you cared about humans?!  Why would you want to turn them?”

Lotor turns wildly between all of them staring down at him.  His chest is heaving. He’s a mouse caught in a trap. “...I...  You - Everyone had just  _left_ .  You’d all given up on the fight, but  _not me_ .  If there were more vampires here, you’d realize the urgency!  This is just the natural way of things! The problem needs to be  _solved_ , not just dealt with.  My father deserved better than what he got!”

“Your father conspired with the enemy and destroyed an entire village and countless innocent lives - including that of my father!  Brave men and women are dead because of his pettiness. He is no innocent,” Allura heaves from the depths of her heart.

“You sacrifice the few to save the many!  You pretend you’re all innocent. What about  _Krolia_ ?!  She  _left_ !  You think people weren’t relying on her help?  My father’s  _dead_ because of her!  If she hadn’t run away like a coward to save her son, who was  _supposed_  to  _die_ , then my father and  _your people_  would still be alive!”

“Their deaths were  _not_  her fault.  My father  _allowed her_  to leave.  We were handling the situation fine at that point.”

“Maybe we didn’t need to handle it at all!  If all the vampires were killed then life would’ve been so much easier!”

“...Keith and Shiro are vampires,” Allura whispers lowly.  “Do you think they’re evil?”

“ _Yes_ .  Yes!  That is  _exactly_  what I’m saying!  They all need to  _burn_.  Why is it up to us to save the people?  Why can’t we all get lives of our own?”

“What if it happened to you?”  She says lowly, disgust and something like hurt on her face.  “What if it happened to  _me_?  Would you burn me?  Would you throw yourself into the flames?”

“Princess Allura,” Lotor whispers.  “I’d never allow that to happen to either of us.  Please, come with me. We’ll talk about everything.  You’ll see that what I did was for all of us. They were all being weak-minded fools.  I had to work around that.”

“I can’t come with you,” she says quietly.  She turns, carefully stepping around Keith and Shiro to step up to the pillar, where the brightest of the light is shining through.  She pulls her sleeve down and holds her hand up into it. Slowly, but surely, her skin begins to redden. The red marks begin to blister.  They begin to burn.

“...A few years ago,” she murmurs, bringing her arm back down into the shadows.  “When the vampires began to multiply like rabbits, I was attacked while I was out collecting herbs.  Coran found me. We thought I was dying, but...in the morning, I woke up like this. I was terrified at first, but, as time went on, I realized I was still myself...  I don’t drink human blood. I don’t even have to kill to survive.”

“...Princess...”  Lotor breathes, horror on his features.  That’s all he can manage to say as he takes in the sight of her anew.

Her face is set.  Sturdy. Chin out.  Allura says. “The Allura you respect and admire so much, Lotor, is  _me_.  Blood does not run through my veins...  This is who I am. A vampire, like Keith, like Shiro, like the little boy in your dungeon that you tortured.”

“...No,” he says, panic shooting through his face as he trembles and clings to his wound on the floor.  He looks so small, so silly and naive.  _“No_.  Not you, too!  You’re supposed to be human, just like us, just like me!”

“I’ve thought about it for a long time,” she murmurs, wrapping her arm calmly in her sleeve.  “I almost came to you so many times and asked you to end my life as a vampire. But I felt like I wasn’t any of those things we assumed vampires were.  So I hid myself from the world. I was a coward. I’m sorry.”

Shiro sinks to the floor, holding onto his head and grimacing.

Keith is exhausted too, stretched way beyond his limits, in muted sunlight.  He burns all over. He’s not sure how Allura is doing it, standing as tall and unharmed as she is, but she’s always been such a goddess.

Allura watches the two of them.  Her face is soft, eyes thoughtful.

“These two factions - the Blades and the Galra - have lived blinded by fear for so long...  It’s broken my heart to see everyone killing without thought, without conscience. At first, I thought maybe it’s what these lands needed for safety...but now I can see we’ve just been blind.  Foolish. Keith and Shiro are not dangerous! And neither am I,” she says firmly, looking down everyone who dares protest.

She kneels down beside Keith and Shiro, placing her hand on their shoulders.  “...Keith,” she says softly. “Shiro... Thank you for helping me see that everything -  _everything_  - has the potential to be good.  Even things people think are predestined to be evil.”  She smiles at the both of them and then stands, looking back to Lotor.

He’s devastated, but if there’s one thing he’s ever loved in his entire life, it’s Allura.  He’s still shaking his head, looking older now than he ever has. “No...” He says.

“I’m the same person I ever was,” Allura says.  “This whole time, I’ve only ever been me. You didn’t even know whenever you came to visit.  Nothing has changed.”

“Princess Allura,” is all he says.  There’s so much hurt on his face and in his eyes.

“Kneel,” she says softly, her eyes indecipherable as she looks down at him.

“...But I -”  His eyes search hers desperately, his hand coming up to her like maybe she’ll break, maybe she will kneel beside him and comfort him, tell him everything’s okay.

He turns to look out around the room.  The Galra are staring at him in some sort of horror and shock.  His mother, who fought hard for him, now lays on the ground, wounded, incapacitated.

He has no allies.

Slowly, deliberately, looking up into Allura’s moonlit eyes, he gets on one knee and bows for her.  And the rest of the Galra, hesitating, shuffle and get down on one knee as well. The Blades follow.

Allura turns and looks over them all.

Shiro struggles to pull himself up, but she smiles down at the both of them, shaking her head slightly and holding her hand out.

“But what now?”  Acxa asks from the crowd.  “If not all are evil, it means some still are...  So what about them?”

Allura says, “I’m not saying the village doesn’t still need us.  I’m not saying we abandon them in their time of need. We will still help those who need help.  But to kill first without asking questions... How many have gone into hiding? How many vampires with good intentions could have helped and spread their kindness instead of locking it away?  From here on out, we do things differently. We’re still going to help people. That will never change.”

“We can talk about this later,” Krolia murmurs, still clinging to the letters in her hand with a disgusted look on her face.  She passes them to Kolivan and turns to Keith and helps them up. “Let’s go somewhere safe.”

Keith presses a hand over his eyes.  It’s too much, piercing into his skull.

“Here,” Pidge says, coming up.  There’s dried blood on her face and she’s limping, but there’s relief on her face too.  Her nose is red from emotion. She holds her arms out for Keith as Krolia lifts Shiro. “Are you okay?”  She breathes, grabbing his hand over her back.

He nods tiredly, watching as Shiro and his mom both struggle to fit through the hole in the wall.

“I worried this would happen,” Pidge says, heaving a big bag off her shoulder after she sets him down on the cot beside Shiro.  “I brought every elixir I could think of that would fit. Here’s Shiro’s for burns. Here’s something  _for_  Shiro for pain relief and fixing his head...  We need to fix this up quickly. It can’t feel good.  And your  _arm_.”

Shiro grunts as Pidge gets to work on him quickly, her small hands fast and meticulous.

“Here, Keith,” Allura says, kneeling in front of him.  “Let me help you. He really did a number on you, didn’t he?”

Krolia steps in, placing a gentle hand on Allura’s wrist.  “I’ll do it.”

Allura looks over to her in mild surprise, warmth flooding her eyes.  “Okay...”

“Krolia,” Keith murmurs, looking down at her as she tugs his shirt up to look at the damage.

“You’ll both be fine in no time,” she hums, patting his leg.  “Get some rest. I’ll take care of you. You look dead.”

Shiro shifts slightly on the cot so he can press his thigh against Keith’s.  “...Keith,” he breathes, staring up at him, raw but with so much relief in his eyes.

“...Hey,” Keith whispers, trying to reach his hand up to touch to Shiro’s face, but he didn’t realize how spent both of his arms were, one stabbed and the other crisp and burnt.  “How’s the head...?”

“Been better,” Shiro murmurs.  “I can’t see out of my left eye...”

“We’ll fix that,” Pidge says.

Shiro asks, “How’s your stomach?”

Keith grunts as he closes his eyes.  “I can’t tell over how tired I am.”

Shiro chuckles with heavy empathy, leaning his head against Keith.  They both sag into each other.

“God.  We’re alive...”  Keith mumbles. “I didn’t expect that...so I’m good.”

“Me too,” Shiro sighs back.

“...You were very brave out there today, Keith,” Krolia murmurs lowly.  “Very  _stupid_.  And when we get home, you’re grounded.  ...But very brave.”

Keith chuckles with the last strings of his energy.  “...I’m twenty. You can’t ground me.”

“You underestimate me.”

“...Hm.  I guess that’s fair.  I’d do it again though.  I couldn’t let them kill you...”

“Well,” she heaves a sigh, gently applying the gel over his wound.  “...I couldn’t let them kill you either.”

He watches her knelt over him, patching him up carefully, a soft gentle look on her face.  The look of a mother.

It’s what Keith’s always wanted.  It’s what plagued Keith whenever he saw Lance’s mother doting on him those months ago as he wailed and cried over his wounds.  Keith smiles softly as he realizes what he has.

“...Thanks, Mom,” he whispers, throat tightening.

Her eyes slip up to his in surprise at his tone.  She smiles back, patting him again on the thigh gently.  “...And thank you, Keith... You didn’t have to bear this weight - it never belonged to you - and you did anyway.  I think you’ve been sacrificing more than we’ve even known for longer than any of our ancestors.”

Keith shakes his head tiredly.  “Don’t get them angry at me.”

She chuckles with soft fondness as she angles her head out of the light so she can inspect his wound closer.  “A mother can’t compliment her own son? I don’t think they’ll be angry with me.”

Behind Krolia’s shoulder, Keith catches sight of Allura subtly stepping away and taking her leave.  “Allura,” Keith calls. She stops and turns back to him, smiling that warm twinkling smile of hers. “...Thank you,” Keith says.  “For coming back for me, for saving us. ...But not just that. For taking a stand and saving all the others in the future too... We’re forever in your debt.”

“Don’t thank me.  It was just the right thing to do.  We all deserve to be treated kindly, don’t we?  I’ve been thinking about it for years now,” she says softly, her hand on the doorway.  “But I just...needed that little push. A little help. So it is you  _I_  should be thanking.”

“You’re going back out?”  Keith worries. “The sun...”

“I’m needed out there, I’m afraid.  I have to do some damage control, but we’ll talk later.  There are some potions I’ve created over the years; I’ll have to show them to you.  One makes it easier to resist the sun. But for now, get some rest.”

With one last smile, she turns out the corner and leaves.

“Mm...”  Keith hums, leaning his head against Shiro’s shoulder gently.  He’s so tired. Keith lets his eyes follow Pidge’s movement drowsily as she dresses Shiro’s wounds.  Shiro smiles down at him warmly.

“...Who would’ve ever thought...” Keith murmurs lowly.  “Everyone here...fixing up vampires. If you had caught me a year ago thinking I’d be here...I would’ve never believed any of you.  ...I was so lonely.”

Krolia stops tightening the bandage around his core and looks up at him.

Keith meets her gaze and slowly pulls himself up.  “...I’m not anymore. It’s why I’m still here,  _alive_ , with all of you.  ...Thank you, Mom. Thank you, Pidge.  Thank you, Shiro. Thank you, everyone.”

He opens his arm up for Krolia, and then his other for Shiro and Pidge.  Their smiles warm the entire room as they fall into him, holding onto him tightly.

“I’m so thankful for all of you,” Keith breathes.

“I love you, Keith,” Krolia murmurs.

“I love you,” Shiro whispers.

“God.   _Keith_ ,” Pidge cries into his shirt, getting her snot everywhere.

“I love you too.  I love all of you.  Thank you for being here for me...”

“Of course, Keith,” Pidge whispers.  “Not sure about the alive bit though,” she laughs wetly.  “One of the undead, remember?”

Keith’s asleep before he can reply, dragged into the darkness with a smile on his face.

“I love you,” he hears Shiro whisper to him as he drifts off.  “I love you.”

He’s so content.

 


	13. Chapter 13

Keith approaches them slowly, tilting his head a bit so he can get a better view of them all together.  They’re in the manor. Shiro is standing in the corner of the living room, warm and cozy by the fire. Pidge, Hunk, and Lance are all gathered around him, watching as he mixes his ingredients together to make a bright purple potion.

“Well, see, there,” Hunk says, leaning forward onto the table.  “How’d it go so bright like that? I used the same amount, the same ingredient, I did everything right -”

“It’s the timing,” Shiro hums, focus still on what’s in front of him.  “You have to crush the dried mushroom in your hand and slowly sprinkle it.”

“But your hands are bigger than mine,” Lance frowns at his work, shoving his head close.  “Wouldn’t that change the hand-mushroom speed ratio thing?”

Pidge is taking notes.

“Hello?”  Lance asks when Shiro doesn’t respond.

“Just a second,” Shiro mutters.  “I don’t want to ruin this part. I need to concentrate.”  He’s quiet for a moment, focusing hard, before he swings his attention over to the side, where Keith is standing and watching.  “ _Hey, Keith_.”

“Hi,” Keith smiles softly, walking closer.  Shiro watches him as he does, smiling widely.  “I thought you said you needed to concentrate.”

“I am,” he says as Pidge screeches that it’s overflowing.

“Oh -”  Shiro looks down.

“ _Go_ ,” Pidge grudges, whirling Shiro around and pushing him toward Keith.  “Let me handle this.”

“Sorry, Pidge.  Thank you.”

He’s grinning as he wraps his arm around Keith’s shoulders and pulls him close.  “How was the meeting?”

“About as fun as you’d expect,” Keith grumbles, gesturing him over to the couch where they sit.  Keith curls up under Shiro’s arm and tosses his legs over Shiro’s, groaning softly after the long night.  “I don’t even know why I was there. The Galra are such a huge fucking mess, it’s embarrassing. Half want justice for Lotor, but they’re the weakening half. What are they going to do?  Even Lotor’s told them to stand down. The  _other_  half are like lost lambs.  They’re trying to decide between a successor, but it’s never not been someone of Lotor’s bloodline.”

“They have Haggar.”

Keith chuckles wearily.  “Krolia would love that. Imagine the both of them in a meeting together, sitting across from each other at a table.  I think Haggar’s a little scared of her.”

“ _I’m_  a little scared of her.”

“Who isn’t, honestly?”  Keith laughs, contenting himself with rubbing Shiro’s knuckles between his fingers.

Shiro lets Keith play with his hands.  His other arm is still gone, but it doesn’t hurt, so they’re glad for that.  His vision’s back, but Keith can still see him cringing against a headache sometimes.  With time, he’ll heal. For now, they’re content.

“Did you bring up my idea?”

“What idea?”  Keith hums.

“Oh, come on,” Shiro elbows him in the side gently.  He arches an eyebrow. “You know what I’m talking about.”

“About going to another festival together?”

“That’s  _your_  idea.”  Shiro shifts, mischievous grin on his face as he goes in to tickle Keith.  “Oh, you’re in trouble, mister.”

“ _No_.  No, stop!”  Keith laughs, batting him away with his feet.  Shiro grabs both of Keith’s feet beneath his arm and holds him there tightly.  “Okay! You got me!”

“Ha!  I’ve caught the fiercest, cleverest, most lethal little vampire hunter in the world.”

“Or have you just fallen for my plan and I’ve really caught  _you_?”  Keith pulls his legs in and sets Shiro off balance so that he falls to his side, right on top of Keith.  “Got you,” Keith grins as he wraps his arms around Shiro’s shoulders and pulls him in closer.

“Mm...  You got me,” Shiro hums happily, pressing a kiss to his nose.

“What’s my prize?”

Keith can feel Shiro’s chest rumbling with a soft chuckle as he shifts them slightly so he can bend down over Keith.  He fits his mouth to Keith’s and kisses him, still chuckling fondly.

They kiss for as long as they can get away with it until Hunk goes, “Ugh.  Guys. Seriously.”

They break apart, smiling warmly at the other.

“...I did bring up your idea,” Keith confesses.

Shiro raises his eyebrows.  “Did you? What’d they say?”

“Well...it’s a big step for them.  They were kind of hesitant about trusting other vampires to help us on missions, but I think they can tell that just the two of us isn’t enough.  We need other people we can trust.

“So I told them about Romelle.  How we found her hurt in the woods and how she asked to help.  How she’s Altean...”

Shiro hums.

“I think that helped a bit.  Then, I told them, the thing is, if they trust  _us_  then it’s pretty much the same thing as trusting them, if we can compel them to tell the truth.”

“I trust us.”

“I trust us too.  I offered to try it on them and see if they can fight it, but they respectfully declined.”

“‘Respectfully’,” Shiro laughs.

“Yeah, Kolivan thought I was trying to be a smartass, but I was being very sincere.”

“Mmmhmm.”  Shiro’s chest still rumbles with soft chuckles.

Keith brushes his hands through his hair gently as he lulls into slumber.  “...I think it’ll work,” Keith mumbles. “I think maybe it’ll take a bit more pushing, but...with trust and with time...we’ll find more like us, vampires we can trust.  And the Blades won’t have to kill first and ask later. We can help those who want help. We’ll stop those who need to be stopped. I...I really think it’s all going to work out.”

Shiro leans his face on Keith’s chest and hums sleepily beneath his soft touch.  “You’re happy, Keith...?” Shiro whispers. “You feel right like this? Not bored out of your mind?  Not hurt being tied into something you don’t want to do?”

“I’m happy,” Keith whispers back, holding onto Shiro tighter.  “I’m so so happy.”

“No more weight on your shoulders...  Or, if there is, let me shoulder some of the burden too.  You don’t have to be alone anymore.”

“And you, Shiro?”  Keith asks, tilting Shiro’s chin up slightly so they could see into each other’s eyes.  “You’re happy too?”

“Whoever would’ve thought?”  Shiro says, bringing his hand up and spreading his fingers out in front of them.  “That the undead could help others. All these years hating them... We can do this.”

“We can do this,” Keith nods.

Shiro smiles warmly at him, pressing another kiss to his lips.  “I’ve never been happier,” Shiro promises. He smiles crookedly.  “Hey, there’s no festival for a few more months, but tomorrow night, let’s take a break from all this Blades stuff.  Let’s just hang out. You want to?”

“Well, nothing’s on the schedule, so...yeah, sure.  What’ll we do?”

“Be together,” Shiro mumbles sleepily.  He cuddles up on Keith’s chest and Keith laughs.

“If we fall asleep now, we’re just going to be passed out in the living room all day.”

“Don’t care,” Shiro sighs.

“God,” Keith laughs, but he doesn’t really feel like carrying Shiro all the way back to the lighthouse this early in the day.

He sees Pidge turning around and laughing at them quietly, shaking her head in exasperation and rolling her eyes when they make eye contact.  He chuckles wearily back. He knows they’re safe here, surrounded by these people. They don’t have to worry that someone will find them and kill them in their sleep.  They’re safe. They’re protected. They’re loved. So he lets himself drift to sleep right there in the middle of the manor, sprawled out on the couch, Shiro still held tightly in his arms.  Even Lance doesn’t bother them.

 

The ocean is gentle, the sound it makes melodic and soothing.  Calm, as it often is here. Keith can smell the salt in the air, feel the air thick with ocean as the wind blows around them.  They hold hands as they walk barefoot through the soft smooth sand on the shore, back toward the lighthouse after spending a night out in the tide pools with their friends.  Everyone else went ahead so Keith and Shiro are still catching up.  They were too loud anyway; Keith needed a break.

Keith laughs as a little dark blob scurries past.  “Look. It’s a crab.”

“Leave it alone,” Shiro says with a patient chuckle, poking Keith in the ribs.

“It might taste good.”

“ _You_ try it then.”

“Ugh.  Its blood is blue.  That’s gross.”

“Uh-huh.  That’s what I thought.”

They keep walking.  It’s nice to just take a night off and walk.  Since Allura has come back, things are changing.  They no longer kill blindly. Keith no longer feels that hopeless gnawing desperation in his chest.  Keith made a vow not to kill, so he won’t, but he protects the Blades and the innocent, if any of them need it.

But the Blades often don’t.  Keith trains them well.

Shiro is good at talking, at diffusing situations, at convincing others to reconsider their ways.  And on his belt are elixirs he made, to cure.

Not everything’s perfect - they don’t win every round in the ways they want - but some days it feels like things really  _are_  perfect, with the both of their hands intertwined, together.

They stop their journey outward and head up the beach, out of the water.  Their feet press into the warm sand, still heated from the day’s sun.

They can see Pidge, Lance, and Hunk nearby with sparklers in hand, laughing as the golden light whizzes through the dark night air, drawing bright gold through the dreary fog.  Krolia lifts one of her own, trying to show Allura how to use it, who tilts her head and stares at it in fascination. Krolia turns, seeking out Keith.

Keith waves to her.

“Want one?”  She asks.

Keith grins, opening one of his hands and Krolia tosses two.

“Here,” he murmurs to Shiro, holding it out.

“How do you hold it?”

Keith laughs.  “It’s not a trick.  Just hold this end.”

“What’s up?”  Lance asks, digging his feet through the sand as he comes over.  “Having problems?”

“I’ve never done this before,” Shiro says.  “We didn’t have fancy things like sparklers.”

“For real?”  Hunk waves his through the air in the form of a flower.  “It’s like a bit of stars right in the palm of your hand.  Well, at the end of the stick that’s in the palm of your hand, but that’s basically the same thing.”

Pidge steps in beside Shiro, her glasses catching the light.  “Shiro’s first sparkler adventure.”

“Feels like a christening,” Lance grins at Shiro and then over to Keith.

Allura and Krolia come over and they all gather in a circle on the ocean’s calm shore, the sparklers in their hands dancing like tiny stars in the moonlit night.

Krolia looks down at Keith’s unlit sparkler.  “Here,” she says, gesturing toward the light that burns magnificently at the end of hers, like a torch filled with magic.  He lifts his and they touch. His bursts to life.

“Thanks, Mom,” he smiles warmly.

He grins over at Shiro, who waits with a smile on his face.  “You’re the last one. I can’t believe you’ve never done this.  Mr. Professional festival goer.”

“Maybe I was waiting for you.”

Keith grins wider.

The light reflects off Shiro’s pale hand as Keith holds the light near him.  The ends of their sparklers touch and Shiro’s blazes to life. They smile together, looking at the golden sparks within both of their hands.

“It’s beautiful,” Shiro whispers.

“Yes,” Keith hums, squeezing his hand.  “It really is.”

And they’re all there.  All of them. Gathered together in this warm circle, full of friends, full of family.  There’s laughter in the air, warmth in the sand, and a gentle breeze stirring up movement.  He has Shiro on one side, his mother on the other, his friends gathered around.

Keith’s not alone anymore.  He’s not stagnant or locked down or scared of who he is.  They didn’t end up quite where Keith though they all would, being a vampire and all that, but it’s like the pieces have all fallen into place finally.  Like he knows his enemy, he knows himself, and finally,  _finally_ , the world makes sense for him.  He fits in place.

The lighthouse burns brightly up on the hill above them.  It’s beautiful, a beacon in the darkness, a reminder always drawing them here, to this place surrounded by family.

Keith and Shiro have all the time they want to fill this lighthouse with all the things they want to.  To make it theirs, a place they can rest peacefully and without fear.

Keith smiles up at Shiro, sees the way the moonlight shines on his beautiful face.  It only took one person to change Keith’s mind. One vampire, his mortal enemy. And now look.

Keith leans into his shoulder.  He’s so soft. So content. He has everything he’s ever wanted.

He’s finally here.

Home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! I hope you liked it. <3
> 
> As always, my twitter is [here!](https://twitter.com/go__begreat)


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